"I don"t suppose there ever was a ship called the Pursuit," continued Mrs. Gannett.
"Doesn"t sound like a ship"s name," murmured Mr. Gannett.
"Well, then, a few days later it said the Curlew was at Naples."
"I never went ash.o.r.e all the time we were at Naples," remarked the engineer casually.
"The parrot said you did," said Mrs. Gannett.
"I suppose you"ll believe your own lawful husband before that d.a.m.ned bird?" shouted Gannett, starting up.
"Of course I didn"t believe it, Jem," said his wife. "I"m trying to prove to you that the bird was not truthful, but you"re so hard to persuade."
Mr. Gannett took a pipe from his pocket, and with a small knife dug with much severity and determination a hardened plug from the bowl, and blew noisily through the stem.
"There was a girl kept a fruit-stall just by the harbour," said Mrs.
Gannett, "and on this evening, on the strength of having bought three-pennyworth of green figs, you put your arm round her waist and tried to kiss her, and her sweetheart, who was standing close by, tried to stab you. The parrot said that you were in such a state of terror that you jumped into the harbour and were nearly drowned."
Mr. Gannett having loaded his pipe lit it slowly and carefully, and with tidy precision got up and deposited the match in the fireplace.
"It used to frighten me so with its stories that I hardly knew what to do with myself," continued Mrs. Gannett "When you were at Suez-"
The engineer waved his hand imperiously.
"That"s enough," he said stiffly.
"I"m sure I don"t want to have to repeat what it told me about Suez,"
said his wife. "I thought you"d like to hear it, that"s all."
"Not at all," said the engineer, puffing at his pipe. "Not at all."
"But you see why I got rid of the bird, don"t you?" said Mrs. Gannett.
"If it had told you untruths about me, you would have believed them, wouldn"t you?"
Mr. Gannett took his pipe from his mouth and took his wife in his extended arms. "No, my dear," he said brokenly, "no more than you believe all this stuff about me."
"And I did quite right to sell it, didn"t I, Jem?"
"Quite right," said Mr. Gannett with a great a.s.sumption of heartiness.
"Best thing to do with it."
"You haven"t heard the worst yet," said Mrs. Gannett. "When you were at Suez-"
Mr. Gannett consigned Suez to its only rival, and thumping the table with his clenched fist, forbade his wife to mention the word again, and desired her to prepare supper.
Not until he heard his wife moving about in the kitchen below did he relax the severity of his countenance. Then his expression changed to one of extreme anxiety, and he restlessly paced the room seeking for light. It came suddenly.
"Jenkins," he gasped, "Jenkins and Mrs. Cluffins, and I was going to tell Cluffins about him writing to his wife. I expect he knows the letter by heart."
MONEY CHANGERS
Tain"t no use waiting any longer," said Harry Pilchard, looking over the side of the brig towards the Tower stairs. ""E"s either waiting for the money or else "e"s a-spending of it. Who"s coming ash.o.r.e?"
"Give "im another five minutes, Harry," said another seaman persuasively; "it "ud be uncommon "ard on "im if "e come aboard and then "ad to go an" get another ship"s crew to "elp "im celebrate it."
""Ard on us too," said the cook honestly. "There he is!"
The other glanced up at a figure waving to them from the stairs. ""E wants the boat," he said, moving aft.
"No "e don"t, Steve," piped the boy. ""E"s waving you not to. He"s coming in the waterman"s skiff."
"Ha! same old tale," said the seaman wisely. "Chap comes in for a bit o"
money and begins to waste it directly. There"s threepence gone; clean chucked away. Look at "im. Just look at him!"
""E"s got the money all right," said the cook, "there"s no doubt about that. Why, "e looks "arf as large again as "e did this morning."
The crew bent over the side as the skiff approached, and the fare, who had been leaning back in the stern with a severely important air, rose slowly and felt in his trousers-pocket.
"There"s sixpence for you, my lad," he said pompously. "Never mind about the change."
"All right, old slack-breeches," said the waterman with effusive good-fellowship: "up you get."
Three pairs of hands a.s.sisted the offended fare on board, and the boy hovering round him slapped his legs vigorously.
"Wot are you up to?" demanded Mr. Samuel Dodds, A.B., turning on him.
"Only dusting you down, Sam," said the boy humbly.
"You got the money all right, I s"pose, Sammy?" said Steve Martin.
Mr. Dodds nodded and slapped his breastpocket.
"Right as ninepence," he replied genially. "I"ve been with my lawyer all the arternoon, pretty near. "E"s a nice feller."
""Ow much is it, Sam?" inquired Pilchard eagerly.
"One "undred and seventy-three pun seventeen shillings an" ten pence,"
said the heir, noticing with much pleasure the effect of his announcement.
"Say it agin, Sam," said Pilchard in awed tones.
Mr. Dodds, with a happy laugh, obliged him. "If you"ll all come down the foc"sle," he continued, "I"ve got a bundle o" cigars an" a drop o"