Just a few seconds away and I already felt at lost for not feeling his warm body against mine, dummy me.Sigh, like this I won"t be able to hold on much longer…
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But is that a bad thing?
We were, after all, going out… dating… wait, we were dating? That means, like, that Leo is my boyfriend? Boyfriend… I tasted the word in my mouth, and suddenly felt very giddy for some reason.
Ereinion Calien Leonel, my boyfriend.
I liked the sound of that.
I felt like a messy puddle of nerves; some part of me wanted him so bad that scared me, of how quickly it was to give him all of me, but the other part still believe this was a mistake, that it wouldn"t work out, that he would leave me, that… I don"t know, that I did not trust him?
Deep down I think I don"t trust anyone… not even my brother, that"s why I study so much, that I work hard so much, so I can take charge of things, that I do what needs to be done, not needing help of anyone…
It that it? What was bothering me so much?
No… I shook my head to the sides as I start to melt the rock out of me, no relations.h.i.+p will work without trust, that"s why a betrayal from their part hurts so much, like an open wound right to the heart.
But I promised myself I would give us a chance, so I would have to risk opening my heart to him and letting him make a nest in it, and if he betrayed me like her…
Well, I was not the same person as before, nor as innocent, nor as weak.
I was the Terror for a reason, he should know better than mess up with me.
So we would talk and I would let myself enjoy my boyfriend as I let him enjoy me. I thought about doing what he did to me, nibbling his soft long white neck, his tender skin, biting lower and in places far more sensitive than the neck… having me pleasure him.
That would be a bliss.
Oh G.o.d please don"t leave us alone for long again, otherwise I don"t know what will happen next, without an excuse, without a rock in the middle, with me wanting it.
Oh yeah I wanted him alright.
Ok, ok, that"s enough otherwise I will have to deal with another problem in the water before going out, and I"m too tired for it.
In the end I took a quick bath, not even entering the little pool, only pouring water from the bucket, using my shadow tentacles to bring it back and forth, and I put my pajamas on, a single long light baby blue tunic with a thin cloth that left my legs exposed and my lower part free to catch a wind.
Rubbing my eyes I go to the balcony only to see Leonel sitting there, looking at the starts, two warm mugs beside him.
I stop for a second to appreciate his wide back and golden hair, biting my lower lip slightly and walking towards his side, sitting down beside him as he gives me a warm smile, watching outside as a soft rain starts to pour down and bring forth the smell of wet soil and leaves that makes me take a deep breath.
We stay like that for a while beside each other on the balcony, legs stretched out hanging over the railing as a soft rain dribbles over the rooftops, the drops of clear water rolling down in front of us and giving the garden an even more surreal look.
I think back on what I wanted to talk about, something that was related to the story I told back at the fire, the fact that that story was true, and a lot more than that, the fact that I…
Well, I should just open my mouth and say it, right?
I turn my face towards Leo after a long time in silence, thinking, mouth open, about to speak, only to receive a kiss on the lips. Different from the other times, even being caught by surprise, I do not flinch back, which brings a smile on his lips as I start to kiss him back, somehow needy without being forced, paced slowly yet surely.
"Don"t talk about it tonight." He says after our lips part. "You don"t seem… ready. And I prefer to enjoy the moment, this beautiful night, and the day that you said yes to me."
I chuckle. " You make it sound like we are marring or something."
"Is as important to me."
"Oh, is that so? What that would do to your reputation uhm? Being married to a man; rather, to a male beast even."
"Reputation? Is that what worries you? You amaze me, my little hound." He says, biting on my lower lip and giving little pecks before continuing. "I"m known as an ex-royal, ex-prince, sp.a.w.n of the devil, half-elf half-human, beyond many more, and yet you worry about my reputation? That"s sweet of you." I puff my cheeks at that, turning my face away.
"Well, sorry if my worries seemed little to you, childish even, you almighty high royal a.s.s." I say, trying to sound mad but my smirk gave away as Leo raises his eyebrow and pa.s.ses me the mug.
I look down into the mug only to see a golden honey drink that smelled nice and set cozily in my hands. I see Leo blowing the steam off from the hot beverage, but I could simply sip the hot drink as a spicy flavor hit my tongue together with the warmth, plus truly some sweet honey flavor with lemon and Earl grey tea, a mixture that I would never come up with but ended up pretty well.
It may be strange to put spicy in this drink for others though, but for my palate it was as if putting the secret ingredient that always worked out for me.
Just wonderful.
"Yours is spicy too?"
"…No."
"Did you come up with these recipes?"
"I asked around, you would be surprised on how people from different places have such different yet delightful cuisine."
"You really enjoy cooking don"t you?"
"Uhm… it was a necessity at one point, but I grow found of it."
I did not push his b.u.t.tons, wanting for the conversation to stay light… thought my dumb brain came with the weirdest subjects to fill the silence.
"Tell me… what made you like me?"
"Uhm… I wonder…?" I scowl at him as he chuckles, coming closer and hugging my shoulder with one arm, bringing my body closer to his. Even if he didn"t do anything, his warmth on my side and back made my heart race.
"Well, how about that? I will answer you if tell me your answer."
"What? What I like on myself? Well, for starts, I-"
"Oi." He says, poking me on the side, making me giggle. "You are too sensitive for your own good."
"T-that we can agree on."
I don"t say anything as he turns and looks at me. "So?"
"So what?"
"Your answer…"
I stop teasing him to really think on what to say as his fingers trace my shoulder, and it doesn"t take long for the words to come naturally; after all it was something I had been wondering myself for the last few days.
"Well, you are charming, gentle, caring, but can be a brute when needed, you respect me and my decisions, you don"t force your will on others, and yet carry the weight of all with upmost strength and-"
I stop at that before he changes his mind about respecting my pace, making me pout my answer in.
"Y-you know, t-that kind of stuff, though don"t start thinking to full of yourself alright?"
"Hahah, no, of course not. My turn… right?"
"Well, you don"t need to answer if you don"t w"
"There are many things that I love about you. Your smile, your laugh, the way your eyes s.h.i.+ne under the moonlight, the way you are compa.s.sionate towards those you care, how you-"
"Ok, ok, that"s enough." I say, looking out in the rain trying to hide my smile.
We stay in a comfortable silence once more, watching the rainfall, making me very sleepy, especially after such a warm drink.
"You know…" Leo starts, making me hum for him to continue. "Should I give you a ring?"
I almost choke my drink up with that statement.
"W-what? W-why? We are not marring."
"Is not that; though I wouldn"t mind it; but a ring on the right-hand means compromise, not marriage, just a way to say we are dating."
The last word, rolling down his lips, making me hold down a goofy smile that wanted to show on my face, though my tail wiggled a little. "I don"t know…"
"Well, I"m not a prince anymore, so I can"t make you my queen… but I can still give you a fitting ring."
"Oi oi, who said I would be a queen uh?"
He just chuckles. "I"m just teasing you."
"I know, dummy dum."
"And we still kind of look like royals… we are just building our own empire from the ground right?"
He shrugs. "Don"t know, but you will still be the queen, you are already wearing a dress."
"Oh, shut up" I say, punching him on the shoulder loosely. "And this is a tunic, a tu-ni-ccc"
"Uhum, if you say so…"
I stayed longer in his embrace, almost falling asleep, as I hear his husky voice say:
"Thilgon… can I ask you a favor?"
"Uhm? Right now…?"
"Uhum, can you… can you sing for me? You did it all the time on the other time, and it has been so long since I heard you… Please?"
At this point I was far more asleep then aware of what was happening around me, so I simply hear the word sing and let my mind flow at ease, my voice coming low and sleepy, singing in a way one would do to coax a child to sleep, slowly and lowly:
"A prince, a demon, a man, a beast~
Many t.i.tles, many names
Try to weight you down beneath dignity~
And yet you stood above, never loaded out
Chose your name, chose your path
Never let them tell you how to act now
In a river full of sharks, you stood as a dragon~
So no little sharp teeth could do you harm
So that your neck above the water stood
As those that try to drown you down soon learn that you were born in the water
And yet your jaws were gentle
And yet with your claws you could support
For your kind soul could not be hindered by others
That love was stronger than hate in your heart
That you chose the path of light instead of darkness
That you chose to be grateful instead of complaint
That you chose the path of love…"
~And me; My mind finishes the song, but no final words came out of my mouth as my eyes shut and my breath even as I fell asleep beside his comfortable warm body, feeling secured and cared for, feeling that I was where I belonged to.
In his arms.
****
They are so sweet together aren"t they? I wonder how I can mess things up…
Heheh.
BTW, today is 13 on a Friday with a full moon in sight, which dance are we going to perform tonight to celebrate at midnight?
Haha, just joking. 〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜
See ya next Friday!