"I can teach her," Nick volunteered quickly. He loved the idea. "We could do a waltz together on horseback. I"ll need to work with my horses for a while. We can do something simple in the meantime. I think it"s a wonderful suggestion." Nick was ecstatic, they talked about it with him for a while, then left North"s office in a daze. It seemed providential. It was the perfect opportunity to be together for shows and rehearsals. They had six weeks to learn the act North wanted, before they left on tour.
"Wow, I thought we were in trouble," Christianna said with a giggle that made her seem even younger than she was.
"We will be if we don"t come up with a good act for him. Leave that to me. I"ll start thinking about it today." It took Nick six days to ch.o.r.eograph a routine that his horses were able to execute, and that was simple enough for Christianna to follow. Nick rehea.r.s.ed it with her a week after they"d seen North. And they had time to work on it before they opened at Madison Square Garden. It was still rough, but it worked, and with practice, once set to music, it would be elegant and romantic. Nick could hardly wait to perfect their new act and perform it in New York. He knew the audience would love it.
They rehea.r.s.ed diligently every day, and by the time they left for New York at the beginning of April, Christianna looked like an angel on Athena"s back. She was nervous at first, but she had exceptionally good balance, for obvious reasons, and she managed to stand on the Lipizzaner"s back for part of the routine that Nick had designed, and was comfortable in the saddle the rest of the time, riding beside Nick on Pegasus, the two horses moving in split-second precision around the ring. Nick was thrilled with how far they"d gotten with the new routine, and Christianna learned quickly. And she had gotten better every day. They still made mistakes, but very, very few, and none the crowd would see. And he loved doing it with her. John North had been right-it added a measure of elegance and excitement to Nick"s act. He could hardly wait to try it out in front of an audience. They were both excited about it when he walked her back to her trailer, the night before they left Sarasota. And they ran into her father and brothers and younger sister when they finished their rehearsal. Nick greeted them politely, chatted with her brothers for a few minutes, and then left to get back to his boys. Like everyone else, he still had a lot to do before they left the next morning.
The day they left Sarasota to begin touring, later than usual this year, everyone was excited to leave, and Lucas thought it was the most exciting day of his life. The big cats were loaded onto the train, along with the elephants and other animals. Nick loaded all his horses in a trailer early that morning after feeding and watering them. There were roustabouts and handlers on the train to feed the animals and tend to their needs. Many of the performers were taking the train, but some were driving their trailers, as Christianna"s family was planning to do, and Nick with his boys, following the train. The big equipment was being transported by rail and a fleet of trucks. It looked like the whole town was leaving, which was nearly true, and it would be eight or nine months before they returned, after touring the country, stopping in small towns along the way, and occasional big ones, usually for only one night, and rarely for more than two days, except when they opened in New York, where they always spent four weeks at the beginning of their tour. And everyone loved performing at "the Garden" because the conditions there were so good.
Nick had been told the tour would be grueling, but his boys didn"t care. And they were looking forward to being in New York for almost a month. Toby had asked to ride with Katja"s family, and Rosie was going to travel the first day with Lucas and Nick. It seemed a fair trade.
Nick stopped briefly to see Christianna before they left. It would be many hours, or even the next day, before he could see her again. She was wearing a white cotton sundress and dance shoes that were too worn for the high wire. He gave her a quick kiss before they took off. Her brothers and sister were already waiting for her in their trailer, and her father and aunt were taking the train.
"My brothers are getting suspicious," she whispered as he kissed her again. They had been talking lately about saying something to them, but they were both sure there would be a reaction. His presence in her life, and his concern for her well-being was a huge threat to them. And they weren"t pleased that John Ringling North wanted her to perform with him. They thought it diluted the impact of her own act later in the show. According to them, high-wire artists didn"t perform on horses like acrobats. But North was the president of the circus, and as Christianna pointed out to her brothers, his word was law, and they had to agree. And Nick and Christianna were delighted at the legitimate excuse to work together and no one could object. And the act that Nick had designed for them was beautiful and artistic.
"See you later," he whispered after a last kiss and hurried off, and she was smiling as she got into the trailer and they started on the long journey to New York.
They had been driving for several hours when her oldest brother, Peter, asked her about Nick.
"What"s going on with you two?" he inquired as he took a bite of an apple. Their little sister, Mina, was asleep next to him on the couch. And their three other brothers were taking turns driving. Their wives had gone on the train to take care of their aunt and father-in-law.
"Nothing. Why?" She had never lied to him before, but she didn"t want to share what was happening with Nick. She wasn"t ready to yet. What they had belonged to them, and she felt loyal to Nick, and wanted to protect him, and herself. "We"ve been working on the act Mr. North wants us to do."
"And what else?" Her brother was smiling at her. "You can tell me," he pried with a knowing look. He always treated her like a child, no different than her thirteen-year-old sister.
"There"s nothing to tell. He"s a nice man. We"re friends. I like his boys."
"They"re more your age than he is. He"s old enough to be your father, Christianna. I hope you realize that."
"There"s nothing going on," she repeated with a cold look. She didn"t like being pushed, and she got on less well with her older brother than the others. He was too much like their father and had old-fashioned ideas about their act. And he was jealous, and always had been, that she was the star of the high wire. He had always wanted to take their father"s place, but he was heavy-set, and the audience liked watching Christianna better. She was a lot prettier to look at, and steadier on the wire. Peter had fallen off the low wire many times. And none of her sisters-in-law had ever performed with them. They were just part of the entourage, and several of them were jealous of her, too, especially Peter"s wife. Christianna was wary of them both.
"Well, don"t get any ideas about him, just because he looks good on a horse. He"ll throw you away in five minutes, and he won"t be here long. I know his type. Some fancy aristocrat with a t.i.tle, down on his luck, so he joins the circus with his horses to bail himself out. As soon as he does, he"ll be gone. And don"t let him make you believe anything else." Christianna didn"t think he"d be there long either, but for different reasons. He deserved a better life than this, and wasn"t suited to it, even if he was a good sport about it. He had long since told her why he had left Germany and what he was doing there, but she couldn"t imagine him staying either, once Germany returned to normal, which they all felt sure it would one day. The current insanity, under Hitler, couldn"t last forever.
And if he didn"t go back to Germany, Nick talked about breeding horses one day, Lipizzaners, maybe on a ranch. He didn"t have the money for it now, but maybe he would in time, while Pegasus was still young enough to breed. There was plenty of time for that, the stallion would live for another twenty-five years. But it was his dream. And in twenty-five years, Nick would be the right age to retire. She would have to leave the high wire long before that, no matter how good she was now. She could do it for another ten or twelve years, if she was lucky. And then Mina would have to take over, or someone else. But at least she and Nick could dream. For now, it was all she had.
"Has he said anything to you?" Peter asked persistently, as he finished the apple and tossed the core out the window of the trailer, while looking intently at her.
"Why should he? All we do is work together, and I have a lot to learn." Peter nodded, satisfied for the moment. He wasn"t sure if he believed her. He had seen how Nick looked at her, especially when she was on the wire. Everything he felt for her was in his eyes. Peter was glad Christianna hadn"t noticed. It would only be trouble if she did, but he knew she was an innocent girl and never looked at men. Her brothers and father wouldn"t have been happy if she did. There were plenty of loose women in the circus, and he wouldn"t tolerate his sister being one of them, although he had been known to be enticed by them himself, unbeknownst to his wife. Christianna knew that her brothers all misbehaved with the circus women, but she was a girl, and they had different rules for her. She never let on to her brothers about what she saw or knew, or that she"d heard talk about them with other women. It was one of the reasons she was never interested in circus men. A lot of them played around and cheated on their wives.
"I"d say he has a lot more to learn than you do," Peter said disparagingly about Nick. "He has no idea what the circus is all about."
"He"s a decent man," she said coldly to her brother. "And a good father. And I"m sure he was kind to his wife." All of which was more than she could say for her brother, who slapped his wife around whenever he drank too much. It was common in the circus, both drink and bad treatment of their women, who got even with them by sleeping with other men. Christianna didn"t like their morality or values, or some of the games people played. She just did her work on the high wire, and took care of her father, aunt, and little sister. It was enough for her, or it had been until Nick arrived. Now she wanted more, with him. And he was so infinitely better than her brothers, such a gentleman, and so good to her. She couldn"t imagine ever being lucky enough to have a life with a man like him. In that, she knew her brother was right, and believed it herself. Despite his promises, she was sure that when Nick got back on his feet and had enough money saved, or when Germany got sane, he would leave the circus, and he wouldn"t be taking her. She could never fit into his real life. She was just a girl in the circus, but she was grateful to be in his life now. She was living their love from day to day.
"Just see that you don"t get any fancy ideas," her brother warned her, and then went up front to ride with the others, while Christianna lay on the couch with her sister and thought about Nick. And after a while, she fell asleep, dreaming of him.
Nick was having fun with Rosie and Lucas, playing guessing games with them along the way. The convoy of trailers and circus trucks seemed endless, as they wended their way north. Most of them drove late into the night, the riders taking turns driving. But Toby was too young to drive, so Nick usually did it all himself. He went to check on the horses when they made a stop, and they were doing fine. He made sure that they had enough water and feed, cleaned their trailer, and got back in the truck. Nick was thinking of Christianna and wished they could have traveled together. And he wanted to go and visit her when they stopped for the night. She had asked him not to before they left Sarasota, and he agreed. He was thinking about her when she suddenly appeared next to his trailer late that night.
"What are you doing here?" He looked happy to see her, and surprised. The boys were already asleep, and he"d been outside, smoking a last cigarette before he went to bed. The air was cool, and he was relaxing, thinking of her. "Did you escape?" he asked, and she nodded with a mischievous smile, and looked like a naughty child. He laughed with pleasure and pulled her into his arms to kiss her and hold her for a few minutes.
"Everyone"s asleep," she giggled, "my brothers drank too much when we stopped." It was a bad habit they had. And it had been a long boring day for them all.
"I wish we could just run away somewhere," he said longingly, as they sat next to each other on the trailer"s front step. There were a million stars in the sky, and they could hear murmurs and soft laughter in the distance, but for the most part, the trailers were quiet, and most of them were dark. It was late.
"Where would you run away to?" she asked with tender eyes. There was a sliver of moon overhead. "Back to Germany?"
He hesitated for a long moment. "I don"t know. It"s not a good place to be anymore. Back to the way it used to be, yes. Now, I don"t know where I"d go." He no longer had a country or a home. All he had now was a woman he loved, which suddenly seemed like a lot, and much more than he"d had before. He pulled her closer to him, and then smiled into her eyes that turned a deep ocean blue in the night. She was the most beautiful woman he"d ever known.
"Where would you go if you ran away?" he asked her, and she looked up at him so innocently that it tore at his heart.
"To you," she said simply. The answer seemed easy for her. He held her tight and closed his eyes, wishing that the world were different and he could give her what he"d once had. He had nothing to give her now, except his love.
They sat for a long time in silence and then she stirred. "I"d better go back, in case one of them wakes up." He wished for an instant that she could stay there with him, but there was no way that was possible, and his boys were with him.
He kissed her again, and she scampered off as silently as she had come. She was like a vision that he conjured up whenever he thought of her or needed her, and suddenly there she was, and then gone again, like a dream in the night.
And when she got back to her trailer, she could hear her brothers snoring, sprawled out in the living room and on the floor. She quietly slipped into her bedroom, put on her nightgown, and went to bed next to her sister, thinking of Nick.
The next morning they set off again at dawn, to travel the rest of the way to New York. They made it at nearly midnight, and from then on, the roustabouts worked hard, unloading equipment and setting things up. It was an enormous undertaking, which required nearly all the heavy manpower they had. The performers had nothing to do with it, but the roustabouts and handlers had a big job.
The cages had to be rolled into place for the first acts and the tunnel cages that led to them. The high wire, the trapezes, the poles, and the ropes all had to be put in place. They worked all night and into the next day, and some of the clowns helped. And they had to rehea.r.s.e after traveling for two days. The acrobats and gymnasts always complained of being stiff. The wardrobe mistresses had to organize costumes. There were a thousand things to do. And Nick and Toby had to exercise the horses before they rehea.r.s.ed. Pegasus was prancing the moment Nick got on his back, the young stallion was tired of being confined and excited to see Nick.
Once he had exercised Pegasus, Nick went to look for Christianna, and found her balancing on a low wire that had already been rigged. He had ridden one of his Arabian horses over to find her, and she looked happy to see him. She smiled the moment she did. She was alone.
"Do you have time to rehea.r.s.e with me?" he asked her, as she dropped off the wire easily and hopped to the ground.
"Sure. I just finished." They had put together a practice ring for the horses, and Nick had already arranged for rehearsal time between two other acts.
"Come on," he said with a warm look, and held out a hand to her. She took it, and he lifted her easily onto the horse, sat her up in front of him, and cantered off with his arms around her as he loosely held the reins. She was becoming more comfortable with his horses, and they went back and got Pegasus and Athena and walked them to the rehearsal ring. And once there, he led them through their liberty commands for a few minutes to warm up as Christianna watched him. He had gotten even better with them in the past five months, although he knew he still wasn"t as good as Alex. And a few minutes later, he helped her into Athena"s saddle, and they rode side by side on the Lipizzaners, taking them through their paces. And as Christianna had commented earlier, it looked like a ballet. She appeared more confident than she felt in the saddle, and Nick corrected her gently and gave her pointers. And in the end, she stood on Athena"s steady back and rode around the ring, as he pulled Pegasus aside and then joined her for their finale. It was perfect, and her blue eyes were blazing when they stopped.
"How was it?" she asked him with a smile of pure pleasure. For a moment, it almost reminded her of being on the wire. She had felt like she was flying. "It felt great!"
"You are fabulous!" he complimented her, and knowing that no one was watching, he leaned over and kissed her, and they exchanged a warm smile. They looked like royalty on his spectacular horses, and after rehearsal, he walked her to where her trailer was parked. "See you later," he said, and then went back to the boys, who were thrilled to be in New York and wanted to go sightseeing the next day. Lucas insisted he wanted to go to the Empire State Building, since he hadn"t gotten there after the boat. It was going to be an exciting month, being in the city and performing at Madison Square Garden. Christianna was as happy to be there as his children, although the Garden wasn"t new to her. But this time she would be performing there with Nick, who was her proverbial Prince Charming, and she felt like a fairy princess, riding the beautiful Lipizzaners with him. And they both hoped that the audience in New York would be dazzled by their new act.
Chapter 12.
Their opening-night performance in New York was almost flawless, and Nick was thrilled with Christianna. She had added a new dimension to his act, and the audience responded with thunderous applause. It just got better and better for the month they were there. And they loved being in New York. Christianna went sightseeing several times with Nick and his boys, whenever they had a day off. Lucas got them to go to the top of the Empire State Building three times. And Nick invited her to go everywhere with them. They even managed to go out to dinner alone a few times.
There was tension among many of the Eastern European performers when they first arrived in New York, as. .h.i.tler had occupied Czechoslovakia in March, and many of them still had relatives there. Gallina and her family were particularly worried and upset. There was much talk about it and deep concern, which was still ongoing when the circus left New York in early May, and headed to Boston.
Lucas and even Toby were sad to leave New York. After Boston, they went south to Connecticut, then to Baltimore, Washington, and Philadelphia for two or three days in each city. It was a grueling schedule after weeks in one place in New York, which they all loved. After New York, the roustabouts had to set up the circus and tear it down every few days. They were used to it, but it was an incredible amount of work.
After Philadelphia, they went to rural Pennsylvania, and then New Jersey, Ohio, Kentucky, Michigan, Wisconsin. They were literally all over the map. They made their way west in August, north into Canada for a week, and then dropped down to Washington and Oregon at the end of the month.
They were in Eugene, Oregon, on September 1 when Germany invaded Poland, which panicked everyone in the circus. They had just gotten to Redding, California, when England, France, Australia, and New Zealand declared war on Germany on September 3, and the entire world was stunned. Europe was at war.
Despite the terrible news and his concern for his father, Nick was excited to be in California, and had looked forward to it for the entire trip. Nick had felt a pull toward California ever since he had come to the States. They went to San Francisco for two days, which Nick and his boys found thrilling as they walked along the Embarcadero and looked at the big ships, and admired the Golden Gate Bridge, which had recently been finished, and another bridge that spanned the east side of the bay. The views of the city were beautiful from all sides. And then they went to Los Angeles and San Diego, and back up to Santa Barbara, where they were given two days off. It was the opportunity for Christianna and Nick to spend time together. Nick and Christianna had been hoping for it for months.
Nick had no idea how she pulled it off, but Christianna told her father, brothers, and aunt that she was going back to Los Angeles for the night with three of the Ukrainian female gymnasts. They had friends in the San Fernando Valley, and they had actually invited her to come along. And she asked them to cover for her instead. They were happy to help, and two of them suspected the reason, but didn"t know with whom.
Nick asked Gallina to keep an eye on Toby and Lucas, and he borrowed a car. Pierre the French clown had said he could get him one, and Nick burst out laughing when he saw what it was. It was the yellow "taxi" that the clowns used during the intermission as part of their act, with the familiar logo on it that said "The Greatest Show on Earth." Nick was waiting in it for Christianna when she came running in a white dress and proper shoes, carrying a small bag, and she laughed, too, when she saw the car Nick had gotten for their two days away. They had been planning this for ages. And she was laughing and smiling as she got in beside him. The car had no backseat so it could accommodate more bodies when the clowns piled in on top of each other, so they could spill out in the center ring and make the audience laugh. It was a far cry from Nick"s blue Bugatti or his father"s Duesenberg, and all he could do was laugh as he kissed Christianna and drove away. They had actually managed to escape. He took her to the Santa Ynez Valley, which he had been told was beautiful horse country, and he wanted to see it with her. It was a two-hour drive from Santa Barbara, and the countryside was beautiful as they drove along in the ridiculous car.
"Well, no one will have any doubts about where we come from," he said as they parked outside a restaurant for lunch, and he followed her inside. They had hamburgers, and afterward drove the rest of the way. Once they were in the valley, they saw a small hotel that looked like a Swiss chalet. Nick went inside and rented a room, and then they went upstairs. It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining, the weather was warm, and the room was cozy with a big four-poster bed, and the moment he closed the door behind them, Nick took her into his arms and felt the sheer joy of just holding her and being alone. He had been desperate to share this moment with her for so long, and so had she with him.
"I can"t believe we did it and we"re finally together," he said as he breathed in the clean smell of her hair, and then kissed her neck. They hadn"t had a day and night off in months, and she was constantly surrounded by her family and could hardly ever get away. The time they shared was always too brief and infinitely precious, and now finally they had two whole nights away to do whatever they wanted. It was a luxury and a gift beyond belief, and they intended to spend it well, discovering each other and the ecstasy of being together alone at last.
Christianna was so overwhelmed for a moment when they got to their room, that she didn"t know what to say, as he slowly undressed her, and gently put her in the big comfortable bed. He slipped in beside her an instant later, turning his back to her at first as he slipped off the rest of his clothes. He didn"t want to frighten her, he knew she was a virgin, but she held her arms out to him as though it were their wedding night, and for them it was. They had waited six months for this, and he wanted it to be perfect. He took her as gently as he could and made love to her with all the pa.s.sion he had felt for her since the day they met. He had never loved anyone as he did her.
She lay in his arms afterward, with a peaceful look, and she smiled at him with her enormous blue eyes.
"I belong to you now, Nick," she whispered.
"And I to you ... I love you so much." He wanted her to promise that she would never do the high-wire act again. He didn"t want to lose her or have anything bad happen to her. But he knew he had no right to ask her to give it up, at least not yet, but he hoped that one day he would. He wanted her far away from all the dangers in her life, and wanted to keep her safe.
He looked at her then with everything he felt for her and kissed her, and then made love to her again, and this time it was even better for her. He taught her all the wonders of their bodies, and reveled in the beauty and joys of hers.
They stayed in bed until the sun was almost setting, and then they showered together and dressed. She was totally at ease standing naked before him, and he couldn"t believe how perfect she was. Every inch of her was in proportion and delicately carved. She was like a statue of a beautiful young woman, and all he wanted to do was gaze at her in awe. It was hard to force himself to get dressed, but he wanted to go out walking with her and look around the town. And after they did, they drove out into the countryside, wending their way around the Santa Ynez mountains, and he stopped when he got to a bluff. They got out of the car, and stood looking at the sun, which was setting over the mountains by then, and he knew he wanted to come back here with her one day.
She slipped her hand quietly into his, and leaned her head against his shoulder as they stood looking down at the valley, and he spoke as though in a dream.
"I want a horse ranch here one day, where I can breed Lipizzaners." He turned to her then with a serious expression. "I don"t know how we"ll do it yet, but I want to do that with you." It was as close as he had come to a proposal so far, and she gazed at him wistfully.
"I can"t leave the circus, Nick. You know that." She was always honest with him.
"We will one day. I want a better life for my boys, and you and our children, than I can give you there. I don"t want you on the high wire for the rest of your life," or at all, he almost said. "We"ll know when it"s the right time, Christianna. I can"t afford it yet anyway. But I hope that one day I will, and I want you to come with me. I know this is the place. I knew it the minute I heard about it." It was the first thing he"d seen that made up for the country he had lost. He could easily imagine a life here one day, with her. And he wouldn"t leave the circus until she was ready to go with him. He felt like he"d come home as he looked out over the valley from their vantage point, and he put an arm around her just as the sun disappeared behind the hills, and then he kissed her, and they got in the car and went back toward their hotel.
He took her out to dinner that night at an Italian restaurant. They laughed and talked, and she told him about growing up in the circus and wanting to be a clown, which made him laugh.
"You would have made a beautiful clown." He chuckled. "I"m afraid that"s what Lucas wants to be now too. Toby says he wants to be a vet, for horses, which isn"t a bad idea. We could use a vet if we"re going to have a ranch one day." He spoke of it as though it were a reality, and she looked at him with worried eyes.
"You"re serious about that, aren"t you?"
"Yes, I am." She could see that he was.
"What if I can"t go with you?" she asked in a sad whisper that touched his heart.
"Then I"ll have to kidnap you. I know it will be the right thing for us," he said quietly, but she couldn"t imagine leaving everything she knew.
"I"ve never been anywhere but the circus. I don"t know any other life." Her eyes were huge as she said it to him, and he could see that she was scared. He reached across the table and took her delicate hand in his own.
"I want to share my life with you, Christianna. I can"t give you the life I left behind in Germany, but I think I can give you a good one here one day, when we"re both ready. A happy life for us and our children." It was the second time he had referred to their children that day, and she smiled as he said it.
"It"s what I want too," she said softly. "I just don"t know how to get there." Her family would be a major obstacle to overcome. They would fight her every inch of the way if she tried to leave with him, and he knew that too.
"We"ll find a way. Together. I"m here with you." She nodded, and he lifted her fingers to his lips and kissed them. "Don"t worry. It will be fine."
"I hope that"s true." She wanted a life together as much as he did, but she couldn"t imagine it away from the circus, and he could.
"It is true," he said quietly. And then he paid for their dinner, and they left the restaurant and went back to their hotel and made love again. It was the most perfect night of her life, and when she woke next to him in the morning, he was smiling at her. He had been watching her for hours as she slept peacefully.
They spent the day exploring the area, and talking about his imaginary ranch and where it would be. They went wading in a stream, and lay under a tree together until they fell asleep. They bought sandwiches and had a picnic, and they went back to the bluff and watched the sunset again, and they brought dinner back to their room that night. He wanted to savor every minute they had together, and then they talked about what they would do when they went back. She said her brothers would kill her if they knew she had spent these two nights with him. And Nick had been as careful as he could be not to get her pregnant. He didn"t want anything to go wrong for them.
"I want you to get to know my family," she said softly. "Maybe you could come to dinner with them, with the boys."
"I"ll do anything you want, Christianna." He kissed her and looked at her seriously. "I"m here to stay, if you want me."
"I do," she whispered, and she believed him. And in all her beauty, with her lovely body lying naked across their bed, she looked like a fairy who had floated into his life like a dream.
"I want to go away with you again whenever we can," he said quietly. It had been perfection for both of them. And they knew that when they went back to the circus, they"d have to be discreet. There was always so much gossip about who was sleeping with whom, Nick didn"t want them to be part of it, and he wanted to protect Christianna in every way.
He made love to her again that night before they went to sleep, and in the morning when they got up, and then slowly they got ready to leave the room that had been their honeymoon suite, without benefit of papers or a ring, but the feelings they shared were the same. And when they left the little inn, they both knew that they had formed a bond that would carry them through everything, whatever they needed it to. No one and nothing could come between them now. She felt entirely his.
On the way back to Santa Barbara, they talked again about his getting to know her family. She wanted her brothers to like him, and her father and aunt. It would make things easier for her.
"How do they feel about your performing with me now?" He knew they had been unhappy about it in the beginning, but she was so good at it that he hoped they had calmed down.
"They still think I should only do the high wire. They think horses are dangerous, and they"re afraid I might get hurt." She smiled as she said it, aware of the irony, and Nick laughed.
"But the high wire without a net is fine. Oh G.o.d," he said ruefully, as she smiled and leaned over to kiss him.
"I"m going to miss you tonight," she said sadly. It had been so wonderful to wake up next to him for two days.
"Maybe we can work things out," he said hopefully, "not every night, but whenever we can. I"ll figure out something with the boys. And we can go away again. If we get a night off, we can disappear somewhere." It wasn"t going to be easy, but they were both determined to try.
They were sad when they saw the Santa Barbara fairground come into view. It had been such a wonderful two days. She smiled as she looked at him. She felt like a woman now, not just a girl, and he was her man.
She told him to drop her off as far from her trailer as possible, and she would make her way back on her own. She didn"t want to run into her brothers on the way back, or worse, see them while she was with Nick. And he had to return the car to the clown.
"I think our chariot is about to turn into a pumpkin," Nick said, laughing, as he stopped some distance from a group of trailers that neither of them recognized. She wanted to stop in and see the Ukrainian girls to match up their stories.
"I think our chariot turned into a pumpkin before we left," Christianna said, and laughed too. It had been a ridiculous car for their romantic vacation, but it had gotten them where they were going.
"I used to have a very fancy car," he told her, somewhat nostalgically. "I never thought I"d go on the most romantic holiday of my life, with the most beautiful woman in the world, in a clown car." They both chuckled at that, and she kissed him and then reluctantly got out of the car with her bag.
"I"ll see you in a little while," she said softly. They had a performance together that night. "Thank you for everything. I had a wonderful time."
"So did I." He smiled at her from across the car. "The first of many," he promised. "See you tonight." And then he added for good measure, "Say hi to the Ukrainians, and thank them from me."
"I"ll be sure not to do that," she said, grinning. She didn"t want anyone to know who she"d been with, and had no intention of telling them, although they had been curious when she asked for their help. The age difference between her and Nick would throw everyone off the scent, for now at least. And they"d been extremely discreet, so her family wouldn"t know. She set off on foot toward the Ukrainian girls" trailer, across the fairground, to see if they were back.
When she got there, they had just returned from L.A. themselves, and were getting ready for rehearsal.