"No. Sorry, but can"t possibly."
"Please think it over."
"No, no, no, no, dear! You go and forget me and enjoy yourself and be good to your pink-face--Nelly, isn"t it? She seems to be terribly nice, and I know you two will have a good party. You must forget me. I"m just a teacher of playing games who hasn"t been successful at any game whatever. Not that it matters.
I don"t care. I don"t, really. Now, good night."
CHAPTER XVIII
AND FOLLOWS A WANDERING FLAME THROUGH PERILOUS SEAS
They had picnic dinner early up there on the Palisades:
Nelly and Mr. Wrenn, Mrs. Arty and Tom, Miss Proudfoot and Mrs.
Samuel Ebbitt, the last of whom kept ejaculating: "Well! I ain"t run off like this in ten years!" They squatted about a red-cotton table-cloth spread on a rock, broadly discussing the sandwiches and cold chicken and lemonade and stuffed olives, and laughing almost to a point of distress over Tom"s accusation that Miss Proudfoot had secreted about her person a bottle of rye whisky.
Nelly was very pleasant to Mr. Wrenn, but she called him neither Billy nor anything else, and mostly she talked to Miss Proudfoot, smiling at him, but saying nothing when he managed to get out a jest about Mrs. Arty"s chewing-gum. When he moved to her side with a wooden plate of cream-cheese sandwiches (which Tom humorously termed "cold-cream wafers") Mr. Wrenn started to explain how he had come to enter Istra"s room.
"Why shouldn"t you?" Nelly asked, curtly, and turned to Miss Proudfoot.
"She doesn"t seem to care much," he reflected, relieved and stabbed in his humble vanity and reattracted to Nelly, all at once. He was anxious about her opinion of Istra and her opinion of himself, and slightly defiant, as she continued to regard him as a respectable person whose name she couldn"t exactly remember.
Hadn"t he the right to love Istra if he wanted to? he desired to know of himself. Besides, what had he _done?_ Just gone out walking with his English hotel acquaintance Istra! He hadn"t been in her room but just a few minutes. Fine reason that was for Nelly to act like a blooming iceberg! Besides, it wasn"t as if he were engaged to Nelly, or anything like that.
Besides, of course Istra would never care for him. There were several other besideses with which he harrowed himself while trying to appear picnically agreeable. He was getting very much confused, and was slightly abrupt as he said to Nelly, "Let"s walk over to that high rock on the edge."
A dusky afterglow filled the sky before them as they silently trudged to the rock and from the top of the sheer cliff contemplated the smooth and steely-gray Hudson below. Nelly squeaked her fear at the drop and clutched his arm, but suddenly let go and drew back without his aid.
He groaned within, "I haven"t the right to help her." He took her arm as she hesitatingly climbed from the rock down to the ground.
She jerked it free, curtly saying, "No, thank you."
She was repentant in a moment, and, cheerfully:
"Miss Nash took me in her room yesterday and showed me her things. My, she"s got such be-_yoo_-ti-ful jewels! La V"lieres and pearls and a swell amethyst brooch. My! She told me all about how the girls used to study in Paris, and how sorry she would be to go back to California and keep house."
"Keep house?"
Nelly let him suffer for a moment before she relieved him with, "For her father."
"Oh.... Did she say she was going back to California soon?"
"Not till the end of the summer, maybe."
"Oh.... Oh, Nelly--"
For the first time that day he was perfectly sincere. He was trying to confide in her. But the shame of having emotions was on him. He got no farther.
To his amazement, Nelly mused, "She is very nice."
He tried hard to be gallant. "Yes, she is interesting, but of course she ain"t anywheres near as nice as you are, Nelly, be--"
"Oh, don"t, Billy!"
The quick agony in her voice almost set them both weeping. The shared sorrow of separation drew them together for a moment.
Then she started off, with short swift steps, and he tagged after. He found little to say. He tried to comment on the river. He remarked that the apartment-houses across in New York were bright in the sunset; that, in fact, the upper windows looked "like there was a fire in there." Her sole comment was "Yes."
When they rejoined the crowd he was surprised to hear her talking volubly to Miss Proudfoot. He rejoiced that she was "game," but he did not rejoice long. For a frightened feeling that he had to hurry home and see Istra at once was turning him weak and cold. He didn"t want to see her; she was intruding; but he had to go--go at once; and the agony held him all the way home, while he was mechanically playing the part of stern reformer and agreeing with Tom Poppins that the horrors of the recent Triangle shirt-waist-factory fire showed that "something oughta be done--something sure oughta be."
He trembled on the ferry till Nelly, with a burst of motherly tenderness in her young voice, suddenly asked: "Why, you"re shivering dreadfully! Did you get a chill?"
Naturally, he wanted the credit of being known as an invalid, and pitied and nursed, but he reluctantly smiled and said, "Oh no, it ain"t anything at all."
Then Istra called him again, and he fumed over the slowness of their landing.
And, at home, Istra was out.
He went resolutely down and found Nelly alone, sitting on a round pale-yellow straw mat on the steps.
He sat by her. He was very quiet; not at all the jovial young man of the picnic properly following the boarding-house-district rule that males should be jocular and show their appreciation of the ladies by "kidding them." And he spoke with a quiet graciousness that was almost courtly, with a note of weariness and spiritual experience such as seldom comes into the boarding-houses, to slay joy and bring wisdom and give words shyness.
He had, as he sat down, intended to ask her to go with him to a moving-picture show. But inspiration was on him. He merely sat and talked.
When Mr. Wrenn returned from the office, two evenings later, he found this note awaiting him:
DEAR MOUSE,--Friend has asked me to join her in studio & have beat it. Sorry not see you & say good-by. Come see me sometime--phone before and see if I"m in--Spring x.x.x--address xx South Washington Sq. In haste, ISTRA.
He spent the evening in not going to the studio. Several times he broke away from a pinochle game to rush upstairs and see if the note was as chilly as he remembered. It always was.
Then for a week he awaited a more definite invitation from her, which did not come. He was uneasily polite to Nelly these days, and tremulously appreciative of her gentleness. He wanted to brood, but he did not take to his old habit of long solitary walks. Every afternoon he planned one for the evening; every evening found that he "wanted to be around with folks."
He had a sort of youthful defiant despair, so he jested much at the card-table, by way of practising his new game of keeping people from knowing what he was thinking. He took sophisticated pleasure in noting that Mrs. Arty no longer condescended to him.
He managed to imitate Tom"s writing on a card which he left with a bunch of jonquils in Nelly"s room, and nearly persuaded even Tom himself that Tom was the donor. Probably because he didn"t much care what happened he was able to force Mr. Mortimer R.
Guilfogle to raise his salary to twenty-three dollars a week.
Mr. Guilfogle went out of his way to admit that the letters to the Southern trade had been "a first-rate stunt, son."
John Henson, the head of the Souvenir Company"s manufacturing department, invited Mr. Wrenn home to dinner, and the account of the cattle-boat was much admired by Mrs. Henson and the three young Hensons.
A few days later, in mid-June, there was an unusually cheerful dinner at the boarding-house. Nelly turned to Mr. Wrenn--yes, he was quite sure about it; she was speaking exclusively to him, with a lengthy and most merry account of the manner in which the floor superintendent had "called down" the unkindest of the aislesmen.