Chapter 530 - Sides Of You
"W-what? What did you just…" Evie stammered, never expecting to hear those words coming from her husband"s own lips. "I"m not understanding all of this Gav… I need you to explain to me. Clearly."
Gavriel rose as well and leaned against the headboard, sighing with a soft smile on his gorgeous looking face. "What happened to just one question, hmm, my dearest wife?" he teased, and Evie crawled before him and grabbed onto the collar of his robe, giving him a pretend angry look.
"You think I can still sleep after all the things you have just told me? I need you to explain to me from square one Gav or else, I won"t be able to sleep at all!" she said seriously and Gavriel faked a helpless smile before his face became serious.
"Would you believe me if I tell you that Gavrael"s still with me?"
His question rendered Evie dumbstruck, and she was unable to speak for a while.
"R-really?" she stammered then she took a deep breath to calm down. "Wait… tell me, how? What exactly are you hiding from me? I knew… I knew you were hiding something from me since you woke up that day in Raven"s castle and returned to me as Gavriel again."
Gavriel half bit his lip before reaching out for Evie and caressed her face lightly, looking at her apologetically. "I"m sorry I lied and hid this from you. I was blinded with jealousy that I tried to hide the fact that he… that Gavrael was still with me. Gavrael had failed in his attempt to sacrifice his soul. At that time, we didn"t know the reason why it wasn"t working. But now I understand why. It"s all because our soul is actually one and the same. And since I had been against him sacrificing his soul, it didn"t work. That was why Gavrael didn"t disappear. He"s still within me."
Utterly speechless, Evie just sat there, looking at him for a long while. She had cried so heartbrokenly that time when she had thought Gavrael was gone. But now it seems he is still here? Return to her all her tears!
"But I understand everything now, Evie. And from now on, I won"t be cruel to him anymore." Gavriel"s voice weakened.
"What… cruel? You"re not…"
"I have been cruel to him, Evie. I treated him as some kind of tool, my invincible weapon. I had kept him locked within me for so long, ignoring his agony, and thought of him as a monster I needed to cage at all costs. Then I let him out only when I needed his help to protect myself and you. And after all his sacrifices were made, I had then become jealous of him and even regretted not letting everything about him completely disappear." He confessed, staring at Evie"s shoulder now. "Now he"s back in his cage deep within me since I forced him to stay there that moment before he swallowed Galleous" dark magic."
"Forced… him?"
"Yes. I forced him to stay when he already decided to completely disappear."
Evie fell silent as she tried to process everything that she was hearing.
"You"re not… cruel Gav," was what Evie had said in a weak voice.
"Just cruel to myself…" he smiled apologetically then let out a sigh, looking away again. "But from here on, I will make up to him and be fair to him. I"ve already accepted the fact that he"s always been a part of me. That without him, I wouldn"t even be here, right now, in your arms. I have taken his powers for granted for too long, just because I can suppress him easily. So I"m not going to be greedy and keep him in that cage this time. This time, I"ll let him out not only when I need him." There was a gentle smile in his eyes as he said that. Then he kissed Evie"s forehead. "I also just want to tell you, my wife… that I"m beyond thankful that you just loved all of me, in whatever form I may appear in or whatever side of me I"d show you."
Evie remained speechless even as Gavriel hugged her tightly and she automatically responded by hugging him back. She could feel that he is genuine with his words, but she could still feel him struggling a little no matter how he tried to appear cool about it. He was trying his best to come to terms with this issue about himself. And she knew it must be hard. This was one thing that she could not help but wonder how well she could deal with something this complicated if she was the one being in his shoes.
"I have already told you Gav, I"ll always love all sides of you. What kind of love would it be if I can only love the good and beautiful side of you? And if I can only love the present you and not the past or the future you? I want you to know everything about you, the bad and the good, the past and the present that made who you are right now. I believe if I"m the one in your shoes, you will also love me regardless of what I"ve become or whether I"m the past or present version of myself, right?"
Gavriel smiled, his eyes gleaming as he looked at her. "You"re right. Now that you"ve mention it, thinking of it this way is making these feelings less complicated. I can"t imagine myself not falling for whatever version of you that you"d show me." He let out a deep sigh, shaking his head a little ruefully. "d.a.m.n… I feel much better now. I should have talked to you about this sooner. Thank you, my love." He pulled her close and embraced her hard.
The next moment, Evie felt the air around him changed. A familiar darkness suddenly seeped out of him. Wait a moment...
Slowly, she pulled away and the moment she lifted her eyes and looked into Gav"s own, vivid and intense blue orbs gazed longingly at her.