"You"re serious...," he said, his voice trailing off.
"I"m as close to your mother"s age as I am to yours."
His hand went limp and dropped from hers.
"Wow," he stammered. "You look good. Really good."
She thought of the pizza and popcorn she"d been living on all weekend and knew her b.u.t.t was wider than it was a week ago. "Not that good." The only reason she looked good was because she was more careful with planning her wardrobe than she"d been a decade ago.
Matt cleared his throat and his voice dropped nearly an octave. "I still have to ask. How do you feel about babies?"
She opened her mouth but didn"t say the first thought that popped into her head, which was that instead of thinking about babies, she was thinking about menopause.
"I"m fifty years old, Matt." She squeezed her eyes shut for a few seconds. "Many of my friends are grandmothers."
"Then-"
Farrah held up her hands to stop him from saying any more. "You need to find someone your own age."
"But-"
She shook her head. "It"s not open for discussion."
His eyes widened. "I"m-"
She backed up. "I said this discussion is closed."
His eyes widened even more. His mouth hung open, but fortunately he didn"t speak.
Farrah stared into his eyes. She"d heard the expression that a person"s eyes were the window to his soul, and in Matt"s case that was certainly true. Depths of conflicting emotions warred in his eyes. He looked absolutely stricken.
Thinking about what could have been but now would never be, her heart probably ached as much as his.
The years most people spent searching for their life"s mate, she"d spent in mourning. Like most of her friends, she had met the man who was her other half. They fell in love and got engaged, just like a storybook romance. But they never got married. Just after they"d set a date, Ed was diagnosed with hepat.i.tis B. After a transfusion, he"d been infected with tainted blood and became terminal. So she wouldn"t be held liable for his escalating medical expenses, especially when his workplace benefits were reduced, he"d stopped the wedding, but they never stopped loving each other. She"d been with him when he died and thought his funeral would be the hardest day of her life. But it wasn"t. The day after the funeral, her best friend, Cindy"s mother, had been diagnosed with cancer and then lost the battle after three painful years. After that, the only way Farrah could deal with losing the two biggest loves of her life was by pouring her soul into helping Dave raise Cindy and teaching the children who came and went in her cla.s.sroom the best she knew how.
Now at fifty, she couldn"t be what Matt needed in his life-which was a wife who would be his soul mate. With the way the economy had gone in the last decade, she was thinking of ways to secure her retirement-not raise children. Since Matt was nearly forty, if men did indeed have a biological clock, his time was running short. He had a tender heart, and he needed to share that with a wife and children he didn"t have yet, not his herd of pets. In order to bond with the woman who would be his other half, he needed to meet and date women slightly younger than he was, not waste his time with her.
Farrah looked around the park. They were surrounded by families and couples who looked like one day they would be families.
That was the way Matt should be. Matt wasn"t even forty and had so much of his life ahead of him, while she was now officially middle aged, when most people started to wind down. She couldn"t be, as he"d called her earlier, his lady friend. Still, she didn"t want to stop seeing him. The more time she spent with him, the more she was growing increasingly fond of him.
If only she were two decades younger.
Farrah shook her head. She wouldn"t dream of things that would never happen, nor would she dwell on things she couldn"t change. But she could dwell on what she could have. Now that Matt knew and understood the parameters, things would be fine.
Matt cleared his throat. "At church, I introduced you as my lady friend. You-"
Farrah held her palm up to stop him from putting his foot in his mouth. She hadn"t wanted to embarra.s.s him then, and she didn"t want to embarra.s.s him now.
For just a moment, she thought of what it would be like to really be his lady friend and to have more than the quick brush of a kiss he"d given her on Sat.u.r.day. But that wasn"t going to happen.
"You don"t have to explain. I know you didn"t know that I was so much older than you. It"s okay. I understand. I can"t be your lady, but I can still be your friend. After all, with something blossoming between Kat and Tyler, I think we"re going to be seeing a lot of each other." Perhaps by saying they could be friends, the awkwardness would be gone, and they could make the best of things.
To save both of them from an embarra.s.sing conversation she was sure neither of them wanted to have, she secured Tippy"s leash around her wrist and motioned her head to the right. "Let"s go find Tyler and Kat and dig into that picnic you packed before it starts to rain."
At her words, the first drop landed on her nose and the skies opened up.
As people around them scattered, Tyler, Kat, and Rex appeared in the distance, running toward them at full tilt as the rain began to beat down.
Matt hunkered down to unclip the leash from Tippy"s collar then picked the dog up. Cradling her, he tensed, ready to run.
"I think we"re going to be eating in the car. Let"s go."
Chapter 8.
Matt stared up at the ceiling in the darkened bedroom.
The glowing numbers on his clock radio told him he had to be up in four hours to get to the clinic, and he hadn"t yet fallen asleep.
His body was exhausted but his brain was racing.
She wasn"t that close to his mother"s age. He didn"t know exactly how old his mother was without checking his contact list on his iPad, but he knew she was two or three years from retirement.
Farrah wasn"t close to that point. She was only closer than he was.
He flipped over and buried his face in his pillow. Beside him, Rex made a disgruntled snuffle, kicked him, and started to snore.
Matt wished he were snoring, but instead when he closed his eyes, visions of Farrah danced through his head.
Farrah petting the puppies. Farrah reminding Tyler about his manners. Farrah driving her car just a little above the speed limit then pretending to act guilty when he pointed it out. Farrah promising to practice her guitar lessons even when her fingers hurt.
He"d liked her before he found out her age, and now that he had time to think about it, her age didn"t really matter. He still liked everything about her. Her smile. Her sense of humor. The way she protected Kat and cared for Tippy. She loved her job and was good to others. From her comments following a short discussion on an article they"d read in the paper, he knew she didn"t cheat on her taxes.
All his life he"d prayed for G.o.d to send him a woman like Farrah who didn"t want to have children, but that hadn"t happened. Something about him naturally gravitated to that type. But every woman he started to develop feelings for had either told him or shown him in other ways that one day she would want to become a mother. As he reached his thirties, most single women outright asked him how he felt about having children, some even on the first date-making it also the last date.
So Matt had stayed single.
But now when he"d given up and resigned himself to being single and alone for the rest of his life, he met a wonderful, sweet woman.
He"d never believed in love at first sight-he usually scoffed at such things. But now that it had happened to him, he wanted to shout it from the rooftops.
Except he would be shouting alone.
He rolled over and stared at the ceiling again.
He wouldn"t have thought of seeking an older woman for a life"s mate. He couldn"t help but feel that finding Farrah was a gift.
If all she would commit to was being friends, then even though he didn"t know how to be just friends with a wonderful woman like Farrah, he was going to be the best friend she ever had, and then some.
Matt rolled onto his side and closed his eyes. As his body finally started to relax, he smiled, thinking of the dreams he would have and drifted off thinking of how he would make those dreams a reality.
Just as Farrah removed the ca.s.serole dish from the oven, the doorbell rang. She lifted the lid, inhaled deeply, set it on the counter, and went to see who it was.
"Kat? What are you doing here?"
Kat checked her watch then hugged her purse. "Uncle Luke dropped me off. I have to go to Tyler"s grandparents" place to help give the runt puppy her bottle right away."
"Why couldn"t he drop you off there instead of here?"
"Because you know where it is."
Kat also knew where it was. All she had to do was give Luke directions. Kat"s answer didn"t make sense or at least it didn"t to Farrah. Maybe to the teenage mind it did.
"You keep checking your watch. Are you in a hurry?"
"Yes."
Farrah waited but no explanation was forthcoming.
"Why?"
"Because she"s going to be hungry. I have to show Tyler how to feed her. Dr. Matt is dropping Tyler off."
"If Dr. Matt is going to be there, I"m sure he can show Tyler how to do it because he"s the one who showed you."
Kat"s eyes became wide. "But I want to do it."
There. Now the reason was stated. Because Kat wanted to feed the puppy.
Farrah pressed her palm over her rumbling tummy. If that puppy was half as hungry as she was, then the puppy had all her sympathy.
She hurried back into kitchen to tilt the lid so the ca.s.serole would cool, said good-bye to her supper, and led Kat to the car.
They had barely pulled out of the driveway when Kat turned to her. "I"m sorry for interrupting your supper. Maybe you can go have supper with Dr. Matt while Tyler and me feed the puppy."
"While Tyler and I feed the puppy."
"You"re going to feed the puppy? But I don"t want to go have supper with Dr. Matt. He"s so...old. He"s like, almost forty. Ish."
Farrah sighed. "So old."
"Yes, but he"s really nice." Kat"s voice lowered to a whisper. "I think he likes you."
The typical response would have been to say that she liked him, too, but that wasn"t something she was going to say to a hormonal teenager who was in the early ravaging stages of her first love. Farrah could only guess where the conversation would go once she said such a thing, and she wasn"t going to go down that road. "I"m not going to feed the puppy. I was correcting your grammar."
Kat mumbled something Farrah couldn"t hear and hung her head just like one of her primary students after she"d corrected their grammar in the cla.s.sroom.
"I don"t think I"m going to go out for supper with Dr. Matt. I"m sure he"s already had supper by now. How do you know he"s going to be driving Tyler to his grandparents" place?"
Kat pulled her cell phone out of her pocket, opened it to a text message, and held it up. "Tyler said so. He also said that Dr. Matt is hungry because he came right from his clinic to pick Tyler up. So if both of you are hungry, you can go eat something while we feed the puppy."
"That"s a lot of info for one little text message."
"It wasn"t one. It was more like ten." Kat grinned. "Uncle Luke got me unlimited texting."
Before Farrah could comment more on the alleged plan for the evening, Kat"s phone played a short melodic tone. "Eleven," she muttered, with her thumbs typing at the speed of light.
Farrah gave up.
It appeared she was going to have supper with Dr. Matt.
She wondered if Dr. Matt knew.
Chapter 9.
How do I look? Is this okay?"
"It would be better without the tie, Uncle Matt."
Matt checked himself one last time in the rearview mirror and yanked off the tie just as the light changed to green and the cars ahead of him began to move.
The boy was probably right. Matt was trying too hard and he knew it. Besides, the tie was crinkled from being squished in the pocket of his smock all day.
"They"re almost there."
"Tell me, when you"re actually with each other, face-to-face, do you talk or still text each other?"
"You"re so not funny, Uncle Matt," Tyler mumbled as he typed furiously with his thumbs, hit Send, and waited.
Matt shook his head. He did all his typing the old-fashioned way, with all his fingers and one thumb. Plus, he actually used his cell phone to...phone people. Go figure.
"Kat says they"re in the driveway." He typed some more, hit Send, and waited for ten seconds. "They"re getting out of the car."