Chapter 781: The Last (14)
It had been a while since I last felt like my head had gone blank.
The current situation was just as disconcerting as when I realized Lee Kiyoung’s existence before erasing his memory.
It wasn’t that I had stage fright or the cheers of the believers were burdensome. Honestly, I just didn’t know what to say.
Everything was making me fl.u.s.tered.
Of course, it wasn’t what I originally planned, and I wanted to applaud the Blue Guild members who drove me to this point. I couldn’t help but seriously wonder how it was possible to screw with someone without any malice.
‘If I knew it would turn out like this, I would’ve come sooner.’
I really didn’t want to be the shameful G.o.d who came down for a bag.
Looking around, I noticed everyone was crying.
Some people sent cheers, but it seemed that the true image of a saint who gave his all for the continent stole the tears of the crowd. Divinity continued to acc.u.mulate.
Even the small prayers poured out nonstop.
‘Wow, f.u.c.k. What’s wrong with the ones praying to win the Crack Land jackpot or get admitted to an adventurers’ college? The Saint of Light has appeared, and they have nothing else to pray for? They’re pretty practical, though.’
Of course, the Blue Guild members who looked more pa.s.sionate than anyone else stood out above the rest.
Cho Hyejin cried without moving. She kept trying to move her lips, showing she had a lot to say, but words couldn’t seem to come out properly.
Elena had her head lowered to the sudden advent instead of looking at the statue properly.
She might be thinking that directly looking at a G.o.d’s eyes is sinful and disrespectful.
Yoo Ahyoung and Kim Chang-ryul were rubbing their eyes. That was probably the first time I saw Kim Chang-ryul, who couldn’t display emotions well, react so expressively.
Jung Hayan and Park Deokgu, who witnessed yet another miracle, responded the same way as the last time I talked to them.
Oscar, who was a little far away, was praying with her hands clasped together, and the new guild member Alps was more adroit, showing the best example of how to react to everyone else.
Most people got down on their knees and sang songs of praise to me.
‘It looks sacred even in my perspective. It’s a mythic-grade statue, which must be why the effects are so amazing.’
“…”
‘I think it would’ve been more plausible if I didn’t come down after they offered me a bag…’
The statue’s eyes, made of the jewel of the sun and the pebble of the fairy lake, emitted a subtle light, and the effect of the sunset sky illuminating the stone statue was divine.
Just being surrounded by the holy light itself would be enough to feel awe, but an even grander image was painted due to the surrounding environment’s help.
The problem was that I didn’t know what to say to them.
I didn’t know what to say to Kim Hyunsung, who was sitting down and crying profusely.
Of course, it wasn’t that I didn’t have anything to say to him, but what I wanted to talk to him about was something private.
What should I officially say in front of so many believers?
If the reason why I called him was small and weak, I wondered if it would take the wind out of their sails. Wouldn’t my followers think of it as weird?
I couldn’t just say, ‘How are you doing, Hyunsung?’
‘I’m going crazy. f.u.c.k.’
-Kiyoung… Can you see me?
“…”
-I… really… I mean… I…
He seemed unable to speak coherently, probably since he couldn’t hold back his emotions.
I had a warm smile on my face, but I wasn’t sure what to say.
The same went for Kim Hyunsung. I didn’t think his confused feelings were particularly strange. He was the person who sent me to my death.
It would be right to say h.e.l.lo first.
“Long time no see, Sunset Swordsman.”
My voice flowed quietly.
-Kiyoung…
He noticed my formal tone, but he soon realized he didn’t have the right to be disappointed, so he nodded slowly.
-Yes, it’s been a while, Lee Kiyoung.
“…”
-There are so many things I want to say, but I don’t know where to start. I’m curious about how you’re doing and if you’ve been well, but I know better than anyone that I have no right to ask you that. However…
“…”
-However…
He quietly lowered his head and then continued.
-How you’ve been doing?
That remark alone probably took him a lot of courage to ask.
That probably was what he was most curious about, but that was hard to answer.
Usually, I wouldn’t have trouble answering such a question, but I had to think again about whether it was right to talk about something so personal in that situation.
I called Hyunsung the Sunset Swordsman for a reason. The moment I was about to speak up, he opened his mouth again.
Since I came down, I had to say something, but he kept taking my turn as if he had a lot to say. And he was doing it in a very bad way.
-I’m sorry.
“…”
-Sniff… Sniff… I’m… I’m sorry. There are so many things I want to say… I’m sorry. Really… I’m really sorry. I wanted to see you again. I knew you were always watching over me, but I wanted to apologize in front of you.
“…”
-I know that just because I said sorry doesn’t mean that the sins I’ve committed will go away…
‘He’s out of his mind.’
-I know that this is just a selfish act to relieve the burden in my heart, even a little…
Kim Hyunsung was more idiotic than I thought.
-What I’ve done…
“Stop.”
-…
“Please stop it.”
‘Does he want to die?’
It seemed that he was trying to confess about stabbing Lee Kiyoung in the middle of such an event. I knew he was kind of slow, but he was worse than I thought.
‘Do you want to die by being stoned to death?’
As expected, amid the murmurs being heard, some had questions about the sins committed by the Sunset Swordsman.
There was no way they wouldn’t have doubts. They were bothered that Raphael wasn’t showing up and was curious about the things that weren’t explained to them.
There were still suspicions circulating about Lee Kiyoung’s death, and various conspiracy theories were likely to arise.
Confessing in such a situation was no different than suicide. Perhaps even the Blue Guild would drive him out.
‘Don’t say that.’
“You did not commit any crimes or sins heavy enough to infer anyone’s wrath. You are not a sinner but a hero who saved the continent and the guardian who has kept the radiant sunset light safe. Everything was as destined, thus inevitable.”
-However…
“Don’t shed tears, Sunset Swordsman. Don’t shed tears for the victims. Oh, wounded heroes. Don’t let their sacrifices be in vain. They may not stand in the same place as you do, but they sit on the right side of Benignore and watch the continent they have protected with their own hands.”
-Oh, G.o.d…
-Ohh… Benignore. Ohhh… Lee Kiyoung…
“They are with me with pride in protecting their family, friends, colleagues, and lovers.”
Of course, I didn’t know where the dead were. I just needed to say something like that. It was just a pure white lie anyway. They were all in heaven and living happily.
“What you have to do is not to wallow in sorrow but to move forward. You have to let go of the feelings of affliction and guilt that you are burdened with.”
‘You know you really can’t let go of it, though, right? Right?’
-However…
“Please let it go.”
-I can’t… let it go. Sniff… There’s no way I could let it go.
‘That’s the right att.i.tude. f.u.c.k. That’s the att.i.tude. Never let it go. f.u.c.k. You can’t let go of your guilt. That’s my weapon, after all.’
“Let it go. You can move on. You all can. You deserve to be happy.”
I just said anything that came to mind, but it seemed that even Cho Hyejin got influenced by it. She was also buried in guilt, so I wondered if my words would comfort her a little.
I could see her sitting down and crying. She was crying so melancholically that she couldn’t properly control herself. In the end, Alps popped out in front of her and managed to take care of her.
-Kiyoung… I am… I am…
“Don’t settle down. Looking back is not wrong, but letting yourself live in the past isn’t what you should do. It is righteous to admit one’s sin, but it is not right to be buried by it. Rather than being devoured by sadness, free yourself from your pain. It is the little lights that you cherished that illuminate the future unfolding before your eyes.”
‘You can be buried a bit in sin. It doesn’t matter if you fall in sadness and stop looking around a little. Just don’t forget about me. Got it?’
It seemed that I wouldn’t have to worry. Just by looking at Kim Hyunsung’s face, I could tell what that b.a.s.t.a.r.d was thinking.
He didn’t agree with my words. His spirit of resistance, showing he would never follow my words, stood out.
That was the right reply. I wanted to applaud it.
I was worried about what to do if he expressed his disagreement right at that moment, but he didn’t seem to have set foot on the path of rebellion.
“I am always watching you all. What kind of continent you will make, what kind of life you will live. I look forward to each day…”
-Kiyoung should enjoy it with us too. Sniff… Sniff…
“…”
-You must enjoy it with us. It should be Kiyoung here, not me. Sniff… Don’t you know better than anyone that I do not deserve this?! Let go of me! I told you to let go! Sh*t!
‘This b.a.s.t.a.r.d is agitated. I’m getting scared… Didn’t we conclude this talk last time?’
He had been patient with it for a long time, but in the end, he couldn’t stand it.
The surrounding priests didn’t know what to do. The priests were holding Kim Hyunsung, but it was impossible for them to calm him down.
He seemed unaware of the blasphemy he was committing. No, he couldn’t even see or consider what was around him.
The scene he was expecting wouldn’t have been a scene like this. He might have thought I came to give him hope that I could be resurrected.
That was probably why he looked bright earlier. He might have been happy that he was my soulmate, but wasn’t it mainly because of his hope that he might be able to grasp a slight possibility of returning me to the continent?
He didn’t expect to be told to forget everything and move on.
-I’ll definitely get you back. I will. I’m going to return Kiyoung to his rightful place. Sniff… Sniff… I would never let it end like this. n.o.body wants this ending. I’ll do everything to get you back. The Blue Guild and I will.
‘Good att.i.tude.’
But speaking of such things during such an event wasn’t appropriate…
-I will bring Kiyoung back to life. I will bring you back to life at any cost. I don’t care which method I use. Even if I have to give my all…
I thought it would be better to ignore him. It might be a little insufficient, but I had to do what I needed to do.
“I… I forgive your sorrows and sins.”
A huge beam of light fell from the sky. Of course, I didn’t really forgive their sins, but I thought it would be rewarding for them if there were such an effect.
As expected, the believers quietly bowed their heads and accepted the brilliance, while Kim Hyunsung spread his wings and prevented the beam from reaching him.
He was blocking the light over and over until the moment I slowly disappeared.
-…
-…
-Who can forgive sadness and sin at will? Move on? That’s really funny. You can forgive them all you want, but I’ll kill them all. Until I go back to the beginning, I will devour everything until there isn’t even an ant left.
As I looked down at Lindel, I saw Lee Jhye with masked people.
-I’ll kill everyone.