Yet it was not reason to fling my last guinea into the sea. A flash of petulance is well enough and may become beauty as summer lightning decks the sky, but fury is for termagants, and nought but fury could fling my last guinea to the waves. The offence, if offence there were, was too small for so monstrous an outburst. Well, if she would quarrel, I was ready; I had no patience with such tricks; they weary a man of sense; women serve their turn ill by using them. Also I had done her some small service. I would die sooner than call it to her mind, but it would have been a grace in her to remember it.
The afternoon came, grew to its height, and waned as I lay, back to sea and face to cliff, thinking now of all that had pa.s.sed, now of what was before me, sparing a moment"s fitful sorrow for the poor wretch who lay dead there by the cottage door, but returning always in resentful mood to my lost guinea and Barbara"s sore lack of courtesy. If she needed me, I was ready; but heaven forbid that I should face fresh rebuffs by seeking her! I would do my duty to her and redeem my pledge. More could not now be looked for, nay, by no possibility could be welcome; to keep away from her was to please her best. It was well, for in that her mind jumped with mine. In two hours now we could set out for Dover.
"Simon, I"m hungry."
The voice came from behind my shoulder, a yard or two away, a voice very meek and piteous, eloquent of an exhaustion and a weakness so great that, had they been real, she must have fallen by me, not stood upright on her feet. Against such stratagems I would be iron. I paid no heed, but lay like a log.
"Simon, I"m very thirsty too."
Slowly I gathered myself up and, standing, bowed.
"There"s a fragment of the pasty," said I; "but the jug is empty."
I did not look in her face and I knew she did not look in mine.
"I can"t eat without drinking," she murmured.
"I have nothing with which to buy liquor, and there"s nowhere to buy it."
"But water, Simon? Ah, but I mustn"t trouble you."
"I"ll go to the cottage and seek some."
"But that"s dangerous."
"You shall come to no hurt."
"But you?"
"Indeed I need a draught for myself. I should have gone after one in any case."
There was a pause, then Barbara said:
"I don"t want it. My thirst has pa.s.sed away."
"Will you take the pasty?"
"No, my hunger is gone too."
I bowed again. We stood in silence for a moment.
"I"ll walk a little," said Barbara.
"At your pleasure," said I. "But pray don"t go far, there may be danger."
She turned away and retraced her steps to the beach. The instant she was gone, I sprang up, seized the jug, and ran at the best of my speed to the cottage. Jonah Wall lay still across the entrance, no living creature was in sight; I darted in and looked round for water; a pitcher stood on the table, and I filled the jug hastily. Then, with a smile of sour triumph, I hurried back the way I had come. She should have no cause to complain of me. I had been wronged, and was minded to hug my grievance and keep the merit of the difference all on my side. That motive too commonly underlies a seeming patience of wrong. I would not for the world enrich her with a just quarrel, therefore I brought her water, ay, although she feigned not to desire it. There it was for her, let her take it if she would, or leave it if she would; and I set the jug down by the pasty. She should not say that I had refused to fetch her what she asked, although she had, for her own good reasons, flung my guinea into the sea. She would come soon, then would be my hour. Yet I would spare her; a gentleman should show no exultation; silence would serve to point the moral.
But where was she? To say truth, I was impatient for the play to begin and antic.i.p.ation grew flat with waiting. I looked down to the sh.o.r.e but could not see her. I rose and walked forward till the beach lay open before me. Where was Barbara?
A sudden fear ran through me. Had any madness seized the girl, some uncontrolled whim made her fly from me? She could not be so foolish. But where was she? On the moment of the question a cry of surprise rang from my lips. There, ahead of me, not on the sh.o.r.e, but on the sea, was Barbara. The boat was twelve or fifteen yards from the beach, Barbara"s face was towards me, and she was rowing out to sea. Forgetting pasty and jug, I bounded down. What new folly was this? To show herself in the boat was to court capture. And why did she row out to sea? In an instant I was on the margin of the water. I called out to her, she took no heed; the boat was heavy, but putting her strength into the strokes she drove it along. Again I called, and called unheeded. Was this my triumph? I saw a smile on her face. Not she, but I, afforded the sport then. I would not stand there, mocked for a fool by her eyes and her smile.
"Come back," I cried.
The boat moved on. I was in the water to my knees. "Come back," I cried.
I heard a laugh from the boat, a high nervous laugh; but the boat moved on. With an oath I cast my sword from me, throwing it behind me on the beach, and plunged into the water. Soon I was up to the neck, and I took to swimming. Straight out to sea went the boat, not fast, but relentlessly. In grim anger I swam with all my strength. I could not gain on her. She had ceased now even to look where my head bobbed among the waves; her face was lifted towards the sky. By heaven, did she in very truth mean to leave me? I called once more. Now she answered.
"Go back," she said. "I"m going alone."
"By heaven, you aren"t," I muttered with a gasp, and set myself to a faster stroke. Bad to deal with are women! Must she fly from me and risk all because I had not smiled and grinned and run for what she needed, like a well-trained monkey? Well, I would catch her and bring her back.
But catch her I could not. A poor oarsman may beat a fair swimmer, and she had the start of me. Steadily out to sea she rowed, and I toiled behind. If her mood lasted--and hurt pride lasts long in disdainful ladies who are more wont to deal strokes than to bear them--my choice was plain. I must drown there like a rat, or turn back a beaten cur.
Alas for my triumph! If to have thought on it were sin, I was now chastened. But Barbara rowed on. In very truth she meant to leave me, punishing herself if by that she might sting me. What man would have shown that folly--or that flower of pride?
Yet was I beaten? I do not love to be beaten, above all when the game has seemed in my hands. I had a card to play, and, between my pants, smiled grimly as it came into my mind. I glanced over my shoulder; I was hard on half-a-mile from sh.o.r.e. Women are compa.s.sionate; quick on pride"s heels there comes remorse. I looked at the boat; the interval that parted me from it had not narrowed by an inch, and its head was straight for the coast of France. I raised my voice, crying:
"Stop, stop!"
No answer came. The boat moved on. The slim figure bent and rose again, the blades moved through the water. Well then, the card should be played, the trick of a wily gamester, but my only resource.
"Help, help!" I cried; and letting my legs fall and raising my hands over my head, I inhaled a full breath and sank like a stone, far out of sight beneath the water. Here I abode as long as I could; then, after swimming some yards under the surface, I rose and put my head out again, gasping hard and clearing my matted hair from before my eyes. I could scarcely stifle a cry. The boat"s head was turned now, and Barbara was rowing with furious speed towards where I had sunk, her head turned over her shoulder and her eyes fixed on the spot. She pa.s.sed by where I was, but did not see me. She reached the spot and dropped her oars.
"Help, help!" I cried a second time, and stayed long enough to let her see my head before I dived below. But my stay was shorter now. Up again, I looked for her. She was all but over me as she went by; she panted, she sobbed, and the oars only just touched water. I swam five strokes and caught at the gunwale of the boat. A loud cry broke from her. The oars fell from her hand. The boat was broad and steady. I flung my leg over and climbed in, panting hard. In truth I was out of breath. Barbara cried, "You"re safe!" and hid her face in her hands.
We were mad both of us, beyond a doubt, she sobbing there on the thwart, I panting and dripping in the bows. Yet for a touch of such sweet madness now, when all young nature was strung to a delicious contest, and the blood spun through the veins full of life! Our boat lay motionless on the sea, and the setting sun caught the undergrowth of red-brown hair that shot through Barbara"s dark locks. My own state was, I must confess, less fair to look on.
I controlled my voice to a cold steadiness, as I wrung the water from my clothes.
"This is a mighty silly business, Mistress Barbara," said I.
I had angled for a new outburst of fury, my catch was not what I looked for. Her hands were stretched out towards me, and her face, pale and tearful, pleaded with me.
"Simon, Simon, you were drowning! Through my--my folly! Oh, will you ever forgive me? If--if you had come to hurt, I wouldn"t have lived."
"Yet you were running away from me."
"I didn"t dream that you"d follow. Indeed I didn"t think that you"d risk death." Then her eyes seemed to fall on my dripping clothes. In an instant she s.n.a.t.c.hed up the cloak that lay by her, and held it towards me, crying "Wrap yourself in it."
"Nay, keep your cloak," said I, "I shall be warm enough with rowing. I pray you, madame, tell me the meaning of this freak of yours."
"Nothing, nothing. I--Oh, forgive me, Simon. Ah, how I shuddered when I looked round on the water and couldn"t see you! I vowed to G.o.d that if you were saved----." She stopped abruptly.
"My death would have been on your conscience?" I asked.
"Till my own death," she said.
"Then indeed," said I, "I"m very glad that I wasn"t drowned."
"It"s enough that you were in peril of it," she murmured woefully.