Chapter 139 – I Liked Him More Than I Thought (2)
A few days later, I made my return trip to the Imperial Palace. I recalled my agreement with Heinley. He would give me the position of queen, and I would give him my experience as a ruler.
However, when I considered the idea more calmly in the carriage, I felt regret. He had accepted my proposal, but what if he came to reason now? No matter how happy he was, this deal was a loss to him. If a rumored womanizer like himself were to marry me, the scandal between us would erupt and spread throughout many countries. For a monarch who has to throw away his old, frivolous image and take on a dignified weight and figure, this wouldn’t be a nice matter.
Furthermore, marriage between foreign monarchs was usually done with the intent to create a political alliance. I couldn’t expect that after divorcing Sovieshu. Meanwhile, my family, well-known for producing the empress of the Eastern Empire, could not help Heinley with the domestic politics of the Western Kingdom.
‘If he doesn’t change his mind, then I must simply do my best.’
Fortunately, I had some advantages that would help Heinley. I would be compared opposite of him. My cold judgment would balance Heinley’s free-spirited image. I could use my experience as empress to empower his position…
‘Rwibt!’
Yes, Grand Duke Kapmen had said he would continue to look for diplomatic partners. Perhaps we could arrange a relations.h.i.+p between the Western Kingdom and Rwibt!
As I thought about what I would do after going to the West, I shook my head and took a deep breath. I wasn’t sure how far Heinley planned for this, and I was getting ahead of myself.
Finally, the carriage stopped, and I took out my hand mirror to freshen up my face.
‘If Heinley marries me and then falls in love with another woman, it won’t be as difficult as with Sovieshu.’
Just then, a sudden realization struck me hard on the back of the head, and I lost my composure. When the knight came around to help me out of the carriage, he looked at me in surprise.
“Your Majesty! Are you all right?”
I took the knight by the arm to balance myself, and I put on a smile and a.s.sured him that I was fine. However, the sudden thought I had made me feel dizzy. The carriage door closed behind me, and as I walked with the knight, I heard greetings from various people here and there. I strolled down the corridor feeling utterly hollowed out, while I gradually began to come to terms with my realization.
I…
I liked Sovieshu.
I didn’t know if there was a distinction between love as a man and woman or the friends.h.i.+p we shared for a long time. But I liked Sovieshu very much. Even more than I thought.
“…”
Admitting it didn’t make any difference. I did not intend to remain with him simply because I liked him.
***
“Your Majesty! The Emperor has sent Lord Koshar away!”
However, despite the realization of my affection for Sovieshu, the wounds only grew deeper. I couldn’t cling to him. I had to find a way to protect what I had left.
The news that he had banished my brother made me ache with pain and loneliness. Did Sovieshu have any affection for me anymore?
“Did you hear where His Majesty went?”
“I don’t know. It happened so suddenly…”
Countess Eliza was crying as she told me the news, while Laura paced around the room. I buried myself in an armchair, half-resigned.
“I knew he would be exiled. But for it to happen so quickly…”
“It seems like the Emperor was waiting for you to leave, Your Majesty.”
I couldn’t believe Sovieshu banished my brother. I closed my eyes to calm my uneasy heart, and Countess Eliza spoke to me in a careful voice.
“Will you send money and letters to Lord Koshar?”
“I should.”
I stood up from my armchair and went to my desk. When I went to open the drawer, however, I paused. There was a delicate layer of makeup powder between the gap of the drawer door. I swept my fingers through it, collecting the powder on my fingers.
“…”
It was a silvery color, but so subtle that it was hardly noticeable unless one knew to look for it. I had left it in the drawer before leaving Wirwol, just in case someone tried to open it.
“Your Majesty? Is there something wrong?”
As I stopped and looked at my fingers, Countess Eliza approached me. I quickly brushed the powder from my hands.
“Has anyone come by my room while I was away?”
“The ladies-in-waiting took a vacation and went home.”
I went out into the hall and asked the same question to the guards.
“Only the maids who come here to clean, Your Majesty.”
‘I don’t think it’s the people who always come and go in my room…’
“What is it, Your Majesty?”
“There’s a trace of someone searching my room.”
The ladies-in-waiting who attended to me and the guards outside the door looked at each other in amazement. One of the guards then recalled something.
“Come to think of it, Your Majesty. A few days ago, a collective summons was issued, and we were absent for a while.”
“Collective summons?”
“Yes. Each palace guard was called in order.”
Did the intruder visit my room in the meantime?
“Who issued the summons?”
“The knight commander.”
‘Sovieshu…!’
An unpleasant idea occurred to me. I quickly went back into my room and looked at the place where I kept Heinley’s letters hidden. If the knight commander were involved in this, he might have taken them. Sovieshu would use any tool at his disposal to divorce me.