UNFAITHFUL.
If he loves and respects you, he wont cheat. If he does cheat, one or both of the above is missing.
Its Not An Accident Cheating is never an accident;
it is a conscious decision.
The unfaithful often refuse to accept personal responsibility for their actions and instead, they resort to trying to make you feel as if somehow your actions or inactions are to blame. Dont buy into it! It is never your fault. It was their choice to cheat; therefore, they shoulder 100% of the blame. If there was something you were or were not doing that was causing so much of an issue, they should have come to you first. If the issue couldnt be resolved, they had one of the following two choices to make: leave then or stay and try to work it out. Either way, cheating on you should not have been one of those options.
His Apology When he apologizes, just know that he is not sorry that he cheatedhes sorry you found out.
In some cases, he may feel as if an apology should suffice; however, an apology, at this point, is like throwing salt on an open wound. Why? Because apologies are for accidents or for when someone does something and, at the time, they had no idea it would hurt you.
Cheating, on the other hand, is a conscious decision, thus ruling out the idea that it was an accident. Plus, at the time he cheated, he knew that his actions would hurt you; thereby ruling out the argument that he didnt know.
So, you may ask, why is he actually apologizing? Ill tell you. Its not because he cheated and its not because he hurt you. He is sorry that you found out; thats the one thing he didnt plan for.
You Believe The Lies You believe the lies because youre afraid of the truth.
So when he feeds you the lines
about where hes been all night,
youve preconditioned yourself to believe the lies
to be true.
While deep down inside you fight with yourself,
going back and forth as you pray for help.
So maybe my inspiration for this book was divine
or maybe it was something I picked up in your
Comments while reading between the lines.
We all have our suspicions but my advice to you,
is you should listen to your conscious
thats G.o.ds way of talking directly to you.
The Feeling Of Betrayal When a man cheats on a woman, its not so much the physical act that hurts her; its the feeling of her being emotionally betrayed by the one person she loved and trusted to never to do such a thingthats what hurts the most.
NOTES:.
List the top 3 signs from the past, that you ignored, which warned you that he was cheating and promise yourself that you will never ignore these signs again.
CHAPTER.
Seven.
SECOND.
CHANCES.
Some people get a second chance while others dont because some people are willing to change while others wont.
Just Because You Miss Him Just because you miss him, doesnt mean you should take him back.
Its okay to miss him; thats normal. Every relationship has its good moments and those moments often create great memories. Just remember, you left for a reason. And at the time you left, that reason outweighed those memories. Now, Im not saying you should never give someone a second chance. There are times when people change and its up to you as to whether or not you believe their change is enough for you to take them back. However, dont let loneliness, or the fact that you miss them, cloud your judgment to the point where you find yourself back in the same bad relationship you just got out of.
Forgiveness Doesnt Always Equal A Second Chance Just because you are willing to forgive him, doesnt necessarily mean he gets an automatic second chance.
Your willingness to forgive him shows that you are strong enough to be able to move forward without holding it against him. That doesnt necessarily mean you are willing to put yourself back in the same situation for him to hurt you again.
Your decision to give him a second chance should be largely based on whether or not you believe whatever has happened will happen again. If you think it wont, then ask yourself if that alone is a good enough reason to go back into the relationship. If you believe it will occur again, walk away now before you have to run away later.
NOTES:.
List all of the reasons why you believe you should give him a second chance.
List all of the reasons why you believe you should not give him a second chance.
Now compare both lists and make your decision based on whats best for you.
CHAPTER.
Eight.
YOU CANT
CHANGE HIM.
h.e.l.l only change if he wants to change; my question is, if you dont like the man he is today, why are you with him now?
The Reason He Changes You cant change a man, but you can definitely be a big part of the reason he decides to change.
For some men, all they need is a reason to change; the right woman, at the right time, in the right mans life, could very well be that reason. But be careful, the wrong man will not be able to recognize you as a good woman and he will take your time and waste it. h.e.l.l act like hes changed for just long enough to get what he wants from you. After hes accomplished his goal, he will revert back to his old ways leaving you physically, emotionally and, in some cases, financially drained.
Some of you have dealt with this man in the past, while others are still dealing with him now. You may even begin to doubt yourself and think theres something wrong with you. Rest your mind; its not that you arent the right woman, its just that he is the wrong man.
The Real Problem Sometimes, him being the wrong man isnt the real problem. The real problem is you deciding to give him a chance, knowing hes the wrong man, thinking you can change him.
Never go into a relationship thinking you can change a man that has already shown you his true intentions are not what you want.
In the end, he wont change and youll end up frustrated, heartbroken, and alone wishing you had done things differently.