More of what he said, I cannot tell; somehow this much has reached my ears. He remained there upon the straw while hour after hour pa.s.sed, pleading with the great Father for his son; his soul now lost in dull fatigue, now uttering itself in groans for lack of words, until at length the dawn looked in on the night-weary earth, and into the two sorrow-laden hearts, bringing with it a comfort they did not seek to understand.
CHAPTER XVI
But it brought no solace to the mind of the weak, hard-hearted, and guilty son. He had succeeded once more in temporarily soothing his conscience with some narcotic of false comfort, and now slept the sleep of the houseless, whose covering was narrower than he could wrap himself in. Ah, those nights! Alas for the sleepless human soul out in the eternal cold! But so heartless was James, that, if his mother had come to him in the morning with her tear-dimmed eyes, he would never have asked himself what could ail her; would never even have seen that she was unhappy; least of all would have suspected himself the cause of her red eyes and aching head, or that the best thing in him was that mental uneasiness of which he was constantly aware. Thank G.o.d, there was no way round the purifying fire! he could not escape it; he _must_ pa.s.s through it!
CHAPTER XVII
Little knows the world what a power among men is the man who simply and really believes in him who is Lord of the world to save men from their sins! He may be neither wise nor prudent; he may be narrow and dim-sighted even in the things he loves best; they may promise him much, and yield him but a poor fragment of the joy that might be and ought to be his; he may present them to others clothed in no attractive hues, or in any word of power; and yet, if he has but that love to his neighbour which is rooted in, and springs from love to his G.o.d, he is always a redeeming, reconciling influence among his fellows. The Robertsons were genial of heart, loving and tender toward man or woman in need of them; their door was always on the latch for such to enter. If the parson insisted on the wrath of G.o.d against sin, he did not fail to give a.s.surance of His tenderness toward such as had fallen. Together the G.o.dly pair at length persuaded Isobel of the eager forgiveness of the Son of Man. They a.s.sured her that he could not drive from him the very worst of sinners, but loved--nothing less than tenderly _loved_ any one who, having sinned, now turned her face to the Father. She would doubtless, they said, have to see her trespa.s.s in the eyes of unforgiving women, but the Lord would lift her high, and welcome her to the home of the glad-hearted.
But poor Isy, who regarded her fault as both against G.o.d and the man who had misled her, and was sick at the thought of being such as she judged herself, insisted that nothing G.o.d himself could do, could ever restore her, for nothing could ever make it that she had not fallen: such a contradiction, such an impossibility alone could make her clean! G.o.d might be ready to forgive her, but He could not love her! Jesus might have made satisfaction for her sin, but how could that make any difference in or to her? She was troubled that Jesus should have so suffered, but that could not give her back her purity, or the peace of mind she once possessed! That was gone for ever! The life before her took the appearance of an unchanging gloom, a desert region whence the gladness had withered, and whence came no purifying wind to blow from her the odours of the grave by which she seemed haunted! Never to all eternity could she be innocent again! Life had no interest for her! She was, and must remain just what she was; for, alas, she could not cease to be!
Such thoughts had at one period ravaged her life, but they had for some time been growing duller and deader: now once more revived by goodness and sympathy, they had resumed their gnawing and scorching, and she had grown yet more hateful to herself. Even the two who befriended and comforted her, could never, she thought, cease to regard her as what they knew she was! But, strange to say, with this revival of her suffering, came also a requickening of her long dormant imagination, favoured and cherished, doubtless, by the peace and love that surrounded her. First her dreams, then her broodings began to be haunted with sweet embodiments. As if the agonized question of the guilty Claudius were answered to her, to a.s.sure her that there _was_ "rain enough in the sweet heavens to wash her white as snow," she sometimes would wake from a dream where she stood in blessed nakedness with a deluge of cool, comforting rain pouring upon her from the sweetness of those heavens--and fall asleep again to dream of a soft strong west wind chasing from her the offensive emanations of the tomb, that seemed to have long persecuted her nostrils as did the blood of Duncan those of the wretched Lady Macbeth. And every night to her sinful bosom came back the soft innocent hands of the child she had lost--when ever and again her dream would change, and she would be Hagar, casting her child away, and fleeing from the sight of his death. More than once she dreamed that an angel came to her, and went out to look for her boy--only to return and lay him in her arms grievously mangled by some horrid beast.
When the first few days of her sojourn with the good Samaritans were over, and she had gathered strength enough to feel that she ought no longer to be burdensome to them, but look for work, they positively refused to let her leave them before her spirit also had regained some vital tone, and she was able to "live a little"; and to that end they endeavoured to revive in her the hope of finding her lost child: setting inquiry on foot in every direction, they promised to let her know the moment when her presence should begin to cause them inconvenience.
"Let you go, child?" her hostess had exclaimed: "G.o.d forbid! Go you shall not until you go for your own sake: you cannot go for ours!"
"But I"m such a burden to you--and so useless!"
"Was the Lord a burden to Mary and Lazarus, think ye, my poor bairn?"
rejoined Mrs. Robertson.
"Don"t, ma"am, please!" sobbed Isy.
"Inasmuch as ye did it to one of the least of these, ye did it to me!"
insisted her hostess.
"That doesna apply, ma"am," objected Isy. "I"m nane o" his!"
"Who is then? Who was it he came to save? Are you not one of his lost sheep? Are you not weary and heavy-laden? Will you never let him feel at home with you? Are _you_ to say who he is to love and who he isn"t? Are _you_ to tell him who are fit to be counted his, and who are not good enough?"
Isy was silent for a long time. The foundations of her coming peace were being dug deeper, and laid wider.
She still found it impossible, from the disordered state of her mind at the time, to give any notion of whereabout she had been when she laid her child down, and leaving him, could not again find him. And Maggie, who loved him pa.s.sionatately and believed him wilfully abandoned, cherished no desire to discover one who could claim him, but was unworthy to have him. For a long time, therefore, neither she nor her father ever talked, or encouraged talk about him; whence certain questing busybodies began to snuff and give tongue. It was all very well, they said, for the cobbler and his Maggie to pose as rescuers and benefactors: but whose was the child? His growth nevertheless went on all the same, and however such hints might seem to concern him, happily they never reached him. Maggie flattered herself, indeed, that never in this world would they reach him, but would die away in the void, or like a fallen wave against the heedless sh.o.r.e! And yet, all the time, in the not so distant city, a loving woman was weeping and pining for lack of him, whose conduct, in the eyes of the Robertsons, was not merely blameless, but sweetly and manifestly true, constantly yielding fuel to the love that encompa.s.sed her. But, although mentally and spiritually she was growing rapidly, she seemed to have lost all hope. For, deeper in her soul, and nearer the root of her misery than even the loss of her child, lay the character and conduct of the man to whom her love seemed inextinguishable. His apostasy from her, his neglect of her, and her constantly gnawing sense of pollution, burned at the bands of her life; and her friends soon began to fear that she was on the verge of a slow downward slide, upon which there is seldom any turning.
The parson and his wife had long been on friendliest terms with the farmer of Stonecross and his wife; and, brooding on the condition of their guest, it was natural that the thought of Mrs. Blatherwick should occur to them as one who might be able to render them the help they needed for her. Difficulties were in the way, it was true, chiefly that of conveying a true conception of the nature and character of the woman in whom they desired her interest; but if Mrs. Blatherwick were once to see her, there would be no fear of the result: received at the farm, she was certain in no way to compromise them! They were confident she would never belie the character they were prepared to give her. Neither was there any one at the farm for whom it was possible to dread intercourse with her, seeing that, since the death of their only daughter, they had not had a servant in the house. It was concluded therefore between them that Mr. Robertson should visit their friends at Stonecross, and tell them all they knew about Isy.
It was a lovely morning in the decline of summer, the corn nearly full grown, but still green, without sign of the coming gold of perfection, when the minister mounted the top of the coach, to wait, silent and a little anxious, for the appearance of the coachman from the office, thrusting the waybill into the pocket of his huge greatcoat, to gather his reins, and climb heavily to his perch. A journey of four hours, through a not very interesting country, but along a splendid road, would carry him to the village where the soutar lived, and where James Blatherwick was parson! There a walk of about three miles awaited him--a long and somewhat weary way to the town-minister--accustomed indeed to tramping the hard pavements, but not to long walks unbroken by calls.
Climbing at last the hill on which the farmhouse stood, he caught sight of Peter Blatherwick in a neighbouring field of barley stubble, with the reins of a pair of powerful Clydesdales in his hands, wrestling with the earth as it strove to wrench from his hold the stilts of the plough whose share and coulter he was guiding through it. Peter"s delight was in the open air, and hard work in it. He was as far from the vulgar idea that a man rose in the scale of honour when he ceased to labour with his hands, as he was from the fancy that a man rose in the kingdom of heaven when he was made a bishop.
As to his higher nature, the farmer believed in G.o.d--that is, he tried to do what G.o.d required of him, and thus was on the straight road to know him. He talked little about religion, and was no partisan. When he heard people advocating or opposing the claims of this or that party in the church, he would turn away with a smile such as men yield to the talk of children. He had no time, he would say, to spend on such disputes: he had enough to do in trying to practise what was beyond dispute.
He was a reading man, who not merely drank at every open source he came across, but thought over what he read, and was, therefore, a man of true intelligence, who was regarded by his neighbours with more than ordinary respect. He had been the first in the district to lay hold of the discoveries in chemistry applicable to agriculture, and had made use of them, with notable results, upon his own farm; setting thus an example which his neighbours were so ready to follow, that the region, nowise remarkable for its soil, soon became remarkable for its crops. The note-worthiest thing in him, however, was his _humanity_, shown first and chiefly in the width and strength of his family affections. He had a strong drawing, not only to his immediate relations, but to all of his blood; who were not few, for he came of an ancient family, long settled in the neighbourhood. In his worldly affairs he was well-to-do, having added not a little to the little his father had left him; but he was no lover of money, being open-handed even to his wife, upon whom first your money-grub is sure to exercise his parsimony. There was, however, at Stonecross, little call to spend and less temptation from without, the farm itself being equal to the supply of almost every ordinary necessity.
In disposition Peter Blatherwick was a good-humoured, even merry man, with a playful answer almost always ready for a greeting neighbour.
The minister did not however go on to join the farmer, but went to the house, which stood close at hand, with its low gable toward him. Late summer still lorded it in the land; only a few fleecy clouds shared the blue of the sky with the ripening sun, and on the hot ridges the air pulsed and trembled, like vaporized layers of mother-of-pearl.
At the end of the idle lever, no sleepy old horse was now making his monotonous rounds; his late radiance, born of age and sunshine, was quenched in the dark of the noonday stall. But the peac.o.c.k still strutted among the ricks, as conscious of his glorious plumage, as regardless of the ugliness of his feet as ever; now and then checking the rhythmic movement of his neck, undulating green and blue, to scratch the ground with those feet, and dart his beak, with apparently spiteful greed, at some tiny crystal of quartz or pickle of grain they exposed; or, from the towering steeple of his up lifted throat, to utter his self-satisfaction in a hideous cry.
In the gable before him, Mr. Robertson pa.s.sed a low window, through which he had a glimpse of the pretty, old-fashioned parlour within, as he went round to the front, to knock at the nearer of two green-painted doors.
Mrs. Blatherwick herself came to open it, and finding who it was that knocked--of all men the most welcome to her in her present mood--received him with the hearty simplicity of an evident welcome.
For was he not a minister? and was not he who caused all her trouble, a minister also? She was not, indeed, going to lay open her heart and let him see into its sorrow; for to confess her son a cause of the least anxiety to her, would be faithless and treacherous; but the unexpected appearance of Mr. Robertson brought her, nevertheless, as it were the dawn of a winter morning after a long night of pain.
She led him into the low-ceiled parlour, the green gloom of the big hydrangea that filled the front window, and the ancient scent of the withered rose-leaves in the gorgeous china basin on the gold-bordered table-cover. There the minister, after a few kind commonplaces, sat for a moment, silently pondering how to enter upon his communication. But he did not ponder long, however; for his usual way was to rush headlong at whatever seemed to harbour a lion, and come at once to the death-grapple.
Marion Blatherwick was a good-looking woman, with a quiet strong expression, and sweet gray eyes. The daughter of a country surgeon, she had been left an orphan without means; but was so generally respected, that all said Mr. Blatherwick had never done better than when he married her. Their living son seemed almost to have died in his infancy; their dead daughter, gone beyond range of eye and ear, seemed never to have left them: there was no separation, only distance between them.
"I have taken the liberty, Mrs. Blatherwick, of coming to ask your help in a great perplexity," began Mr. Robertson, with an embarra.s.sment she had never seen in him before, and which bewildered her not a little.
"Weel, sir, it"s an honour done me--a great honour, for which I hae to thank ye, I"m sure!" she answered.
"Bide ye, mem, till ye hear what it is," rejoined the minister. "We, that is, my wife and mysel, hae a puir la.s.s at hame i" the hoose. We hae ta"en a great interest in her for some weeks past; but noo we"re "maist at oor wits" en" what to do wi" her neist. She"s sair oot o" hert, and oot o" health, and out o" houp; and in fac" she stan"s in sair, ay, desperate need o" a cheenge."
"Weel, that ouchtna to mak muckle o" a diffeeclety atween auld friens like oorsels, Maister Robertson!--Ye wad hae us tak her in for a whilie, till she luiks up a bit, puir thing?--Hoo auld may she be?"
"She can hardly be mair nor twenty, or aboot that--sic like as your ain bonnie la.s.sie would hae been by this time, gien she had ripent here i"stead o" gaein awa to the gran" finishin schuil o" the just made perfec. Weel min" I her bonny face! And, "deed, this ane"s no" that unlike yer ain Isy! She something favours her."
"Eh, sir, fess her to me! My hert"s waitin for her! Her mither maunna lowse her! She couldna stan" that!"
"She has nae mither, puir thing!--But ye maun dee naething in a hurry; I maun tell ye aboot her first!"
"I"m content "at she"s a frien o" yours, sir. I ken weel ye wad never hae me tak intil my hoose are that was na fit--and a" the lads aboot the place frae ae mornin til anither!"
"Indeed she _is_ a frien o" mine, mem; and I hae never a dreid o"
onything happenin ye wadna like. She"s in ower sair trouble to cause ony anxiety. The fac" is, she"s had a terrible misfortun!"
The good woman started, drew herself up a little, and said hurriedly,
"There"s no a wean, is there?"
""Deed is there, mem!--but pairt o" the meesery is, the bairn"s disappeart; and she"s brackin her heart aboot "im. She"s maist oot o"
her min", mem! No that she"s onything but perfecly reasonable, and gies never a grain o" trouble! I canna doobt she"d be a great help til ye, and that ilka minute ye saw fit to lat her bide. But she"s jist hunt.i.t wi" the idea that she pat the bairnie doon, and left him, and kens na whaur.--Verily, mem, she"s are o" the lambs o" the Lord"s ain flock!"
"That"s no the w"y the lambs o" _his_ flock are i" the w"y o" behavin themsels!--I fear me, sir, ye"re lattin yer heart rin awa wi" yer jeedgment!"
"I hae aye c.o.o.nt.i.t Mary Magdalen are o" the Lord"s ain yowies, that he left the lave i" the wilderness to luik for: this is sic anither! Gien ye help Him to come upon her, ye"ll cairry her hame "atween ye rej"icin!
And ye min" hoo he stude "atween are far waur nor her, and the ill men that would fain hae shamet her, and sent them oot like sae mony tykes--thae gran" Pharisees--wi their tails tuckit in "atween their legs!--Sair affront.i.t they war, doobtless!--But I maun be gaein, mem, for we"re no vera like to agree! My Maister"s no o" ae min" wi" you, mem, aboot sic affairs--and sae I maun gang, and lea" ye to yer ain opingon! But I would jist remin" ye, mem, that she"s at this present i"