"Neither do I." She threw up her hands. "Who suggests a Christmas vacation in Paris? Who can just set aside two weeks and go play tourist? Maybe you can, but I sure as h.e.l.l can"t. I have responsibilities-"
"Here we go. You act like you"re the only one in the world with a job, Ree. Like the entire state of Wyoming will fall into ruin if you"re not around to do your part."
"That"s not fair."
"You"re d.a.m.n right it"s not. You work like a dog. Everybody takes time off once in a while. You never do. So excuse the h.e.l.l out of me for wanting to give you something you"ve never had."
"That"s it, isn"t it? You want to show me all I"ve been missing by taking me to a place I"d never be able to afford to go to on my own. Well guess what? I don"t care about any of that. I never have and I never will." She clenched her hands into fists. "Don"t try and change me, Gavin. I am who I am."
"This has nothing to do with me trying to change you, or seeing it as an opportunity to rub it in your face that I have a bigger bank account than you."
"Yeah? Then how come you got so p.i.s.sed off when you thought Vi was trying to buy Sierra"s affection? How is offering to take me on an all-expenses-paid trip to France any f.u.c.king different?"
"It"s a h.e.l.luva lot different, but you"re too busy..." G.o.ddammit. Take your own advice. Stop and think before you say something you can"t take back. Take your own advice. Stop and think before you say something you can"t take back. "It"d be nice if you"d take that d.a.m.n chip off your shoulder once in a while." "It"d be nice if you"d take that d.a.m.n chip off your shoulder once in a while."
"I will. Just as soon as you take that silver spoon out of your mouth."
f.u.c.k.
They were both angry. Breathing hard. Neither willing to back down.
The timer on her watch started to beep. She spun on her heel and left the room without a word.
He shouted, "Nice talking to you."
That was mature.
He paced. Then he slumped against the wall. Was he really such a bad guy for wanting to spend some alone time with the woman he loved? Not that he"d told her that.
Would he ask her to drop everything and go to Paris with him if he wasn"t going for Sierra?
No.
Good thing that hadn"t come up, because it did put his offer in a different light.
Trying to get any work done in this frame of mind would be pointless. He changed clothes and ran five miles on the treadmill. Then he beat the c.r.a.p out of his heavy bag until he could hardly hold his arms up.
After a long shower, he felt calmer. In a better frame of mind to tackle the problem, because it wasn"t going away, no matter how much he wished it would.
Paris.
What the h.e.l.l was wrong with him?
Didn"t Gavin know her at all?
When had she ever let anyone pay for anything she hadn"t earned?
Never.
Being intimately involved with him shouldn"t earn her a trip to France, for Christsake.
Rielle placed the loaf pans on the cooling racks and loaded the next batch of bread into the oven. She glanced at the time. Noon. Where had this day gone? She set her watch and tackled the stack of dirty dishes.
Paris.
Besides, she didn"t have a pa.s.sport. She angrily scrubbed the dishes. It was mortifying to admit that she"d never been on an airplane. She"d never been anywhere. She and Rory had taken a camping trip to Yellowstone once. She"d been to Denver a number of times. She"d driven into the Rockies. She"d visited the farm and range land in Nebraska. Same with the Black Hills and the prairie in western South Dakota.
So she couldn"t see herself buying luggage and boarding a plane that"d fly over the ocean when she"d never actually seen the ocean.
That is not Gavin"s fault.
Maybe she did have a chip on her shoulder.
Or worse, maybe she had the fear if Gavin took her someplace sophisticated, she"d embarra.s.s him with her wide-eyed wonder. Maybe he"d realize that if she couldn"t live in his world even temporarily, then he couldn"t live in hers either.
d.a.m.ned if she did; d.a.m.ned if she didn"t.
Once the dishes were done, she updated her short to-do list. This was the slow time of year for her.
Gavin knew that. Was that why he"d suggested taking a trip now? Because he understood how hard she"d be working again in another few months?
Possibly. But she didn"t believe it was a coincidence that Sierra"s mother was living in Paris and all of a sudden he planned a trip there. Was he trying to prove something to his ex-wife by inviting Rielle along? Especially since Sierra had mentioned her mother"s boyfriend?
Another three hours pa.s.sed. She was thinking it odd she hadn"t seen Sierra or Gavin in the kitchen looking for food, when Sierra walked in.
Rielle smiled. "I wondered if you were so engrossed in your homework you forgot to eat."
Sierra shook her head. "I"m not hungry."
That didn"t sound good. "You feel sick?"
She looked away, but not before Rielle noticed she"d been crying.
"Hey, sweetheart, what"s wrong?"
Then Sierra threw her arms around Rielle and sobbed.
Caught off guard, because this was unlike Sierra, she rubbed circles on the girl"s back, trying to soothe her.
It must"ve worked because Sierra sighed. "Thanks for the hug, Ree. I"m just having a s.h.i.tty day."
Welcome to the club. "You"d probably feel better if you ate. I made a loaf of pumpkin bread. Would you like some?"
"Sure."
Sierra watched from the breakfast bar as Rielle sliced two pieces and poured a cup of milk.
A small smile played on Sierra"s lips.
"What?"
"It"s like you"re feeding me milk and cookies."
"Have you ever seen me bake cookies?"
Sierra"s brow furrowed. "No. I guess I haven"t."
"That"s because I suck at cookies. I burn them. Or I undercook them. Or they"re too big. Or too small. Or they"re too squishy. Or too hard. So I"ll stick to baking breads, rolls and m.u.f.fins."
Sierra pinched off a corner of the bread and popped it in her mouth. "My dad used to eat a big blueberry m.u.f.fin and a banana every day for breakfast. It drove me crazy because he never ate anything else. If he couldn"t have that then he wouldn"t eat."
"I remember. But I"ve yet to see him eat a single m.u.f.fin since he"s lived here."
"Not on his diet anymore. Now he eats cereal or yogurt. Or something else disgustingly healthy."
Rielle laughed.
Sierra broke off a couple more bites. Then she said, "I heard you guys fighting earlier."
She blew across her cup of tea. "Does your dad know you overheard?"
"No. He"s been locked in his office." Sierra looked up. "My mom wants me to come to Paris for Christmas. He won"t let me fly alone. So that means he"d be stuck in Paris for two weeks."
She made a noncommittal noise.
"My mom...she can be such a b.i.t.c.h to him. She basically said he"d be better off not going to Paris since he doesn"t know the meaning of romance and wouldn"t know what to do with himself."
Was that why Gavin had asked her? To prove his ex-wife wrong?
"I know he asked you to come with him. I know you said no. I don"t understand why you"d say no. I mean, you"re already with him and it wouldn"t be like you"d be doing anything different there than you"re doing here."
Insightful little thing.
"I think you have the wrong impression of him. I mean, since he"s got money you"d think he"d be going cool places all the time. But he"s always working and he"s never taken a two-week vacation."
"Never?"
"He"s never taken a vacation with anyone besides me either. So it"d be a big deal if he did go, especially if he went with you. And just so you know, if you don"t go, he"ll be there by himself. I"m not saying that to make you feel guilty, I"m telling you because I think he deserves to have fun. He should get to be in Paris with someone he cares about. So I"m just asking you to think about it."
"Sierra?" Gavin"s voice echoed in the kitchen. He held his phone to his ear. "Your mom is on the line. Come up to my office so we can talk about a few things and get this finalized."
That"s when Rielle knew it was too late. Her pride was keeping her from experiencing something amazing. Her pride was also making her question the motives of a man who meant more to her than she"d ever imagined and who needed her support, not her suspicion.
Rielle, you are a stubborn, arrogant fool for treating Gavin like you did. Buck up and apologize.
She heated another cup of tea and peeled a tangerine, arranging the crescents around a slice of pumpkin bread. She headed upstairs and waited in the family room as she sussed out what she intended to say.
Ten minutes later Gavin"s office door opened. Footsteps faded down the hallway to Sierra"s room and her door closed. She hadn"t slammed it. That was a good sign.
Rielle took a deep breath and knocked. She expected to hear, "Come in," but Gavin answered the door.
He peered down the hallway almost as if he was disappointed to see her. "Ree? Hey. What"s up?"
"I thought you might be hungry so I brought you a snack. And tea."
"Oh. Well. Sure. I could eat." He grabbed the tray from her, and slid it on his desk, but didn"t invite her in.
She followed him anyway and shut the door behind her. Her heart hammed like crazy when he turned around, surprised to see her there. No excuses. Just say it straight out. No excuses. Just say it straight out. She marched up to him. "I"m sorry for the way I acted earlier. It was wrong, I was wrong and I hope you"ll forgive me." She marched up to him. "I"m sorry for the way I acted earlier. It was wrong, I was wrong and I hope you"ll forgive me."
Gavin rested his backside on the edge of his desk and crossed his arms over his chest in a go on go on posture. posture.
"I don"t want to explain because I"m afraid it"ll come off sounding like an excuse. There isn"t any excuse for the defensive way I acted and the accusations I made. I was shocked by the invite. Of course because it"s me, I wasn"t immediately thinking of all the fun and romantic things we could do together. I immediately thought, I don"t have a pa.s.sport. I"ve never been on a plane. You would be so cool and sophisticated and I"d stick out like a country b.u.mpkin. During the panicked stage, I only thought of myself and how I"d feel. I shoved aside the thoughtfulness and sweetness of even being asked to spend two weeks with you in Paris."
He stared at her. "And?"
"And what?"
"And what about your comments about the differences in our financial situations?"
Rielle twisted her fingers together.
"What about that pride of yours that can fill an entire room?" Gavin stood up and stalked her. "What about the fact we"re lovers, we"ve been lovers for several weeks and you still won"t let me do things for you."
"I, umm, let you buy pizza the other night."
"Any other time, that would make me laugh. But the fact I have to explain to you just how ridiculous that statement is, is a big part of the problem."
"I"m used to splitting costs-"
"With your daughter. With your friends. Not with a lover. And as your lover, I"ve earned the right to do some things for you. Things that will make me me happy." happy."
Her back hit the door. How had that happened? "Like what?"
Gavin braced his hands beside her shoulders. "I want to take you out for dinner tomorrow night and you"ll let me pay. For everything."
She started to shake her head but stopped when he made that growling noise. "Um. Okay."
"I want you to turn over the log splitting and wood hauling duties to me."
"Gavin. I can"t do that."
"Why not?" He waited and then answered, "Because you"ve always done it by yourself, right? Well, guess what? No more. It will now fall under the realm of my household responsibilities. And the first time you ask me if I"ve filled the wood box? I will put you over my knee and paddle your a.s.s."
Holy s.h.i.t.