I sighed. "I think it hurts him more pretending that his brother didn"t exist. From what he said it sounds like he benefits from talking about it."
Caeden rubbed his face. "If he wants to talk about it he can. No one"s stopping him."
"No one"s encouraging him either," I mumbled.
Caeden groaned. "Why are we even talking about this?"
"Because Bentley"s your best friend and even though ten years have gone by he"s obviously hurting. He doesn"t think he deserves happiness or love. Is that what you want for him? A life of loneliness?" I asked.
"Sophie," said Caeden. "What"s really going on here?" he asked moving towards me and putting his arms around me.
I gulped and tried to dam the tears back. My breath came out strangled. I couldn"t help it. I wanted to put on a brave face but that wasn"t possible. Not anymore. "I"m scared," I whispered so low I wasn"t sure he heard me. I knew that Travis and the Grimm"s were cold, hardened, people. I knew they wouldn"t hesitate to kill me if the opportunity presented itself again. But any ounce of humanity that I may have thought them capable to possess was gone. Travis had killed a five year old boy when he was just a boy himself. He was a s.a.d.i.s.tic, coldblooded, sociopath. His dad was just the same. I didn"t know Robert or Hannah but I was pretty sure they were rowing the same boat. Especially Robert, if he had witnessed Travis kill Sam and not tried to stop it he was just as much at fault. How much blood was on their hands? Sam"s we knew. Maybe Roger"s. Almost mine. Who else had suffered at their cruel hands?
Silence greeted me. I could feel his muscles working beneath his shirt as he held me close. He rested his chin on top of my head. I thought he might never answer but finally he did. "Me too," he said. "I hate to admit but I"m scared too. I can"t let them get to you again. They"ve already caused so much damage. For years they"ve tormented us. We"ve always stood in the background letting them do as they please. The council won"t let them continue much longer. Their days are limited. I can guarantee you that. But until then we"re all in danger."
"Will you teach me to fight?" I asked. "Once I shift will you teach me to protect myself?"
"Of course," he said. "But it won"t be necessary because I"m not going to be letting you out of my sight."
I groaned. "That"s really going to get old," I said.
He pulled away from me and held his hands in the air like he was weighing something. "Keep Sophie safe or let Sophie die. Hmm. I think keep Sophie safe is winning. So, bite me."
"Gladly," I chuckled and he pulled me into a kiss.
The bell over the door dinged signaling a customer.
Caeden groaned. "And just when I was going to have my wicked way with you."
I laughed and finished icing the cupcakes while he went to deal with the customer. I only hoped that once I shifted that I would be strong. Strong enough to protect the both of us. Strong enough to protect the pack. It was time I picked up my slack.
I pulled on my yellow and blue plaid pajama pants and a random t-shirt that I pulled out of the drawer. I yawned and greatly looked forward to getting in the bed. I was so tired I was practically dead on my feet. Archie was already sending out a pleasant little snore from his spot on my bed.
"Come on Archie, move," I said trying to slide the little dog over so I could climb in my bed. But he was stubborn and didn"t want to budge. "Alright, no more Mr. Nice Guy," I said and picked him up and scooted him over. He gave me an angry little snort and then fell back to sleep. "Well," I said to the little dog. "You wouldn"t do it the easy way so it had to be the hard way. It"s your own fault."
I climbed in the bed and pulled up the purple bedspread. The only thing I had taken the time to change in the room. Despite Gram giving me her a.s.surance that I could change everything it just didn"t seem right. This was her home after all. I reached over to the nightstand and plunged the room into darkness.
I rolled over on my side and closed my eyes. I was just about to drift off when I heard a wolf howling in the distance. At first I was startled. Picturing Travis coming to find me but I quickly recognized it as Caeden. I wasn"t sure how I knew it was him but I did. I wanted to howl back, it was like my wolf wanted to answer to his, and I hadn"t even shifted yet.
I heard a scratching at my window which startled me so much that fell unceremoniously out of my bed and landed on my b.u.t.t. "Ow," I said and then heard the scratching again. My heart leaped to my throat. That scratching was on purpose. Nothing around Gram"s house would make that noise.
I automatically pictured a gleeful Travis standing outside my window ready to wrap his hands around my throat and squeeze the life out of me. Maybe Caeden"s howl had been a warning?
I was about to tiptoe out of my room to find Gram when I heard, "Sophie, it"s me. Open the window."
Caeden. Air rushed back into my lungs and I was grateful for the relief it provided.
I opened my window as quietly as I could. "Are you crazy?" I hissed at him as he climbed in my window.
"Maybe," he replied with a shrug of his shoulders.
"What are you doing here?" I whispered.
"Well," he said, "this would have been your first night away from me since we found you and I told you that I wasn"t going to let you out of my sight. So, here I am."
"Does Gram know?"
He gave me a funny look. "I just came in through the window and you"re asking me if Lucinda knows? That would be a big fat no." He huffed, "And it took you long enough to go to bed. I thought that light was never going to turn off."
"So, what was your plan? To scare me half to death?"
"No," he said holding up a duffel bag. "My plan was to sleep. Look, I brought Jammies."
I groaned. "Caeden, if Gram finds out she"ll skin us both alive and sell our hairy pelts."
He chuckled. "You don"t think I know that? I just couldn"t stand the thought of being away from you. Plus," he said and blushed, "I get the best sleep when you"re in my arms."
I wanted to make some kind of joke but couldn"t because he was right. I had my best sleep when I was with him. The wonders of being mates would never cease to amaze me.
"Alright fine," I conceded. "I"m tired so hurry up," I said turning around so he could change.
I heard the sound of the zipper and then of clothes being shed. Despite not seeing anything a blush still crept up my neck and to my cheeks.
"Done," he said. "And thanks for this."
I shook my head and turned around. "Don"t thank me. I feel the same way. I don"t like being away from you."
He pulled me into his arms and dragged me into the bed covering us with the comforter. "I like your pajamas," he whispered against my ear, tickling the sensitive skin.
I blushed. "Sorry, I know they"re not very girly. Or... flattering at all for that matter."
He chuckled lightly. "No, they"re cute, really. They"re like you, practical."
I smacked his arm. "Practical?"
He smiled and from the dim light of the moon I could see his dimple in his cheek. "You"re not fussy," he clarified. "You like the simple things. It"s one of the things I admire the most about you."
"Well, when you put it like that..." I said. "I guess it"s okay."
He twisted a strand of my multi-hued brown hair around his finger. "Sophie, if we keep talking we"re never going to get to sleep and we do have school tomorrow."
"Oh right," I said.
He began to hum some random song that quickly lulled me to sleep. With Caeden there I knew that no bad dreams, nothing bad at all, would happen to me. He was my protector. My warrior. My mate. My destiny.
seventeen.
The day had come. It was here. My birthday. My shift. The day my life would change forever. I didn"t know whether to be excited, scared, elated, or terrified. b.u.t.terflies viciously attacked my churning stomach. It was Friday but Caeden and I weren"t going to school today. He said it would take a couple of days to get used to the shift so I was even more thankful of the weekend than I normally was. I didn"t want to go into school Monday as a big, hulking, s.h.a.ggy wolf.
I hoped shifting would come as naturally to me as Caeden claimed it would. I hated the thought of being a defected wolf. A part of me thought that I may not shift at all. That maybe since I was finding out about this so late it wouldn"t happen for me. But deep down I knew that wasn"t true.
Over the last two weeks had already begun experiencing changes. My vision was clearer, my hearing tuned, and I could smell things I hadn"t been able to smell before. Caeden told me it would get worse once I changed. Actually his word had been "better". I wasn"t sure if I could get used to this clarity. It was strange, eerie, to see, smell, and hear things you know you shouldn"t. And to think that I wasn"t even at the level that Caeden and the others were at.
He rolled over and cracked his eyes open, a sliver of blue showing through. He had shown up every night since the first. I was used to it now and couldn"t imagine it any other way. Although, I had taken it upon myself to get some new pajamas. Ones that were a little more feminine and didn"t possess holes.
"Hey," he said yawning. "What time is it?"
I chuckled and looked at the clock. "Time for you to go. Gram will be up any minute."
"Why didn"t you wake me up?" he said jumping out of the bed and pulling his jeans on over his pajama bottoms. He threw a sweatshirt on over his t-shirt and leaned down to press a light kiss to my lips. "I"ll be back in an hour," he said starting towards my window.
"Don"t forget to use the front door," I joked.
"Ha, ha," he mocked and ducked out the window.
I grabbed some clothes and headed into the bathroom to get a shower before Gram woke up.
I turned the nozzle so that the water was as hot as I could stand it. I climbed in and let the hot stream beat the tension out of the coiled knots of my back. I felt like every muscle in my body was a tight coiled spring ready to release at any moment. It was as if my muscles were preparing for my wolf form to emerge. I squeezed the pink goo of my shampoo into my hand and lathered my head until I couldn"t take it anymore. The scent of strawberries invaded my nostrils. I gaged from the smell. My shampoo had never smelled that strong before. I scrubbed my body with my mango scent body wash and the same thing happened. The scent of mango and strawberry mingling together nearly knocked me down. I rinsed my hair and my body off. As the bubbles ran down the drain some of the smell went with it. The water was now cold and giving me the shivers so I climbed out and wrapped a fluffy towel around me. I pulled out the hair dryer and turned it up as hot as it would go. I didn"t know what Caeden had in store today but I didn"t want to spend any time outside with wet hair. I pulled on my jeans, a sweatshirt, and put my hair back in its standard ponytail.
Gram was coming out of her room just as I was leaving the bathroom. She smiled at me, "Today"s the big day."
I tried to smile but I was pretty sure it came out more as a grimace. "Yeah," I said.
She gave me a sad smile. "There"s nothing to worry about Sophie. I went through my transformation by myself and so have the others for as long as we can remember. You"ll have Caeden with you. You"re lucky," she said patting my hand. "Come on; let me make you a breakfast before you disappear."
I followed her into the kitchen and in no time she had my plate piled high with toast, eggs, and bacon.
"How am I supposed to eat all of this?" I asked.
"You transform tonight. You need your strength. Now eat," she demanded.
The doorbell rang and she went to answer it. She returned with Caeden and promptly made him a plate too.
His hair was still slightly damp. He wore a hunter green V-neck sweater that hugged all of his muscles. A white t-shirt peeked out underneath when he moved. He was far too perfect. I quickly averted my gaze before either he or Gram noticed the drool pooling in the corner of my mouth. Before he started eating he leaned over and kissed my cheek. "Happy Birthday, baby," he said.
"Thanks," I said with a small smile.
"Are you ready for tonight," he asked while his hands drummed an odd beat on the table.
"I can"t wait," I said sarcastically. "Doesn"t every eighteen year old girl want a wolf to rip out of her skin?"
He chuckled and shoveled a spoonful of eggs into his mouth. "You"ll be fine," he said.
"You usually the word "fine" implies anything but," I retorted.
"You have an answer for everything don"t you?" he asked as Gram sat down to join us.
"Definitely," I said and then laughed, "how else do you when an argument?" I took a bite of crunchy, b.u.t.ter drenched toast, and said, "So, what"s the plan for today?"
"Well," said Caeden swallowing, "not much. I know today"s your birthday and I"d like to do something special but since tonight is your first shift I don"t think that"s going to be possible."
"As long as I"m with you it will be special," I said.
He grinned and his dimple peaked out briefly.
Gram chuckled and jumped up. "Sophie, I made you a cake. It"s your fav-o-rite!" she sing songed. She pulled out a gla.s.s covered cake from the refrigerator and sat it on the table in front of me. The scent of chocolate and peanut b.u.t.ter invaded my senses. I could practically taste it on my tongue.
"Yum!" I said, already salivating.
The two tiered cake was slathered in a thick coating of peanut b.u.t.ter frosting and "Happy 18th Birthday, Sophie," was written on it in chocolate frosting. Gram had even taken the time to sketch a wolf howling at the moon in the frosting as well.
"I know its morning but from the look on your face I"m a.s.suming you want a piece now?" she asked.
"Yes please," I said shaking my head enthusiastically.
Gram chuckled and grabbed a couple of plates and a cake cutter.
"Wait!" said Caeden.
Gram paused in her actions. "What?" she asked.
"Sophie, has to make a wish first," he said as if it would be the end of the world if I didn"t blow out some candles.
Gram shook her head. "How silly of me to forget," she said. She turned around and began digging around in a drawer. She found a box of neon colored candles and proceeded to stick them in the cake. Gram pulled a lighter out of another drawer and lit each candle.
She and Caeden broke into a very loud, very obnoxious, very, very, very, off-key version of the "Happy Birthday" song. I was glad no one else was there to partake in my complete and utter embarra.s.sment. I puffed out my cheeks and blew out the candles making a wish in the process.
"Cake time!" said Caeden patting his flat stomach.
"Is there room in there?" I quipped.
He grinned. "There"s always room for cake," he said.
"Of course," I replied just as Gram put a plate of cake in front of me. I took a bite and moaned in ecstasy. "I swear," I said pointing at the cake with my fork, "that world peace could be accomplished based just on Gram"s baking."
She chuckled. "I"m not sure about that."
"Oh definitely," I replied. "Nothing in the world can compare to your cakes. It"s like heaven in a confectionary." I went to take a second bite and saw that the only thing on Caeden"s plate were a few chocolate crumbs. "Really?" I asked. "That quick? That has to be a record."
He patted his flat stomach and said, "Maybe I should join an eating compet.i.tion?"
"You"d definitely win," I commented. "I"ve never seen anyone put away as much food as you can. I"m just waiting for you to swallow a cow hole. Now that is as an accomplishment."
He chuckled. "I"d try that but I don"t think my jaw is big enough to accomplish that feat," he said.
"Snakes do it," I said.