I get an evil look from Marisa who"s trying to keep Hayley still through all the giggles. Too bad. Hayles could ask me anythin" and I"d do it. She"s got me.
"Should I rhyme words with *fart"?"
She laughs again, relaxing under the needle. "I think we covered all those words."
"Did you mention *shart"?" Marisa asks, stifling her own laughter and taking the gun away from Hayley"s skin.
Both Hayles and I go into hysterics. London and Marisa have to wait for us to calm down enough to keep still.
"Didn"t realize we were inking twelve-year-olds," Marisa says with a grin. Hayley throws me a look that gets my stomach twisted. Yeah, I like havin" inside jokes with her too.
Both our tatts only take about thirty-five minutes. I pay for both-because this is a date!-and ignore all of Hayley"s protests and rea.s.surance that she"ll *totally pay me back".
I wait till we"re in the car to ask, "Can I see it?"
Her shirt"s still hangin" off her shoulder, but she"s twisted in a way that I can"t make out her new ink. At first I think she"s goin" to say no, but then she brushes her hair off her neck and turns, so I can get a good look.
I can feel the heat coming from her, but I"m not sure if it"s *cause I"m makin" her nervous or if it"s *cause she"s just been stabbed a million times. The tatt is pretty hot. All right, really hot. So hot I have to adjust myself. Never thought I"d be into a girl who had ink, but lookin" at the smoke lines from the flower going across her shoulder blade and almost touching her neck, dude, I want to run my fingers over it.
I don"t. I learned my lesson.
"Is it that bad?"
I gulp. "No, i-it"s... nice."
Ugh. Lamest compliment ever.
She cranes her neck, resting her chin on her shoulder, her eyes flicking up to meet mine. "I guess that"s good."
"Uh huh."
Just like that, I"m leanin" in to kiss her.
And she leans back, face going as red as mine probably is. "Um, what are you doing?"
Okay, okay, I should give her the benefit of the doubt here. She"s never been kissed, so maybe she doesn"t know what it looks like.
No, that"s stupid. Of course she knows what I was doin". And she doesn"t want me to.
c.r.a.p.
"Sorry, you uh, have an eyelash." And I had to get it off with my lips.
"Oh!" A huge breath escapes her mouth, punching me in the face. I"m a c.o.c.ky b.u.t.t, *cause I expected shock, hesitation, maybe a *I"m not ready yet for that", but not... relief.
Because I can"t deal with another rejection, I snap on my seatbelt and start the car, then do a burnout from the parking lot.
Hayley"s quiet, not singing or playing with the radio. I don"t know how that makes me feel *cause maybe the tension in the air will finally make her get it. But, still, I feel like a jerk for throwin" a fit over it and makin" her uncomfortable on her birthday. And her first date.
c.r.a.p.
"Hey, so you hungry?" I smile, a really big and probably creepy looking smile.
She breaks the tension, another huge breath going out her mouth. "Starving." Then she hits the radio and puts her feet on the dash.
Even though I kind of want to, I can"t stay mad at her. She"s never led me on or anythin". Been pretty clear about where I stand with her.
I"m just p.i.s.sed at myself I guess.
Reason 16: You make me feel all that gooey s.h.i.t c.r.a.p I"m supposed to feel.
Despite that awkward moment in the car, I"m able to just chill with Hayles the rest of the night. After tossing straw wrappers at each other, she dumped the entire salt shaker in my drink. I"m not talkin" about taking the lid off and pouring salt in it, but grabbin" the salt shaker and plopping it in the gla.s.s. Waitress wasn"t too happy, but I was rolling.
After the restaurant-and Hayles stabbing me with her fork when I went after her croutons-she drug me into a grocery store and we picked pretend fights when people walked down the aisle we were in. She bought me a c.o.ke to make up for the one she *salted", and we drove around for about an hour doin" nothing but talkin" about the different ways to say *h.e.l.l".
"Sometimes I say, *what the h?" just like *WTF". People don"t always get it though." She shrugs.
"And they get *holy horse feathers"?" I chuckle as she punches me in the arm.
Pulling into her driveway, I snap off the headlights even though she didn"t ask me to this time. I wish I wasn"t out of money and gas. I"d keep her out all night.
She clicks the seatbelt, and I bolt around the car to beat her to the door. She laughs as she steps out.
"Thanks, Brody."
"Uh huh."
I close the door and walk her up the porch. Part of me wonders if she"ll notice I"m takin" her to the front door, which she"s never allowed before, but she turns around and leaps into my arms so fast again, I"m almost knocked on my back.
"I mean it. Thank you," she says against my cheek. "I told you I haven"t had the best track record with birthdays, and well, this was the best one I"ve had."
What is this girl doin" to me? I squeeze her back, wishing I could keep her locked in my arms forever, but I won"t. The second she gets uncomfortable, I"ll let go.
She loosens her grip, but doesn"t jump away from me. That gives the bruised ego an icepack. Her fingers linger on the tatt on my wrist, and it itches like c.r.a.p. Not goin" to tell her to stop though.
"Hey, Hayles?"
Her eyes flick up to mine. "Sup?"
I smile. "Can I... I mean, can we go out again?"
"Like as friends?"
No.
I gulp. "Another date. I want to..." Grr, why is this so hard? "I want to be with you, Hayley."
I can"t read her expression. She takes a step back, not touchin" me. I"ve never seen her bite her lip, so when it tucks between her teeth I have no idea what it means.
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why do you want to be with me? Is this some kind of pity thing? Because I"m not interested."
Is she for real? "Hayles, you"re killin" me!" I"m not sure what it is. The left over anger from dealin" with Gabe, or the nerves I"ve had all night just tryin" to get the words out, but suddenly I"m sayin" things I"d never-and boy do I mean never-thought I"d say.
"I"ve been tryin" all night with you. It"s hard enough puttin" myself out there, but even harder when I gotta explain myself, but if you need to hear why, then I"ll tell you." I take a deep breath and grab her hand. I"m not going to let her shake me off this time. "I like you, all right? I want to date you not out of pity, but because I... I need to. Hayles, I can"t get you off my mind."
There it is.
Just like that, I"ve vomited all my gushy feelings all over her.
And she"s just staring at me.
Staring and sort-of smiling.
I don"t want one of her sort-of smiles. I want a real Hayles smile. The one that makes her eyes crinkle in the corners.
"W-what about Quynn?" she finally says, her voice just above a whisper.
"I told you. I"m not... she"s not... I don"t feel that way about her anymore."
Her eyes drop to our hands, and she blows out a huge breath. "Holy jumping jellybeans, Brody. When did this happen?"
I chuckle, and it relieves some of the tension in my chest. "What do you mean?"
"I"m trying to rewind here. Find out what exactly was the turning point. What did I do to make you feel like this?"
Ah h.e.l.l, so many things. Too many things to list. I like everythin" about this girl. How can she not see how freakin" awesome she is?
"You"ve got one heck of a personality, Hayles. Plus..." Say it Brody. You"re on a roll. "You"re gorgeous."
My face is red, I"m sure of it, but it can"t be anywhere near the shade of hers.
I"ve so got this. Don"t know why I was so nervous, or why I thought it would be harder than this to convince her. I mean, she looks so...
Wait a minute.
Her eyes are getting watery.
What did I say?
"Hey, what"s wrong?" I ask as I take a step closer to her.
Tears pour down her cheeks as she shakes her head toward the ground.
There"s no way I"m just going to stand here and let her cry. I take her in my arms and hold her. The tension is back in my chest, but it feels good that she"s allowin" me to touch her like this. She sobs into my shirt, but doesn"t wrap her arms around me. I"m okay with that, even though I have no idea what"s going on.
"Hayles, did I say something wrong?" I ask over her head.
She shakes her head, and her voice m.u.f.fles in my shirt. "Brody, I-I can"t believe you."
"What do you mean?"
She pushes away from me and sucks in a large breath. "I can"t believe everything you"re saying to me. I-I"m not going to."
Not sure how to react. Part of me wants to drop it all, forget getting Hayles and go back to Quynn. That"s a p.r.i.c.k of a thing to say, still, can"t help but feel it"d be easier.
Thinkin" about it though, I couldn"t do that. At all. The whole time I"d be with Quynn-hypothetically, of course, since that won"t happen either-I"d want to be with Hayley. And that"s a Gabe thing, not a Brody thing.
I"m a fighter too. And I"ll keep fighting until she gets a restrainin" order.
"Why not?" Rejection sucks. I should at least know why she keeps pushin" me off. "I get it if you"re not into me. Just say the *friend" word, and I won"t bring it up again."
"That"s not it." She sniffs and brushes her hair off her shoulder. "It"s just... what happens when Quynn finally comes around?"
"Huh?"
"Brody..." She plops on the porch, and I take a seat next to her. "Did you forget what I told you about Jason? About why I set the rules upfront?"
"I remember."
"Then why are you doing this to me? Are you really that mean?"
What the h.e.l.l?
"What are you talkin" about?"
"I"m not going to be the girl you use while you wait for the girl to give you the time of day. I thought you were better than that."
She thinks I"m using her? I repeat. What. The. h.e.l.l?
"I"m not like that."
She rolls her eyes. "You"re saying you actually want to be with me, when you could have someone like her? Yeah, okay."
I"m starting to get p.i.s.sed. This girl doesn"t get it. Doesn"t get how amazin" she is. How much I"ve been panting over her since we started hangin" out. How many times I chose her over Quynn already.
"I told you, I don"t want Quynn. I want you."
She c.o.c.ks an eyebrow, folding her arms and leaning on her knees. "And how many times did you think about her tonight?"
I do a mental checklist *cause I want to be honest. Thought about her before I got to Hayley"s house, but I was also thinkin" about Hayles. Other than that...