"And sweeter still to love you," she retorted, smiling and rousing herself. "Sit here in this chair," she added, rising and forcing me to do the same; and when I had complied she drew a large ha.s.sock toward me, and seating herself upon it while she rested one shapely arm across my knees, with her face upturned to mine, she continued the story.
"Shall I continue to represent you as being the embodiment of the character I am describing?" she asked.
"If you prefer it so."
"Listen, then, for I think I do prefer it so. I want you to hear the story to the end, for it will make you understand many things which are now obscured; and if I give you the part of the great actor in this tragedy, that also is for a purpose."
"Yes, dear."
"You returned to St. Petersburg intent upon two things, and only two.
After those two duties should be accomplished, you meant to take your own life; and in that purpose you were upheld by those among your friends who knew your story.
"You meant to kill the man who had betrayed your sister into the hands of the police, and after that to destroy the real author of all her misfortunes and yours--the czar. You had changed so that you needed no disguise. Had your sister been alive and well, and had she met you on the street she would not have known you. Your once tall form so erect and soldier-like, was bent, and your former quick tread had become unsteady. Your hair, black as the wing of a raven when you went away, was now white, like the snow that is heaped out there in the street.
None of your old friends recognized you although you met and pa.s.sed many of them on the avenues and streets in the full light of the day.
Even your fiance who loved you better than she did her life, saw you and pa.s.sed you by unheeded. She saw your wistful glance, and looked upon you wonderingly; but she, like others, believed that you were dead, and although she felt that her heart leaped to her throat and that a spasm of sorrowful recollections convulsed her when she glanced into your eyes, yet she did not know you. And you--you thanked G.o.d that she did not, for you knew that she would have flown into your arms then and there--would have risked Siberia with all its horrors for one more word of love from you. So you pa.s.sed each other on the street so nearly that her furs brushed against you, and she never knew--never knew--until long after you were dead, when those friends who had helped you when all others failed, went to her and told her."
"You were an invalid when you returned to St. Petersburg, and you waited for health and strength before completing your work. You had learned patience during those weary months of searching and waiting in Siberia. Then, too, that same Russian officer whom you had sworn to kill, was absent, and you wished him to return. Your friends told you that he had been restored to favor with the czar, that he had been sent to a post in Siberia; but when you arrived he was expected back within the month. He was to take the very place and a.s.sume the same official rank that you had once filled in the palace, next to the sacred person of the czar. Ah! If you could only find them together, and destroy them at the same time! Such a climax would be sweet indeed. It was for that that you waited and hoped. But he did not come; you waited, and he did not come.
"During all this time you were like a child in the hands of your friends. You did precisely what they told you to do, no more, no less.
You were absorbed by the one idea. You could not see nor reason beyond that. You even forgot your fiance and your love for her, save on that one day when the sight of her on the street brought her vividly before your mind; but the following morning even that recollection was gone.
At last your madness changed to a type more morose and sullen. The delay fretted you, and one day without consulting your friends, you resolved to act. You had reason enough left to know that your mind was growing weaker and you feared that it would be altogether shattered; that you would never avenge the fate of your sister unless you acted at once. You told n.o.body of your intention, but you armed yourself with a pistol and started for the palace. You had determined to kill the czar before your reason fled utterly."
"Regarding the two hours that pa.s.sed between the time you were last seen by your friends, and the events that happened in the palace that day, nothing is known. What streets you traversed on your way there; how you gained admittance to the palace, which was guarded as strictly as it is now; how you pa.s.sed the guards and gained access even to the cabinet of the emperor, are mysteries which have never been solved, and never will be this side of the grave. All that is known is that you ware your old uniform, the same one from which the czar once tore the b.u.t.tons, and it is possible that it had something to do with pa.s.sing you through. At all events you did pa.s.s them all, and you did reach the person of the emperor himself. Ah, it must have been grand! I would that I could have been with you then! I would that I could have seen and heard all that took place there at that time--the only time when the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth has been told to his august majesty. There was one of our agents there who heard it all; that is how I know about it now."
"The emperor was alone when you entered, and you had closed and locked the door of the cabinet before he discovered your presence. He did not know that you were there until a sharp command from you caused him to raise his head; but it was only to see you standing there with the pistol in your hand aimed at his head, and to hear you say that if he uttered one cry for a.s.sistance, or attempted to call for help in any way, you would shoot."
Zara leaped to her feet and strode rapidly across the room twice, wringing her hands. She paused, confronting me.
"Oh, my G.o.d!" she cried. "To think, if you had only told your friends of the errand, and of the plans you had made for reaching the presence of the czar, that it would have succeeded and you would have killed him--_killed him_."
She rushed again to my side, and seized me by the shoulders, so that she turned my face until it exactly confronted hers.
"Dubravnik," she cried. "I can almost believe that I am indeed talking to him--to the man whose history I am relating--when I look at you. In some ways you are like him, so like him! But I will still deceive myself with the idea that I am really talking to him about himself. It is easier so. Oh, my love, be patient with me. I must forget for the moment that you are the man I love. I must compel myself to believe that I am talking to him--to the brother of Yvonne."
"Alexander was always a coward, and he proved it then. He thought that his hour had come, and that a just vengeance for all the lives that he had taken, was about to fall upon him.
""Do not shoot," he pleaded. "You shall have any demand you wish to make. Everything you desire shall be granted." You only laughed at him.
""Do you know who I am?" you cried.
""No," he replied. "Who are you?"
"You told him your name, and he cowered lower in his chair, begging for mercy as a hungry dog begs for food; and all the time you laughed, repeating at every pause he made, those words so terrible for him to hear: "I have come to kill you because you killed Yvonne."
"Once he attempted to leave his chair, but you warned him to remain seated. You rehea.r.s.ed the evils he had done, and was doing. You told him of the night when your sister was arrested. You related how the police had invaded her room. You went over again, the story of your pleading with him. You repeated how he had torn the b.u.t.tons from your coat, and disgraced you because you loved your sister. You left no detail unrecited concerning that time of weary waiting you had undergone, while seeking tidings of your sister. You described the long journey to Saghalien, and the disappointment that awaited you when you arrived. And all the time he cringed lower and lower in his chair, expecting each moment that you would work yourself into the additional frenzy that was necessary to make you pull the trigger of your weapon.
Ah, you made him suffer tortures such as he never endured, before or since, even if you did not succeed in killing him. Then, slowly, and with deadly earnestness, you related the story of the months of wandering over Siberia searching for Yvonne, and finally you came to the climax, where you told of her discovery and her death, at your own hands. You had approached nearer and nearer to him during the recital.
Twice there had been a summons at the door of the cabinet, but each time, threatened by your pistol, the czar had ordered that he was not to be disturbed. Now, as you came to the end of all you had to say--as you told how you had returned to St. Petersburg, and why you had waited so long before the killing, hoping also to find the other and to kill him, too, you put the pistol almost in Alexander"s face, and with a loud laugh of exultation--for you were mad, then, mad--you pulled the trigger."
CHAPTER XVII
LOVE, HONOR AND OBEY
The princess paused and bent her head until it almost touched me. I waited, wondering how it could be that the czar still lived. When death was so near, within a few inches of his face, what could have saved him?
"Hush!" she continued. "The end is not yet--not quite yet. You pulled the trigger, but the charge in the pistol did not explode. That is what you thought, when you leaped backward and raised the hammer for another trial. But it was even worse than that, for there was no charge to explode; the pistol was not loaded. Your poor mind, so overburdened, had forgotten the most necessary thing of all, and you had not prepared your weapon for the work it had to do. You discovered your error too late; but the czar had discovered it also."
"He was bigger and stronger than you. With a bound he was upon you. He seized the pistol and tore it from your grasp, and then, while he held you--for you were still weak and he always was a giant--he struck you with it, bringing it down again and again upon your unprotected head, until your brains were battered out, and were spattered upon the floor, the walls, and even the ceiling of the room. And then, when you were quite dead, killed by the hand of the czar himself, when he for once in his life was spattered with real blood, with blood that he had shed in person and not by deputy, His Imperial Majesty staggered to the door, called for a.s.sistance, and fainted."
Again she left me, this time crossing the room and throwing herself upon a couch, where she cried softly, like one who has an incurable sorrow which must at times break out in tears. After all, tears are the safety valves of nervous expansion, and there are times when they save the heart and the brain from bursting. I knew that, and I left her to herself. But I also believed that she had not yet told me quite all; that there must be a sequel to all this, and I was soon to hear it.
After watching her for a long time, I left my seat and went to her.
She raised her head from the pillow, and looked at me, and I have never seen such a combination of emotions expressed in one glance, as there was in her eyes at that instant. Love for me, sympathy for the fate of the man whose story she had told, sorrow for that poor sister.
"There is more?" I asked.
"Very little more. I have not yet told you why I am a nihilist, and that is what this story is for. Yvonne was my most intimate friend. I loved her as I would have loved--no,--better than I could have loved a sister. Her brother Stanislaus, was my betrothed. We were to have been married within the year when Yvonne was taken away. Now you know all"; and she turned her head away again. I could see that she had dreaded this confession.
"No, not all, yet," I said. "What became of the officer who made all the trouble?"
"He returned," she replied, without again raising her eyes.
"Where is he now?"
"He is here."
"Here? In St. Petersburg?"
"Yes."
"Do you know him? Do you see him?"
"Yes, frequently. He was here last night."
"Will you tell me his name?"
"No."
"Shall I tell it to you?"
"Shall you tell it to me! Do you mean to say that you know it?"
"I can guess it."
"Well?"