Our Journey

"Are you still angry?" My father asked casually as if he hadn"t made a mistake. I glared at him. I bit my own lips to hold myself from talking to him. However, I can"t hold myself back anymore.

"Father, why did you decide everything without discussing it with me?" I asked him. He sighed. Slowly he poured tea into the cup and gave it to me.

"If I discuss it with you then you will refuse my invitation to meet Bixia," my father explained his reason. I know his words are true. I won"t want to see Bixia if I know my father"s intentions.
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"This marriage must occur. This is the best decision for you," my father said firmly. I can"t accept his word.

"Father, since my Gege (brother) and my mother were died, you don"t care about me. Why now you decide that this is the best for me?" I let go of my anger at him. He looked at me grimly.

"I know. Since the death of your gege and your mother, I am lost in sadness and do not care about you. When I know that you"re hurt, I don"t stop regretting my att.i.tude to you," my father said in a soft voice as if speaking to himself. I am sad to hear his words. He realized that he had ignored me all this time.

"If you feel that way, why did you bring this problem to Bixia? Why don"t you respect my decision to be a anch.o.r.ess? Father, I don"t like Zhiqiang w.a.n.gye. He is the man who hurt me. You knows, isn"t it?" I railed him with my words. My father twirled his cup and drank the contents.

"Do you remember Bixia"s words to you? He said that you should think of me, right?" My father turned to ask. I wrinkled my forehead because it didn"t understands his words. Even so, I still nodded my head because Bixia did say that to me.

"If you become a anch.o.r.ess and live with your teacher, can I meet you often?" He asked again and I was forced to answer. I shaking my head slowly.

"When we meet, can I act as a father to you? If you become a anch.o.r.ess, you must break your relationship with the world. You have to hold back your feelings when you meet me," my father said and sighed.

"I don"t care if you stay angry and didn"t want to forgive me, my daughter. This is my selfishness as your parent. I don"t want to lose my other child," my father finished his words. After heard his words, I feel sad. Finally I found out that my father loved me, but why in a situation like this?

"I don"t love him. She does not love me. If he likes other women, he will make him as his wife too. Wouldn"t I suffer if I married him?" I asked in a soft voice. I remember the love story of Zhiqiang w.a.n.gye. He loves Xiaoying. After meeting her, he would definitely marry Xiaoying.

"Love will only make you suffer, Liu Fang. Look what happened to me after your mother died? I an really wanted to catch up with her into the world of death. I even ignored you because of my sadness," my father said and drank the tea.

"If you don"t love him, you won"t feel a broken heart. After all, you will marry him as the main wife. He will not do anything bad to you because of your status, "

"Father, it"s still a sad life,"

"However, father can meet you often than if you being a anch.o.r.ess,"

"If you want to meet me often, I don"t need to get married. I will accompany father forever!"

"Are you crazy? If you are not married, after I die you will be lonely! "

"At that time, I will be a anch.o.r.ess. Aren"t I going to have friends there? "

"Bixia has decided to marry you off to Zhiqiang w.a.n.gye. Even though you don"t like it. Even though you oppose it. You have to marry him," he said firmly.

"If you marry him, then I have fulfilled your mother"s last hope. He said to me if she wanted me to continue to live and see you married," my father closed our conversation and stood up. He left me in the gazebo. Seeing my father"s back, my heart is sad.

I know that my father loves my mother very much. He never took a concubine. As my father said, after my mother died, his life became increasingly chaotic. My father became an alcoholic and his health had worsened because of that.

After all this was Bixia"s decision. Opposing it is crime. Even though I don"t want it, I have to marry Zhiqiang w.a.n.gye.

What kind of marriage will I live?

***

"First bow to Heaven and Earth!"

"Second Bow to parents and elders!"

"Third Bow to each other!"

Word by word flowed from Eunuch"s mouth who became the leader of the wedding ritual. I wore red clothes and heavy crowns. Every time I put my body down, my head felt pulled down. The thing I hate the most is that I have to bend my body to Zhiqiang w.a.n.gye.

The man in front of me was the one who brought me into this disaster. I went to the Capital City not to get married. I came here to become an elite Kingdom force that would bring fame to my family. I went to this city to grant my brother"s dream. I went to the Capital City not to marry anyone!

But this is the reality that I have to face. A month after meeting Bixia, I married Zhiqiang w.a.n.gye. Rituals and banquets are held at Zhiqiang w.a.n.gfu.

"After this, please the bride and groom go to their red chamber," the eunuch spoke again. Everyone in this Hall laughed after hearing his words. My ears became hot to hear their laughter.

I walked slowly away from the hall. Meiling and an elderly female servant led me to a room. The room is decorated with wedding ornaments. I sat on the edge of the bed. I am waiting for the arrival of Zhiqiang w.a.n.gye.

Long enough I waited, my bedroom door opened. From behind the red veil covering my face, I saw Zhiqiang w.a.n.gye enter the room. He closed the door then walked towards me. He stood before me. His face looked grim.

"I hit you once and I had to pay it with marrying you," he said. I can smell alcohol. he had drunk a lot of alcohol.

He walked to the table in the room. Pour wine into two bowls.

"Should we drink nuptual wine?" He asked me. I know that he is mocking me. I sighed. I opened the red veil that covered my face. I walked towards him. I looked at him sharply.

"I don"t think we need to pretend to be husband and wife here. Do whatever you want to do!" I spoke firmly to him. He paused for a moment then chuckled.

"You are a small cat who is not afraid of anything. You are really not my ideal woman," he said after laughing. I sighed. I"m tired of hearing his words about his ideal women. Who care about that?

"I am is I am. I"m not your ideal woman.

So?"

"I can"t love you," he said again with a serious face. I nodded my head and smiled.

"I don"t love you too," I replied honestly.

"You sleep on the bed. I sleep under," I said while taking my crown off carefully. I put my crown on the table. Then I took a blanket and spread it on the floor. I immediately lay on the blanket.

He walked to bed and slept on it.

"What kind of marriage is this?" He suddenly asked.

"I do not know!"

"Now you are my main wife. You are Benw.a.n.gfei (My Princess Consort). Are you happy with your status now?" he asked to mocking me. I sighed.

"Not. I want to be a general. Not being Princess Consort. If you didn"t almost kill me before, this won"t happen, "

"Do you want to be a general? You don"t like the status of w.a.n.gfei?" He asked.

"Yes. Why?" I asked, I feel annoyed. His voice is like underestimating me. Suddenly he laughed. He sat down and looked at me.

"This marriage is not a bad thing," he said. I don"t understand his words. I sit.

"What do you mean?"

"Do you want to be a general? I will help you achieve fame in the Military! l" He smiled.

"Then you!" He pointed at my face.

"When I met Xiaoying, you must accept her in this w.a.n.gfu and respect her. If she is here, even if she can only become my Concubine, she will have power as a w.a.n.gfei," he said cheerfully. I looked at his sparkling eyes.

"How?" He asked me. I took his hand and held it.

"Agree!" I answered confidently.