"Forget about it man. I need your head in this one. You gotta get your rep back, man. Boon"s on some s.h.i.t tonight, you gotta have that guard up. He"s a crazy mother f.u.c.ker."
Boon, the low-life sc.u.m I"m fighting tonight. I remember him. I"d been in that cage with him before when he earned his patch.
He was good...
Real good.
He didn"t care about sinking his teeth into whatever artery came close.
"I can"t fight," I say quietly.
"I ain"t the one pushing this, brother, Mac is. Rev told me about the accident. Don"t let this a.s.shole hit you in the head, that"s all I ask. Mac might say otherwise but we don"t want you dead."
"Maybe I should. I don"t want to f.u.c.king remember any of this."
We walk out into the rowdy, drunken crowd who are standing around a makeshift cage illuminated by trash-can fires. They shout and cheer as I enter the ring. I can see Mia standing there twirling her hair and watching me, letting some a.s.shole whisper sweet bulls.h.i.t into her ear. There"s other patched Dragon"s who I can"t remember or haven"t met and a few crews in from out of town for the weekend.
Garrett steps forward from the group and puts his palm on the cage. I step closer so he doesn"t have to shout over the crowd.
"Why the f.u.c.k did you do this?" I ask, baring my teeth.
"I trusted you with my life, Landon. Always have. We"re brothers. This club is our family and you"ve been saying words about it. If I"m gonna ride with you again, I need to know you"re part of this family. I know you don"t mean the s.h.i.t you"ve been saying. Mac thinks this might help you remember..."
I don"t give him a response. I just turn heel and spot Boon as he hops up and down on the far side of the cage. Soon as that bell rings, he"s going to come for me looking for blood. He"d had his eyes on being enforcer for a long time now. This is his chance and I know it. Pit-bull versus pit-bull.
I don"t know how I"m going to pull this off right now, not when my world has come crashing down in pieces again. I"m remembering more and more about Mia... That b.i.t.c.h. She had everyone wrapped round her little finger. Long as she was here, Mac wasn"t really the one running the club. All she had to do was have a "talk" with his c.o.c.k, and he"d do anything she wanted just like everybody else.
Except me.
I was never with Mia when I went to Baddock, and I"m starting to remember exactly why I went looking for Lucy. I have more questions than answers, but for now, I need to put it all aside and win this f.u.c.king fight. I need to get back the respect of the club, of my brothers, and then I can set about making all this right again.
Boon, skips around the ring, eyeing me out with wild eyes and laughing maniacally. He"s a G.o.dd.a.m.ned viper fighter- He moves quick and strikes hard. All I need is to get him on the floor where I can use my strength advantage. I walk across the cage to meet him, holding out my fists and checking him at the center.
DING! The round starts.
I get low, blocking a kick that Boon tries to land on my head. My instincts and muscle memory seem to be saving me. My reactions aren"t too bad for now.
Back and forth we go where I land a few solid hits and so does he, pummeling my ribcage.
My head is starting to throb. I feel faint. I spit onto the floor and approach Boon again.
I take my stance low and grapple Boon to the ground, finding a hold where I can pummel his f.u.c.king ugly face to a pulp. A tooth comes loose beneath his mouth guard. That riles him up enough. He rolls with me a while until I get him in a triangle, but he manages to find a s.p.a.ce to send a sharp hook into my jaw. I back off, stand up and topple a little. I"m dizzy but I can shake it off.
My eyesight gets darker.
Boon"s looks hurt, tired.
So am I.
We"re eyeing each other out a while, catching our breath, circling the cage until he lunges again. I duck through to the other side and send a kick into his chest. He flips me, pinning me with a hard thud to the cardboard on the floor. I"m winded and gasp for some breath.
He hits me a good few times. I escape, but only just.
Beyond Boon"s shoulder, I can see Lucy standing there in the crowd...
Or someone who looks like her... My eyes blur as a splash of blood rolls off my brow.
Vision or not, it distracts me enough for Boon to swipe again. I duck another incoming jab then throw an upper cut. More blood stains the floor.
I look beyond him again toward the crowd....
That"s no concussed mirage I"m seeing. It"s her.
"Lucy?" I mouth and trip backward.
She can"t be here. She"s gonna get herself killed.
She"s got her hands cupped over her mouth. I feel some cool blood trickling from my face. I skip around the floor but Boon gets another shot in. I crease inward as one of his kicks land into my ribs. He moves in to finish me but I burst up with a vicious uppercut, sending him flailing back into the cage. I follow, punishing him for every drop of blood I"ve spilled. I think of Lucy. I think of what we were once. I think of why I was running to find her. Left hook, right cross, then I plant one into Boon"s jawline and watch his eyes roll.
He"s done.
Boon crashes to the floor and I look up, watching as Lucy steps through the doors at the edge of the warehouse. The whole crowd is going crazy as I force my way out of the cage. Garrett is shoving my cut back into my b.l.o.o.d.y hands, the patches sewn back onto the leather.
I take it, but I don"t stop.
I barge as best I can through the crowd, pushing people aside as I make my way toward the doors. I have to find her. I have to stop her... My head throbs and my muscles ache, but with every step the dots are connecting inside my skull. I"m piecing together the brief stills I"d been gathering the last few days into what really happened. My past... My time with Lucy...
I remember.
I remember everything.
Six years ago...
I showed up outside Lucy"s house at Mac"s request. I saw him with Retch, the old vice president as they were carrying out Lucy"s distraught mother. Mac was holding his leather glove over her mouth to make sure she didn"t make a lot of noise.
That was my cue.
I walked inside.
I won"t lie. My body went into shock when I saw him.
I"d seen a lot in my eighteen years on this earth but never a f.u.c.king dead body with its life freshly taken. I found him right where Retch told me they"d leave him- On the floor of the kitchen with a tea towel covering his face. I lifted the towel to stare evil in the face. I thought it"d bring me some kind of sick happiness to know this b.a.s.t.a.r.d was gone, but that"s not what I felt. Daryl"s face was purple, his eyes wide open, slightly protruding from his skull. Mac had made it a quick job, pressing a blade into the p.r.i.c.k"s lung until he"d taken his last breath in this world.
I gagged loudly, a new sickly smell creeping in, but I carried on with what I"d promised. I would bury Daryl, and Lucy would be free...
All I had to do was remove him without waking the neighbors.
The van was pulled up the side of the house ready to be loaded. It took me some time but I got Daryl and his weight down the back porch stairs. That"s about when everything went sideways...
"What...What happened?" Her voice p.r.i.c.kled in my ears.
I looked up to see her standing there: Young Lucy, dressed in her short nightgown, sleepy eyed and in shock.
She stood still, expressionless at first then burst into tears and followed down the steps and outside to stand over her father"s corpse. I wiped sweat from my brow and backed away.
"You...you killed him?" she breathed.
In that moment, Lucy was pulled into the strong orbit of the club. Mac loved doing that- Getting people trapped in the web to manipulate them to his advantage. She wasn"t supposed to be here tonight. Mac made it clear she was going to be gone...
Now she was a witness.
"I...I had to. I had to."
She stared at me a while and in that moment, I thought she hated me for good. That was the first moment I thought I"d lost her and it crushed me. But none of that mattered because I knew she would be safe now. She didn"t have to hide bruises anymore. She didn"t have to hide any of the horrible s.h.i.t this man had done to her.
After some heavy silence between us, she stepped forward and hugged me. I wanted to collapse in relief but I knew I had to keep pushing through.
"I"ll help you," she said and wouldn"t let me argue otherwise.
Then it was done.
We buried the monster, and we lost ourselves.
Sending her away was the biggest mistake of my life.
I wasn"t going to lose her again.
26.
It"s almost pitch black outside except the light of the moon. Rows of hogs lined up outside the warehouse but I can"t see her anywhere.
A low grumble makes me turn my head to the left.
Some red rear lights illuminate the asphalt. I sprint as fast as my sprained hamstring will allow. "Lucy!" my voice yells as loud as it can over the hog"s rumbling engine. It"s Mac"s bike. The crazy girl stole Mac"s ride!
Over my shoulder I can hear someone calling me back to celebrate but I ignore it all. Lucy is backing out and I make it close enough to leap and grab onto one of the handlebars.
"Don"t you dare f.u.c.king leave. I"m not letting you go this time. Not after all of this."
"f.u.c.k you! f.u.c.k the lot of you. You all deserve this h.e.l.lhole," she"s so upset, her hands tremble as she tries to clip her helmet on.
"Lucy, don"t do this."
"You will always be a Dragon. You will always pick them over me and I get it, you want a family you never had. But that, what I saw in there, that"s not the Landon I remember. Landon wouldn"t f.u.c.king dog fight for some old motherf.u.c.ker who tried..." She trails off.
I hold tightly onto Lucy"s clammy hands as she climbs off the bike and stamps the gravel beneath her.
"I"m not your priority anymore," her voice quietens. "I get that. So let me go."
"You are my only priority, Luce. Everything in my life, everything I"ve done... I did it to protect you from all of this darkness."
"It hasn"t worked."
"But I remember..."
"Y-you remember?" She doesn"t believe me.
"I think...I think I do..."
"No...NO!" Lucy throws her hands in the air and backs away. "I-I can"t f.u.c.king do this." She turns on her heel but I catch her wrist.
"I wouldn"t have brought you back here if I knew it would hurt you this much."
"Are you kidding me?"
"Look at me, Luce. I didn"t know. I didn"t know what this town was but you have nothing to be afraid of."
She mumbles some frustrated gibberish then grabs at air, probably wishing it could be my own throat.
I run my fingers through my hair and bite my lip, feeling myself choking up at her current state. I want to hold her but I don"t know if she wants me to.
"I do remember," I find the courage to say. Because I hope whatever I can remember is the actual truth and I"m not missing anything, any details that might hurt her.
"What? What do you remember?"
"I remember that night. I remember us."
It"s a long silent vacuum we stand in together, the lull of the crowd behind us but a distant and insignificant hum. The world spinning around us like it does. Nothing matters but this, us.
"We buried Daryl Palermo and I said we could never be together again."
Finally, Lucy"s hands rest on my folded arms. We stand there, unable to look each other in the eye a moment, cautiously optimistic of what this connection means. She"s not alone to shoulder that burden again. I"m here with her.
I pull her into me. I feel tears stinging at my eyes but I don"t let them fall. She holds me tighter.
"You didn"t kill him though," she says quietly.
I retreat a little bit. "How do you know that?"
"Why did you say you did it? Why did you have me believing that for all these years?"