"That clean-faced feller of yours would have the advantage then," said Mrs Bray. "And now I"ll tell you the point of that story. It was just the men stickin" up for themselves. If that had been a woman harmed by her husband going away with some barmaid, or other of them hussies men are so fond of, there wouldn"t have been nothing done to avenge _her_.
_Her_ heart could have broke, and if she said anything about it people would have sat on her, but when one of the poor darling men is hurt it"s a different thing."
Mrs Bray had yet more to tell, and after another hearty laugh divulged a secret that should have pleased a Government lately reduced to appointing a commission to inquire into a falling birth-rate.
"This," said grandma in explanation, "is a girl who used to be milliner in Trashe"s store in Noonoon--one of them give-herself-airs things, like all these county-jumpin" fools! W"en you go to buy a thing off of them they look as if you wasn"t fit to tie their shoe-laces, and they ain"t got a st.i.tch to their back, only a few pence a-week from eternal standin" on their feet, till they"re all give way, and only fit for the hospital. I won"t say but this one was a sprightly enough young body and carried her head high. And there was a feller came to town, was stayin" there at Jimmeny"s pub. for a time, an" walkin" round as if Noonoon wasn"t a big enough place for the likes of him to own. He talked mighty big about meat export trade, an" that was the end of his glory. He married this girl that was trimmin" hats, an" she thought she was doin" a stroke to ketch such a bug, an" now she lives in that little place built bang on the road as you go into town. Larry says he often takes her some meat, he"s afraid she"ll starve; an" you know, though he"ll take you down in some ways, he"s terrible good-natured in others, and that is the way with most of us; we have our good an" bad points. But the poor thing! is that what she has come to? I ain"t had a family of me own not to be able to sympathise with her."
"Well, she don"t deserve no sympathy, she upholds him in his pride,"
said Mrs Bray.
"Pride! His pride," snorted grandma, "it"s of the skunk order. He"d make use of every one because he thinks he"s an English swell, and then wouldn"t speak to them if he met them out no more than they were dogs. I don"t think there"s a single thing he could do to save his life. If there"s a bit of wood to be chopped, she"s got to do it, an"
yet he"d think a decent honest workin" man, who was able to keep his wife and family comfortable, wasn"t made of as good flesh and blood as him. That ain"t what I call pride."
"There"s one thing, if I ever fell in love with a man he"d have to be a man and not a crawler," said Dawn. "Some girls think if they get a bit of a swell he"s something; but I wouldn"t care if a man were the Prince of Wales and Lord Muck in one, if he couldn"t do things without muddling, I"d throw water on him."
"What about young Eweword, are you goin" to throw water on _him_?"
laughed Mrs Bray.
"Ask Carry, she knows more about him than I do."
"Dawn finds it handy to put her lovers on to me," said Carry, who was washing away the spilt tea and airing some uncomplimentary opinions of Andrew and Uncle Jake between whiles.
"Why don"t you come and see me, Carry?" continued Mrs Bray.
"I can"t be bothered, I"ve got my living to earn and have no time for visiting," said that uncompromising young woman.
"Anything new on here, Dawn?" asked Mrs Bray, turning to her.
"No, only Miss Flipp"s uncle is coming up by this afternoon"s train and we"re dying to see him, there"s been so much blow about him.
Andrew is going to get out a tub to hold the tips."
"Well, I"ll be going now to get Bray his tea or there"ll be a jawin"
and sulkin" match between us. That"s the way with men,--if you"re not always buckin" around gammoning you think "em somebody, they get like a bear with a scalded head. Well, come over and see me some day," she said hospitably to me. "Walk along a bit with me now and see the way."
To this I agreed, and going to get a parasol heard the incautious woman remark behind me--
"Seems to be an old maid--a gaunt-lookin" old party--ain"t got no complexion. I wonder was she ever going to be married. Don"t look as if many would be breakin" their necks after her, does she?"
Mrs Bray posed as a champion of her s.e.x, but could not open her mouth without belittling them. However, I was too well seasoned in human nature to be disconcerted, and walked by her side enjoying her immensely, she was so delightfully, transparently patronising. There are many grades of patronage: that from people who ought to know better, and which is always bitterly resented by any one of spirit; while that of the big splodging ignoramus who doesn"t know any better, to any one possessed of a sense of humour, is indescribably amusing.
Mrs Bray"s was of this order, and would have been galling only to the sn.o.b whose chief characteristic is a lack of common-sense--lack of common-sense being synonymous with sn.o.bbery.
"You"ll get on very well with old grandma," she remarked, "she ain"t such a bad old sort when you know her; she must have a bit of property too. Of course, I find her a bit narrer-minded, but that"s to be expected, seeing I"ve lived a lot in the city before I come here, and she"s only been up the country; but that Carry"s the caution. The hussy! I only asked her over out of kindness, being a woman with a good home as I have, and did you hear her? Them hussies without homes ain"t got no call to give themselves airs,--bits of things workin" for their livin"."
"I"m afraid I"m in the same category, as I have no home," I said by way of turning her wrath.
"Oh, well, yes, but you"re different; you don"t have to _work_ for your livin"."
"Have you any daughters?" I asked.
"I had one, but she soon married. Like me, she was snapped up soon as she was old enough." Mrs Bray laughed delightedly.
Here was a broad-minded democrat who considered a woman lowered in becoming a useful working member of society, instead of remaining a toy or luxury kept by her father or some other man, and who, while loudly bawling for the emanc.i.p.ation of women from the yoke of men, nevertheless considered the only distinction a woman could achieve was through their favourable notice--an att.i.tude of mind produced by moral and social codes so effectively calculated to foster immoral and untenable inconsistency!
THREE.
BECOMING ACQUAINTED WITH GRANDMA CLAY.
When I returned the "busman was driving away after having brought Miss Flipp"s uncle, and Andrew was a.s.sisting to fill a spring-cart with pumpkins. This vehicle had arrived under guidance of a tall, fair young man with perfect teeth and a pleasant smile, which kept them well before the public, seeing they were not concealed by any hirsute ambuscade, regarding the adorning qualities of which Dawn and her grandmother were divided. The former came out to inform Andrew that the pony had to be harnessed, as Mrs Clay had promised Miss Flipp she could drive her uncle back to catch the train.
"I hope the old thing won"t smash up the sulky," said Andrew. "He"s the old bloke that come down here in the summer in a check suit, an" I told him you was all out an" we was full up."
"A few of him would soon fill up. He! he! ha! ha!" laughed the fair young man. "He looks as if he were always full up! He! he! ha! ha!
ha!"
"Well, he"s the purplest plum I ever saw," said Dawn. "He"s a complete hog. He has one of these old noses, all blue, like the big plums that grew down near the pig-sty. I think he was grown near the pig-sty, too, by the style of him. It must have taken a good many cases of the best wine to get a nose just to that colour. Like a meerschaum pipe, it takes a power of colouring to get "em to the right tinge. And his eyes hang out like this," said the girl, audaciously stretching her pretty long-lashed lids in a way that would have been horrible on a less beautiful or less successfully saucy girl, but which in this case was irresistibly amusing. The fair young man was convulsed.
"His figure is like as if he had swallowed our great washing-copper whole and then padded round it with hay bags, and he has a great vulgar stand with one foot here and the other over there by the wheelbarrow."
"He must be a acrobat or be made of wonderful elastic, if he could stretch that far!" remarked Andrew.
"Yes, and he gets up a gold-rimmed eyegla.s.s and sticks it on his old eye like this, and so I up with my finger and thumb this way in a ring and looked at him," said Dawn, with a moue and the protrusion of a healthy pink tongue which for dare-devil impertinence beat anything I had seen off the stage, and I succ.u.mbed to laughter in chorus with the young man.
By some intangible indications Andrew and I felt impelled to leave, he proceeding to harness the horse and I accompanying him.
"Just look here, "Giddy-giddy Gout with his shirt-tail out,""
exclaimed the lad, breaking into one of the poetic quotations of which he was rarely guilty. "Now, I didn"t know me pants was tore. I must have looked a goat!"
I offered to put a st.i.tch in the breach, so he brought needle and thread.
"Now don"t you sew me on to me pants. Dawn done that once, thought it was a great lark, an" I jolly well couldn"t get out; so I busted up the whole show, and grandma joined in the huspy-puspy, and there"s been no more larks like that. Thanks, I must do a get and put the pony in. Did you notice that bloke fillin" up the cart with pumpkins? He"s gone on Dawn!"
"He shows good taste."
"Do you reckon Dawn"s fit to knock "em in the eye?"
"Rather!"
"That"s bein" a stranger! When you are used to a person every day an"
they belong to you, you don"t think so much of "em, and at the same time think more, if you can understand. What I mean is this. When I"m busy fightin" with Dawn, and she"s blowing me up for not doing things and tellin" grandma on me, I can"t see what the blokes can see in her; but then if I caught any one saying she wasn"t good for anything, if he was a bloke I felt fit to wallop, I"d give him a nice sollicker under the ear, an" I wouldn"t bother about any other girl. Do you see?"
"Yes; I"ll hold up the shafts for you."
"Thanks. Well, that"s "Dora" Eweword that"s doin" a kill with Dawn now."
"Dora is a funny name for a man."