Then you come to know, without being able to tell just how, that He is not only _with_ you, but _within_ you. At first His presence may have seemed as something outside yourself. You were looking away at some One who was looking at you. And His look at you broke your heart, and made your will, once so strangely strong in itself, now as strangely pliable to His as only a strong will can be. But now He is living within you. You may not be clear just how the change came. But you do know that there"s a something which you come to know is a some One, who is within. His presence is peace past understanding, but not past appreciation. There"s a longing for His Word, a desire to talk with Him even when you don"t want to ask for something, a deep heart-cry for purity, a burning within to please Him. These all seem to come from Him, and at the same time to be satisfied by Himself, even while they remain and increase.
And yet more, while this Presence within seems so quietly real and exquisitely peace-bringing, there is still the outer presence, the One whose presence it was at the first that brought all this change. Two presences, one above, enthroned there; one within, enthroned there; yet they seem the same, as though one personality with two presences had come into your consciousness. There"s the Lord Jesus above at the Father"s right hand; here"s the Holy Spirit within at my right hand,[120] yet in practical effect they are as one, while one"s thought is always directed to the Lord Jesus both within and above.
The Presence within makes you think wholly of the Presence above, who yet seems also to be within. You are getting a taste of the practical meaning of the Trinity now, three that in effect are as one. But you are too much taken up with the gladness of it to think about the metaphysics of it.
He--whether within, or above, or both--is so much more than words. The experience is so much more than any explanation. You are not concerned about the explanation so long as you can have the sweet experience.
The Final Goal.
This is the third bit that comes when you"ve seen Christ, the gracious indwelling of the Lord Jesus" other self, the Holy Spirit. But if you have seen Him, you are probably not counting steps nor a.n.a.lyzing processes, but just singing a bit of joyous praise to Him.
Then there"s _the outer turn; He_ does that. He draws you to Himself, and yet at the same time sends you away--no, not _from_ Him--_for_ Him, out to the others He hungers after, even as after you. Up, in, out,--so He draws and directs, up to Himself, in by contrast to one"s self with a holding hard to Him while looking within, then a sending out to the others. He kindles a fire, He is a fire, drawing, burning, cleansing, warming, then driving you forth, and doing all at the same time. Wondrous fine, this fire of love--of His heart--of Himself. The common word for this is "service." The word doesn"t matter much. Service is a good word. But the thing that comes seems so much more than this word seems to contain.
That hand that was pierced, which has been to you so tender and warm, and in its clasp so expressive of this wondrous friendship--that hand now leads you where you had not thought of going. _And you go_,--aghast almost at first at the radical change in your carefully worked out plans, losing your breath for a moment as you wonder what "they" _will_ think (though "they" never will _understand_, unless--ah, yes, unless they see _Him_).
That hand reaches in where your life touches others, in the family, the business circle, the social circle, and moulds you over anew in the old relationships, not taking you away from them (though there may be some partings), but making you a new presence in the midst of them.
That hand reaches into your pocket, and your safety-deposit box, in among the t.i.tle papers and securities, and shakes off the dust and rust, and sends them out on an errand after the others. That fire--Himself--draws all into the smelting-pot. Its alchemy trans.m.u.tes possessions into lives, redeemed, sweetened, Jesus-touched, Christ-renewed lives, made like Himself. And the sweet music of their new lives comes up into _His_ gladdened ears, and a few of the strains come to cheer you. One may have at first a strange feeling of bareness, for things that we"ve always clung to as essential have gone out from us to others. But with the outgoing of things has come an incoming of _Himself_, in greater abundance than we dreamed possible. He, within, completely overbalances what He has sent out from us into use. _He_--He is _everything_.
The usual word for all this is "service," a blessed word. Yet service seems to suggest your doing something for Him among others. This is quite different. It is _His_ doing something _with_ you for others. The thing itself is so much more than any word. Christ is so much more than anything you say about Him. The truth is always less than Himself. But one never understands how much that means till he has seen Christ. Have _you_ seen Christ? Then others shall see Him, too, in you, and through you.
This is the glory of the goal--face to face with Himself. It begins now.
It is a very real thing. This is a bit of the meaning of that mountain beat.i.tude, "the pure in heart ... shall _see G.o.d_." Yet only he who sees understands what seeing means. The subtle intensity of G.o.d"s presence cannot be explained, only understood by the purified in heart. Only the opened eyes see.
But this is only a beginning. There will be the far greater glory of the final goal, as we come into His immediate presence, literally face to face. That may be when we are called away from the lower road up to the higher reaches, above the clouds and the blue, the glory-reaches, up where He now sits. It may be by that goal coming nearer, by Himself actually coming on the clouds in great glory, for His own and for the next chapter in His great world-plan. Then we shall be caught up into His presence.
Then we shall be fully like Him, for we shall see Him as He is.
And we shall be sharers in His glory, in the Kingdom time of glad earth service. But we shall be thinking only of Himself--face to face.