"Well, let it go," said the old lady recklessly. "I shan"t stop it."
"No, but I can"t help thinking Gilbert and Wall ought to be in the secret."
"Do you imagine they"d stop printing?"
"I don"t imagine anything. I believe, to speak temperately, they"d drop dead. I only say it"s a fearful and wonderful situation, and they ought to know it. You see, dear woman, you"ve not only played a joke on the public; you"ve played a joke on them."
"Well, for goodness" sake, why not? What"s a publisher, anyway? Has he got to be treated like a Hindu G.o.d? Billy Stark, I wish you"d stayed in London where you belong."
Again Billy felt himself wheezing, and gave up to it as before. She watched him unwinkingly, and by and by she chuckled a little and then joined him, in an ecstasy.
"Florrie," said he, "you"re simply a glorious portent, and you"ve no more moral sense than the cat."
"No, Billy, no!" She was answering in a happy acquiescence. "I never had any. I"ve always wanted some fun, and I want it to this day." Her old face changed surprisingly under a shade of gravity. "And see where it"s led me." It was natural to conclude that her verdict embraced wider evidence than that of the erring book. Billy, quite serious in his turn, looked at her in candid invitation. She answered him earnestly and humbly: "Billy, I always took the wrong road. I took it in the beginning and I never got out of it."
"There"s a frightful number of wrong turnings," Billy offered, in rather inadequate sympathy, "and a great deficiency of guideposts."
"You see, Billy, the first thing I did was to give up Charlie Grant and marry Mark Fulton. I was only a country girl. Charlie was a country boy.
I thought Mark must be a remarkable person because he was a professor in Cambridge. I thought Charlie was going to be a poor little country doctor, because he was studying medicine with another country doctor, and he couldn"t go to college to save his skin. There were eight children, you know, younger than he. He had to work on the farm. Well, Billy, I made a mistake."
Stark marveled at the crude simplicity of all this. He forgot, for the moment, that she was an old woman, and that for a long time she had been conning over the past like a secret record, full of blemishes, perhaps, but not now to be remedied.
"You did like Charlie," he ventured. "I knew that."
"I liked him very much. And I"ve never quite escaped from his line of life, if that"s what they call it. Since Electra was alone and I came here to stay with her, I"ve been thrown with his widow. Bessie"s an old woman, too, you know, like me. But she"s a different kind."
"She was a pretty girl. Rather sedate, I remember, for a girl."
"Billy, she"s a miracle. She lives alone, all but old Mary to do the work. She"s stiffened from rheumatism so that she sits in her chair nearly all day, and stumps round a little, in agony, with two canes. But she"s had her life."
"How has she had it, Florrie? In having Grant?"
"Because all her choices were good choices. She took him when he was poor, and she helped him work. They had one son. He married a singer, a woman--well, like me. Maybe it was in the blood to want a woman like me.
Then this boy and the singer had two sons--one of them clever. Peter Grant, you know. I suppose he"s a genius, if there are such. The other has--a deformity."
"I know," he nodded. "You wrote me."
"I didn"t write you all. He wasn"t born with it. He was a splendid boy, but when he had the accident the mother turned against him. She couldn"t help it. I see how it was, Billy. The pride of life, that"s what it is--the pride of life."
"Is he dwarfed?"
"Heavens! he was meant for a giant, rather. He has great strength.
Somehow he impresses you. But it"s the grandmother that built him up, body and brain. Now he"s a man grown, and she"s made him. Don"t you see, Billy? she"s struck home every time."
"Is she religious?"
"Yes, she is. She prays." Her voice fell, with the word. She looked at him searchingly, as if he might understand better than she did the potency of that communion.
"She"s a Churchwoman, I suppose."
"No, no. She only believes things--and prays. She told me one day Osmond--he"s the deformed one--he couldn"t have lived if she hadn"t prayed."
"That he would be better?"
"No, she was quite explicit about that. Only that they would be taught how to deal with it--his trouble. To do it, she said, as G.o.d wished they should. Billy, it"s marvelous."
"Well, dear child," said Billy, "you can pray, too."
Her old face grew pinched in its denial.
"No," she answered sadly, "no. It wouldn"t rise above the ceiling. What I mean is, Billy, that all our lives we"re opening gates into different roads. Bessie Grant opened the right gate. She"s got into a level field and she"s at home there. But I shouldn"t be. I only go and climb up and look over the bars. And I go stumbling along, hit or miss, and I never get anywhere."
He was perplexed. He frowned a little.
"Where do you want to get, Florrie?" he asked at length.
She smiled into his face engagingly.
"I don"t know, Billy. Only where things don"t bore me; where they are worth while."
"But they always get to bore us--" he paused and she took him up.
"You mean I"m bored because I am an old woman. I should say so, too, but then I look at that other woman and I know it isn"t so. No, Billy, I took the wrong road."
Billy looked at her a long time searchingly.
"Well," he said at last, "what can we do about it? I mean, besides writing fake memoirs and then going ag"in our best friends when they beg us to own up?"
She put the question by, as if it could not possibly be considered, and yet as if it made another merry chapter to her jest. Billy had gathered his consolatory forces for another leap.
"Florrie," said he, "come back to London with me."
"My dear child!"
"You marry me, Florrie. I asked you fifty odd years ago. I could give you a good sober sort of establishment, a salon of a sort. I know everybody in arts and letters. Come on, Florrie."
Fire was in the old lady"s eye. She rose and made him a pretty courtesy.
"Billy," said she, "you"re splendid. I won"t hold you to it, but it will please me to my dying day to think I"ve had another offer. No, Billy, no. You wouldn"t like it. But you"re splendid."
Billy, too, had risen. They took hands and stood like boy and girl looking into each other"s eyes. There was a little suffusion, a tear perhaps, the memory of other times when coin did not have to be counted so carefully, when they could open the windows without inevitable dread of the night, its dark and chill. The old lady broke the moment.
"Come over and see Bessie Grant. What do you say?"
"Delighted. Get your hat."
But she appeared with a gay parasol, one of Electra"s, appropriated from the stand with the guilty consideration that the owner would hardly be back before three o"clock. The old lady liked warm colors. She loved the bright earth in all its phases, and of these a parasol was one. They went down the broad walk and out into the road shaded by summer green, that quivering roof-work of drooping branches and many leaves.
"Billy," said she, "I"m glad you"ve come."