She helped him into his overcoat and wished him a pleasant good-night.
It was long since she had lifted her cheek for his old hasty kiss, and he made no protest. He had time on his side.
She did not return to her embroidery frame but stood for several moments looking at the chest near the fireplace. She had not opened it since Masters left. His library had been packed and sent after him by one of his friends, but no one had known of the books in her possession. Masters certainly had not thought of them and she was in no condition to remember them herself at the time.
She had not dared to look at them! Tonight, however, she moved slowly toward the chest. She looked like a sleep-walker. When she reached it she knelt down and opened it and gathered the books in her arms. When her husband returned two hours later she lay on the floor in a dead faint, the books scattered about her.
XXVII
It was morning before he could revive her, and two days before she could leave her bed. Then she developed the hacking cough he dreaded.
He took her to the Sandwich Islands and kept her there for a month. The even climate and the sea voyage seemed to relieve her, but when they returned to San Francisco she began to cough again.
Do women go into a decline these days from corroding love and hope in ruins? If so, one never hears of it and the disease is unfashionable in modern fiction. But in that era woman was woman and little besides. If a woman of the fashionable world she had Society besides her family and housekeeping. She rarely travelled, certainly not from California, and if one of her band fell upon evil days and was forced to teach school, knit baby sacques, or keep a boarding-house, she was pitied but by no means emulated. Madeleine had neither house nor children, and more money than she could spend. She had nothing to ask of life but happiness and that was for ever denied her. Masters had never been out of her mind for a moment during her waking hours, and she had slept little. She ate still less, and kept herself up in Society with punch in the afternoon and champagne at night. Only in the solitude of her room did she give way briefly to excoriated nerves; but the source of her once ready tears seemed dry. There are more scientific terms for her condition these days, but she was poisoned by love and despair. Her collapse was only a matter of time.
Dr. Talbot knew nothing about psychology but he knew a good deal about consumption. He had also arrested it in its earlier stages more than once. He plied Madeleine with the good old remedies: eggnog, a raw egg in a gla.s.s of sherry, port wine, mellow Bourbon whiskey and cream. She had no desire to recover and he stood over her while she drank his potions lest she pour them down the washstand; and some measure of her strength returned. She fainted no more and her cough disappeared. The stimulants gave her color and her figure began to fill out again. But her thoughts, save when muddled by her tonics, never wandered from Masters for a moment.
The longing to hear from him grew uncontrollable with her returning vitality. She had hoped that he would break his promise and write to her once at least. He knew her too well not to measure the extent of her sufferings, and common humanity would have justified him. But his ship might have sunk with all on board for any sign he gave. Others had ceased to grumble at his silence; his name was rarely mentioned.
If she had known his address she would have written to him and demanded one letter. She had given no promise. Her husband had commanded and she had obeyed. She had always obeyed him, as she had vowed at the altar.
But she had her share of feminine guile, and if she had known where to address Masters she would have quieted her conscience with the a.s.surance that a letter from him was a necessary part of her cure. She felt that the mere sight of his handwriting on an envelope addressed to herself would transport her back to that hour in Dolores, and if she could correspond with him life would no longer be unendurable. But although he had casually alluded to his club in New York she could not recall the name, if he had mentioned it.
She went to the Mercantile Library one day and looked over files of magazines and reviews. His name appeared in none of them. It was useless to look over newspaper files, as editorials were not signed.
But he must be writing for one of them. He had his immediate living to make.
What should she do?
As she groped her way down the dark staircase of the library she remembered the newspaper friend, Ralph Holt, who had packed his books--so the chambermaid had informed her casually--and whom she had met once when walking with Masters. He, if any one, would know Masters"
address. But how meet him? He did not go in Society, and she had never seen him since. She could think of no excuse to ask him to call. Nor was it possible--to her, at least--to write a note and ask him for information outright.
But by this time she was desperate. See Holt she would, and after a few moments" hard thinking her feminine ingenuity flashed a beacon. Holt was one of the sub-editors of his newspaper and although he had been about to resign and join Masters, no doubt he was on the staff still.
Madeleine remembered that Masters had often spoken of a French restaurant in the neighborhood of the _Alta_ offices, patronized by newspaper men. The cooking was excellent. He often lunched there himself.
She glanced at her watch. It was one o"clock. She walked quickly toward the restaurant.
XXVIII
She entered in some trepidation. She had never visited a restaurant alone before. And this one was crowded with men, the atmosphere thick with smoke. She asked the fat little proprietor if she might have a table alone, and he conducted her to the end of the room, astonished but flattered. A few women came to the restaurant occasionally to lunch with "their boys," but no such lady of the haut ton as this. A fashionable woman"s caprice, no doubt.
Her seat faced the room, and as she felt the men staring at her, she studied the menu carefully and did not raise her eyes until she gave her order. In spite of her mission and its tragic cause she experienced a fleeting satisfaction that she was well and becomingly dressed. She had intended dropping in informally on Sibyl Forbes, still an outcast, in spite of her intercession, and wore a gown of dove-colored cashmere and a hat of the same shade with a long lilac feather.
She summoned her courage and glanced about the room, her eyes casual and remote. Would it be possible to recognize any one in that smoke?
But she saw Holt almost immediately. He sat at a table not far from her own. She bowed cordially and received as frigid a response as Mrs.
Abbott would have bestowed on Sibyl Forbes.
Madeleine colored and dropped her eyes again. Of course he knew her for the cause of Masters" desertion of the city that needed him, and the disappointment of his own hopes and ambitions. Moreover, she had inferred from his conversation the day they had all walked together for half an hour that he regarded Masters as little short of a G.o.d. He was several years younger, he was clever himself, and nothing like Masters had ever come his way. He had declared that the projected newspaper was to be the greatest in America. She had smiled at his boyish enthusiasm, but without it she would probably have forgotten him. She had resented his presence at the time.
Of course he hated her. But she had come too far to fail. He pa.s.sed her table a few moments later and she held out her hand with her sweetest smile.
"Sit down a moment," she said with her pretty air of command; and although his face did not relax he could do no less than obey.
"I feel more comfortable," she said. "I had no idea I should be the only lady here. But Mr. Masters so often spoke to me of this restaurant that I have always meant to visit it." She did not flutter an eyelash as she uttered Masters" name, and her lovely eyes seemed wooing Holt to remain at her side.
"Heartless, like all the rest of them," thought the young man wrathfully. "Well, I"ll give her one straight."
"Have you heard from him lately?" she asked, as the waiter placed the dishes on the table. "He hasn"t written to one of his old friends since he left, and I"ve often wondered what has become of him."
"He"s gone to the devil!" said Holt brutally. "And I guess you know where the blame lies--Oh!--Drink this!" He hastily poured out a gla.s.s of claret. "Here! Drink it! Brace up, for G.o.d"s sake. Don"t give yourself away before all these fellows."
Madeleine swallowed the claret but pushed back her chair. "Take me away quickly," she muttered. "I don"t care what they think. Take me where you can tell me--"
He drew her hand through his arm, for he was afraid she would fall, and as he led her down the room he remarked audibly, "No wonder you feel faint. There"s no air in the place, and you"ve probably never seen so much smoke in your life before."
At the door he nodded to the anxious proprietor, and when they reached the sidewalk asked if he should take her home.
"No. I must talk to you alone. There is a hack. Let us drive somewhere."
He handed her into the hack, telling the man to drive where he liked as long as he avoided the Cliff House Road. Madeleine shrank into a corner and began to cry wildly. He regarded her with anxiety, and less hostility in his bright blue eyes.
"I"m awfully sorry," he said. "I was a brute. But I thought you would know--I thought other things--"
"I knew nothing, but I can"t believe it is true. There must be some mistake. He is not like that."
"That"s what"s happened. You see, his world went to smash. That was the opportunity of his life, and such opportunities don"t come twice. He has no capital of his own, and he can"t raise money in New York.
Besides, he didn"t want a newspaper anywhere else. And--and--of-course, you know, newspaper men hear all the talk--he was terribly hard hit. I couldn"t help feeling a little sorry for you when I heard you were ill and all the rest; but today you looked as if you had forgotten poor Masters had ever lived--just a Society b.u.t.terfly and a coquette."
"Oh, I"m not blaming you! Perhaps it is all my fault. I don"t know!--But _that_! I can"t believe it. I never knew a man with as strong a character. He--he--always could control himself. And he had too much pride and ambition."
"I guess you don"t know it, but he had a weak spot for liquor. That is the reason he drank less than the rest of us--and that did show strength of character: that he could drink at all. I only saw him half-seas over once. He told me then he was always on the watch lest it get the best of him. His father drank himself to death after the war, and his grandfather from mere love of his cups. Nothing but a hopeless smash-up, though, would ever have let it get the best of him.... He was terribly high-strung under all that fine repose of his, and although his mind was like polished metal in a way, it was full of quicksilver.
When a man like that lets go--nothing left to hold on to--he goes down hill at ten times the pace of an ordinary chap. I--I--suppose I may as well tell you the whole truth. He never drew a sober breath on the steamer and he"s been drunk more or less ever since he arrived in New York. Of course he writes--has to--but can"t hold down any responsible position. They"d be glad to give him the best salary paid if he"d sober up, but he gets worse instead of better. He"s been thrown off two papers already; and it"s only because he can write better drunk than most men sober that he sells an article now and again when he has to."
Madeleine had torn her handkerchief to pieces. She no longer wept. Her eyes were wide with horror. He fancied he saw awful visions in them.
Fearing she might faint or have hysterics, he hastily extracted a brandy flask from his pocket.
"Do you mind?" he asked diffidently. "Sorry I haven"t a gla.s.s, but this is the first time I"ve taken the cork out."
She lifted the flask obediently and took a draught that commanded his respect.
She smiled faintly as she met his wide-eyed regard. "My husband makes me live on this stuff. I was threatened with consumption. It affects me very little, but it helps me in more ways than one."
"Well, don"t let it help you too much. I suppose the doctor knows best--but--well, it gets a hold on you when you are down on your luck."