"Very well, it is understood, then. But I repeat once more that I shall expect the utmost caution on your part. Your reward depends upon that."
"Mademoiselle can punish me in any way she pleases if I break my word."
"I would much rather reward you. See what you can do about that door now, and let me hear early to-morrow morning."
"But really, mademoiselle, all this is very extraordinary!"
"What do you mean?"
"I refer to mademoiselle"s desire to go to Madame Herbaut"s. It seems to me such a strange idea on mademoiselle"s part. But I feel no uneasiness," added the governess, with a complacent air. "I know mademoiselle too well to suppose for one moment that she would involve a poor woman like myself in any trouble, and though I do not presume to question mademoiselle, may I not--as I, of course, must not speak of this matter to any one else--may I not know why, mademoiselle--"
"Good-night, my dear Laine," said mademoiselle, rising, and thus putting an end to the conversation. "Let me know the results of your researches early to-morrow morning."
Delighted to have a secret between her pupil and herself at last, a secret which she regarded as convincing proof of a confidence which would ensure her a modest fortune, at least, Madame Laine discreetly withdrew, leaving Mlle. de Beaumesnil again alone.
After a few moments of reflection the orphan unlocked her desk, and, opening the journal dedicated to her mother, began to write hurriedly, even impetuously.
CHAPTER x.x.xII.
UNBURDENING THE HEART.
"The resolve I have just made, my dear mother," wrote Ernestine, "is a dangerous one; I fear I did wrong to make it, but to whom can I turn for advice?
"To you, my dearest mother, I know, but it was while invoking your aid and protection that this idea occurred to me, and I feel that I must solve, at any cost, the doubts that so torment me.
"During the last few days many revelations have been made to me, some of such a sad and depressing nature that they seem to have upset me entirely, and it is with great difficulty, even now, that I can compose myself sufficiently to lay my heart bare to you, my kind and tender mother.
"For some time after my arrival in this house, I could speak only in terms of the highest praise of my guardian and his family, though sometimes in my secret heart I did censure them a little for the inordinate amount of flattery and attention they lavished upon me.
"This attention and these flatteries have not ceased; they have rather increased, if that were possible.
"My mental attributes, my character, and even my slightest word and act are praised in the most exaggerated way. As for my figure, my bearing, my personal appearance, and my every movement, they are all equally graceful, enchanting, divine,--in short, there is not a more attractive person in the world than I am.
"Saintly Mlle. Helena, who was never known to utter an untruth, a.s.sures me that I look like a madonna.
"Madame de la Rochaigue says, with what she terms really brutal frankness, that I am endowed with such rare distinction and elegance of manner, as well as so many charms of person, that I am sure to become the most admired woman in Paris some day, in spite of myself.
"And last, but not least, according to my guardian, a serious-minded and extremely thoughtful man, the beauty of my features and the dignity of my bearing give me a striking resemblance to the beautiful d.u.c.h.esse de Longueville, so famous under the Fronde.
"And when one day, in my artlessness, I expressed astonishment at my resembling so many persons at the same time, do you know, my dearest mother, what the answer was?
""It is very simple. In you, mademoiselle, the most diverse charms are united, so, in you, each person finds the attraction he prefers."
"And these flatteries pursue me everywhere. If the hair-dresser comes to arrange my hair, never before in his life did he see such superb tresses.
"If I am taken to the milliner"s,"What is the use of selecting any particular shape?" says that lady. "With a face like mademoiselle"s any style is equally charming and becoming."
"The dressmaker declares that my figure is so wonderfully elegant that, dressed in a loosely fitting sack, I should drive the ladies most famed for their perfection of form wild with envy.
"It is the same with the shoemaker, who declares that he will have to make a special last for me, never having worked for the possessor of so small a foot as mine.
"The glovemaker outdoes him even, by declaring that I have the hand of a dwarf.
"So you see, my dear mother, I may almost consider myself a phenomenon, fit for a museum.
"Oh, mother, mother, it was not in this way that you spoke when, taking my face in your two hands, and kissing me on the forehead, you said:
""My poor Ernestine, you are not beautiful, or even pretty, but the candour and sweetness of your disposition are so plainly written on your expressive face that I do not regret your lack of beauty."
"And these words of praise, the only ones, I believe, that you ever gave me, I believed, and they made me very happy.
"But alas! the daughter you so fondly loved, has she remained worthy of you? I do not know. I am not sure.
"Then I knew nothing of doubts, suspicion, and mockery! And for several days past cruel presentiments have taken such a hold on me that I am as much astonished as alarmed.
"There must be something terribly insidious in the effects of flattery, for--to you I must confess all--though I have often thought the praises lavished upon me must be exaggerated, I wondered why it should be that so many different people should be so unanimous in praising everything I said and did.
"Nor is this all.
"The other day Madame de la Rochaigue took me to a concert. I soon perceived that everybody was looking at me. A number of persons even pa.s.sed and repa.s.sed me several times, to examine me more closely, I suppose, though I was very simply dressed. Even when I come out of church I notice that every one stares at me. I mention the fact, and my guardian and his family say: "Yes, you are right. Everybody does stare at you. See what a sensation you create everywhere!"
"And, in the face of this evidence, what can I say? Nothing.
"I must admit that all this flattery was becoming very pleasant to me.
It surprised me less and less, and though it sometimes occurred to me how grossly exaggerated it was, I promptly silenced any misgivings on the subject, by saying to myself:
""But if this is not true, why is the sensation I create--as my guardian says--so general?"
"Alas! I was soon to learn.
"This is what occurred:
"A gentleman of whom I have never dared to speak until now, has called at my guardian"s house several times. This gentleman is M. le Marquis de Maillefort. He is deformed; he has a sardonic air, and he is always uttering the most sarcastic remarks or ironical compliments that sting worse than his sarcasms.
"On account of the antipathy he inspired in me, I usually found some excuse for leaving the drawing-room soon after his arrival, and I was encouraged in this by the persons around me, for they both feared and hated M. de Maillefort, though they always greeted him with pretended affability.
"Three days ago he was ushered into the room where I happened to be sitting alone with Mlle. Helena. To leave the room at once would have been too discourteous, so I remained, hoping to be able to make my escape in a few minutes.
"This short conversation then ensued between M. de Maillefort and Mlle.
Helena. Alas! I have not forgotten a word of it.
""Ah, good evening, my dear Mlle. Helena," the marquis began, with his most sarcastic air. "I am delighted to find Mlle. de Beaumesnil with you. She will derive such benefit from your pious conversation. She must profit so much by your excellent counsels, as well as by those of your worthy brother and your no less excellent sister-in-law!"
""We hope so, indeed, M. le marquis, for we feel that we have a sacred duty to fulfil towards Mlle. de Beaumesnil."