"And you are mine. You and Septimus. I"ve seen hundreds of people since I"ve been away, and some seem to have cared for me--but there"s no one really in my life but you two."
Sypher thought: "And we both love you with all there is in us, and you don"t know it." He also thought jealously: "Who are the people that have cared for you?"
He said: "No one?"
A smile parted her lips as she looked him frankly in the eyes and repeated the negative. He breathed a sigh of relief, for he had remembered Rattenden"s prophecy of the big man whom she was seeking, of the love for the big man, the gorgeous tropical sunshine in which all the splendor in her could develop. She had not found him. From the depths of his man"s egotism he uttered a prayer of thanksgiving.
"Tell me," she said again.
"Do you remember my letter from Paris in the summer?"
"Yes. You had a great scheme for the armies of the world."
"That was the beginning," said he, and then he told her all the grotesque story to the end, from the episode of the blistered heel. He told her things that he had never told himself; things that startled him when he found them expressed in words.
"In Russia," said he, "every house has its sacred pictures, even the poorest peasant"s hut. They call them ikons. These," waving to the walls, "were my ikons. What do you think of them?"
For the first time Zora became aware of the furniture and decoration of the room. The cartoon, the advertis.e.m.e.nt proofs, the model of Edinburgh Castle, produced on her the same effect as the famous board in the garden at Fenton Court. Then, however, she could argue with him on the question of taste, and lay down laws as the arbiter of the elegancies of conduct. Now he viewed the sorry images with her own eyes, and he had gone through fire to attain this clearness of vision. What could be said? Zora the magnificent and self-reliant found not a word, though her heart was filled with pity.
She was brought face to face with a ridiculous soul-tragedy, remote from her poor little experience of life. It was no time to act the beneficent G.o.ddess. She became self-conscious, fearful to speak lest she might strike a wrong note of sympathy. She wanted to give the man so much, and she could give him so little.
"I"m dying to help you," she said, rather piteously. "But how can I?"
"Zora," he said huskily.
She glanced up at him and he held her eyes with his, and she saw how she could help him.
"No, don"t--don"t. I can"t bear it."
She rose and turned away. "Don"t let us change things. They were so sweet before. They were so strange--your wanting me as a sort of priestess--I used to laugh--but I loved it all the time."
"That"s why I said I"ve been a fool, Zora."
The bell of the telephone connected with his manager"s office rang jarringly. He seized the transmitter in anger.
"How dare you ring me up when I gave orders I was to be undisturbed? I don"t care who wants to see me. I"ll see n.o.body."
He threw down the transmitter. "I"m very sorry," he began. Then he stopped.
The commonplace summons from the outer world brought with dismaying suddenness to his mind the practical affairs of life. He was a ruined man.
The thought staggered him. How could he say to Zora Middlemist: "I am a beggar. I want to marry you"?
She came to him with both hands outstretched, her instinctive gesture when her heart went out, and used his Christian name for the first time.
"Clem, let us be friends--good friends--true, dear friends, but don"t spoil it all for me."
When a woman, infinitely desired, pleads like that with glorious eyes, and her fragrance and her dearness are within arm"s length, a man has but to catch her to him and silence her pleadings with a man"s strength, and carry her off in triumph. It has been the way of man with woman since the world began, and Sypher knew it by his man"s instinct. It was a temptation such as he had never dreamed was in the world. He pa.s.sed through a flaming, blazing torment of battle.
"Forget what I have said, Zora. We"ll be friends, if you so wish it."
He pressed her hands and turned away. Zora felt that she had gained an empty victory.
"I ought to be going," she said.
"Not yet. Let us sit down and talk like friends. It"s many weary months since I have seen you."
She remained a little longer and they talked quietly of many things. On bidding her good-by he said half playfully:
"I"ve often wondered why you have taken up with a fellow like me."
"I suppose it"s because you"re a big man," said Zora.
CHAPTER XX
Septimus walked back to his club after his dinner with Zora, blessing his stars for two reasons: first, because a gracious providence had restored him to favor in his G.o.ddess"s sight, and, secondly, because he had escaped without telling her of the sundered lives of Emmy and himself. By the time he went to bed, however, having pondered for some hours over the interdependent relations between Zora, Sypher, Emmy, and himself, he had entangled his mind into a condition of intricate complication. He longed to continue to sun himself in the presence of his divinity. But being a married man (no matter how nominally), too much sunning appeared reprehensible. He had also arranged for the sunning of Clem Sypher, and was aware of the indelicacy of two going through this delicious process at the same time. He also dreaded the possible incredulity of Zora when he should urge the ferociousness of his domestic demeanor as the reason for his living apart from his wife. The consequence was that after a sleepless night he bolted like a rabbit to his burrow at Nunsmere. At any rate, the mission of the dog"s tail was accomplished.
His bolt took place on Friday. On Sat.u.r.day morning he was awakened by Wiggleswick.
The latter"s attire was not that of the perfect valet. He wore an old, colored shirt open at the throat, a pair of trousers. .h.i.tched up to his shoulder blades by means of a pair of red braces, and a pair of dilapidated carpet slippers.
"Here"s a letter."
"Oh, post it," said Septimus sleepily.
"You haven"t written it. The missus has written it. It has a French stamp and the Paris postmark. You"d better read it."
He put it on his master"s pillow, and went to the window to admire the view. Septimus aroused, read the letter. It was from Emmy. It ran:
"DEAREST SEPTIMUS:
"I can"t stand this loneliness in Paris any longer. I can"t, I can"t. If you were here and I could see you even once a week, I shouldn"t mind. But to go on day after day indefinitely without a comforting word from you is more than I can bear. You say the flat is ready. I am coming over at once with baby and Madame Bolivard, who swears she will never leave me. How she is going to get on in London without a word of English, I don"t know.
I don"t mind if I meet Zora. Perhaps it will be better for you that I should. And I think it will be quite safe for me now. Don"t hate me and think me horrid and selfish, my dear Septimus, but I do want you. I do. I do. Thanks for the toy train. Baby enjoys the paint on the carriages so much; but Madame Bolivard says it isn"t good for him. Dear, if I thought you wouldn"t forgive me for being such a worry, I wouldn"t worry you.
"Your always grateful "EMMY."
Septimus lit the half-smoked pipe of the night before that lay on the coverlet, and becoming aware of Wiggleswick, disturbed his contemplation of nature by asking him if he had ever been married.
"What?" asked Wiggleswick in the unmodulated tone of the deaf.
"Have you ever been married, Wiggleswick?"
"Heaps of times," said the old man.
"Dear me," said Septimus. "Did you commit bigamy?"
"Bigamy? No. I buried "em all honorable."