After we confirmed that where we landed was not moss, the two of us sat down together where the weeds sprouted from the soil of where the tree"s roots were, where there the plants had grown green.
「Uhm, Marisan」Sashia asked me.
「Hm?」I responded.
「When did you notice that I wasn"t acting like myself」He questioned.
「…From the very beginning, I had noticed that you had gone pale」I replied.
Wasn"t pointing out the change in his demeanor supposed to be as simple as that? Or was it that until now, he was able to keep up his mask and keep it concealed? Maybe it was both… In reality, the game"s heroine was the only one to discover the difference in Sashia"s behavior but never called it out. I guess I haven"t been watching myself as carefully as I had thought.
Having already lived through the game five times, I have already noticed the preconception of Sashia which was a.s.suring but, it was a mere foul technique, why? Because it made me receive these feelings of guilt. But also, I had to separate the previous runs of Sashia from this one. By no means was I going to lose my way in the end! Never!
「I should"ve kept myself from noticing at the time, I"m so sorry!」I apologized.
「Marisan you didn"t do anything wrong at all! I was being unreasonable by trying to keep up my family name, therefore it was my mistake!」Sashia spoke back.
m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.tic smiles truly don"t match Sashia at all! Is it because it was so striking that I wanted to laugh? is the thought of seemingly laughing at children loudly so evil? Although I felt as though it was only a smile that seems painful after engaging with someone like Maria Bell… more so, it"s a funny thing to see.
「The way of the night doesn"t look so good」I stated.
The dark road tonight is very scary…
I had to restrain myself from casting my eyes down at Sashia"s smile, keeping my expression hidden behind my hair with my mouth stiff in a small smile. If Sashia were to see me… well let"s see…
I tried as best as I could to keep my voice up and lively, but to my own dissatisfaction, my voice was not able to produce such liveliness.
For Sashia, the first thing I wanted to hide was the very chance of the discovery of my lies. I wanted to only be left alone somewhere far far away.
「I know about my grandfather」 Sashia spoke softly.
「Eh… Roman Dorothy」 I responded
Recorded in history and in textbooks, Roman Dorothy was the world"s best flame magician. Those who learn magic and even those who aren"t able to use magic alike as well as those from far away know of his greatness and very being. Just to be able to see him from a distance away would make you feel higher than the clouds themselves! But to Sashia, he was just a grandfather.
「The truth is… he"s an amazing person, and everyone knows it」he spoke happily.
Everyone praised him and Sashia blushed with respect on his cheeks. And if that"s the case, everyone called him great. It was something to grow accustomed to, but in that case, Sashia had greatness to be expected from him. Because he descended from that person, he had the right to be chasing after his legacy.
His grandfather"s child, Sashia"s father, was unable to conjure magic for years. Early as a magician, his expectations faded and he married into a commoner"s family like everyone else, but then Sashia was born. It"s a lovely story, a common type of happiness. There is nothing more to wish for after all, but some dramatics would be nice. A small change came to such a family after Sashia was able to run and started to play.
「Do you know of attribute magic holders?」Sashia asked me.
「Well…」I responded.
「I- that… Come again?」I could only sputter out.
Sashia"s family, while being that of a commoners, was very close to magic because of their world"s best flame magician relative. It was said that they used a little bit of magic everyday without being tied to any attributes.
That"s right, with one of the best magicians by my side, I could expect anything and I would be able to handle it. It is a smart move to trust yourself more than your tutor. Even though I was greatly satisfied by my tutor Lindsensei.
But Sashia said he was an attribute holder… I didn"t hear it, or it was a secret to Mariabell, but both could exist.
「Because i know now, my perspective has changed」I said.
There are many people who refuse to look at it and accept that the n.o.bility have troubles controlling their magic, not to mention it"s a secret kept away from public knowledge. I learned the method of controlling my magic from Lindsensei, and if I learn it properly, my control over magic will be the same as an ordinary magician.
Normally for us, it is different from attribute magic holders as well. The nature of magic differs from person to person.
It was individuality, but also specialty. By nature, you inherit your abilities through blood, like Sashia, who it was said that his surroundings reacted to the magic around him. It is easier to hard if you are from a n.o.ble birth, but for commoners who don"t live such easy lives without access to secret services, it can be difficult, especially if they didn"t get along with their neighbors. Especially if it had anything to do with a n.o.ble, those secrets were good stories to listen to.
In Sashia"s case, there was a heavy expectation that he was going to fail and with that came a lot of pressure upon Sashia, but from afar it"s hard to see what type of difficulties he is struggling with. Expectations are things to be evaluated, and ones to keep an eye on.
Even among young children, if there is any reason to have it, heavy pressure can be reflected as jealousy. And it"s difficult for such young children to try and suppress such an intense jealousy. There is no time to run away in such a small place like school.
「I was invited by a friend to come here to the forest at night, the woods aren"t a big deal since during the day, it becomes everyone"s playground」Sashia said.
This forest is a small and narrow place. During the night, there is barely any moonlight, making this place dark, but during the day, children’s voices overflow from this park, giving the impression that this is a safe place. Seemingly, children have made this place seem playful.
「I don"t think I could appreciate this place. I"m just a little surprised」 he spoke.
He must have been stressed out by comparing himself to his friends, Sashia must be envious of them. But since I only had one close friend, I couldn"t relate to Sashia who had so many. I"m just a little bit worried for Sashia, he might be the descendant of a wonderful wizard, but now he is just a child, and he can"t change that! And I think Sashia know that about himself as well.
By the time I noticed, I was already alone he spoke solemnly.
That doesn"t mean you were deserted, you are just a bit fearful right now. Sashia was dark, thoughtless of the sound of the wind pa.s.sing through the trees, but it was not enough to feel fear. If you just played, you laughed, apologize if you get angry, make it a secret between close friends when you go home.
Your friendships will end in due time, but do not end them yourself.
TN Corner:
Thank you to Reichel Anne Roxas for giving me two coffees!!!
And thank you all for your comments! I love hearing back from you all ❤
Also, Sashia you are being depressing af my dude.