Jiang Xiaoning sighed faintly and kissed Han Jia"s ear before he spoke softly. "I know, you didn"t like it before. But I want to be gentle…"
Han Jia smiled lightly, "When did you pay attention to that? Yesterday—" he deliberately dragged his voice and said enticingly, "Wasn"t it good?"
Jiang Xiaoning felt that he should be ashamed of the words he said, but in fact, Han Jia"s voice was extremely soft and had a hoa.r.s.e s.e.xiness to it, which excited him even more.
"Behave, I will leave tomorrow." He controlled his desire and muttered as he sucked the skin on the side of Han Jia"s neck, trying to make a few hickeys there while slipping his hand towards Han Jia"s waist—gently caressing the soft and warm skin.
Han Jia moved a few times, thinking about something while seemingly giving up the insisted position and docilely relaxing under him.
As Jiang Xiaoning"s palm caressed his back, he felt that the sensation was slightly different from what he remembered. "I wanted to say it yesterday… you are thin." He rubbed on his cheek affectionately as his fingers wandered, pa.s.sing over his ribs, and then a slightly rough touch led him to find the first scar.
"It"s still here," Jiang Xiaoning said sighingly, his fingers moved along the scar all the way to the left side of it.
Five years ago, he had measured the same scar countless times. In the past five years, he had slowly and gently worshipped Han Jia"s wounded past in his dreams and imaginations.
Han Jia shivered a little as an unbearable moan escaped his mouth.
Although it was a bit late, Jiang Xiaoning had already felt a strange smooth skin even before he was tempted by him.
His kiss stopped, and the caresses stopped—he even felt that his own heartbeat stopped.
He straightened his body, and this time he didn"t leave an ounce of pa.s.sion at all as one of his hand stopped Han Jia"s resistance and the other hand lifted up his shirt.
Under the light, looking at Han Jia"s back—where the lungs were positioned—there was a distorted scar in the center and another inconspicuous mark.
Han Jia wanted to move, but Jiang Xiaoning held him down while his voice shook. "Let me see."
"What"s so good about it?" Han Jia smiled effortlessly, "Aren"t you afraid to lose your appet.i.te?"
This kind of avoidance was no longer possible to divert Jiang Xiaoning"s attention. He gently touched the scar and took a few deep breaths: "Who did it?"
Han Jia laughed: "Don"t you know already?"
"You know what I am talking about," Jiang Xiaoning could perceive that his voice was slowly becoming irritable, but he could not control himself. "Who shot at you?"
"What shot? That"s just—"
"Don"t lie!" Jiang Xiaoning interrupted him, and even the anger in his own voice scared him. He paused and calmed down his tone. "Don"t keep me in the dark again, Han Jia, I can clearly distinguish a gunshot wound from other wounds."
"Then you have truly matured." Han Jia went quiet for a while before he smiled softly, "But, no matter what wound, what does it have to do with you?"
"Han Jia…"
"Aren"t you leaving tomorrow? Don"t you want to come one last time?" Han Jia asked, even his tone was of laziness. "Do you still want to or not?"
Jiang Xiaoning grabbed his shoulder, turned him over and looked directly at his eyes under the light.
Han Jia did not evade—it seemed that he did not see his anxiety and heartache at all. He narrowed his eyes slightly, and even though he was lying underneath Jiang Xiaoning, his expression was aloof and remote. "Jiang Xiaoning, I said that I started a new life. What the people in the past are doing and what the past events have become, I don"t care about them—that includes these wounds and you." He laughed again, "If you want to do it then do it, but if you don"t then get off my body. I have a cla.s.s tomorrow."
Those words caused Jiang Xiaoning to clench his teeth tightly as he looked at him. He did not know what method to use in order to wipe the teasing smile on his face.
The two looked at each other, one bit his teeth and the other was calm while the atmosphere in the room was incomparably grave.
A knock on the door broke this atmosphere.
"Han Jia, Han Jia!" Liu Dezhu"s voice sounded in between the interval of the knocks.
With that, Han Jia and Jiang Xiaoning quickly separated. Han Jia tidied his clothes as he walked towards the door and responded at the same time.
Simultaneously, Jiang Xiaoning fixed the bed and himself, then he went to the main door of the house and listened to their discussion.
Liu Dezhu"s voice was packed with excitement but owing to the fact that he was speaking in a local dialect, the fast speed made it impossible for Jiang Xiaoning to discern what he was talking about.
He only heard Han Jia replied softly: "I know, you have to be careful, I will wait for you."
He watched Han Jia send off Liu Dezhu, watched as Han Jia locked the door, and watched Han Jia slowly come back.
When Han Jia pa.s.sed by him, he stopped: "He has something to do tonight and don"t want to disturb Grandma Liu in the middle of the night, so he wants to stay here. It"s fine for us three to squeeze in together, right?"
Jiang Xiaoning did not speak, Han Jia leaned close to him and let his breath linger on his face: "If you want to do it then hurry up."
Hearing that, Jiang Xiaoning pushed Han Jia a bit causing him to retreat two steps and hit the door frame.
"You"re the one who doesn"t want to do it," Han Jia smiled, turned around, and took a few steps into the inner room.
Jiang Xiaoning"s heart was on fire as he walked into the yard; the cool breeze blew by, making him feel much calmer.
Han Jia had actually refused to pay attention to him. Even though Han Jia did not want him five years ago, if he ran out, Han Jia would always chase him back; if he shoved Han Jia, Han Jia would just apologize to him. In the past five years, he had been immersed in the thoughts and the good times of the past, but Han Jia had truly walked away.
He lowered his head and felt stabs of pain in his heart. He knew that he had just used force to ask Han Jia to make love with him. This kind of method was really cowardice. But what was even more cowardice was that he had actually used the idea that he would never appear again to appeal for warmth.
However, even that half-hearted warmth was interrupted. The man who had been very close to Han Jia appeared, and Han Jia responded with gentleness.
That kind of gentleness was once his.
Jiang Xiaoning looked up; the night sky here was cleaner and clearer than in the city—the starlight glimmered brilliantly.
There had to be a lot of things here that the city did not have, and those things had kept Han Jia.
This was what Jiang Xiaoning was most worried about. It was not that he never thought about it before; humans always seek complementarity. Life was like that and so was love: the rich young lady who was well protected tends to fall in love with the prodigal son, and the wandering prodigal son always longed for a good wife and loving mother to make him turn his head. He had been worried that Han Jia would find a dull, loyal, and honest person to mend his heart… a quiet place, a suitable man, what could he use to win over Han Jia?
So, should I really give up? He turned his head around and saw Han Jia sitting behind the window gla.s.s. His head was slightly lowered as he looked through the teaching material with a frown as if he had encountered a difficult question.
Jiang Xiaoning looked at his wrinkled brows and felt his own heart had broken into pieces.
He walked in, not daring to look at Han Jia again before he started to grab the bedding and Yu Xiujun"s laptop.
"I"m going to stay in the car," he whispered with his back to Han Jia as he dragged his luggage out with one hand.
Han Jia did not stop him. Han Jia did not make a sound… not even a sound of him turning to look at him existed.
Jiang Xiaoning walked out of the courtyard with disappointment. The road was not flat, so as he took heavy steps towards where the car was parked, he nearly fell several times from being absent-minded.
When he finally arrived in the car, he put Yu Xiujun"s notebook in the front seat, then opened the rear door and threw the bedding and himself in simultaneously.
After sitting for a long while, he took out his cell phone.
"What happened?" The voice of the person on the other side was very suspicious.
"Xin Shixiong,1 this time I will personally watch Yu Xiujun go back."
The person went silent for a moment, "Didn"t you say that…" When Jiang Xiaoning did not say anything that person sighed, "It"s also good if you return, there are still things for you to handle."
Jiang Xiaoning "en"2-ed and hung up the call. Then he put away his phone, rolled down his window, and looked at the night sky outside.
The night sky was absolutely beautiful, but it did not belong to him.
Going back is also good. The city also had sparkling things, lights, girls" accessories, guns…
There were also those targets, purposely flickering those deceptive eyes.
Translator"s Note:
1 Shīxiōng 师兄 – senior male fellow student or apprentice; will be kept in the Chinese form
2 En 嗯 – interjection indicating approval, appreciation or agreement