Prologue: Twintails and IDo you know what twintails are?
Until quite recently, how many would have been able to reply?
A hairstyle in which the hair is tied into two strands. Although the name directly shows that, the most people would not be able to even think of the shape. This was about as much normal people knew about twintails. However since a certain day people all over the world learnt about this hairstyle. A monster trying to take ‘something’ away from people, starting from twintails. And a girl fighting to defend that. At first people thought it was a joke. They say that hair is a girl’s life... but here I’m risking my life for a hairstyle. For me twintails was a sign of youth. Even though I tried to grow up and act like an adult, n.o.body would ever look at me like that. Even though I would study much harder than others and achieve great results. Even though I would always act as a role model, becoming the student council present and representing thousands of students. n.o.body would recognize me as an adult.
Even at an age when I’m old enough to get married, everyone around me sees me as a child.
It’s obvious. I have the appearance of elementary schoolgirl. That wall will remain unclimbable no matter how much I improve myself on the inside.
That’s why I needed twintails. Because I did not want to accept the reality that I could not grow any more.
Continuing to wear twintails was my final effort at resistance – a symbol of immaturity which was only held in place by a ribbon. And the hairstyle which had been originally forced upon by my mother in my childhood gave me such a good excuse.
Whenever people look at me with affectionate eyes, as if I were a pet, I think : “it’s because of the twintails. Only if I didn’t have them.”
I kept blaming my child-like appearance on my twintails even though I did not have the courage to abandon them.
However, one day I saw TailRed, a young girl with twintails fluttering in the breeze like the flags of the world, fight against monstrous invaders from another universe so big you would have to raise your head just to meet their eyes. I realized the truth: that the very fact that I was consoling myself in this way was immature.
I used to love heroes, especially those from children’s shows. The lonely heroes which fought on even as n.o.body would care for them seemed to be so exalted and soothed my mind more than anything else. And so the girl dancing with excellence in the real world was the very thing which I had been admiring since I was young. The girl who would continue to fight without a care about the harsh stares and rumours seemed to shine like the sun for me.
Before I knew it my heart had completely fallen for Tail Red. The n.o.ble promise that as long as I loved twintails, she would come to save me. I broke that promise with her. She saved me multiple times, when I did not love twintails.
A small girl risking her life to protect twintails. The hero that I admire. Will she rescue me even if she knows my true feelings? Will she still smile as always even if I confess what I feel about twintails?
I want her to see. Everything about me. My naked self.
The impure woman who insults the beloved twintails and then hides it to receive salvation. I really want her to know. I want her to penetrate me. I want her to force her way in. Without the courage to admit it, I became enveloped by such fantasies. Please, look at me. My real twintails –