6. It is not so hard if you begin early. The very flowers are object lessons. The wonderful mystery of life is wrapped in one flower, with its stamens, pistils and ovaries. Every child knows how an egg came in the nest, and takes it as a matter of course; why not go one step farther with them and teach the wonder, the beauty, the holiness that surrounds maternity anywhere? Why, centuries ago the Romans honored, and taught their boys to honor, the women in whose safety was bound up the future of their existence as a nation! Why should we do less?
7. Your sons and mine, your daughters and mine, need to be wisely taught and guarded just along these lines, if your sons and mine, your daughters and mine, are to grow up into a pure, healthy, Christian manhood and womanhood.
[Ill.u.s.tration]
{392} 8. [4]"How grand is the boy who has kept himself undefiled! His complexion clear, his muscles firm, his movements vigorous, his manner frank, his courage undaunted, his brain active, his will firm, his self-control perfect, his body and mind unfolding day by day. His life should be one song of praise and thanksgiving. If you want your boy to be such a one, train him, my dear woman, _to-day_, and his _to-morrow_ will take care of itself.
9. "Think you that good seed sown will bring forth bitter fruit? A thousand times, No! As we sow, so shall we reap. Train your boys in morality, temperance and virtue. Teach them to embrace good and shun evil. Teach them the true from the false; the light from the dark. Teach them that when they take a thing that is not their own, they commit a sin. Teach them that _sin means disobedience of G.o.d"s laws of every kind_.
10. "G.o.d made every organ of our body with the intention that it should perform a certain work. If we wish to see, we use our eyes; if we want to hear, our ears are called into use. In fact, nature teaches us the proper use of _all our organs_. I say to you, mother, and oh, so earnestly: "Go teach your boy that which you may never be ashamed to do, about these organs that make him _specially a boy_."
11. "Teach him they are called _s.e.xual organs_; that they are not impure, but of special importance, and made by G.o.d for a definite purpose. Teach him that there are impurities taken from the system in fluid form called urine, and that it pa.s.ses through the s.e.xual organs, but that nature takes care of that. Teach him that these organs are given as a sacred trust, that in maturer years he may be the means of giving life to those who shall live forever.
12. "Impress upon him that if these organs are abused, or if they are put to any use besides that for which G.o.d made them--and He did not intend they should be used at all until man is fully grown--they will bring disease and ruin upon those who abuse and disobey the laws which G.o.d has made to govern them. If he has ever learned to handle his _s.e.xual organs_, or to touch them in any way except to keep them clean, not to do it again. If he does he will not grow up happy, healthy and strong.
13. "Teach him that when he handles or excites the {393} s.e.xual organs all parts of the body suffer, because they are connected by nerves that run throughout the system; this is why it is called "self-abuse." The whole body is abused when this part of the body is handled or excited in any manner whatever. Teach them to shun all children who indulge in this loathsome habit, or all children who talk about these things. The sin is terrible, and is, in fact, worse than lying or stealing. For, although these are wicked and will ruin their souls, yet this habit of self-abuse will ruin both soul and body.
14. "If the s.e.xual organs are handled, it brings too much blood to these parts, and this produces a diseased condition; it also causes disease in other organs of the body, because they are left with a less amount of blood than they ought to have. The s.e.xual organs, too, are very closely connected with the spine and the brain by means of the nerves, and if they are handled, or if you keep thinking about them, these nerves get excited and become exhausted, and this makes the back ache, the brain heavy and the whole body weak.
15. "It lays the foundation for consumption, paralysis and heart disease.
It weakens the memory, makes a boy careless, negligent and listless. It even makes many lose their minds; others, when grown, commit suicide. How often mothers see their little boys handling themselves, and let it pa.s.s, because they think the boy will outgrow the habit, and do not realize the strong hold it has upon them. I say to you who love your boys--"Watch!"
16. "Don"t think it does no harm to your boy because he does not suffer now, for the effects of this vice come on so slowly that the victim is often very near death before you realize that he has done himself harm. The boy with no knowledge of the consequences, and with no one to warn him, finds momentary pleasure in its practice, and so contracts a habit which grows upon him, undermining his health, poisoning his mind, arresting his development, and laying the foundation for future misery.
17. "Do not read this book and forget it, for it contains earnest and living truths. Do not let false modesty stand in your way, but from this time on keep this thought in mind--"the saving of your boy." Follow its teachings and you will bless G.o.d as long as you live. Read it to your neighbors, who, like yourself, have growing boys, and urge them for the sake of humanity to heed its advice. {394}
18. "Right here we want to emphasize the importance of _cleanliness_. We verily believe that oftentimes these habits originate in a burning and irritating sensation about the organs, caused by a want of thorough washing.
19. "It is worthy of note that many eminent physicians now advocate the custom of circ.u.mcision, claiming that the removal of a little of the foreskin induces cleanliness, thus preventing the irritation and excitement which come from the gathering of the whiteish matter under the foreskin at the beginning of the glands. This irritation being removed, the boy is less apt to tamper with his s.e.xual organs. The argument seems a good one, especially when we call to mind the high physical state of those people who have practiced the custom.
20. "Happy is the mother who can feel she has done her duty, in this direction, while her boy is still a child. For those mothers, though, whose little boys have now grown to boyhood with the evil still upon them, and _you_, through ignorance, permitted it, we would say, "Begin at once; it is never too late." If he has not lost all will power, he can be saved. Let him go in confidence to a reputable physician and follow his advice. Simple diet, plentiful exercise in open air and congenial employment will do much.
Do not let the mind dwell upon evil thoughts, shun evil companions, avoid vulgar stories, sensational novels, and keep the thoughts pure.
21. "Let him interest himself in social and benevolent affairs, partic.i.p.ate in Sunday-school work, farmers" clubs, or any organizations which tend to elevate and inspire n.o.ble sentiment. Let us remember that "a perfect man is the n.o.blest work of G.o.d." G.o.d has given us a life which is to last forever, and the little time we spend on earth is as nothing to the ages which we are to spend in the world beyond; so our earthly life is a very important part of our existence, for it is here that the foundation is laid for either happiness or misery in the future. It is here that we decide our destiny, and our efforts to know and obey G.o.d"s laws in our bodies as well as in our souls will not only bring blessings to us in this life, but never-ending happiness throughout eternity."
22. A QUESTION.--How can a father chew and smoke tobacco, drink and swear, use vulgar language, tell obscene stories, and raise a family of pure, clean-minded children? LET THE ECHO ANSWER.
{396}
The Inhumanities of Parents.
[Ill.u.s.tration: AN OLD ADAGE: "HE WHO LOVES CHILDREN WILL DO YOU NO HARM."]
1. Not long ago a Presbyterian minister in Western New York whipped his three-year-old boy to death for refusing to say his prayers. The little fingers were broken; the tender flesh was bruised and actually mangled; strong men wept when they looked on the lifeless body. Think of a strong man from one hundred and fifty to two hundred pounds in weight, pouncing upon a little child, like a Tiger upon a Lamb, and with his strong arm inflicting physical blows on the delicate tissues of a child"s body. See its frail and trembling flesh quiver and its tender nervous organization shaking with terror and fear.
2. How often is this the case in the punishment of children all over this broad land! Death is not often the immediate consequence of this brutality as in the above stated case, but the punishment is often as unjust, and the physical const.i.tution of children is often ruined and the mind by fright seriously injured.
3. Everyone knows the sudden sense of pain, and sometimes dizziness and nausea follow, as the results of an accidental hitting of the ankle, knee or elbow against a hard substance, and involuntary tears are brought to the eyes; but what is such a pain as this compared with the pains of a dozen or more quick blows on the body of a little helpless child from the strong arm of a parent in a pa.s.sion? Add to this overwhelming terror of fright, the strangulating effects of sighing and shrieking, and you have a complete picture of child-torture.
4. Who has not often seen a child receive, within an hour or two of the first whipping, a second one, for some small ebullition of nervous irritability, which was simply inevitable from its spent and worn condition?
5. Would not all mankind cry out at the inhumanity of one who, as things are to-day, should propose the subst.i.tution of p.r.i.c.king or cutting or burning for whipping? It would, however, be easy to show that small jabs or p.r.i.c.ks or cuts are more human than the blows many children receive. Why may not lying be as legitimately cured by blisters made with hot coals as by black and blue spots made with a ruler or whip? The principle is the same; and if the principle is right, why not multiply methods?
6. How many loving mothers will, without any thought of cruelty, inflict half a dozen quick blows on the little hand of her child, and when she could no more take a pin and make {397} the same number of thrusts into the tender flesh, than she could bind the baby on a rack. Yet the pin-thrust would hurt far less, and would probably make a deeper impression on the child"s mind.
[Ill.u.s.tration]
7. We do not intend to be understood that a child must have everything that it desires and every whim and wish to receive special recognition by the parents. Children can soon be made to understand the necessity of obedience, and punishment can easily be brought about by teaching them self-denial. Deny them the use of a certain plaything, deny {398} them the privilege of visiting certain of their little friends, deny them the privilege of the table, etc., and these self-denials can be applied according to the age and condition of the child, with firmness and without any yielding. Children will soon learn obedience if they see the parents are sincere. Lessons of home government can be learned by the children at home as well as they can learn lessons at school.
8. The trouble is, many parents need more government, more training and more discipline than the little ones under their control.
9. Scores of times during the day a child is told in a short, authoritative way to do or not to do certain little things, which we ask at the hands of elder persons as favors. When we speak to an elder person, we say, would you be so kind as to close the door, when the same person making the request of a child will say, "_Shut the door._" "_Bring me the chair._"
"_Stop that noise._" "_Sit down there._" Whereas, if the same kindness was used towards the child it would soon learn to imitate the example.
10. On the other hand, let a child ask for anything without saying "please," receive anything without saying "thank you," it suffers a rebuke and a look of scorn at once. Often a child insists on having a book, chair or apple to the inconveniencing of an elder, and what an outcry is raised: "Such rudeness;" "Such an ill-mannered child;" "His parents must have neglected him strangely." Not at all: The parents may have been steadily telling him a great many times every day not to do these precise things which you dislike. But they themselves have been all the time doing those very things before him, and there is no proverb that strikes a truer balance between two things than the old one which weighs example over against precept.
11. It is a bad policy to be rude to children. A child will win and be won, and in a long run the chances are that the child will have better manners than its parents. Give them a good example and take pains in teaching them lessons of obedience and propriety, and there will be little difficulty in raising a family of beautiful and well-behaved children.
12. Never correct a child in the presence of others; it is a rudeness to the child that will soon destroy its self-respect. It is the way criminals are made and should always and everywhere be condemned.
13. But there are no words to say what we are or what we deserve, if we do this to the little children whom we {399} have dared for our own pleasure to bring into the perils of this life, and whose whole future may be blighted by the mistakes of our careless hands. There are thousands of young men and women to-day groaning under the penalties and burdens of life, who owe their misfortunes, their shipwreck and ruin to the ignorance or indifference of parents.
14. Parents of course love their children, but with that love there is a responsibility that cannot be shirked. The government and training of children is a study that demands a parent"s time and attention often much more than the claims of business.
15. Parents, study the problems that come up every day in your home.
Remember, your future happiness, and the future welfare of your children, depend upon it.
16. CRIMINALS AND HEREDITY.--Wm. M. F. Round was for many years in charge of the House of Refuge on Randall"s Island, New York, and his opportunities for observation in the work among criminals surely make him a competent judge, and he says in his letter to the New York Observer: "Among this large number of young offenders I can state with entire confidence that not one per cent. were children born of criminal parents; and with equal confidence I am able to say that the common cause of their delinquency was found in bad parental training, in bad companionship, and in lack of wholesome restraint from evil a.s.sociations and influences. It was this knowledge that led to the establishing of the House of Refuge nearly three-quarters of a century ago."
17. BAD TRAINING.--Thus it is seen from one of the best authorities in the United States that criminals are made either by the indifference or the neglect of parents, or both, or by too much training without proper judgment and knowledge. Give your children a good example, and never tell a child to do something and then become indifferent as to whether they do it or not. A child should never be told twice to do the same thing. Teach the child in childhood obedience and never vary from that rule. Do it kindly but firmly.
18. IF YOUR CHILDREN DO NOT OBEY OR RESPECT YOU in their childhood and youth, how can you expect to govern them when older and shape their character for future usefulness and good citizenship?
19. THE FUNDAMENTAL RULE.--Never tell a child twice to do the same thing.
Command the respect of your children, and there will be no question as to obedience.
{400}
Chast.i.ty and Purity of Character.
1. CHASt.i.tY is the purest and brightest jewel in human character. Dr.
Pierce in his widely known _Medical Adviser_ says: For the full and perfect development of mankind, both mental and physical, chast.i.ty is necessary.