Now where did those stupid fools leave the pitcher of iced juice? I don"t believe I"m going to have to pour a cup of it for myself."
The girl looked around vaguely for a tick, then seemed to remember that the pitcher she was searching for was in another room. She swept out with evident purpose, about to attempt something startlingly new, and her sister cast one last venomous look at the door the man had used before following her out. Possibly the second one was gathering her courage, and would make her own attempt if and when her sister was successful.
"By all the perfection of the twenty-sixth level," I breathed, wondering if I"d found the wrong apartment. Considering those two sisters I was certainly hoping it was the wrong apartment, but considering the way the rest of the day had gone it probably wasn"t. Two pretty little girls, not above thirty seasons in age, both with golden curls and lovely green eyes and yellow gowns and too many jewels. And the same face. Twin girl children so spoiled they would sweat rather than open a hanging and a window themselves, and these were the ones the G.o.d had sent me to protect?
I made a very soft sound of ridicule and disgust, then decided I had enough time to look around and be sure. I was remembering what the Administrator had said about their fate being entwined with the city"s, but I really did have to be certain. If there were other women in the Pavilion I might be able to forget about the girls, but somehow I had the feeling...
A feeling which, unfortunately, turned out to be right. The Guest Pavilion was a fairly large building, but all of the apartments for guests were on the second floor. There wasn"t another area being used by anyone at all, male or female, and the stairway meant to lead to the third floor servants" quarters was closed off with a heavy door that was barred and locked. I stood in the dimness of the hall and stared at that door, then heaved a sigh. The only thing I"d gotten from the sounds coming from the first floor was complete emptiness...
"A pox and taxes," I muttered in disgust, the harshest curse those of the city spat at one another. Those girls were the ones I had to protect all right, but I couldn"t for the life of me understand why. Of what use could they possibly be? I kept asking myself the question as I padded silently back to their apartment, but Diin-tha, if he was watching me, showed no inclination to visit me with enlightenment. I"d get my answer at the next gathering - if I kept the girls alive.
I didn"t quite sigh again as I slipped back into their rooms, but my skill at being silent was wasted with those two. I probably could have hummed a tune as I checked each of the rooms tobe certain they were empty except for the girls, and the sisters never would have noticed. They were busy matching slippers to the gowns they would wear on their trip home the next day, and couldn"t be bothered with paying attention to what went on around them.
Once I"d gone through the entire apartment, I locked the balcony doors I"d used to get in, then went to the small, almost bare anteroom that fronted the apartment. Callers were meant to wait in that small room rather than hang around the marble hallway, and anyone intending to enter the way people usually did had to come through the anteroom. With all the lamps darkened it was the best possible position for me to take, and not only because there was no other way in.
It also put a door between me and the sisters, which would save having to explain to them why I was there.
I knelt in the heavy darkness right in front of the door I"d been set to guard, slid free the dagger from the sheathe I"d strapped to my right thigh, then settled back on my heels as I lay the dagger on the floor beside me. I could feel ... something in the air as I curled my toes under my feet, but after a moment I was forced to admit it wasn"t the tingle of magic. It was less than magic and also more, a feeling I hated and yet also antic.i.p.ated with racing heart. I would need everything I had to hold that door against those who came, and that meant - The Learning. My eyes closed as I knelt there in the dark, feeling it all around me and slowly becoming a part of it. Most people feared the dark, feared what might be in it, a lesson they had learned from countless ghastly deaths and mutilations committed during the lightless time.
One part of the Learning was born of the dark, drew strength and nourishment from it, formed itself from the formlessness it sprang from. It was difficult for a human to come to terms with, painful in the extreme to learn, but once learned...
Once learned it could never be forgotten, never denied. The muscles in my shoulders and thighs relaxed, all tension soothed out of them, the peace of complete readiness settling down and taking over. It wasn"t possible to perform properly while tense and nervous, so the Learning disallowed those feelings. It readied one for what was soon to come, made one eager for the time when the rest of the Learning would be used - and made one forget what it had been like afterward, when the Learning had been used before. The loathing and horror, the silent demands to know what I"d been made into, what I"d become - In the grip of the Learning I no longer doubted my right to do what I"d done to living, breathing people.
I simply became someone who could do that, and also would. The feeling of enormous strength and uncounterable skill, of undeniable power over those about me... The feeling flowed through my body like a drug of superiority and victory, a drug I both wanted and needed. Nothing would get past me, nothing and no one, and regrets for what would be done had simply ceased to exist...
Time has no meaning for one in that state, for all thought ceased as though the changeling were a beast who knelt waiting ... waiting ... antic.i.p.ating nothing, prepared against all. The taste of the darkness was salty with heat, the smell of it empty, the sound of it ringing with distant heartbeats. The flesh beneath the unmoving hands of the beast was cool, as cool as the marble it knelt on. And then it was - Eyes opened quickly, eyes that glowed red without the need for outer light to cause the glow.
The edges of the darkness had been shattered some small distance away, and those came who would give their blood in sacrifice to Bellid. The G.o.d would laugh and drink deeply of their terror before their lives fled, and afterward - The beast felt the deep disturbance rocking the darkness elsewhere than in that place. Many of those who had stood about that dwelling were taking themselves elsewhere at great speed, fear in their hearts over what occurred in the distance, but those who came - Four followed with grim purpose, one led with an agony of fear gripping his bowels. "I pray the G.o.ds it won"t be too late," his voice whispered again and again. "I pray the G.o.ds it won"t be too late. We should have slit their throats as soon as they arrived here, not tempted the prophecy out of politically motivated respect for their father. I pray - "The heavy thud of boots rang on the marble of the hall just outside, and then the outer door was thrown open. Lamps were carried by two of those who came, but lamplight had not the ability to pierce the darkness where the beast knelt. Only her eyes of glowing red were they able to see, and the sight halted them with gasps and twitchings.
"What - what in the name of blessed Arakon is that?" one of them hissed, peering forward and yet fearing what would be seen. "Did you set a guard-animal at their door, sir?"
"No, you fool, where would I get a guard-animal?" the one addressed answered in a matching hiss, fluttering his hands. "Get it away from there, and then go in and do your duty."
"None may pa.s.s," the beast breathed as the first of the five grasped his weapon and prepared to step forward. The words, soft as darkness, reached for the men and wrapped them in their sound and meaning, and all five shuddered from the touch of a corner of frigid chaos.
"No - no, we must get past it!" the leader spoke again, for the most part attempting to deny his terror. "If those girls live our city is lost! All together, everyone at the same time!"
Brave men, they were, those other four, but the Learning was not to be denied. Even as the beast flowed to her feet, the dagger held easily in her right hand, the lamps the men held flickered and died. Shouts came, filled with fear and desperation, and then the beast was among them, unseen and nearly unfelt. Two went down quickly with their throats slit, a third screamed when his flailing sword failed to protect him from beneath, and the fourth had not repaired the weak place in his leather where it covered his side. He screamed like the one before him, but also carried the dagger down, well-lodged in his ribs.
So quickly had so much death been committed, that the fifth, the one who led the others, had only just begun a whimpering run for his life. He had stumbled back and was attempting to turn and find the door when the beast reached him. No longer had the beast the use of her dagger, but with this one, soft and unencased in leather, she had no need of it. One kick took the feet out from under him and then she was down and upon him, tearing at his soft, helpless flesh with the only weapon remaining to her. His were the last of the screams to be heard, and when they had ceased the beast rose to her feet, visited the other bodies for a time before going to free her blade from the unmoving form which held it, then she returned to her place at the door.
Uncounted time pa.s.sed once again, and then the beast felt others entering the dwelling. The disturbances of the distance had come closer and closer, much of it flowing nearly to the dwelling, but as the disturbance had not entered it had not concerned the beast. Now there were those who had entered, and should they attempt to pa.s.s they would join those who littered the floor.
Lamplight bounced as those who carried it hurried up the marble hall, breath hissing in the throats of the hurrying ones as they pressed on in haste. One of their number muttered as he went, but the words seemed more curse than prayer.
"It wasn"t our fault!" one of the others whispered as they neared the room of the beast, apparently speaking in answer to he who muttered. "We couldn"t avoid that fight with those city guardsmen, so it isn"t our fault that we were delayed getting here. Once most of our troops were in the city - "
"Save it to tell to Garam and Fearin if anything happened to those females they want." The words from the one who had muttered were now clear, but no happier than they had been. "We were supposed to be here to help that girl slave, but we didn"t make it. If anyone got to the females - "
His words broke off as his hurrying pace faltered, all of them slowing to a stop as the lamplight fell on what lay inside the doorway they had just entered. They took another step or two, looking down rather than up, and then one of their number drew in his breath sharply. He had seen the red eyes of the beast, and then all of them saw the same.
"Is - that - " the first one to speak began, but the following words refused to come. He swallowed instead, the spittle going down hard, and the second shook his head.
"I don"t know," the second whispered, his voice trembling unnoticed. "But we really shouldlook inside - "
"None may pa.s.s," the beast breathed, smiling into the darkness at the thought of more blood to be spilled, and these men, like the first, shuddered at the sound.
"Two of you find Fearin," the second man ordered, decision hard in his voice as he backed one of the steps he had taken. "I don"t care what it takes to do it, just find him and bring him back.
As fast as the G.o.ds allow."
"Or faster," one of the others muttered as two from the back left running, they having seized the opportunity before any others could. "Do you think Garam - "
"No," the second said flatly, ending the suggestion, and then there was no other thing save waiting.
Time ... time ... and then the beast felt newcomers approach, two hesitant, one anxious, all hurrying. Those who remained were not aware of the newcomers" presence until the three had nearly reached the room, and then relief flowed out of them as the cold fear had done.
"High Master, thank the G.o.ds you"re here," the second man began, nearly sobbing in his joy.
"We can"t even see what"s over there, but just look what it did - "
"That"s enough," the anxious one"s voice lashed out, a raggedness there for those who could hear it. "Take your men and wait in the hall."
"With the greatest of pleasure," the man said at once, and very quickly the anxious one was left with the beast and the dead. The outer door was closed behind the last to depart, and then the newcomer stirred where he stood.
"Aelana, it"s Fearin," he said to the beast, the trembling of his voice clearer now. "The city is ours so you don"t need to guard that door any longer. You can come away - "
"None may pa.s.s," the beast breathed for the third time, a heartbeat away from rising, and the man immediately halted the slow advance he had not been truly aware of. The light of the single lamp left for him showed a haggardness in his bearded face, and then he shook his head.
"By the Power and the Will, I wouldn"t have believed it beyond me," he muttered, and then he raised his arms and called softly, "Diin-tha, hear your servant. I cannot reach through to the girl and I must. I beseech your aid, Lord, in severing the tie binding her in that - that - "
The words failed him then, but they were unnecessary. The red eyes gazing at him flickered and then faded, and then I was out of the peace imposed on me by the Learning, blinking at the lamplight and taking the first deep breath I had in hours. I raised my hands to my face to rub at my eyes, and as I did I heard Fearin moving forward.
"Aelana, can you understand me now?" he asked, bending to put a hand to my shoulder. "Are you all right? Is any of that blood yours?"
"Of course I can understand you," I began to answer in annoyance, wondering why he sounded so strange, and then I took my hands from my eyes and was able to look down at myself in the lamplight that now reached me.
Blood. Covering me almost everywhere, from the bodies of those I"d killed. Those I"d enjoyed killing. Especially the last ... his throat torn out ... with my teeth - I looked up at Fearin"s shadowy face, remembering it all, then pulled away from his hand, ran to a corner of the room, and threw up everything inside me.
Chapter 7.
It wasn"t far from noon the next day, but you couldn"t tell it by looking at the skies. Rain poured down in a solid sheet, cooling the air and everything it touched, but also soaking the world. I sat on the wide ledge of the open porch-room of the Chief Administrator"s palace, my arms around my knees, my back against a pillar, my eyes on the rain, remembering the rest of the night before even though I didn"t want to. I"d had a number of hours of sleep, but that wasn"t helping me with any of the memories."This has certainly been a night of surprises," Fearin had said once my heaving had stopped, crouching down next to me where I sat with my back against a wall. "Here, rinse your mouth out with this water, and then we"ll use the rest of it to clean you up a little."
He"d pressed a cup into my shaking hands, and I hadn"t even been able to ask him where he"d gotten the cup and water. The water was cold enough to wash the horrible taste out of my mouth and soothe my burning throat, and all I"d been able to consider was being grateful that the cup and water were here to be used.
"I think I"m beginning to understand more of what being Shadowborn means," Fearin had commented after taking the cup back, his eyes narrowed as he looked down at me. "And I"m learning that you"re not quite the strutting, boasting, dangerous Kenoss you want people to think you are. You"re dangerous, all right, but there"s a good deal more to you than that."
"Yes, I also do finger tricks with lamp shadows on walls," I"d answered tiredly, closing my eyes as I put my head back again. "Now that my secret is out, I"ll be in demand for parties all over the city."
"This ... whatever it was has to be what you wanted me to warn the others about," he"d said, ignoring my comment completely. "Can you tell me what happened? Four of them were guardsmen and the fifth... He must have died last. They were all larger than you, four of them much larger and armed as well as armored ... All you had was that dagger... Aelana, how were you able to kill them all?"
"The Learning makes it easy," I"d said, keeping my eyes closed. "But what difference does it make? Our Guardian wanted something done and it was done. He knew I"d have to use the Learning, I"m not far enough back to decent physical condition to handle fighting without it, but that"s why he chose me. Because I can use the Learning. And it could have been a lot worse."
"I"ll see myself in the widest circle of chaos before I ask how it could be worse," he"d muttered, sounding as though he"d never seen dead bodies before. Well, maybe he"d never seen dead bodies in the condition of the ones I"d created. Taking the fifth without a separate weapon had triggered the rest of the reaction, the one I couldn"t let myself think about, the one I was never conscious of doing at the time. It had left them all ... more than simply dead... And had gotten all that blood on me - "No, no, just calm down," Fearin had said quickly, putting a hand to my forehead as I fought to keep from being sick again. "It"s all over and done with now, and as soon as the rest of the city is secured we"ll go to the palace and find you a place to sleep. I intend to use the palace as my headquarters until we march again, so we"ll all have a chance to rest up. And as soon as we bring Lokkel and the rest into the city I"ll have him mix up something to ease your insides."
"Unless it was poison you had in mind, don"t bother," I"d said, pushing his hand away from my head as I"d started to get myself together again. "I"ll get over this alone just the way I always have, and you can just mark the reaction up to female squeamishness."
"Squeamishness?" he"d repeated in outrage, glaring at me with quite a bit of heat. "I have men out in that hall who just went through the fighting to take a city, and I happen to know they had to hack their way through crowds to get here. Would you like to know how many of them emptied their insides even worse than you did, and all from looking at those bodies and thinking about having to get past the door you were guarding? What it"s like to remember doing all that - "
His face worked briefly as he tried to find more words, then he simply shook his head.
"I"ve also discovered I"m not as hard and unreachable as I thought. Hold still and let me take care of this, and then we can both get out of here."
"This" was trying to rub my face off with a wet piece of cloth he"d produced, and I hadn"t been able to force him away from me until he was satisfied with the job he"d done. I"d been furious that he would treat me like a grimy little child, but the man of Power couldn"t have cared less.
He"d hauled me to my feet and pulled me out into the hall, and once he"d seen about a.s.signing guards for my former post we"d gone down to the lower floor of the Pavilion. I"d been aching toomuch outside and in to give him the argument I should have, and had even fallen asleep in a corner until we"d been able to go to the Chief Administrator"s palace...
"Well, good morning," a pleasant voice came, sounding as though the words were really meant.
"We"re almost out of morning, I know, but despite the rain it"s been too good a morning not to acknowledge it. I hear your part of the attack went just as smoothly as ours."
The fighter Talasin walked to the other end of the railing ledge I sat on and leaned against the pillar there, his green eyes looking at me with a smile in them. He wore leather armor over his tunic and muddy boots on his feet, and the heavy sword at his side said he"d probably been out with his troops. The fact that he wasn"t soaked through said he"d probably worn a cloak and a helmet, and the chicken leg in his hand said he"d been too busy to stop for a meal. All those deductions made me feel positively brilliant, but didn"t do a thing to lighten my mood.
"I saw Fearin very briefly earlier, and he mentioned you held your position without any trouble at all," Talasin went on, in between bites of his chicken. "Since yours was the critical position in all this, I"m very glad I was the one who pulled you out of the stream. Now I can say our complete success was due to me."
His grin was wide and teasing, part of the expansive good humor he was trying to share, but he was really wasting his time. I was already deep into the humor of pouring, drenching rain, and wasn"t likely to be pulled out of it.
"You know, if that"s the best anyone could do with finding you something to wear, I don"t blame you for feeling depressed," he said after another handful of heartbeats, now frowning at the tunic I had on. "You look like you"re swimming in that thing, and the color... Faded violet is the closest I can come. The least you"ve earned is a decent tunic and a pair of sandals, and as soon as Fearin gets here I"ll let him know it. Meanwhile, why don"t you have something to eat with me?"
"Thanks anyway, but I"m not hungry," I said, deciding to see if answering him would get him to leave me alone again. It was nice of him to be so concerned, but the tunic I wore was something I"d found, and it suited my mood better than what Fearin had provided. The night before I"d all but scrubbed myself with a brush to get the blood off, but it still clung red and splashed all over my memory. I"d spilled blood before and I would again, but that particular way... Talasin obviously didn"t know, but once he did his concern would be long gone.
"None of that food on the table over there was touched before I came in," he said now, still studying me with those green eyes. "If you"ve already eaten, what was it and where did you eat? Fearin said you had a hard time last night, and would probably need looking after today.
My guess would be that he"s right as usual."
"Fearin"s worse than an old woman!" I snapped, unfolding from the ledge before sliding off it to the floor. "I didn"t have a hard time last night I had an easy time, just as easy as it"s always been. And since that"s what I"m here for, he"d better get used to it. When is this meeting that"s been called supposed to happen? I"m tired of sitting around here doing nothing."
"The meeting will happen when everyone gets here," Talasin answered from behind me, his tone overly neutral. "Since it"s still early, they probably aren"t hurrying. I know Fearin provided that food because it"s still fresh and either hot or cold, whichever it"s supposed to be.
Why don"t we - "
I made a sound of annoyance and stalked across the porch away from him, struggling to keep my temper from flying apart. The porch was really a very large outer room at the back of the palace, open to the air on three sides and furnished with expensive floor weavings and well-padded furniture. Its roof kept the sun off anyone using it, and overhangs kept the rain from spraying in and ruining its comfort. About fifty feet below the wall I stood in front of was a small, private courtyard, and if I concentrated on the room and the courtyard I just might be able to stay out of a fight.
"Why do you have to be so disagreeable all the time?" Talasin demanded from the other side of the porch, annoyance now strong in his voice. "You act as if you don"t want anyone treatingyou decently, as if someone bothering themselves about you is offensive. Why can"t you be reasonable for once - "
"Because she"s female, and females are never reasonable," another voice interrupted, one that was as satisfied as Talasin"s had been earlier. Garam had obviously arrived, and wasn"t that nice.
"Some females are reasonable," Talasin countered, still sounding sour. "I know because I"ve met them. How did it go for you and your group yesterday, Garam?"
"These fools were so easy it was almost a shame to take advantage of them," the other fighter answered happily, clattering things on the food table. "They were fat and sa.s.sy from never having lost a fight, but the panic set in real fast when they couldn"t bring the rest of their forces past the barriers Fearin set up at those cardinal points. By the time they got their fighters to the wall you were already inside, and the other half of their force was captured or dead. All in all I only lost two of my men once the attack started. Almost losing the girl there earlier in the day doesn"t count at all."
"You almost lost Aelana?" Talasin demanded, too busy watching Garam helping himself at the food table to notice that I"d turned to look at the two of them. "How in the name of chaos did that happen?"
"Some fool of a barbarian thought I was being too hard on her and tried to buy her from me,"
Garam answered, turning away from the table with a filled plate and a grin. "If I could have thought of a way to convince our Guardian that refusing a silver piece is a sin, I would have let the fool have her."
"But you couldn"t so you didn"t," Talasin summed up, pointedly not sharing Garam"s amus.e.m.e.nt. "Not to mention the fact that the fool was wrong and you weren"t being too hard on her. Or were you?"
"As a matter of fact - I was," Garam said without the grin, looking at me rather than at Talasin. I was so shocked I almost fell over dead, and seeing that brought a faint smile back to the fighter. "Not that I really understood that at the time. It"s been my experience that women have no business mixing in men"s affairs, that if you"re silly enough to give them responsibility and depend on them to do a job, all you"ll get for your trouble is a hole in your lines and excuses about why it"s there. And females who were also slaves... All they can do is whine and wheedle."
"But you seem to have changed your mind," Talasin said, tossing away the chicken bone he"d stripped. "Does that mean you heard what Aelana accomplished last night?"
"It means a little more than that," Garam answered, still not avoiding my eyes. "I made it as hard on her as I could yesterday, waiting for her to start complaining or crying about how unfair I was, but it didn"t happen. She took it all just the way I would expect one of my men to take it, and then I really hurt her. It was an accident, we both knew that, but it doesn"t change the fact that I really hurt her. Not only didn"t she fold, she didn"t even waste time blaming me. And after that she did exactly what she was supposed to. It seems I owe our Guardian an apology."
"I like the way you put that," Talasin said with a snort of amus.e.m.e.nt, pa.s.sing Garam to get closer to the table. "You ride the girl from the first tick she joins us, and it"s our Guardian you owe an apology? I"ll have to tell that one to Fearin. When I saw him this morning he looked like he could use a good laugh."
"I noticed that myself," Garam said, finally looking away from me. I used the opportunity to walk to a chair and sit in it, refusing to think about what Garam had said. If he"d made any sense at all I"d figure it out some other time.
"He may be worried about this rain delaying us," Talasin said, busy with filling a plate of his own. "The only thing it"s really doing is keeping the city from going up in flames while our men finish the intaking. Another couple of days and we"ll be ready to move on."
"With our two special prizes," Garam said, and suddenly he was sitting down in a chair not far from me, his dark eyes inspecting me again. "I hear there were five men trying to keep us fromtotal victory, but they didn"t live long enough to make it. I also heard that Fearin had to be called before our people could get through, but our prizes were completely safe. Just the way they were supposed to be."
"There were five?" Talasin said, coming over with his plate. "I hadn"t heard the exact number, and that"s what Fearin must have meant about her not having it easy. He thinks she"ll need looking after today, but she isn"t having any. That"s what we were arguing about when you came in."
"No soldier likes to be coddled like a baby," Garam said around a mouthful of food, his eyes still on me in that very strange way. "If she doesn"t want what you"re trying to push at her, she probably doesn"t need it."
"If Fearin thinks she needs it, then her opinion doesn"t count," Talasin said, sounding annoyed even through the food in his mouth. "She insists he"s being an old woman, but that"s not a description of the Fearin I know. If we let it go and something happens to her, our Guardian won"t be too happy with us."
"No, he won"t," Garam said with a frown, and suddenly I could see that he"d switched sides. "It might be a good idea having Lokkel look at her. If there"s something wrong with her besides that bruise on her face, he ought to be able to take care of it with a spell."
"There"s a limit to what even my spells can do, Prince Garam," another voice came, and then Lokkel himself was coming over to join us. "Fearin had me do a Seeking while she slept this morning, and there"s nothing wrong with her that magic can cure."
"Then there"s nothing to worry about," Garam said with renewed satisfaction, happily switching back. "Leave her alone and she"ll be just fine."
"How can she be fine if she starves to death?" Talasin demanded, interrupting Lokkel without knowing it. "Has she been back from slavery for seasons and seasons that she can afford to stop eating any time she likes? Missing a couple of meals would mean nothing to you and me, but for her it"s way too soon. And I"ll bet she didn"t even eat much yesterday, when you were in charge of her."
Talasin"s last comment kept Garam from immediately laughing off everything the other fighter had said; Garam knew he hadn"t fed me anything the day before, and had no idea what I"d eaten before or afterwards. I brought my feet up to the left in the chair I sat in and put both hands to my eyes and rubbed, trying to decide whether to laugh or scream. In all my life I"d never been in so unbelievable a position and then, of course, things grew even more complicated.
"Ah, good, everyone"s already here," Fearin"s voice came, and then he was striding out onto the porch to join us. The night before he"d been wearing all leather and a sword, but now he was back to cloth trousers, a shirt, and a blue robe. The robe flared out behind him as he walked, as though trying to keep up with a man in too much of a hurry.
"Ranander is bringing in the girls, so you"d better brace yourselves," Fearin went on. "I want all of you to see them, otherwise I would have spared you the experience. You"ll find that taking the city was easier. Prince Talasin, you"ll have to speak to your men. Let them know that the girls are strictly off-limits, even if they should happen to be invited. If any of them do try something I"ll know about it, and then I"ll take care of the matter. Any questions?"