Chapter 133 – The Greatest Thing Is Love (2)
After an hour or so, Rashta fell asleep next to Sovieshu. He had a maid bring in a cus.h.i.+on, and he placed it against her head before quietly leaving the room. Normally he would have carried her to bed, but he didn’t want to do it today. He pitied Rashta for being separated from her baby, but he was reluctant, knowing that she lied to him.
He opened the door to the corridor, but instead of going back to his bedroom, he looked around.
“?”
Was it an illusion? A familiar fragrance seemed to linger in the air. It was the scent of the rose bath which the Empress enjoyed. After a moment of thought, Sovieshu called for Viscountess Verdi and the maids.
“Did the Empress come visit?”
“We haven’t seen her, Your Majesty.”
Sovieshu shook his head, and he left thinking that the Empress hadn’t been there. As he made his way down the dark corridor, he recalled what Marquis Karl had said to him earlier in the day.
“Why don’t you tell the Empress your plan in advance? Even if you plan to eventually reinstate her to her position, she will be surprised and hurt by your actions.”
“If I could, I would.”
Sovieshu clicked his tongue. He well understood Navier’s strong pride, as well as the lack of affection for Rashta’s baby. Navier would not be able to accept Sovieshu leaving her to protect a baby she didn’t like.
***
My vision swam before me, and there was a strange ringing in my ears. I concentrated on moving my feet. Left, right, left, right in order, though my legs could barely support me. I had to stop several times and lean against a wall before I finally made it to my room. I sat by a window and recalled what I had heard.
Sovieshu…Sovieshu had promised to make Rashta empress.
After he divorced me, he would make Rashta empress…
His friendly voice.
Rashta’s excited voice.
Voice voice voice!
My chest ached to the point that breathing was painful. I leaned back, my hand resting on my heart.
I had never considered it an option that Sovieshu would try to divorce me. It was true that we weren’t married for love, and we had fought because of Rashta in recent times, but didn’t we have anything that could be called friends.h.i.+p?
What happened to those times when we used to put our heads together and planned to make the country strong? We were a couple, so where in the world did that man go? Was my brother’s dislike of Rashta and her baby so intimidating to Sovieshu? What would happen to me if we were divorced?
The words of Grand Duke Kapmen came to my mind. If I divorced Sovieshu, I would no longer be empress. I thought his words ridiculous at the time. Now Sovieshu really did want to divorce me…
I clenched my hands and tucked my forehead onto my arm. After a while like this, I managed to stand up and head for the study. I took out a book on the brief history of the Eastern Empire, and brought it to my room to scour it.
A commoner concubine…empress…
“…”
After studying the book back to front, I put it down in dismay. There was no case where an emperor took a commoner concubine as his first marriage. However, there had been occasions when a commoner became empress after the original died or was ousted. It was rare, but there was precedent.
‘What will become of me now?’
I closed the book, put it on the table, and took a deep breath. I didn’t know how long I remained in that state, and when I opened my eyes again, the red dawn was glowing palely through the curtains. My eyes stared at the view, but everything felt hopeless.
No matter how hard I lived, however hard I tried, love was the only great thing in the end. The romantic words of minstrels rang true, and the central driving force of the world was love. Because of Sovieshu’s and Rashta’s pa.s.sion for each other, everything I had was taken away. Our important families, the time we spent together, the long work and education, and even the vows we exchanged, was consumed by another greater love.
“Oh my G.o.d, Your Majesty!”
Countess Eliza, who came in with another maid to prepare me for my bath, cried out in dismay when she saw my pallid complexion. She ordered the maid to fill up the bathtub, and then hurriedly approached me.
“Did something happen, Your Majesty?”
I stared at her with heavy eyelids. She looked like a silhouette of white after I had gazed at the sun for a long time.
“Oh my word.”
I knew I was in a bad state. Countess Eliza looked around, and became further confused when she found the history book on my desk. It was strange for someone to become depressed after reading up on history.
“By any chance…does it have to do with Lord Koshar?”
Countess Eliza looked at me with concern, and I replied in a blank voice.
“Yes.”
I stood up from my seat, taking note of Countess Eliza’s bewildered expression. I realized that was not the time for me to be like this, and I couldn’t allow myself to be sorrowful if I was soon to be ousted. Even if Sovieshu was considering divorcing me, it wouldn’t be today.
And if he did go through with the divorce, I had no choice in the matter anyway. There was no empress who could go against the emperor’s wishes, no matter if she came from the greatest family, or if she was a terrifying empress, or even if she gave birth to a great successor. The best I could do was stall the trial. Most importantly, I had to come up with a way to survive afterwards.
“Today…please give me a pink dress.”
I took a quick bath and asked Countess Eliza to make me look as bright as possible. She masked my sunken eyes with makeup and clothed me with a beautiful pink dress to throw off the gloomy atmosphere. Sovieshu didn’t know that I heard his conversation, but he was probably thinking of me. He probably whispered his promises to Rashta all night. I didn’t want to show him that I was defeated.
Meanwhile, Countess Eliza helped me select my jewelry, then she informed me that she would send my letter to Evely by eleven o’clock this morning. After I listened to her, I decided instead it would be better to see Evely in person. Moreover, my heart had been somewhere else when I wrote that letter, so my true feelings weren’t expressed. I thought it would be better to comfort the child myself.
“Don’t post the letter. I’ll go see her myself.”
Afterwards, I went to the audience chamber as calmly as possible. As soon as I approached it, however, my heart started to pound again. The shocking news I heard yesterday rushed into my head once more—of Sovieshu promising his love to Rashta, of how he would throw me away.
Sovieshu was set on divorcing me. I wondered how he would see me and treat me.
“The bright colors look good on you.”
Unexpectedly, he was no different from usual. Because of that, I was able to find my usual composure. Being in the same room as him still unsettled me, but at least I could outwardly project calm in front of him.
I smiled and thanked him for the compliment, then I ignored the hand he held out for me and walked up to my seat.
“Didn’t you see my hand?”
“I pretended not to see it. Please ignore me.”
“…Is this because of your brother?”
“I want to get some air.”
“Shall we go for a walk?”
“I’m going to Wirwol to see Evely.”
“Wirwol? When? It will be a tight schedule planning for it now.”
“Don’t worry. I plan to go alone.”