Till you found it... you wouldn"t have realized that you were missing something.She just sat there, teetering on the edge of that cliff a single light push away from oblivion, with a blank look in her eyes making his hands tremble with fear.
She slightly tilted her head towards him, as she looked back at him as though asking for help.
"I want to go home..."
Even though there were no emotions in her eyes tears keep falling like pearls on the ground.
"It"s his birthday today."
Her voice was so hoa.r.s.e and barely even whisper that he had to strain to hear her, but for some reason he could understand what she was saying.
He tried to steady his breathing but running around looking for her in rain had made his breathing heavy, and the fear ringing in his ears wasn"t helping at all.
"Ah Yue... listen to me. Come here, let me help you-"
"I don"t know what to do..."
She continued as though she couldn"t hear him at all.
"Why does it hurt so much when I look at you?"
Just those few words hurt him so much. Was it his fault? Had he done something wrong?
But then when he looked at her again, he decided that it didn"t matter right now. He needed to get her somewhere safe... and after that he"d leave so she wouldn"t get hurt.
His eyes cleared up as he looked right at her and said with so much conviction she found herself believing in him.
"I"ll make it stop. I promise I won"t let you get hurt again. Please- Please trust me."
His voice was firm and yet he was begging her.
Qiu Yue slowly raised her arms, as though asking him to come pick her up. It almost broke his heart because in that moment she looked a beautiful yet broken porcelain doll, not the wonderful and vibrant human being he knew her as.
Gently picking her up such that her head lay on his chest while one hand held her below her knees, he took her to his car, setting her down in the front seat before getting into the driver"s seat.
Qiao Feng drove to a private club and hotel establishment nearby. It might seem like a bad choice, but actually it was owned by a friend of his and anonymity was guaranteed. If by any chance the media caught hold of this, it would truly be a problem.
Parking his car in the private bas.e.m.e.nt, he turned to look at the silent Qiu Yue and sighed. He couldn"t leave her alone. It was such that he didn"t even go up to book a room, straightforwardly calling up his friend and informing him instead.
He gently picked her and hurried to the pens house suite that was free. They had both been drenched wet in the rain, and Qiu Yue already seemed to be burning up, she had seen her shivering on the ride there too.
Even as he sat her down on the sofa, after checking into the room, Qiu Yue didn"t say or do anything. He walked over to the washroom closet to get fresh towels and only then did something stir in Qiu Yue.
It hurt so much, and yet the moment he left her side, Qiu Yue"s heart seemed to pain even more. S his figure came back into her sight, she followed his every move trying to understand why she felt what she did.
He gently dried her hair, then pa.s.sing her the bath robe he told her change into it. Both their clothes weren"t in any condition to be worn right now so it seemed the best option. Qiu Yue gave him a small nod, going into the bedroom and quickly changed into it.
Once she came back out, Qiao Feng felt slight helpless. Even though she"d changed, and the bathrobe was warm and covered her up properly, her hair was still wet and messy and she just stood there looking at him. Sighing inwardly he pulled her along to the washroom, sitting her down on the cushioned chairs near the hair dryer, gently drying her hair for her and Qiu Yue could feel that this moment was very familiar. Too familiar. For some reason it really warmed her heart and made her miss Huo Zi Feng even more.
He"d already asked the staff to send up medicine for fever and light food upstairs, and it was done in a few minutes. First he made sure that she"d eaten some of the congee before letting her take the medicine.
It didn"t take long for the medicine to take effect and she started to feel drowsy. Qiao Feng had already changed into a T-shirt and spare jeans that he kept in his car, quickly eating his... breakfast. Surprisingly it was already morning.
Qiu Yue laid her head on the pillow as Qiao Feng gently pulled the quilt over her, and yet in that moment Qiu Yue couldn"t help but reach out and hold his hand, surprising him. Before he could ask her anything, she"d already closed her eyes and drifted away but the drip on his hand remained strong.
...
Was it wrong that this made him happy?
He knew this was probably because she wasn"t well but... but the fact that she"d taken the initiative to hold his hand really made him happy.
Silently he too got into the bed, next to her, though he left a hollow Grand Canyon worth of s.p.a.ce in between them. He"d searched for her the whole night, as by now the rain had cleared up giving way to a bright sunrise. He too was very tired. Holding her warm and soft hand Qiao Feng looked at her closed eyes for a few seconds. The way her eyelashes rested peacefully on her skin, the way her lips were slightly parted as she slept. After a long time he felt truly comforted as he closed his eyes, drifted to sleep nestled in the warmth.
Qiu Yue started to hear the buzzing of a phone next to her. She laid still trying to fall back to sleep, but sadly it seemed like it wasn"t possible so she sighed lightly, opening her eyes to see his face in front of her, her breathe caught in her throat.
He looked so beautiful in that moment she truly didn"t want to breath, lest that disturb him. Suddenly she realized that her fingers were wrapped around his hand and she was slightly speechless. She bit her lip, confused, and at that moment another buzz made her look around at the phone by his side-table.
Gently letting go of his hand, trying to ignore the emptiness that followed, she got up and went around the bed to take a look at the messages.
Director Min: "Happy birthday. Have a pleasant day."
Stupid Yin: "Happy birthday you dolt! Can"t you even acknowledge me virtually?!!!"
Qiu Yue smiled seeing that message, that was clearly sent by Fan Yin. Did he even know how Qiao Feng had saved his name?
But then this meant that... today was his birthday?
Qiu Yue looked at the man sleeping soundly, that same man that had spent his entire night searching for her. She felt very guilty right now. First of all today was his birthday, and even then her problems had once again fallen on him.
She picked up the phone to check the time and realized it was evening. She coughed embarra.s.sed that they"d slept the entire day away. Then again they"d both been sleep deprived for almost a month. Added to that the events of yesterday... it wasn"t that surprising, actually it was surprising she"d woken up now.
But now that she knew it was his birthday she couldn"t just leave it at that. Going out of the bedroom, Qiu Yue quietly closed the door and picked up the phone in the living room to call for room service. Perks of staying in the VIP penthouse were really unlimited.
After confirming her order, Qiu Yue looked around and was proud to confirm that Qiao Feng had indeed asked the hotel to arrange for simple clothing for the both of them before falling asleep. Picking up something at random Qiu Yue went to the separate bathroom to finally take a warm slow bath.
Lowering herself into the warm water of the bathtub she sighed, comforted. She turned her gaze to the huge window, looking out at the cityscape.
"It isn"t normal."
She murmured. Yes she was lonely and sad, but why was it increasing when she was near Qiao Feng? And why did his presence also simultaneously provide her comfort?
She wanted to confirm something, something very important. She was sure it would work, but she wanted to put some faith in Disney logic. At this point she was ready to try anything, even if it meant relying on the unbelievable.
Yao Yan sighed in annoyance, how long would she have to wait for the results of the scan?
She"d been waiting for it to complete for literally months. Then again, looking at the screen say it would go on for one day more she couldn"t say anything. She"d waited for months, might as well wait one more day.
Suddenly hearing her phone ring, she looked at the name on the display before glaring at the phone and cutting the call immediately.
By the time Qiao Feng woke up, Qiu Yue had already finished up her bath and changed. She sat in the living room flipping through the channels on tv, looking a bit bored.
As soon as he walked into the living room, Qiu Yue turned to him, a bit excited, startling him. He was caught off guard by her sparkling eyes and smile as she looked at him. The sheer contrast to last night was blaring.
But this was because Qiu Yue had decided on something. She"d taken the last bite of hope she had left, and it was fueling her actions. If it worked out then... then she didn"t even know how to imagine how happy she would be, as for if it didn"t work out, she simply couldn"t handle that thought right now.
"Change into something nice! I booked us a private dinner table at the VIP restaurant here!"
Struck by her enthusiasm Qiao Feng could simply manage a bod before he was pushed away into the washroom.
He couldn"t understand why she seemed happier, he just hoped it wouldn"t be short lived.
Qiao Feng had no idea what it was Qiu Yue had prepared for him, but he pleased that the restaurant had a private room booked for them. Not only because he wanted to spend time alone with her, but also because they couldn"t be seen in public, it could lead to a scandal.
Sitting him down in the chair, Qiu Yue skipped out the room, though she was back soon. This time she was pushing a trolley inside, with a huge birthday cake on it.
"Happy birthday"
She smiled softly, but this smile that was from her heart was brighter than any other.
"I- ...you didn"t have to."
But seeing his face, the surprise and hint of happiness in contrast to his words, Qiu Yue felt that she"d finally done something right.
"I did."
She gently closed the door behind her. She"d already told the staff that they wouldn"t order for the time being.
Qiu Yue took a deep breathe.
"...I"m sorry. Because of me you had to go around in the ran. Even though it was your birthday you-"
Seeing Qiu Yue start to apologize Qiao Feng quickly shook his head.
"It"s nothing. I don"t celebrate this day anyways, it"s not that special-"
"It is!"
Qiu Yue frowned at his words.
"Of course it is! It"s your birthday, you- this was the day you were born into this world and for all its faults, it"s still a beautiful place!"
Qiu Yue started to arrange the candles on the cake as she spoke.
"You were born... and that"s why you can live to see this world grow, see people glow with happiness. No?"
She looked at him for a second.
"I never forget to celebrate mine."
She reached for the match stick, lighting the candles one by one. She"d put up 23, and being a big cake it looked fine.
Looking at steady flame on the small candles Qiu Yue felt memories well up.
"No matter how my day went, no matter who knew or celebrated. I would buy myself a cake, a candle and a gift for myself. Even when things got bad and no one was by my side, I still had the small bright flame and that single with my name on it."
Qiao Feng stood up his eyebrows had fallen with her words. He reached out to clasp her hand in his but before he could say anything she turned to him.
"It was my way of telling myself that no matter what I couldn"t regret being born you know?"
Because she"d spoken with so much vigor, having done so many things right after waking up from a fever, Qiu Yue"s body suddenly swayed as she got a bit dizzy, but it didn"t matter as Qiao Feng was already there by her side.
Looking at his eyes, his genuine happiness and now the concern in his eyes Qiu Yue made up her mind.
"We"ll celebrate it every year, your birthday."
She said giving him a small smile. Regardless of what happened, whether it confirmed her thoughts or not, she would celebrate his birthday with him every year.
Qiu Yue sat down in her seat, facing Qiao Feng and gestured at him to blow the candles.
"Make a wish! With my blessing it might just come true!"
Qiao Feng smiled warily, if you are who I need, then will your blessing work even then?
But he didn"t say a thing, quietly blowing the candles out as she still made that seemingly impossible wish.
Qiu Yue and Qiao Feng then proceeded to order dinner and finally at the end of the meal, they both cut into the cake, and yet both the slices adorned Qiao Feng"s plate.
"...what happened to your slice?"
How come I see two on my plate ah?
Qiu Yue"s smile twitched.
"I actually don"t really like cake..."
Qiao Feng was taken aback.
"But didn"t you say you"d buy cake every day...?"
"Yeah but that was for the feel than the taste!"
As they spoke over their meal, Qiao Feng could see Qiu Yue get drowsier by the minute. Her fever hasn"t pa.s.sed yet and anyways even he felt tired. The last month as a whole had been very exhausting.
By the they reached the penthouse suite and Qiao Feng got out of the washroom, Qiu Yue had already crashed on the bed. Seeing her asleep, without any guard, Qiao Feng didn"t know what to do with this girl.
He slowly started to remove her shows as his attention kept straying to her lips, constantly.
How long had he been waiting? To be closer, closer, at least now he was close enough to do something. And yet how could he? The guilt would kill him.
Even as he thought those righteous words, his lips seemed to have a life of their own, and then he felt the softest touch on them.
He"d never believed in those mythical b.u.t.terflies in the stomach, or the electric tension between people, or even how one person could ask another to get addicted. And yet at this moment all these sayings rang true in him.
Because the moment their lips had touched, Qiao Feng had thought that"s he"d felt electricity course through his lips.
Along with that electric moment came a cutest of happiness, and a large amount of guilt.
How could he sleep here in now?