b.u.t.t in the lawn chair, laptop on his knees, Steve slid his sleeves a little higher so he could type unenc.u.mbered. Not that he was typing all that much; three girls were also taking advantage of what might be the year’s last sunny day to stretch themselves out on a blanket laid upon the gra.s.s. They all looked to be in their midtwenties, about Steve’s age. His eyes kept flicking away from his screen’s engineering reports and oceanographic research to the girls, to their long hair, to their tan skin gleaming with oil.
He ached to talk to them. But those kinds of girls didn’t want a guy like him. Girls like that wanted the captain of the football team, not the captain of the chess club. Girls like that didn’t care that he’d earned two doctorates before he’d turned twenty-one, could have earned at least another three if he hadn’t been forced to keep his discoveries secret.
And anyway, those kind of girls didn’t go for first-generation Chinese American nerds. As smart as he was, talking to women made him feel stupid. It made him feel small.
The girls back at Berkeley had liked him. Well, not girls who looked like that, but at least they were girls. Here in Benton Harbor, Michigan? Women wouldn’t give him the time of day, let alone their phone numbers.
For all Steve’s brilliance, he was wasting away in this s.h.i.t hole of a town in a s.h.i.t hole of a state, waiting for a moment to serve his people and his country — a moment that was never going to come. He couldn’t use his education, his rather significant set of skills, couldn’t do anything that might draw attention. Not until the Ministry of State Security decided there was nothing in Lake Michigan worth finding.
His eyes followed the curve of the middle girl’s a.s.s, took in the smooth skin, the way the sun kicked off a soft reflection from the curve’s apex.
She looked up, caught him staring. He turned away instantly, tapped random keys on his keyboard, focusing on the screen like it was the only thing in the world. He heard the girl laugh. Just her, at first, then the other two.
He felt smaller than ever.
A trickle of sweat rolled down his temple, but he knew the heat wouldn’t last. Weather.com said the first big fall storm was on the way in. Early effects were due in about a half an hour. The encroaching front would soon chase away the girls with the long legs and tight b.u.t.ts, while Steve would be nice and warm in his heavier clothes. By tonight, everything would be freezing and wet.
Why did people live in Michigan, anyway? Winters full of cold and snow. Trees shed leaves that turned into a brown paste on the roads. When the summer finally came, it brought with it sweltering, cloying humidity that seemed to suck the sweat right out of your body.
He wanted out of this washed-up excuse of a small city, wanted to leave this frigid state for good, to go somewhere the sun never hid behind clouds or vanished for weeks on end. He wanted to go back to Cali, to Berkeley. He had friends there, people who understood him. And if he couldn’t go back to California, he wanted to go to his real home.
He wanted to see China for the first time, experience the nation of his people, see where his parents and ancestors had come from. Even his last name — Stanton — that wasn’t his. The MSS had ordered his parents to change their names when they arrived in America. More for his sake than theirs, as it helped establish their son as just another American boy.
What Steve wanted never seemed to matter, though. The MSS wouldn’t let him go to China. Not that he ever talked to anyone who was actually from the MSS — just their messengers, their errand boys.
So warm. Steve’s eyelids drooped. Maybe the girls stopped laughing at him, maybe he just dozed off.
A shadow fell across his face.
Steve looked up to see a wrinkled old man looking down at him. Well, if it wasn’t the MMS’s main messenger.
“Bo Pan,” Steve said. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”
Bo Pan nodded once.
Steve sighed. “You’re blocking my sun.”
Bo Pan looked down, realized he was casting a shadow. He quickly stepped to the left.
“Sorry, sorry,” the man said.
Bo Pan wore secondhand jeans, secondhand sneakers and a Detroit Lions sweatshirt that was probably third-hand, if not fourth. With wispy hair around the temples of a bald head, and eyes that were deeply slanted even by Chinese standards, Bo Pan didn’t look like a threat to anything but the gra.s.s on some rich white dude’s lawn.
Steve sat up, turned, put his feet on the spa.r.s.e, cool gra.s.s and packed dirt. “There’s nothing new to report. But you know that. Here to check up on me?”
Bo Pan shook his head. He looked out at the river, squinted at the sun, then took in Steve’s chair.
The old man frowned. “You look comfortable. Are you enjoying yourself?”
Steve smiled. “I am, actually. It’s a beautiful day for a pimp like me.”
Bo Pan’s mouth pursed in confusion. For someone who had spent decades living in America, he understood little of the culture and none of the lingo.
“Do your mother and father know it’s a beautiful day? I saw them working away in the restaurant.”
Bo Pan hadn’t come around in, what … three months? Three months without a peep, and the first thing he had to communicate was a guilt trip?
Steve eased back in his chair. He took his time, milking the motion just to annoy Bo Pan.
“My mother and father don’t need me today.”
“You are lazy,” Bo Pan said. “You have grown up like them.”
Like them: like an American.