Sez she, "There is no dungeons below; the folks come out into a vast place as big as this. There is just as much to see down there as there is here, just as many people and just as much amus.e.m.e.nt."
"Amus.e.m.e.nt!" sez I in a holler voice.
After I left her, I see a whisk broom hangin" up in a handy place, and it had a printed liebill on it, "This whisk broom free." And as my parmetty dress had got kinder dusty a slidin" and wobblin" as I had slode and wobbled, I went to brush off my skirt with it, when all of a sudden somebody or sunthin" gin me a stunnin" blow right in my arm that held the brush. I dropped it without waitin" to argy the matter, and I don"t know to this day who or what struck me and what it wuz for. But my conscience wuz clear; I hadn"t done nothin".
I santered on and entered an enclosure seemin"ly made of innocent lookin" fence rails. I wuz kinder attracted to it, for it looked some like the rail fence round our gooseberry bushes. But for the lands sake! it wuzn"t like any fence in Jonesville or Zoar, for though it looked innocent, it shet me in tight and I couldn"t git out.
I wandered round and round, and out and in, and it wuz a good half hour before I got out, and I d"no but I"d have been there to this day, if a man hadn"t come and opened a gate and let me out. Only one thought kep" up my courage in my fruitless wanderings. It wuz all done in plain sight of everybody, and I could see for myself that Josiah wuzn"t kep" there in captivity.
There wuz a tall pole in the middle of the Amaze, as they call it (well named, for it is truly amazin"), and the liebill on that pole read, "Climb the pole and ring the bell on it, and we will give you a prize."
I didn"t try to climb that pole, and wouldn"t if I had been a athleet.
How did I know but it would turn into a writhin" serpent, and writhe with me? No, I thought I wouldn"t take another resk in that dredful spot. And I wuz glad I thought so, for jest a little ways off, some honest, easy lookin" benches stood invitin" the weary pa.s.ser-by to set down and rest and recooperate. And right there before my eyes some good lookin" folks sot down on "em trustin"ly, and the hull bench fell over back with "em and then riz up agin, they fallin" and risin" with it.
I hastened away and thought I would go up into the second story agin and mebby ketch sight of my pardner, for the crowd had increased. And as I stood there skannin" the immense crowd below to try to ketch a glimpse of my lawful pardner, all to once I see the folks below wuz laughin" at me. I felt to see if my braize veil hung down straight and graceful, and my front hair wuz all right, and my cameo pin fastened.
But nothin" wuz amiss, and I wondered what could it be. The balcony wuz divided off into little s.p.a.ces, five or six feet square, and I stood in one, innocent as a lamb (or mebby it would be more appropriate to say a sheep), and leanin" on the railin", and one sa.s.sy boy called out:
"Where wuz you ketched? Are you tame? Wuz you ketched on the Desert of Sara? Did Teddy ketch you for the Government?" and I never knowed till I got down what they wuz laughin" at.
The little boxes in the balcony wuz painted on the outside to represent animal cages. On the one where I had been wuz painted the sign Drumedary. Josiah Allen"s wife took for a drumedary--The idee!
But the view I got of the crowd below wuz impressive, and though it seemed to me that everybody in New York and Brooklyn and the adjacent villages and country, wuz all there a Steeple Chasin", yet I knowed there wuz jest as many dreamin" in Dreamland and bein" luny in Luny Park. And Surf Avenue wuz full, and what they called the Bowery of Coney Island, and all the amus.e.m.e.nt places along the sh.o.r.e. And all on "em on the move, jostlin" and bein" jostled, foolin" and bein" fooled, laughin" and bein" laughed at.
Why, I wuz told and believe, that sometimes a million folks go to Coney Island on a holiday. And I wuz knowin" myself to over three thousand orphan children goin" there at one time to spend a happy day, the treat bein" gin "em by some big-hearted men. Plenty to eat and drink, and a hull day of enjoyment, candy, pop corn, circus, etc., bright day, happy hearts, how that day will stand out aginst the dull gray background of their lives! And them men ort to hug themselves thinkin" the thought, over three thousand happinesses wuz set down to their credit in the books of the Recordin" Angel. And I sez to myself, "Samantha, you ort to speak well of anything that so brightens the lives of the children of the great city."
As I went into Dreamland Park, it seemed agin as if all the folks in the city wuz there in the immense inner court, surrounded by amus.e.m.e.nts on every side. They wuz comin" and goin", talkin", laughin", hurryin", santerin", to and fro, fro and to. Lots on "em talkin" language I never hearn before, but I thought, poor things, you never had the advantage of livin" in Jonesville, so I overlooked it in "em.
[Ill.u.s.tration: _"As I went into Dreamland it seemed as if all the folks in the city was there." (See page 266)_]
I see most the first thing as I entered, a place called Creation, and feelin" dubersome that any thing more could be created than what I"d seen that day, I bought a ticket and went in, and to my glad surprise, I found it wuz some like a prayer meetin". For a man with a loud preachin" voice quoted a lot of Scripter most the first thing. After we all got seated it turned dark as pitch all in a minute. But you could dimly see a vast waste of water, kinder movin" and swashin" to and fro, as if some great force wuz workin" down below. And out of the darkness we hearn that Voice:
"In the beginning G.o.d created the Heavens and the Earth, and the Earth wuz without form and void, and darkness wuz on the face of the deep."
Anon the fiery energy that wuz makin" a planet, wuz hearn in deafenin"
peals of thunder, and blazed through the sky in sheets of lightnin"
and dartin" b.a.l.l.s of flame, quietin" down some after awhile. And the Voice continued:
"The spirit of G.o.d moved on the face of the deep. And G.o.d said, Let there be light; and there wuz light."
And slowly a faint light dawned and growed brighter and brighter and fleecy clouds appeared. The sky growed golden and rosy in the east, and the sun come up in splendor. Livin" forms appeared in the water, monsters of all kinds and sizes, queerer than any dog I ever see, and the Voice went on:
"And G.o.d separated the water from the land." Little peaks of land emerged from the water or it seemed as if the water receeded from them, and gradually the dry land appeared, and soon queer livin" forms appeared on it. And gradually, with green gra.s.s and verdure, it become fit for the home of man, and then Adam and Eve appeared. They wuzn"t clothed in much besides innocence, but somehow they didn"t look so immodest as some of the fashonably dressed females of to-day, with dekolitay and peek-a-boo waists, and skin-tight drapery.
There wuz good Bible talk and sacred music all through the show. And I felt as if I had looked on and seen a world made right before my eyes, and that I would dearly love to make a few myself if I had time, and Josiah wuz willin". I wuz highly delighted with it and said as much to the female who sot next to me. She had a discontented, onhappy face, and I guess she had enough to make her so, for her husband who sot by her kep" findin" fault with her all the time, till at last she turned--for you know a angle worm will turn if it is trod on enough--and she sez to me, but meant it for her pardner I knowed:
"The lecturer ort to gone on and told how sneakin" mean Adam treated his wife, eatin" the apple, I"ll bet down to the very core, and then misusin" her for givin" it to him, and puttin" all the blame on her for bringin" sin into the world, when he wuz jest as much to blame as she wuz."
Sez her husband, "You have to slur men all the time, don"t you? You can"t see or hear anything without findin" sunthin" to complain of about men. I despise such a sperit; men don"t have it."
Now, I love justice, and I hate to see my sect imposed upon, and then whenever or wherever I travel, I always bear with me the honorary t.i.tle I won honorably. Jest as men take with "em on sea or land their t.i.tles of B. A. or D. D., just so I ever carry the t.i.tle, won by high minded and strenous effort, Josiah Allen"s wife, P. A. and P. I.--Public Adviser and Private Investigator. Here, I thought, is need for a P. A. So I sez to her, yet in a voice her pardner couldn"t help hearin":
"I hearn once of a husbands" meetin" in a revival, when the minister asked every man to git up who had complaints to make about his wife.
Every man sprung to his feet to once, except one lone man by the door.
And the minister sez, "My friend, you are one man in a million who have no complaints to make about your wife." The man sez, "That hain"t it; I"m paralyzed, I can"t _git_ up.""
I d"no as the husband I aimed this at took it kind or not, but he didn"t nag his wife any more in my hearin".
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
IN WHICH I CONTINUE MY SEARCH FOR JOSIAH THROUGH DREAMLAND, HUNTIN"
FOR HIM IN VAIN, AND RETURN TO BILDAD"S AT NIGHT, WEARY AND DESPAIRIN"
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
IN WHICH I CONTINUE MY SEARCH FOR JOSIAH THROUGH DREAMLAND, HUNTIN"
FOR HIM IN VAIN, AND RETURN TO BILDAD"S AT NIGHT, WEARY AND DESPAIRIN"
Creation wuz such a good show I felt considerable rested and refreshed when it wuz over. And I thought the woman looked quite a little perter; it duz down-trod folks lots of good to have somebody take their part. I felt kinder good to think I had lightened a sister female"s sperit a little, and wuz walkin" along quite comfortable in mind when like an arrow out of a bo, the old pain and anxiety stabbed me afresh. Another hour gone and Josiah Allen not found! What shall I do? Where shall I turn the eyes of my spectacles? Jest as I wuz askin"
this question to my troubled soul I hearn a boy speak to another one about a futur" state of punishment in sich a vulgar and familiar way that I turned round to once, carryin" out my roll of Promisicous Adviser, and I sez, "You wicked boys you, to talk so light of your future states, I wonder you dast! If I wuz your mother and had had your bringin" up, you wouldn"t dast!"
They looked real impudent at me, and one on "em sez, "You hain"t the money to go with, that"s what ails you."
I sez solemnly, "Riches is a snare. I know how hard it is for the eye of a needle to have a camel git through it; I know how the rich man longed for a drop of water. And you"d better meditate on these things and try to git used to heat, instead of talkin" light about "em!" I don"t know how much longer I should have gone on as a P. A. and P. I.
but the woman I had befriended stepped up and sez, "He means the show there." And lookin" up, if you"ll believe it, I see the words "h.e.l.l Gate," and sez she, "I have got two tickets and my husband don"t care about goin", won"t you go with me?"
I thought to myself, he probably thinks he"ll have chances to sample it in the futur, but mebby he wuz jest sulky. But I only sez to her, "It is the last place I ever laid out to go unless I wuz obleeged to.
But lead on," sez I recklessly, "I"ll foller." For the thought had come to me onbid, How did I know how fur Josiah Allen had back-slided? How did I know but I"d find him there?
[Ill.u.s.tration: _"We got in a small boat and wuz carried round and round till we dived into a dark tunnel."_]
But to my great surprise--and I wish Elder Minkley could see it, I thought mebby it would modify his sermons some--the first thing we see wuz a great trough of water, and I said to the woman in surprise, "I never expected that folks would go to this hot place by water!" But we got into a small boat and wuz carried round and round like a whirlpool, till the boat got in the very center, when it dived down into a dark tunnel.
At the further end we climbed out onto a platform, and found ourselves in a long, low-vaulted place, some like a immense tunnel. We could jest ketch a glimpse of a light way off at the end, and we sot off for it, I lookin" clost and sharp on every side for my pardner, hopin" and dreadin" to find him there. When all of a sudden, the most terrific yells and shrieks sounded on every side and we see cages of wild animals on both sides of us movin" up and down howlin" and snarlin".
Sez the woman, "They"re men dressed up as wild beasts."
Sez I, "Have they got to stay here always? Do you spoze it is wrong doin" that has changed "em into wild animals?" Sez I, "Judgin" from the papers some on "em wouldn"t need much of a turn." But oh, I groaned to myself, "Is Josiah Allen turned into a bear or a cammy leapord! Is he here? I don"t believe," sez I to myself, "he has ever been bad enough to be turned into anything worse than a sheep or a rooster." And as I didn"t hear any blattin" or crowin", and knowed that if he had seen me he would have tried to communicate with his beloved pardner, I felt hopeful he wuzn"t there.
We went on and as soon as we got out she asked me if I didn"t want to see the Incubator babies, and bein" agreeable to the idee, we went and see "em. There they lay in gla.s.s cases, pretty little creeters lookin"
like wee bits of dolls, I felt sad as I looked down on "em, and thought on the hard journey them tiny feet must set out on from them gla.s.s boxes. What rough crosses the little fingers had got to grasp holt of, and onbeknown to me my mind fell onto the follerin" poetry--
"Our crosses are made from different trees, But we all of us have our Calvaries; We may climb the mount from a different side, But we all go up to be crucified."