Rainey was angry, Katie was angry, and this conversation was going nowhere unless they figured out what they were angry about. Rainey knew anger was usually a symptom of a deeper emotion, like fear. The a.n.a.lyst in Rainey watched Katie"s body language. She listened to the tone of Katie"s voice. Rainey needed to be calm and rational, in response. As long as they remained standing and confrontational, nothing would be accomplished.
"Katie, sit down," Rainey said, in her best soothing voice.
Rainey learned something at that moment about women, for which her behavioral a.n.a.lyst job did not prepare her. Never tell an angry woman to sit down. She had faced off men twice her size and told them to sit their a.s.ses down, she had taken control of drug crazed bond skippers, but she would never again tell Katie to sit down during an argument. It had the same effect as throwing water on a grease fire. Katie stood on her tiptoes and let fly with everything that had been bothering her since they met. Rainey could only stand by and watch.
"I will not sit down! I have a few things to say and I intend to stand here and say them. First of all, yes, I did know what you did for a living and I have done my best to accept the fact that every time you walk out that door could be the last, but you take unnecessary risks and that is selfish. Do you ever think about how I feel? You walk around fully armed and alarmed, but you put yourself in situations that are dangerous for no reason. Do you have a death wish? If you do, tell me now, so I can try to fall out of love with you."
"Katie, I..." Rainey tried to say something, but it was no use.
"Second, if you think for one minute I"m going to live the rest of my life in fear, you are sadly mistaken. I will not live like that and you don"t have to, either."
Rainey saw her opportunity to respond. "I don"t take unnecessary risks and I don"t want you to live in fear. I just want you to be cautious and aware."
"Bull s.h.i.t, Rainey. You want me in this cottage where you think you can protect me. I see the apprehension in your eyes every time I get in the car. I have accommodated your fears and stayed close to home, most of the time, but I have been alone about as much as I intend to be. I"m re-entering my life and I won"t be looking at every person I meet as a potential threat."
"So, this really isn"t about me, is it?" Rainey shot back. She could remain calm in the worst of situations, but Katie could make her crazy. Like now, when Rainey should have shut up, but didn"t. "Now that the fog of your trauma is lifting, you can see the future, and you don"t like what you see. Is that it?"
"Don"t a.n.a.lyze me. I did not say I didn"t want a future with you. I said I don"t want to live in fear. We don"t have to. We could leave here and never look back. I have enough money for both of us. You don"t have to risk your life every day... I"m not good cop wife material, Rainey."
Rainey had this conversation, albeit a bit differently, with Bobby. She knew where this was going and the pain caused her to lash out. "You picked a fine time to come to that conclusion."
"We can"t bring a child into this environment of fear and mistrust," Katie said, emphatically.
"Then don"t!"
That was the deal breaker. Katie left the room. Rainey did not follow her. She grabbed a bottle of bourbon from the cabinet and went to the kitchen for a gla.s.s, to await what she knew was coming next.
A few minutes later, Katie came out of the bedroom carrying a suitcase. Rainey couldn"t stop her if she tried, so she didn"t. Rainey stood in the archway to the kitchen, as Katie pa.s.sed without a word. Katie turned at the door, looking back at Rainey. Katie started to say something, but changed her mind. With tears streaming down her face, she disarmed the alarm, opened the door, and walked out of Rainey"s life.
Chapter ten.
Rainey didn"t fall apart when Katie shut the door, at least not right away. She sat on the couch, the open bottle of bourbon on the table in front of her, shot gla.s.s in her hand. She knocked back another shot and watched the minutes tick by on the DVR display. When enough time had pa.s.sed, she picked up her cell phone and dialed Katie"s parents. This was not a phone call she wanted to make, but she had to. After the third ring, Katie"s father answered the phone.
"h.e.l.lo," said the now familiar voice of Timothy Meyers.
"Mr. Meyers, this is Rainey." He had asked her to call him Tim, but it didn"t seem appropriate at the time.
"I suspected you would be calling when Katie arrived here in a puddle of tears. Would you mind telling me what"s going on? We can"t get anything out of Katie, she"s so distraught."
Rainey felt her own tears just below the surface. She was relieved that Katie was safe at her parents" home in Durham, but the magnitude of Katie"s leaving was tearing at Rainey"s heart. She told herself she only had to hold it together a few more minutes. She focused on her mission, and said. "Mr. Meyers..."
He interrupted her, "Please, call me Tim. You"re family, now, even if there appears to be a problem with that, at the moment."
Rainey began again, "Tim, I need to tell you a few things. I"ll let Katie tell you why she left me, but I need you to know that your family isn"t safe."
Suddenly more serious, Tim said, "I"m listening."
"A man I put in prison has information about you and your wife, as well as Katie. He now has a man on the outside who may be coming after me and the people I care about. He has killed two women so far, but I believe, and so does the FBI, that I am his main target. I was informed this evening that he knows who you all are and most likely where you live."
Rainey heard Katie"s voice choked with tears. "If that"s Rainey, just hang up," she shouted, "I don"t want to talk to her."
A searing knife of pain cut through Rainey. It was all she could do to keep from losing it.
She heard Tim say, "Katie, I know you are upset, but I need to talk to Rainey. Please, go back in the kitchen with your mother."
Rainey had to get the rest out, before she lost control. "I"m going to ask the police to put a car in front of your house. I don"t want anything to happen to any of you, because of me."
She could hear Tim breathing on the other end of the phone. She let him absorb the information.
Finally, he spoke, "Rainey, do I need to get my family out of town?"
"That wouldn"t be a bad idea," Rainey answered.
"What about you? Is someone watching you?"
Rainey genuinely liked Katie"s father. His concern for her welfare was characteristic of the kind of man he was. Rainey tried to sound rea.s.suring, when she said, "I"ll be fine. My main concern is Katie and the rest of you. Please watch over her. She doesn"t want anything to do with me right now, and that makes it difficult for me to protect her."
"I"ll keep her safe, Rainey, and I also want to offer a piece of advice. Having been through a few of Katie"s meltdowns in the past, if you will be patient, her brain will re-engage in a day or two. My Katie is a bit hot headed when she"s scared or hurt. Just give her time. She"ll come around. She must care about you deeply to be this upset."
A tear slid down Rainey"s cheek. Her throat tightened and her voice cracked when she tried to speak. "I... I don"t know how to fix this."
Tim spoke to Rainey, as her father would have, with tenderness and knowing in his voice. "This too shall pa.s.s. I wasn"t all that happy when Katie chose to live with you, but I see how you two love each other, and I know whatever caused this temporary separation will work itself out. My advice to you is to catch this guy and then try to fix your relationship. You can"t do both at the same time."
"Yes, sir," was all Rainey could muster. Her tears flowed freely now.
"Don"t worry about Katie. I will make sure the house is locked up tight and the alarm is on."
"Thank you," she choked out. "I"m sorry this is happening."
"This guy after you isn"t your fault. Maybe you were just too good at your job." Tim suddenly chuckled. "And another thing you should know, I"ve been dealing with these emotional Meyers women for a lot longer than you have. Trust me, there will be a calm after the storm."
Rainey was near the end of her ability to hold her tempest of emotions at bay. She had to get off the phone. "I"ll call you when I know something... and Mr. Meyers, load your gun."
"I will. You stay safe."
"Always," was Rainey"s familiar reply.
Tim hung up. Rainey had one more call to make, if she could just hold on. She dialed Danny"s number. He picked up on the first ring. When Rainey heard his voice, the dam broke and all attempts to make a comprehendible sound failed her. Instead, she began to sob.
"Rainey... Rainey... What"s wrong?" Danny asked, alarm in his voice. He received no answer and tried again. "Rainey, are you hurt? Is Katie all right?"
She managed to sputter, "She... she left."
"Where did she go? Is she somewhere safe?"
Rainey took a gasping breath and said, as fast as she could, because it was probably going to be the only coherent words she would mutter for a while, "She"s at her parents" house in Durham. Could you put a patrol car on the house?"
"Yes, I"ll do that right now." Rainey heard Danny turn to someone, barking orders. "I need you to get a patrol car outside of Timothy Meyers" house... No, I don"t know the address. Look it up... Yes, Timothy and Melanie Meyers, Durham... Don"t stand there. Do it, now!" He returned to Rainey. "Rainey, do you need me?"
She stammered out a response, "No... I"m okay... Danny, I didn"t know... I didn"t know it would hurt like this."
Rainey closed her phone and fell into one of the big pillows on the couch. She could smell Katie"s perfume on the fabric, which only made the racking sobs that shook her body more intense, but she couldn"t pull her face from the pillow. The last time she indulged in such self-pity was the day she met Katie, after learning the Y-Man was back. Katie had held her while she collapsed in a shower of tears. This time there was no Katie to soothe her breaking heart. Rainey hugged the pillow to her tightly and completely fell apart.
Rainey was startled awake by a knock on the door, followed shortly by the sound of the door opening and the alarm going off. She jumped off the couch, unable at the moment to understand what was happening. She reached for her gun on the table, where she placed it before pa.s.sing out. A searing pain, from the deep muscle bruise left by the bullet, jolted her from her stupor.
"Stand down, it"s just me."
Ernie"s voice penetrated the fog in Rainey"s hung-over brain. She fell back to the couch and buried her head beneath a pillow.
"Good Lord, what in the h.e.l.l happened here?"
She was near Rainey now. She could see Ernie in her mind, probably standing over her with her hands on her hips. The table in front of the couch was scattered with the remnants of Rainey"s dance with the bourbon devil. The now dried out sandwich lay uneaten beside her Glock. Several gla.s.ses were on the table, progressing from a shot gla.s.s to the tea gla.s.s that had done her in. The only positive thing Rainey could think, at the moment, was thank G.o.d the bottle had not been full.
"I see you"ve been up to your old tricks." Ernie began cleaning up while she reprimanded Rainey like a wayward teenager. "I thought we were past all this. Liquor is not your friend, Rainey. It might have helped in the moment, but look at you now. Bet your head hurts like h.e.l.l."
Ernie carried the empty bottle and gla.s.ses to the kitchen. She continued her one sided conversation, while Rainey remained immobile on the couch.
"You are not a bit of good to anybody in this state. When are you going to grow up and find a different way to deal with problems? So, she left you. Do you think getting drunk is going to get her back? Thank the Lord, Mackie slept in his truck outside. Anybody could have walked up on you last night."
"Getting walked up on," was how Rainey"s father expressed being unaware. He had been walked up on more than once in the jungles of Vietnam. He and Rainey shared the same feral cat defenses, cautious and suspicious, constantly checking the surroundings. Maybe it was because he raised her that way, but those characteristics had served her well. She had forgotten his first rule of defense last night. He would remind her often, "Rainey, always, always be aware. If you see them coming, you got a chance." Rainey wasn"t even aware of what time she finally succ.u.mbed to the alcohol.
"You"re one of the smartest people I know, but you don"t have a lick of sense." Ernie was suddenly standing over Rainey again. "Get up. I brought you a c.o.ke. Go take a shower. I"ll fix you something to eat." Rainey remained motionless. Ernie kicked at Rainey"s foot. "I said get up. You"ve wallowed in self-pity long enough."
Rainey"s m.u.f.fled voice came from under the pillow. "Go away."
"Rainey Blue Bell, I said move!"
Rainey was tall and strong enough to snap this little woman like a twig, but even as Rainey approached the age of forty-one, Ernie intimidated her as if she were still a child. Ernie raised four boys who all grew to be over six feet tall, and mothered Rainey most of her life. She took no c.r.a.p from them as kids and she wasn"t about to take it now. Rainey knew she was fighting a losing battle. She sat up, glaring at Ernie from underneath her now matted ma.s.s of hair.
"You got no one to blame but yourself for the mess you"re in. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and fix it."
Rainey"s voice was scratchy and dry, when she asked, "How did you know Katie was gone?"
Ernie handed Rainey the c.o.ke, saying, "She called me, balling. Neither one of you has the patience G.o.d gave Job to work out your problems. She"s hot headed and you are like a snake when backed in a corner. You always lash out, say things you don"t mean. You"ve been that way your whole life. I called Mackie and he came over here."
The c.o.ke disappeared from the can into Rainey"s mouth; the sugar began to course through her body. She vaguely remembered seeing Mackie"s Escalade show up on the security camera feeds. She was coming around and said, "You haven"t known me my whole life and I stopped acting like a hormonal teenager long ago."
"I know you must have said something hateful. That poor girl is all kinds of torn up."
Rainey remembered what she said to Katie about not bringing a child into this environment, the one thing Katie wanted more than anything. A pang shot through her chest, her stomach rolled over, and she was up and off the couch in a flash. She ran to the bathroom and threw up.
When she could speak again, she gasped out, "f.u.c.k my life!"
She climbed into the shower, careful with her shoulder, and let the water wash away the salty trails of tears from her cheeks. She had to wash her hair with one arm. If Katie were there, she would have done it for her. Katie. What was she going to do about Katie? She tried a dozen different scenarios in her mind, but none of them seemed plausible. She needed to apologize for saying such a hurtful thing, but perhaps it was the truth. Maybe Katie was right not to want to live like this, and certainly bringing a child into Rainey"s life would scare anyone. Rainey was once again faced with the choice of her job or her relationship. After the way Rainey reacted to Katie"s apprehension, there was no way Katie would compromise, now.
Katie wanted a child more than she wanted Rainey. She came as a package deal. Rainey knew that from the start. Katie had been upfront about having a child. She discussed it with Rainey before they committed to a relationship. Rainey said yes, without even thinking. Truly content for the first time in her life, she would have said anything to keep Katie. Rainey remembered holding Katie in her arms and promising they would be happy. They had been, until this week. The stress of building a house, Rainey"s job, Katie trying to get pregnant, and now this a.s.shole out there hunting them had been too much. The polish on Rainey"s perfect world had begun to tarnish.
She climbed out of the shower and dressed in her favorite b.u.t.ton fly jeans, worn thin in all the right places. Her shoulder was stiff and achy, even the water in the shower hurt when it bounced off the now fully bloomed black bruise. The blood just below her skin was already being pulled down her arm by gravity, enlarging the discoloration. She looked in the bottom drawer, where Katie hid all Rainey"s tattered tee shirts, found an old Kitty Hawk Pier shirt, and pulled it on slowly. The tee shirt made her feel close to her father. Fishing all night on the pier was one of their favorite things to do together. She missed him every day. She more than needed him today.
When she arrived in the kitchen she found dry toast, two ibuprofen, and a gla.s.s of orange juice on the table with a note from Ernie. The note said: If you can keep this down, we"ll talk about a real meal. You need to do several things and I suggest you do them in the following order: 1. Eat your breakfast.
2. Focus. There is a killer after you, or did you forget?
3. Call Katie, and apologize for whatever bonehead thing you did.
4. Re-focus, because you can"t think when you talk to Katie.
5. Come to the office. Danny will be here in an hour.
Numbers two, three, and four were the tough ones. Rainey had no chance of clearing her head and calling Katie was going to be a challenge. What could she say? She thought about it while eating her toast. She was still thinking when she finished the last piece of crust. She put food and water down for Freddie, who she presumed was out on his morning stalk. She then wrestled her still damp hair into a ponytail. When there was nothing else she could do to delay the inevitable, she picked up her phone and dialed Katie"s parents" home. She was relieved it was not Katie"s mother, but Tim who answered. She wasn"t up for twenty questions from Melanie.
"Good morning," she said, trying to sound better than she felt.
Tim answered in a cheerful voice, "And good morning to you. I suppose you would like to speak to my daughter, or has something else happened?"
"No, everything is the same as when we last talked. I just need to talk to Katie, if she"ll speak to me."
She could hear Tim moving around. She supposed he was going to ambush Katie with the phone.
"I"m taking the phone to Katie, now. Oh, by the way, the police car is outside. Thank you."