LA ROCHEFOUCAULD, _Reflexions_.

_ON THE HOUSE OF COMMONS_.

When lately Pym descended into h.e.l.l, Ere he the cups of Lethe did carouse, What place that was, he called loud to tell; To whom a Devil--"This is the Lower House."

WILLIAM DRUMMOND (1585-1649).

The working-man is a n.o.ble creature--when he is quite sober.



_Alexis_, in W. S. GILBERT"s _Sorcerer_.

_DEFENDANT"S SONG._

When first my old, old love I knew, My bosom swelled with joy; My riches at her feet I threw,-- I was a love-sick boy!

No terms seemed too extravagant Upon her to employ-- I used to mope, and sigh, and pant, Just like a love-sick boy!

But joy incessant palls the sense, And love, unchanged, will cloy, And she became a bore intense Unto her love-sick boy!

With fitful glimmer burnt my flame, And I grew cold and coy, At last, one morning, I became Another"s love-sick boy!

W. S. GILBERT, _Trial by Jury_.

Dining one day where the host became exceedingly excited and angry at not being able to find any stuffing in a roasted leg of pork, Poole quietly suggested, "Perhaps it is in the other leg?"

J. R. PLANCHe, _Recollections_.

In 1848, Feargus O"Connor was charged in the House with being a republican. He denied it, and said he did not care whether the Queen or the Devil was on the throne. Peel replied: "When the honourable gentleman sees the sovereign of his choice on the throne of these realms, I hope he"ll enjoy, and I"m sure he"ll deserve, the confidence of the Crown."

ABRAHAM HAYWARD, _Essays_.

I loiter down by thorp and town; For any job I"m willing; Take here and there a dusty brown, And here and there a shilling.

I deal in every ware in turn, I"ve rings for buddin" Sally, That sparkle like those eyes of her"n; I"ve liquor for the valet.

The things I"ve done "neath moon and stars Have got me into messes; I"ve seen the sky through prison bars, I"ve torn up prison dresses.

But out again I come, and show My face, nor care a stiver; For trades are brisk and trades are slow, But mine goes on for ever.

C. S. CALVERLEY, _Fly Leaves_.

They may talk of the devotion of the s.e.x, but the most faithful attachment in life is that of a woman in love--with herself.

_Damas_, in LORD LYTTON"s _Lady of Lyons_.

They may talk as they please about what they call pelf, And how one ought never to think of one"s self, And how pleasures of thought surpa.s.s eating and drinking-- My pleasure of thought is the pleasure of thinking How pleasant it is to have money, heigh ho!

How pleasant it is to have money!

_Spirit_, in A. H. CLOUGH"s _Dipsychus_.

Women are generally consistent in their insincerity, if in nothing else.

ANNA C. STEELE.

La plus perdue de toutes les journees est celle ou l"on n"a pas ri.

CHAMFORT, _Maximes_.

Oh, how can a modest young man E"er hope for the smallest progression-- The profession"s already so full Of lawyers so full of profession?

JOHN G.o.dFREY SAXE, _Poems_.

I was speaking [to Charles Lamb] of my first brief, when he asked, "Did you not exclaim-- "Thou great first cause, least understood"?"

CRABB ROBINSON, _Diary_.

Eye-gla.s.s--a toy which enables a c.o.xcomb to see others, and others to see that he is a c.o.xcomb.

HORACE SMITH, _The Tin Trumpet_.

Some brag of telegraphs and rails, Coals, steam, and gas, and a" that, But rattling mails and cotton bales Ne"er made a man for a" that; For a" that, and a" that, Their figures, facts, and a" that, The first of facts is Thought, and what High Thought begets, for a" that!

J. S. BLACKIE, _Musa Burschicosa_.

Virginia city--the wild young metropolis of the new Silver State. Fortunes are made there in a day. There are instances on record of young men going to this place without a shilling--poor and friendless--yet by energy, intelligence, and a careful disregard to business, they have been enabled to leave there, owing hundreds of pounds.

C. F. BROWNE, _Artemus Ward"s Lecture_.

Nothing is accounted so proper in England as property.

_Guesses at Truth._

As the husband is, the wife is,--he is stomach-plagued and old; And his curry soups will make thy cheek the colour of his gold.

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