James did not wait for David"s return. He went back to his own lodging, and, taking the note out of his pocket-book, spread it before him. His first thought was that he had wared 89 on his enemy"s fine clothes, and James loved gold and hated foppish, extravagant dress; his next that he had saved Andrew Starkie 89, and he knew the old usurer was quietly laughing at his folly. But worse than all was the alternative he saw as the result of his sinful purchase: if he used it to gratify his personal hatred, he deeply wounded, perhaps killed, his dearest love and his oldest friend. Hour after hour he sat with the note before him. His good angel stood at his side and wooed him to mercy. There was a fire burning in the grate, and twice he held the paper over it, and twice turned away from his better self.
The watchman was calling "half-past two o"clock," when, cold and weary with his mental struggle, he rose and went to his desk. There was a secret hiding-place behind a drawer there, in which he kept papers relating to his transactions with Andrew Starkie, and he put it among them. "I"ll leave it to its chance," he muttered; "a fire might come and burn it up some day. If it is G.o.d"s will to save Donald, he could so order it, and I am fully insured against pecuniary loss." He did not at that moment see how presumptuously he was throwing his own responsibility on G.o.d; he did not indeed want to see anything but some plausible way of avoiding a road too steep for a heart weighed down with earthly pa.s.sion to dare.
Then weeks and months drifted away in the calm regular routine of David"s life. But though there were no outward changes, there was a very important inward one. About sixteen months after Donald"s departure he returned to visit Christine. James, at Christine"s urgent request, absented himself during this visit; but when he next called at David"s, he perceived at once that all was not as had been antic.i.p.ated. David had little to say about him; Christine looked paler and sadder than ever. Neither quite understood why. There had been no visible break with Donald, but both father and daughter felt that he had drifted far away from them and their humble, pious life. Donald had lost the child"s heart he had brought with him from the mountains; he was ambitious of honors, and eager after worldly pleasures and advantages. He had become more gravely handsome, and he talked more sensibly to David; but David liked him less.
After this visit there sprang up a new hope in James" heart, and he waited and watched, though often with very angry feelings; for he was sure that Donald was gradually deserting Christine.
She grew daily more sad and silent; it was evident she was suffering.
The little Testament lay now always with her work, and he noticed that she frequently laid aside her sewing and read it earnestly, even while David and he were quietly talking at the fireside.
One Sabbath, two years after Donald"s departure, James met David coming out of church alone. He could only say, "I hope Christine is well."
"Had she been well, she had been wi" me; thou kens that, James."
"I might have done so. Christine is never absent from G.o.d"s house when it is open."
"It is a good plan, James; for when they who go regular to G.o.d"s house are forced to stay away, G.o.d himself asks after them. I hae no doubt but what Christine has been visited."
They walked on in silence until David"s house was in sight. "I"m no caring for any company earth can gie me the night, James; but the morn I hae something to tell you I canna speak anent to-day."
CHAPTER V.
The next day David came into the bank about noon, and said, "Come wi"
me to McLellan"s, James, and hae a mutton pie, it"s near by lunch-time." While they were eating it David said, "Donald McFarlane is to be wedded next month. He"s making a grand marriage."
James bit his lip, but said nothing.
"He"s spoken for Miss Margaret Napier; her father was ane o" the Lords o" Session; she"s his sole heiress, and that will mean 50,000, foreby the bonnie place and lands o" Ellenshawe."
"And Christine?"
"Dinna look that way, man. Christine is content; she kens weel enough she isna like her cousin."
"G.o.d be thanked she is not. Go away from me, David Cameron, or I shall say words that will make more suffering than you can dream off. Go away, man."
David was shocked and grieved at his companion"s pa.s.sion. "James," he said solemnly, "dinna mak a fool o" yoursel". I hae long seen your ill-will at Donald. Let it go. Donald"s aboon your thumb now, and the anger o" a poor man aye falls on himsel"."
"For G.o.d"s sake don"t tempt me farther. You little know what I could do if I had the ill heart to do it."
"Ow! ay!" said David scornfully, "if the poor cat had only wings it would extirpate the race of sparrows from the world; but when the wings arena there, James lad, it is just as weel to mak no boast o"
them."
James had leaned his head in his hands, and was whispering, "Christine! Christine! Christine!" in a rapid inaudible voice. He took no notice of David"s remark, and David was instantly sorry for it.
"The puir lad is just sorrowful wi" love for Christine, and that"s nae sin that I can see," he thought. "James," he said kindly, "I am sorry enough to grieve you. Come as soon as you can like to do it. You"ll be welcome."
James slightly nodded his head, but did not move; and David left him alone in the little boarded room where they had eaten. In a few minutes he collected himself, and, like one dazed, walked back to his place in the bank. Never had its hours seemed so long, never had the noise and traffic, the tramping of feet, and the banging of doors seemed so intolerable. As early as possible he was at David"s, and David, with that fine instinct that a kind heart teaches, said as he entered, "Gude evening, James. Gae awa ben and keep Christine company.
I"m that busy that I"ll no shut up for half an hour yet."
James found Christine in her usual place. The hearth had been freshly swept, the fire blazed brightly, and she sat before it with her white seam in her hand. She raised her eyes at James" entrance, and smilingly nodded to a vacant chair near her. He took it silently.
Christine seemed annoyed at his silence in a little while, and asked, "Why don"t you speak, James? Have you nothing to say?"
"A great deal, Christine. What now do you think of Donald McFarlane?"
"I think well of Donald."
"And of his marriage also?"
"Certainly I do. When he was here I saw how unfit I was to be his wife. I told him so, and bid him seek a mate more suitable to his position and prospects."
"Do you think it right to let yonder lady wed such a man with her eyes shut?"
"Are you going to open them?" Her face was sad and mournful, and she laid her hand gently on James" shoulder.
"I think it is my duty, Christine."
"Think again, James. Be sure it is your duty before you go on such an errand. See if you dare kneel down and ask G.o.d to bless you in this duty."
"Christine, you treat me very hardly. You know how I love you, and you use your power over me unmercifully."
"No, no, James, I only want you to keep yourself out of the power of Satan. If indeed I have any share in your heart, do not wrong me by giving Satan a place there also. Let me at least respect you, James."
Christine had never spoken in this way before to him; the majesty and purity of her character lifted him insensibly to higher thoughts, her gentleness soothed and comforted him. When David came in he found them talking in a calm, cheerful tone, and the evening that followed was one of the pleasantest he could remember. Yet James understood that Christine trusted in his forbearance, and he had no heart to grieve her, especially as she did her best to reward him by striving to make his visits to her father unusually happy.
So Donald married Miss Napier, and the newspapers were full of the bridegroom"s beauty and talents, and the bride"s high lineage and great possessions. After this Donald and Donald"s affairs seemed to very little trouble David"s humble household. His marriage put him far away from Christine"s thoughts, for her delicate conscience would have regarded it as a great sin to remember with any feeling of love another woman"s affianced husband; and when the struggle became one between right and wrong, it was ended for Christine. David seldom named him, and so Donald McFarlane gradually pa.s.sed out of the lives he had so sorely troubled.
Slowly but surely James continued to prosper; he rose to be cashier in the bank, and he won a calm but certain place in Christine"s regard.
She had never quite recovered the shock of her long illness; she was still very frail, and easily exhausted by the least fatigue or excitement. But in James" eyes she was perfect; he was always at his best in her presence, and he was a very proud and happy man when, after eight years" patient waiting and wooing, he won from her the promise to be his wife; for he knew that with Christine the promise meant all that it ought to mean.
The marriage made few changes in her peaceful life. James left the bank, put his savings in David"s business, and became his partner. But they continued to live in the same house, and year after year pa.s.sed away in that happy calm which leaves no records, and has no fate days for the future to date from.
Sometimes a letter, a newspaper, or some public event, would bring back the memory of the gay, handsome lad that had once made so bright the little back parlor. Such strays from Donald"s present life were always pleasant ones. In ten years he had made great strides forward.
Every one had a good word for him. His legal skill was quoted as authority, his charities were munificent, his name unblemished by a single mean deed.
Had James forgotten? No, indeed. Donald"s success only deepened his hatred of him. Even the silence he was compelled to keep on the subject intensified the feeling. Once after his marriage he attempted to discuss the subject with Christine, but the scene had been so painful he had never attempted it again; and David was swift and positive to dismiss any unfavorable allusion to Donald. Once, on reading that "Advocate McFarlane had joined the Free Kirk of Scotland on open confession of faith," James flung down the paper and said pointedly, "I wonder whether he confessed his wrong-doing before his faith or not."
"There"s nane sae weel shod, James, that they mayna slip," answered David, with a stern face. "He has united wi" Dr. Buchan"s kirk--there"s nane taken into that fellowship unworthily, as far as man can judge."
"He would be a wise minister that got at all Advocate McFarlane"s sins, I am thinking."
"Dinna say all ye think, James. They walk too fair for earth that naebody can find fault wi"."
So James nursed the evil pa.s.sion in his own heart; indeed, he had nursed it so long that he could not of himself resign it, and in all his prayers--and he did pray frequently, and often sincerely--he never named this subject to G.o.d, never once asked for his counsel or help in the matter.
Twelve years after his marriage with Christine David died, died as he had often wished to die, very suddenly. He was well at noon; at night he had put on the garments of eternal Sabbath. He had but a few moments of consciousness in which to bid farewell to his children.
"Christine," he said cheerfully, "we"ll no be lang parted, dear la.s.sie;" and to James a few words on his affairs, and then almost with his last breath, "James, heed what I say: "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall--obtain mercy.""