CHAPTER XL
A PLEBEIAN LOVER
In need of a friend--My physician offers his friendship--I discover that he loves me, but he will never confess--I give him encouragement--We manage to persuade the King to further our intrigue--Not a bit repentant of my peccadilloes--Very submissive--Introduced to my lover"s wife 199
CHAPTER XLI
AN ATROCIOUS ROYAL SCANDAL
A royal couple that shall be nameless--The voluptuous d.u.c.h.ess--Her husband the worst of degenerates--"What monsters these royalties be"--Nameless outrages--A d.u.c.h.ess forced to have lovers--Ferdinand and I live like married folk--d.u.c.h.ess feared for her life--Her husband murdered her--I scold and humiliate my overbearing Grand Mistress--The medical report too horrible to contemplate 205
CHAPTER XLII
I LOSE ANOTHER OF MY LOVERS
Happily no scandal--Rewarded for bearing children--$1250--for becoming a mother--Royal poverty--Bernhardt, the black sheep, in hot water again--The King rebukes me for taking his part 213
CHAPTER XLIII
THE CROWN PRINCESS QUELLS A RIOT
Asked to play the coward, and I refuse--A hostler who would die for a look from me--Hostler marriages in royal houses--Anecdotes and unknown facts concerning royal ladies and their offspring--Refuse police escort and rioters acclaim me--Whole royal family proud of my feat 219
CHAPTER XLIV
THE NEW LOVER, AND "I PLAY THE HUSSY FOR FAIR"
Who is that most exquisite _Vortanzer?_--A lovely boy--"Blush, good white paper"--I long for Henry--My eyes reflect love--"I must see you tonight. Arrange with Lucretia"--Sorry I ever loved a man before Henry--Poetry even--I try to get him an office at court--Afraid women will steal him 227
CHAPTER XLV
LOVE AND THE HAPPINESS IT CONVEYS
My Grand Mistress suspects because I am so amiable--Pangs of jealousy--Every good-looking man pursued by women--A good story of my cousin, the d.u.c.h.ess Berri--We all go cycling together--The Vitzthums--Love making on the street--A mud bath 233
CHAPTER XLVI
FEARS FOR MY LOVE
Some reflections on queens of old who punished recreant lovers--Henry was in debt and I gave him money--Indignities by which some of that money was earned--Husband accompanies me to Loschwitz--Reflections on Frederick Augustus"s character 239
CHAPTER XLVII
LOVE"S INTERMEZZO
Bernhardt takes advantage of my day-dreams--My husband"s indolent _gaucherie_--Violent love-making--Ninon who loved families, not men--Does Bernhardt really love me? 245
CHAPTER XLVIII
GRAND MISTRESS TELLS HUSBAND I KEEP A DIARY
He wants to see it, but seems unsuspecting--Grand Mistress denies that she meant mischief, but I upbraid her unmercifully--Threaten to dismiss her like a thieving lackey 251
CHAPTER XLIX
ARISTOCRATIC VISITORS
I hear disquieting news about my lover"s character--The aristocracy a dirty lot--Love-making made easy by t.i.tled friends--Anecdotes of Richelieu and the Duke of Orleans--The German n.o.bleman who married Miss Wheeler and had to resign his birthright--The disreputable business the Pappenheims and other n.o.bles used to be in--I am afraid to question my lover as to charges 255
CHAPTER L
TO LIVE UNDER KING"S AND PRINCE GEORGE"S EYE
Abruptly ordered to the royal summer residence--The Vitzthums and Henry take flight--Enmeshed by Prince George"s intrigues--Those waiting for a crown have no friends--What I will do when Queen--No wonder Kings of old married only relatives--Interesting facts about relative marriages furnished by scientist 261
CHAPTER LI
COLD RECEPTION--ENEMIES ALL AROUND
Frederick Augustus gives his views on adultery--Doesn"t care personally, but "the King knows"--"Thank G.o.d, the King is ill"--I am deprived of my children--Have I got the moral strength to defy my enemies? 265
CHAPTER LII
PRINCE GEORGE REVEALS TO ME THE DEPTH OF HIS HATRED
A terrible interview--"The devil will come to claim you"--Uncertain how much the King and Prince George know--I break into the nursery and stay with my children all day--Prince George insults me in my own rooms and threatens prison if I disobey him 269
CHAPTER LIII
REVOLVER IN HAND, I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION
An insolent Grand Mistress, but of wonderful courage--Imprisonment, threats to kill have no effect on her--Disregards my t.i.tles--My lover"s souvenir and endearing words--How she caused Henry to leave me--My paroxysms of rage--Henry"s complete betrayal of me 273
CHAPTER LIV
FORCED TO DO PENANCE LIKE A TRAPPIST-MONK
"By the King"s orders"--I submit for the sake of my children--Must fast as well as pray--In delicate health, I insist upon returning to Dresden--Bernhardt, to avoid being maltreated by King, threatens him with his sword--The King"s awful wrath--Bernhardt prisoner in Nossen--I escape, temporarily, protracted _ennui_ 279
CHAPTER LV
FRANCIS JOSEPH JOINS MY SAXON ENEMIES
Cuts me dead before whole family--Everybody talks over my head at dinner--I refuse to attend more court festivities--Husband protests because I won"t stand for insult from Emperor--I give rein to my contempt for his family--Hypocrites, despoilers, gamblers, religious maniacs, brutes--Benign lords to the people, tyrants at home--I cry for my children like a she-dog whose young were drowned 285
CHAPTER LVI
I AM DETERMINED TO DO AS I PLEASE