"On the fifth charge, I must beg that the court will be pleased to consider that some allowance ought to be made for a moment of irritation. My character was traduced by Captain Hawkins, supposing that I was dead; so much so, that even the ship"s company cried out _shame._ I am aware, that no language of a superior officer can warrant a retort from an inferior; but, as what I intended to imply by that language is not yet known, although Captain Hawkins has given an explanation to his, I shall merely say, that I meant no more by my insinuations, than Captain Hawkins did at the time, by those which he made use of with respect to me.
"Upon the other trifling charges brought forward, I lay no stress, as I consider them fully refuted by the evidence which has been already adduced; and I shall merely observe, that, for reasons best known to himself, I have been met with a most decided hostility on the part of Captain Hawkins, from the time that he first joined the ship; that, on every occasion, he has used all his efforts to render me uncomfortable, and embroil me with others; that, not content with narrowly watching my conduct on board, he has resorted to his spy-gla.s.s from the sh.o.r.e; and, instead of a.s.sisting me in the execution of a duty sufficiently arduous, he has thrown every obstacle in my way, placed inferior officers as spies over my conduct, and made me feel so humiliated in the presence of the ship"s company, over which I have had to superintend, and in the disciplining of which I had a right to look to him for support, that, were it not that some odium would necessarily be attached to the sentence, I should feel it as one of the happiest events of my life that I were dismissed from the situation which I now hold under his command.
I now beg that the honourable court will allow the doc.u.ments I lay upon the table to be read in support of my character."
When this was over, the court was cleared, that they might decide upon the sentence. I waited about half an hour in the greatest anxiety, when I was again summoned to attend. The usual forms of reading the papers were gone through, and then came the sentence, which was read by the president, he and the whole court standing up with their c.o.c.ked hats on their heads. After the preamble, it concluded with saying, "that it was the opinion of that court that the charges had been _partly_ proved, and therefore, that Lieutenant Peter Simple was dismissed his ship; but, in consideration of his good character and services, his case was strongly recommended to the consideration of the Lords Commissioners of the Admiralty."
Chapter LXIII
Peter looks upon his loss as something gained--Goes on board the _Rattlesnake_ to pack up, and is ordered to pack off--Polite leave-taking between relations. Mrs Trotter better and better--Goes to London, and afterwards falls into all manner of misfortunes by the hands of robbers, and of his own uncle.
I hardly knew whether I felt glad or sorry at this sentence. On the one hand, it was almost a deathblow to my future advancement or employment in the service; on the other, the recommendation very much softened down the sentence, and I was quite happy to be quit of Captain Hawkins, and free to hasten to my poor sister. I bowed respectfully to the court, which immediately adjourned. Captain Hawkins followed the captains on the quarter-deck, but none of them would speak to him--so much to his disadvantage had come out during the trial.
About ten minutes afterwards, one of the elder captains composing the court called me into the cabin. "Mr Simple," said he, "we are all very sorry for you. Our sentence could not be more lenient, under the circ.u.mstances: it was that conversation with the gunner at the taffrail which floored you. It must be a warning to you to be more careful in future, how you permit any one to speak of the conduct of your superiors on the quarter-deck. I am desired by the president to let you know that it is our intention to express ourselves very strongly to the admiral in your behalf; so much so, that if another captain applies for you, you will have no difficulty in being appointed to a ship; and as for leaving your present ship, under any other circ.u.mstances I should consider it a matter of congratulation."
I returned my sincere thanks, and soon afterwards quitted the guard-ship, and went on board of the brig to pack up my clothes, and take leave of my messmates. On my arrival, I found that Captain Hawkins had preceded me, and he was on deck when I came up the side. I hastened down into the gun-room, where I received the condolements of my messmates.
"Simple, I wish you joy," cried Thompson, loud enough for the captain to hear on deck. "I wish I had your luck; I wish somebody would try me by a court-martial."
"As it has turned out," replied I, in a loud voice, "and after the communication made to me by the captains composing the court, of what they intend to say to the Admiralty, I agree with you, Thompson, that it is a very kind act on the part of Captain Hawkins, and I feel quite grateful to them."
"Steward, come--gla.s.ses," cried Thompson, "and let us drink success to Mr Simple."
All this was very annoying to Captain Hawkins, who overheard every word.
When our gla.s.ses were filled--"Simple, your good health, and may I meet with as good a messmate," said Thompson.
At this moment, the sergeant of marines put his head in at the gun-room door, and said, in a most insolent tone, that I was to leave the ship immediately. I was so irritated, that I threw my gla.s.s of grog in his face, and he ran up to the captain to make the complaint; but I did not belong to the ship, and even if I had, I would have resented such impertinence.
Captain Hawkins was in a great rage, and I believe would have written for another court-martial, but he had had enough of them. He inquired very particularly of the sergeant whether he had told me that I was to leave the ship directly, or whether, that Captain Hawkins desired that I should leave the ship immediately; and finding that he had not given the latter message (which I was aware of, for had he given it, I dare not have acted as I did); he then sent down again by one of the midshipmen, desiring me to leave the ship immediately. My reply was, that I should certainly obey his orders with the greatest pleasure. I hastened to pack up my clothes, reported myself ready to the second lieutenant, who went up for permission to man a boat, which was refused by Captain Hawkins, who said I might go on sh.o.r.e in a sh.o.r.e-boat. I called one alongside, shook hands with all my messmates, and when I arrived on the quarter-deck, with Swinburne, and some of the best men, who came forward; Captain Hawkins stood by the binnacle, bursting with rage. As I went over the planeshear, I took my hat off to him, and wished him good-morning very respectfully, adding, "If you have any commands for my _uncle_, Captain Hawkins, I shall be glad to execute them."
This observation, which showed him that I knew the connection and correspondence between them, made him gasp with emotion. "Leave the ship, sir, or by G.o.d I"ll put you in irons for mutiny," cried he. I again took off my hat, and went down the side, and shoved off.
As soon as I was a few yards distant, the men jumped on the carronades and cheered, and I perceived Captain Hawkins order them down, and before I was a cable"s length from her, the pipe "all hands to punishment;" so I presume some of the poor fellows suffered for their insubordination in showing their good will. I acknowledge that I might have left the ship in a more dignified manner, and that my conduct was not altogether correct; but still, I state what I really did do, and some allowance must be made for my feelings. This is certain, that my conduct after the court-martial, was more deserving of punishment, than that for which I had been tried. But I was in a state of feverish excitement, and hardly knew what I did.
When I arrived at Sally Port, I had my effects wheeled up to the Blue Posts, and packing up those which I most required, I threw off my uniform, and was once more a gentleman at large. I took my place in the mail for that evening, sent a letter of thanks, with a few bank notes, to my counsel, and then sat down and wrote a long letter to O"Brien, acquainting him with the events which had taken place.
I had just finished, and sealed it up, when in came Mrs Trotter. "Oh my dear Mr Simple! I"m so sorry, and I have come to console you. There"s nothing like women when men are in affliction, as poor Trotter used to say, as he laid his head in my lap. When do you go to town?"
"This evening, Mrs Trotter."
"I hope I am to continue to attend the ship?"
"I hope so too, Mrs Trotter, I have no doubt but you will."
"Now, Mr Simple, how are you off for money? Do you want a little? You can pay me by-and-by. Don"t be afraid. I"m not quite so poor as I was when you came down to mess with Trotter and me, and when you gave me the dozen pair of stockings. I know what it is to want money, and what it is to want friends."
"Many thanks to you, Mrs Trotter," replied I; "but I have sufficient to take me home, and then I can obtain more."
"Well, I"m glad of it, but it was offered in earnest. Good-bye, G.o.d bless you! Come, Mr Simple, give me a kiss; it won"t be the first time."
I kissed her, for I felt grateful for her kindness; and with a little smirking and ogling she quitted the room. I could not help thinking, after she was gone, how little we know the hearts of others. If I had been asked if Mrs Trotter was a person to have done a generous action, from what I had seen of her in adversity, I should have decidedly said, No. Yet in this offer she was disinterested, for she knew the service well enough to be aware that I had little chance of being a first lieutenant again, and of being of service to her. And how often does it also occur, that those who ought, from grat.i.tude or long friendship, to do all they can to a.s.sist you, turn from you in your necessity, and prove false and treacherous! It is G.o.d alone who knows our hearts. I sent my letter to O"Brien to the admiral"s office, sat down to a dinner which I could not taste, and at seven o"clock got into the mail.
When I arrived in town I was much worse, but I did not wait more than an hour. I took my place in a coach which did not go to the town near which we resided; for I had inquired and found that coach was full, and I did not choose to wait another day. The coach in which I took my place went within forty miles of the vicarage, and I intended to post across the country. The next evening I arrived at the point of separation, and taking out my portmanteau, ordered a chaise, and set off for what had once been my home. I could hardly hold my head up, I was so ill, and I lay in a corner of the chaise in a sort of dream, kept from sleeping from intense pain in the forehead and temples. It was about nine o"clock at night, when we were in a dreadful jolting road, the shocks proceeding from which gave me agonizing pain, that the chaise was stopped by two men, who dragged me out on the gra.s.s. One stood over me, while the other rifled the chaise. The post-boy, who appeared a party to the transaction, remained quietly on his horse, and as soon as they had taken my effects, turned round and drove off. They then rifled my person, taking away everything that I had, leaving me nothing but my trousers and shirt. After a short consultation, they ordered me to walk on in the direction in which we had been proceeding in the chaise, and to hasten as fast as I could, or they would blow my brains out. I complied with their request, thinking myself fortunate to have escaped so well. I knew that I was still thirty miles at least from the vicarage; but ill as I was, I hoped to be able to reach it on foot. I walked during the remainder of the night, but I got on but slowly. I reeled from one side of the road to the other, and occasionally sat down to rest. Morning dawned, and I perceived habitations not far from me. I staggered on in my course.
The fever now raged in me, my head was splitting with agony, and I tottered to a bank near a small neat cottage, on the side of the road. I have a faint recollection of some one coming to me and taking my hand, but nothing further; and it was not till many months afterwards, that I became acquainted with the circ.u.mstances which I now relate. It appears that the owner of the cottage was a half-pay lieutenant in the army, who had sold-out on account of his wounds. I was humanely taken into his house, laid on a bed, and a surgeon requested to come to me immediately.
I had now lost all recollection, and who I was they could not ascertain.
My pockets were empty, and it was only by the mark on my linen that they found that my name was Simple. For three weeks I remained in a state of alternate stupor and delirium. When the latter came on, I raved of Lord Privilege, O"Brien, and Celeste. Mr Selwin, the officer who had so kindly a.s.sisted me, knew that Simple was the patronymic name of Lord Privilege, and he immediately wrote to his lordship, stating that a young man of the name of Simple, who, in his delirium called upon him and Captain O"Brien, was lying in a most dangerous state in his house, and, that as he presumed I was a relative of his lordship"s he had deemed it right to apprise him of the fact.
My uncle, who knew that it must be me, thought this too favourable an opportunity, provided I should live, not to have me in his power. He wrote to say that he would be there in a day or two; at the same time thanking Mr Selwin for his kind attention to his poor nephew, and requesting that no expense might be spared. When my uncle arrived, which he did in his own chariot, the crisis of the fever was over, but I was still in a state of stupor, arising from extreme debility. He thanked Mr Selwin for his attention, which he said he was afraid was of little avail, as I was every year becoming more deranged; and he expressed his fears that it would terminate in chronic lunacy. "His poor father died in the same state," continued my uncle, pa.s.sing his hand across his eyes, as if much affected. "I have brought my physician with me, to see if he can be moved. I shall not be satisfied unless I am with him night and day."
The physician (who was my uncle"s valet) took me by the hand, felt my pulse, examined my eyes, and p.r.o.nounced that it would be very easy to move me, and that I should recover sooner in a more airy room. Of course, Mr Selwin raised no objections, putting down all to my uncle"s regard for me; and my clothes were put on me, as I lay in a state of insensibility, and I was lifted into the chariot. It is most wonderful that I did not die from being thus taken out of my bed in such a state, but it pleased Heaven that it should be otherwise. Had such an event taken place, it would probably have pleased my uncle much better than my surviving. When I was in the carriage, supported by the pseudo-physician, my uncle again thanked Mr Selwin, begged that he would command his interest, wrote a handsome cheque for the surgeon who had attended me, and getting into the carriage, drove off with me still in a state of insensibility--that is, I was not so insensible, but I think I felt I had been removed, and I heard the rattling of the wheels; but my mind was so uncollected, and I was in a state of such weakness, that I could not feel a.s.sured of it for a minute.
For some days afterwards, for I recollect nothing about the journey, I found myself in bed in a dark room and my arms confined. I recalled my senses, and by degrees was able to recollect all that had occurred, until I laid down by the roadside. Where was I? The room was dark, I could distinguish nothing; that I had attempted to do myself some injury, I took for granted, or my arms would not have been secured. I had been in a fever and delirious, I supposed, and had now recovered. I had been in a reverie for more than an hour, wondering why I was left alone, when the door of the apartment opened. "Who is there?" inquired I.
"Oh! you"ve come to yourself again," said a gruff voice; "then I"ll give you a little daylight."
He took down a shutter which covered the whole of the window, and a flood of light poured in, which blinded me. I shut my eyes, and by degrees admitted the light until I could bear it. I looked at the apartment: the walls were bare and whitewashed. I was on a truckle-bed.
I looked at the window--it was closed up with iron bars.--"Why, where am I?" inquired I of the man, with alarm.
"Where are you?" replied he; "why, in Bedlam!"
Chapter LXIV
As...o...b..ien said; it"s a long lane that has no turning--I am rescued, and happiness pours in upon me as fast as misery before overwhelmed me.
The shock was too great--I fell back on my pillow insensible. How long I laid, I know not, but when I recovered the keeper was gone, and I found a jug of water and some bread by the side of the bed, I drank the water, and the effect it had upon me was surprising. I felt that I could get up, and I rose: my arms had been unpinioned during my swoon. I got on my feet, and staggered to the window. I looked out, saw the bright sun, the pa.s.sers-by, the houses opposite--all looked cheerful and gay, but I was a prisoner in a madhouse. Had I been mad? I reflected, and supposed that I had been, and had been confined by those who knew nothing of me. It never came into my head that my uncle had been a party to it. I threw myself on the bed, and relieved myself with tears. It was about noon that the medical people, attended by the keepers and others, came into my apartment. "Is he quite quiet?" "O Lord! yes, sir, as quiet as a lamb," replied the man who had before entered. I then spoke to the medical gentleman, begging him to tell why, and how, I had been brought here. He answered mildly and soothingly, saying that I was there at the wish of my friends, and that every care would be taken of me; that he was aware that my paroxysms were only occasional, and that, during the time I was quiet, I should have every indulgence that could be granted, and that he hoped that I soon should be perfectly well, and be permitted to leave the hospital. I replied by stating who I was, and how I had been taken ill. The doctor shook his head, advised me to lie down as much as possible, and then quitted me to visit the other patients.
As I afterwards discovered, my uncle had had me confined upon the plea that I was a young man who was deranged with an idea that his name was Simple, and that he was the heir to the t.i.tle and estates; that I was very troublesome at times, forcing my way into his house and insulting the servants, but in every other respect was harmless; that my paroxysms generally ended in a violent fever, and it was more from the fear of my coming to some harm, than from any ill-will towards the poor young man, that he wished me to remain in the hospital, and be taken care of. The reader may at once perceive the art of this communication: I, having no idea why I was confined, would of course continue to style myself by my true name; and as long as I did this, so long would I be considered in a deranged state. The reader must not therefore be surprised when I tell him that I remained in Bedlam for one year and eight months. The doctor called upon me for two or three days, and finding me quiet, ordered me to be allowed books, paper, and ink, to amuse myself; but every attempt at explanation was certain to be the signal for him to leave my apartment. I found, therefore, not only by him, but from the keeper, who paid no attention to anything I said, that I had no chance of being listened to, or of obtaining my release.
After the first month, the doctor came to me no more: I was a quiet patient, and he received the report of the keeper. I was sent there with every necessary doc.u.ment to prove that I was mad; and, although a very little may establish a case of lunacy, it requires something very strong indeed to prove that you are in your right senses. In Bedlam I found it impossible. At the same time I was well treated, was allowed all necessary comforts, and such amus.e.m.e.nt as could be obtained from books, &c. I had no reason to complain of the keeper--except that he was too much employed to waste his time in listening to what he did not believe.
I wrote several letters to my sister and to O"Brien, during the first two or three months, and requested the keeper to put them in the post.
This he promised to do, never refusing to take the letters; but, as I afterwards found out, they were invariably destroyed. Yet I still bore up with the hopes of release for some time; but the anxiety relative to my sister, when I thought of her situation, my thoughts of Celeste and of O"Brien, sometimes quite overcame me; then, indeed, I would almost become frantic, and the keeper would report that I had had a paroxysm.
After six months I became melancholy, and I wasted away. I no longer attempted to amuse myself, but sat all day with my eyes fixed upon vacancy. I no longer attended to my person; I allowed my beard to grow-- my face was never washed, unless mechanically, when ordered by the keeper; and if I was not mad, there was every prospect of my soon becoming so. Life pa.s.sed away as a blank--I had become indifferent to everything--I noted time no more--the change of seasons was unperceived --even the day and the night followed without my regarding them.
I was in this unfortunate situation, when one day the door was opened, and, as had been often the custom during my imprisonment, visitors were going round the establishment, to indulge their curiosity, in witnessing the degradation of their fellow-creatures, or to offer their commiseration. I paid no heed to them, not even casting up my eyes.
"This young man," said the medical gentleman who accompanied the party, "has entertained the strange idea that his name is Simple, and that he is the rightful heir to the t.i.tle and property of Lord Privilege."
One of the visitors came up to me, and looked me in the face. "And so he is," cried he to the doctor, who looked with astonishment. "Peter, don"t you know me?" I started up. It was General O"Brien. I flew into his arms, and burst into tears.
"Sir," said General O"Brien, leading me to the chair, and seating me upon it, "I tell you that _is_ Mr Simple, the nephew of Lord Privilege; and I believe, the heir to the t.i.tle. If, therefore, his a.s.sertion of such being the case is the only proof of his insanity, he is illegally confined. I am here, a foreigner, and a prisoner on parole; but I am not without friends. My Lord Belmore," said he, turning to another of the visitors who had accompanied him, "I pledge you my honour that what I state is true; and I request that you will immediately demand the release of this poor young man."