Volume 1
Chapter 2-1
Chapter 2 – Even if your Character is Plain, that’s still an Acceptable Personality
Part 1
“…………”
“Wha-, what is it?”
“Nothing…. Katou, was it?”
“Ye-yes.”
“You’re cute in an ordinary sort of way.”
The sun was dipping below the horizon in the west as we continued our talk in one of the cafes located along the road home.
In this cafe amongst all the customers, I had accomplished my dramatic reunion with that fated girl…, or so I would have liked to pretend. The truth is, it was already around half a month or so that I’d been cla.s.smates with Katou Megumi. Despite that, I was still very nervous with my words.
“Th-thanks. But, when you say it so suddenly, it feels very insincere.”
“Ah yeah, I think so too. Please forget what I just said.”
“Ah, is it alright if I make another order? I’ve become a bit hungry all of a sudden.”
“Ah, please order whatever you like. Today everything is on me.”
“Ah, sorry for making you treat me, um….”
While taking sips from my coffee, I made quick glances between the menu and the expression on Katou’s face. I reaffirmed to myself that the words I had blurted out earlier were no lies.
Katou Megumi was certainly cute.
Her facial features were well-proportioned. She was neither too tall nor too short. Her skin was finely balanced in softness. She was curvy in all the right places, yet slim in the places that mattered.
“Um…what’s this Red Bean Toast?”
“Not sure, it looks sweet?”
“Ah, excuse me, an unbaked cheesecake please.”
“Oh, ok.”
However, why is the situation like this? I mean nowadays in certain situations, saying “You’re cute” straight to a girl’s face could be taken as a confession. But to have absolutely no reactions or any feelings stirring in your heart, this is….
What exactly is the meaning of this? What’s with this lack of awareness, Katou? It’s almost disturbing!
“Ah, it is a bit surprising though. You’re more of a ‘Riajuu’ than what I imagined.” (1)
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I mean having you suddenly say to me: ‘There’s something I want to talk to you about right now so do you want to grab a drink together’ is….”
“Aah, that’s….”
Right after inviting Katou, I had apologised to Kano-chan over the phone saying, “Sorry I need to go somewhere today!” From an outsider’s point of view I might have looked like a horrible, cheating boyfriend making up some excuse to his girlfriend while standing next to the girl he was fooling around with.
“I’ve been misunderstanding a bit. Aki-kun, I thought you were surely….”
“Ah, it’s like that, after all, this is the first time in my life that I’ve ever invited anyone.”
I was interested in hearing the words after “Surely…”, but I had a bad feeling that whatever was coming afterwards would’ve been something unpleasant enough to derail the conversation, so I had to quickly nip whatever was coming in the bud.
“Is that true? That I’m the first person you’ve ever invited?”
“On the G.o.d of Divine Drawings, the G.o.d of Heavenly Screenplays and the G.o.d of Celestial Background Songs, I swear to those three G.o.ds you are the first!”
“I’m not sure what kind of G.o.ds those are, but for your first invitation, it was quite an impulsive one wasn’t it?”
“That’s….”
Wait, wasn’t I also meant to be super nervous on this occasion?
I mean to put it this way, during that moment when I was reunited with that “Girl on Top of the Hill,” I would have thought that my mind would just go completely blank, and that my heart would start beating faster and faster, and that my mouth would go all dry and I would just be completely speechless in front of her, right?
And then afterwards, after we’d become closer, we’d then have various misunderstandings between us. We’d pa.s.s by each other without speaking. Our feelings for each other would turn to disgust. And every time after that we’d fight whenever we saw each other until all that would be left was just a horrible relationship between us.
And finally, there would be one particular incident that occurred, which would bring us both together to solve the misunderstandings between us, and that would be the spark that would lead us to affirm the feelings we had when we first met, leading us to our lovey-dovey happy ending.
Unleashing all my delusions into that sort of story surely wasn’t a fool’s deed now, was it?
“Aside from that, I’m sorry for not noticing you at all up until now.”
“It’s something that can happen, it’s just a bit of a shock that’s all.”
“It’s just…um, you know, sometimes you don’t recognise people when they’re in their regular clothes when compared to their school uniform. That’s why I get a completely different image of people.”
“Is that so?”
“Ah yes!”
I actually had no recollection of her in her regular clothes, so it was not really the case that I had some sort of image overlap with her being in different clothes…. Of course this is something I would never have said to her straight up.
Although I remember there being various white clothes on that day, having come face-to-face with the person herself and remembering neither her face, what she said, nor various other details of her appearance in that encounter…. I’m quite the discourteous fellow.
“B-, by the way, why didn’t you tell me your name then? I mean we’re in the same year and all.”
“Um, since we’d already been acquainted for quite some time, giving a self-introduction then would’ve been strange wouldn’t it?”
“But weren’t we in different cla.s.ses during our first year?”
“I was in E Cla.s.s, so our cla.s.ses would have been on the same floor, right?”
I was in A Cla.s.s, so I would have been pa.s.sing by E cla.s.s every day on the way to my own cla.s.sroom.
Oh c.r.a.p, we must’ve gone by each other so many times! It would have been almost a daily event, wouldn’t it?
“B-by the way, what happened to that hat of yours? It sure was great that it didn’t end up being run over by a car!”
“Ah, I gave it to one of my younger relatives.”
“Eh….”
“During the spring break my little cousin came over to play. She saw the hat and became quite interested in it so I decided to give it to her as a parting gift. She was really happy about it.”
“A, aah, I see…that’s good, that’s really good.”
The foundation of our story, the significant event item of our encounter, seems to be now in the happy hands of another person….
For the sake of masking my own disappointment, I had, in desperation, turned to asking a question, however Katou’s response had drawn all my guilt away.
What is this exactly? Are you being serious with this lack of awareness Katou? It’s surprisingly disappointing, this lack of awareness.
“Well, Katou, you seem to have a better memory than me when it comes to people.”
By posing more questions regarding various things, the last of my guilt and the beating doubts in my heart were cleansed while my manner towards Katou grew more unreserved.
“Eh, really?”
“I mean until our 2nd year, we’ve never even spoken to each other once right?”
“Well, I suppose that’s true.”
“What’s more I’m in the going home after school club, I’ve never been outstanding with my grades, and on top of that I’m an Otaku…. Yet you remember me even though I’m just some unremarkable guy from another cla.s.s.” (2)
Speaking of which, my reputation around the school is actually quite good although, how should I put it?—In a word, the girls in my cla.s.s will get to know me a little too well, and then they will lose all awareness of me as a member of the opposite s.e.x. Eventually they just end up back to treating me just like how a Girl #2 did. (3)
“I would recognise you as an Otaku, although to say you don’t stand out, I think everyone would disagree with that.”
“That’s….”
“I mean, you’re one of the Top 5 celebrities in the school.”
“Geh…do I really stand out that much?”
“During our first year school festival, the anime screening meet was quite large right? There was a certain someone who had engaged in Guerrilla tactics to try to get what he wanted but only ended up looking like a problem child who couldn’t have his way. He had specifically gone to the staff room every day to get formal permission, and in the end he even tangled with the deputy headmaster until the headmaster had to step into the situation…. What’s more, that person wasn’t even part of any of the big sports clubs was he?”
“…Well those guys from the sports clubs wouldn’t even think of doing anything as large as hosting an anime screening meet in the first place right?”
That day was really…a bit of a bungle.
Do I really stand out that much?
“Because of all that, whenever someone mentions the name Aki Tomoya, most people will either burst out laughing or twitch their face in disgust. I don’t think there’s anyone who hasn’t heard of this story by now.”
“E-enemies to allies, what’s the approximate ratio?”
“I’m not sure…. Maybe around six-to-four?”
“Woah…as I would expect. That’s a lot of enemies.”
“Well it’s not something you can really do much about when you attract a lot of attention like that.”
Whether I’m the chosen Elite Otaku or an extravagant show-off, whether I be an enemy or an ally of the people, I’m the Mysterious Aki Tomoya. Although I get the feeling that there are certain types of people out there who will hate any aspects of me regardless.
‘It’s alright to get out there. Even the strong stakes get driven into the ground.’
Those were the words that I’d been subconsciously keeping in my heart since I was little. Grandpa, I’ve always been more of a kid in your eyes than I thought.
“I see…well, I don’t really have the perception to be able to see things in that kind of manner.”
“Ah yes, it’s basically like that.”
“Eh, what is?”
“Not being able to perceive things that way. You and I both, Aki-kun.”
“You too, Katou?”
“Well Aki-kun, you don’t actively make an attempt to attract attention for yourself but for me, I don’t actively try to be invisible.”
“Ah….”
Since I had been thinking of no one but myself, I had failed to notice the delicate change in expression of the girl in front of me.
“And yet, I know all about you, but you didn’t know about me.”
A bit of loneliness, a bit of sadness, and a look of abandonment pa.s.sed through that delicate expression of hers.
“My friends have said I leave somewhat of a light impression on people apparently. They say it’s as though I smoothly flow right through the minds of others….”
“Ah, I get it! I totally get it!”
“…Totally?”
“I’m quite surprised! I would have thought you’d be more popular since you’re quite the cute one Katou!”
“…You say that even though you hadn’t remembered my name nor my face until today?”
“Today was when I started thinking that way!”
Although my words might appear to have been bold attempts to salvage the awkward conversation, they were not just simple one-off lies to brush off the situation with compliments. No matter what angle I looked at her from, the girl in front of me called Katou Megumi was, without a doubt, cute.
It’s just that I usually do not talk to girls so my personality of holding nothing back when speaking ends up being….
“It’s fine for me to be ignored.”
“No it’s not, that’s because….”
“I am a plain person after all.”
“Plain…?”
The moment Katou spoke those self-demoralising words, I felt something hot stirring in my heart.
“I’m not like you Aki-kun, my grades are also only average, I also haven’t joined any clubs and I haven’t taken on any cla.s.s rep-like responsibilities.”
That ‘something’ seemed like discomfort, or helplessness, or possibly even anger.
“I also don’t have that many friends, and that I haven’t had the courage to try to make more friends.”
Every single word that Katou spoke seemed to fuel my emotions higher as opposed to stemming them.
“That’s why it’s not just you who can’t remember me, it’s everyone else as well and there’s not much I can do about it….”
“That’s not true!”
“Eh?”
In that moment, I slammed my fist down onto the table while shouting out at the same time,
“Katou…..You’re not plain at all!”
I stood up, raising my fist above my head in a grandiose manner.
My sudden outburst of emotion surprised the other customers around us, causing their attention to turn to our table.
“I swear that you are not plain! That’s why Katou, that’s why….”
“Pl-please, calm down a bit Aki-kun.”
It wasn’t only the customers around us that were surprised. Katou too seemed surprised. However, the torrent of burning emotion inside me could no longer be stopped.
“Sorry, I got a little too excited.”
The build-up to that impa.s.sioned moment of raised fists and grand declarations had been almost unbearable, I had to take a deep breath before slowly sitting back down onto the sofa….
“It was only last year….”
And so, this time around we started a calmer conversation.
“When you say last year, do you mean our first year?”
“No, it was our second year.”
“Huh?”
“In my cla.s.s, there was this amazingly plain girl.”
“Who is it? Is it a girl I also know?”
“I’m not sure, as even the girls in cla.s.s ignored her most of the time.”
“Ah…I see.”
“This girl wore her hair in braids, she also wore gla.s.ses and had freckles; she was the perfect template for the plain girl.”
“Ah, was there such a girl in A Cla.s.s?”
“No, she was in Cla.s.s-3.”
“Huh?”
“What’s more is that she had a strong inferiority complex about her own face, her personality, and her other attributes; it ended up leaving a horrible ‘Why me?’ kind of loser’s aura around her.”
“Ah, there certainly might be at least one person in our year who is like that.”
As I recited the words to my story in a quiet manner, Katou listened in closely, acknowledging my story in a similarly quiet manner.
“However….”
“Mhmm.”
From that expression of hers, I could see she seemed to have lost the thread of what I was trying to say, and her interest in the topic at hand was a little mixed.
“This is where it gets moe….”
“Hm, hmm?”
“That is, those tightly tied braids of hers, those unfashionable black-rimmed gla.s.ses, those attempts to always hide her freckles by bowing down her head in shame.”
“Hm, hm, hmm?”
“That isolationist att.i.tude of hers! Her insistence on never talking to anyone she saw!”
“A, Aki-kun….?”
“This girl would…, only to me…. Ah, this is important! She would only open up to me, and, what’s more, after opening up to me she would soon…. Ah, this is super important! She would only look at me and and… This is the best, wouldn’t you agree?! Katou, you think so too right?! Right?!”
“Ah, ummm…even if you say ‘Right?!!’ that’s….”
“Ah…sorry.”
Before I knew it, the expression on Katou’s face was stuck on a look of permanent confusion. I again became aware of the attention I was attracting and sat down again on the sofa.
“She was at the very least, to me, the best girl there was. That’s why I could not take my eyes off her….”
“Did you like that girl?”
“Hmm, if things had kept developing as they had, she would have been my wife….”
“Th-that’s a quick decision. Even though both of you are still in high school.”
“That…would have happened afterwards.”
This was however, an untimely moment for me to calm down, because the story after these happy memories was, to me, full of nothing but bitterness.
“Ah, could it be that…things didn’t go well?”
“The problem lies with what she became—I guess in an effort to go out with me….”
I was hesitant at this point to go further. However, not telling Katou the further details of this story would be an act of dishonesty. As I steeled myself for what was to come, I began to speak, albeit in a forced and heavy manner.
“That girl has always loved me. However, I did not love her the way she was.”
“That’s….”
“One day, she crossed the border and changed completely…. She untied her hair and let it hang down in a wavy style. She stopped wearing gla.s.ses and started to wear contacts instead. She even started using some light makeup to cover up her freckles.”
“Ah, the image change.”
“She became an instant celebrity in the cla.s.s. The boys in the cla.s.s were all desperately trying to call out to her and woo her…, and to think that those guys were completely ignoring her just a few days ago. It’s unthinkable, right?”
“Ah I see, you must’ve been worried, being her boyfriend and all.”
“So in the end I said to her, “If you’re going to become popular, then I, as your boyfriend, should also be able to boast to everyone about it.” I understand that it was because of her impressions of what I said, that we ended up reaffirming our feelings for each other again.”
“Whaat? I thought it was going to be a serious story at first, but it’s just a simple love story.”
“That’s not true!”
“Um, um.”
The tone of Katou’s words seemed to mock the seriousness of my story, sparking my fierce objection of her words. I was grateful for Katou’s concern; however I could not at the time acknowledge any of her light-hearted talk on the matter. Because the truth of how that girl and I would no longer see each other eye to eye was about to come….
“From the time when she became popular and I started worrying, the situation eventually reached a point where I also began to feel completely uncomfortable.”
“Are you sure it wasn’t just the fact you were worried?”
“That was what I first thought as well…. However, that discomfort, even after we made up, did not go away.”
“Ah, why was that so? I mean she….”
“I had not been hoping for that at all.”
“But Aki-kun, she just misunderstood your expectations didn’t she? Although if that’s the case, I would have to think you would both be at each other’s throats quite often….”
“No, even if we consider that, there were too many unnatural points.”
“Unnatural…, do you mean her lying to you ?”
If it had been simply lies it would have been alright. Although I might have been hurt by her lies, it would have at least eased my discomfort. However….
“The development was too sudden.”
“Development?”
“Everything was great before we went out. The way that her heart swayed was firmly depicted through many events. It was possible to empathise with her on a heart-to-heart level.”
“Events? Depict? Empathise?”
“It all starts after the Second Part, the point after confessing and going out with her. Our dates suddenly became frantic, we would jump from date to date, the depictions of what she was thinking were for the most part omitted. Then, like a traffic light, she would quickly change her mind every few minutes and all of sudden I could no longer keep up with her.”
“…Second Part?”
“I’d spoken to the other heroines briefly and they’d have monologues like ‘If I become like her, he might not leave’ in their lines. Generally speaking, is this normal?”
“…………”
“Kah. Ahaha oh I get it, I get it now! It’s these garbage developments that make you want to smash the monitor.”
That writer had no ability to finish a story. What’s more, it was clear from the middle part of the story that he had started to cut corners. Whether the writer had lost interest, or ran out of time, or simply did not realise he didn’t have the ability to do the job, it seemed to be of no concern to him if the readers would see such flaws. Honestly, for all that, trashy writers are better off dying.
Because that is the truth; precisely because that is the truth, there are some things I can never forgive.
A light truth is more sinful than a heavy lie.
“Uh, um, Aki-kun….I was just wondering.”
“What?”
“Aki-kun, could it be that this girlfriend….your potential wife, is an anime girl?”
“No way, of course not.”
“Ah, I, I’m sorry. I was just thinking of stupid things….”
“It’s not from anime, it’s from a dating sim. She’s a girl from ‘A Kiss to Spin One’s Wheels’, which went on sale last year.”
“…Eh?”
“However Katou, take heart, since your misunderstanding is about to no longer remain a misunderstanding. Of all the eroge last year that were ported over as dating sims, this game somehow managed to reach one of the top 3 positions on the sales chart. Since the makers have had some of their previous works adapted into anime, her becoming an anime girl is only a matter of time……what’s wrong?”
The expression on Katou’s face had, before I knew it, become awfully flat.
“…So that’s why she’s in Cla.s.s 3 of the second year. Aah, it was so confusing, it’s only natural I wouldn’t know anything about this.”
“Given the quality of the work, I wouldn’t have thought it’d be natural…., although they did publicly announce that the t.i.tle had sold something like 30,000 copies.”
“Ha….”
“Are you tired?”
“A little.”
Even though I was the one who had been talking this entire time, for some reason or another, Katou was tired. Was it because she had been listening so intently to my story?
Katou is quite the nice person, as one would expect. Even if she doesn’t stand out.
“So Aki-kun, what is this game heroine?”
If only to remove some of the sting I felt in the tone of Katou’s words just then, I’ll pretend that that feeling there was likely just my imagination.
“So basically, what I’ve been wanting to say is….why you aren’t plain Katou.”
“Um, so how does this story connect with that?”
Since I was still trying to understand that look of annoyance on her face, I’ll pretend that feeling was also just my imagination.
“’Plain’ is by itself a strong personality! ‘Plain’ by itself makes for strong character!”
“Eh?”
“Braids, gla.s.ses, freckles…if you stack these kinds of plain and unavoidable attributes together, they form an irresistible charm that draws people in. A girl with that charm will be my number one kind of girl!”
Although according to the popularity poll on the game’s home page, her scenario held her back to fourth place.
“Katou, you say that you ‘don’t have that many’ friends, this girl didn’t have a single one. She didn’t have the courage to make a single one.”
To either grumble in the cafe to a friend about having few friends, or be determined enough to join a club to make friends—I wouldn’t be able to do either of those.
“Since you already have friends Katou, the position in which you stand is different in the first place.”
What’s more, to be in the kind of setting where you’re not able to speak to people, where you’d not come to school often, where you’d meet up with groups of girls to be bullied in a subdued manner……where you are s.e.xually hara.s.sed by groups of boys, that sort of setting simply makes one take heed of the dangers of the world.
“I will say it again Katou…. You’re not plain at all”
You’re neither plain nor flashy. However you lack personality and attributes. That, if I were to put it all in one phrase….
“However, Your character is dead!”
“….”
And while I’m at it, if I throw in two or three words more….
“Your character simply doesn’t hold up at all! It’s as though it’s half-baked or unfinished!”
“….”
And now for the finishing blow.
“And that’s why you don’t stand out at all!”
“….”
Upon taking in my fiery gaze and emotionally charged words, Katou stared back at me, her mouth agape. If I were to comment on that stare of hers right now, I could say that compared to earlier, the degree of flatness of her affect had increased. It would also be possible to say that my excessively brutal ravaging of her personality was why there was nothing now but an impression-less expression on her face.
“Umm, is it alright if I ask you something?”
“What?”
“So to put it, that excessively long presentation was just to encourage me wasn’t it?”
“Encourage? What for?”
“So rather than this being encouragement, it’s been a denial of me instead. You speak of me as though I’m beneath a game character.”
“What are you saying?! Throughout all of last year, there weren’t any characters that were more moe than that girl. Much less real girls, but even 2-D girls as well.”
“Shouldn’t the order for ‘Real Girls’ and ‘2-D Girls’ be reversed?”
“Eh? What for?”
“….”
“…Katou?”
“…………”
In the log house-styled cafe, where the rays of the evening sun crept in.
Until the cream on top of the Danish on our table had completely melted, Katou, unchanged in her silence, did not move.
Translation Notes and References
1. Rialju, a term used to refer to someone who finds fulfilment in ‘real life’ and has meaningful relationships with other people. Originates off 2ch, used somewhat mockingly, although use has become more regular amongst ‘normal’ people. Basically the j.a.panese version of the term ‘normalf.a.g or normie’ except more mild.
2. j.a.panese schools tend to have clubs for after school activities. If you’re not in any of those clubs you’re in the going home club.
3. Refers back to Chapter 1-3, Tomoya’s initial impression of Megumi Katou as nothing but a mere Girl #2.