""If you don"t call "im off, ses Mr. Bunnett, trembling all over, "I"ll have you locked up."
""I am a-calling "im off," ses Bob, looking very puzzled. "Didn"t you "ear me? It"s you making that noise that excites "im, I think. P"r"aps if you keep quiet he"ll leave go. Come off, Joseph, old boy, there"s a good doggie. That ain"t a bone."
""It"s no good talking to "im like that," ses Mr. Bunnett, keeping quiet but trembling worse than ever. "Make him let go."
""I don"t want to "urt his feelings," ses Bob; "they"ve got their feelings the same as wot we "ave. Besides, p"r"aps it ain"t "is fault-- p"r"aps he"s gone mad."
""HELP!" ses the old gen"leman, in a voice that might ha" been heard a mile away. "HELP!"
""Why don"t you keep quiet?" ses Bob. "You"re on"y frightening the pore animal and making things worse. Joseph, leave go and I"ll see whether there"s a biskit in my pocket. Why don"t you leave go?"
""Pull him off. Hit "im," ses Mr. Bunnett, shouting.
""Wot?" ses Bob Pretty, with a start. "Hit a poor, dumb animal wot don"t know no better! Why, you"d never forgive me, sir, and I should lose the gold watch besides."
""No, you won"t," ses Mr. Bunnett, speaking very fast. "You"ll "ave as much chance of it as ever you had. Hit "im! Quick!"
""It "ud break my "art," ses Bob. "He"d never forgive me; but if you"ll take the responserbility, and then go straight "ome and give me the gold watch now for kindness to animals, I will."
"He shook his "ead with sorrow and made that sucking noise agin."
""All right, you shall "ave it," ses Mr. Bunnett, shouting. "You shall "ave it."
""For kindness to animals?" ses Bob. "Honour bright?"
""Yes," ses Mr. Bunnett.
[Ill.u.s.tration:"Bob Pretty lifted "is foot and caught Joseph one behind that surprised "im."]
"Bob Pretty lifted "is foot and caught Joseph one behind that surprised "im. Then he "elped Mr. Bunnett look at "is leg, and arter pointing out that the skin wasn"t hardly broken, and saying that Joseph "ad got the best mouth of any dog in Claybury, "e walked "ome with the old gen"leman and got the watch. He said Mr. Bunnett made a little speech when "e gave it to "im wot he couldn"t remember, and wot he wouldn"t repeat if "e could.
"He came up to this "ere Cauliflower public-"ouse the same night for the money "e had won, and Bill Chambers made another speech, but, as Smith the landlord put" in outside for it, it didn"t do Bob Pretty the good it ought to ha" done."
THE BEQUEST
R. Robert Clarkson sat by his fire, smoking thoughtfully. His lifelong neighbour and successful rival in love had pa.s.sed away a few days before, and Mr. Clarkson, fresh from the obsequies, sat musing on the fragility of man and the inconvenience that sometimes attended his departure.
His meditations were disturbed by a low knocking on the front door, which opened on to the street. In response to his invitation it opened slowly, and a small middle-aged man of doleful aspect entered softly and closed it behind him.
"Evening, Bob," he said, in stricken accents. "I thought I"d just step round to see how you was bearing up. Fancy pore old Phipps! Why, I"d a"most as soon it had been me. A"most."
Mr. Clarkson nodded.
"Here to-day and gone to-morrow," continued Mr. Smithson, taking a seat.
"Well, well! So you"ll have her at last-pore thing."
"That was his wish," said Mr. Clarkson, in a dull voice.
"And very generous of him too," said Mr. Smithson. "Everybody is saying so. Certainly he couldn"t take her away with him. How long is it since you was both of you courting her?"
"Thirty years come June," replied the other.
"Shows what waiting does, and patience," commented Mr. Smithson. "If you"d been like some chaps and gone abroad, where would you have been now? Where would have been the reward of your faithful heart?"
Mr. Clarkson, whose pipe had gone out, took a coal from the fire and lit it again.
"I can"t understand him dying at his age," he said, darkly. "He ought to have lived to ninety if he"d been taken care of."
"Well, he"s gone, pore chap," said his friend. "What a blessing it must ha" been to him in his last moments to think that he had made provision for his wife."
"Provision!" exclaimed Mr. Clarkson. "Why he"s left her nothing but the furniture and fifty pounds insurance money--nothing in the world."
Mr. Smithson fidgeted. "I mean you," he said, staring.
"Oh!" said the other. "Oh, yes--yes, of course."
"And he doesn"t want you to eat your heart out in waiting," said Mr.
Smithson. ""Never mind about me," he said to her; "you go and make Bob happy." Wonderful pretty girl she used to be, didn"t she?" Mr. Clarkson a.s.sented.
"And I"ve no doubt she looks the same to you as ever she did," pursued the sentimental Mr. Smithson. "That"s the extraordinary part of it."
Mr. Clarkson turned and eyed him; removed the pipe from his mouth, and, after hesitating a moment, replaced it with a jerk.
"She says she"d rather be faithful to his memory," continued the persevering Mr. Smithson, "but his wishes are her law. She said so to my missis only yesterday."
"Still, she ought to be considered," said Mr. Clarkson, shaking his head.
"I think that somebody ought to put it to her. She has got her feelings, poor thing, and, if she would rather not marry again, she oughtn"t to be compelled to."
"Just what my missis did say to her," said the other; "but she didn"t pay much attention. She said it was Henry"s wish and she didn"t care what happened to her now he"s gone. Besides, if you come to think of it, what else is she to do? Don"t you worry, Bob; you won"t lose her again."
Mr. Clarkson, staring at the fire, mused darkly. For thirty years he had played the congenial part of the disappointed admirer but faithful friend. He had intended to play it for at least fifty or sixty. He wished that he had had the strength of mind to refuse the bequest when the late Mr. Phipps first mentioned it, or taken a firmer line over the congratulations of his friends. As it was, Little Molton quite understood that after thirty years" waiting the faithful heart was to be rewarded at last. Public opinion seemed to be that the late Mr. Phipps had behaved with extraordinary generosity.
"It"s rather late in life for me to begin," said Mr. Clarkson at last.
"Better late than never," said the cheerful Mr. Smithson.
"And something seems to tell me that I ain"t long for this world,"
continued Mr. Clarkson, eyeing him with some disfavour.
"Stuff and nonsense," said Mr. Smithson. "You"ll lose all them ideas as soon as you"re married. You"ll have somebody to look after you and help you spend your money."
Mr. Clarkson emitted a dismal groan, and clapping his hand over his mouth strove to make it pa.s.s muster as a yawn. It was evident that the malicious Mr. Smithson was deriving considerable pleasure from his discomfiture--the pleasure natural to the father of seven over the troubles of a comfortable bachelor. Mr. Clarkson, anxious to share his troubles with somebody, came to a sudden and malicious determination to share them with Mr. Smithson.