Chapter 544 - It"s Okay
This was the very first time she had spoken and looked at him this way.
But Gav"s gaze remained gentle, looking at her with understanding as he stretched his hand out towards her. "Come here, love." He said and Evie looked away angrily, fists tightly held in a curved ball. He had to approach her and gently pull her into his arms again. "I"m sorry…" he whispered, and Evie shut her eyes and clung onto him. Her body shook a little as she inhaled and tried to gather her emotions that had got the better of her.
Gavriel rubbed her head and back in a small, circular, soothing motion as he started to whisper to her. "I"m not stopping you, Evie. I just feel that you"re being too emotional right now. It"s like you"re rushing to do things to distract yourself from something else. And I"m afraid that you"d be overwhelmed emotionally once you start seeing those memories too."
She started to pull away, but Gav held on tightly to her and kissed her mouth when she opened them to scold him, knowing that her temper had flared at what he said again.
Evie struggled for a moment but as Gav deepened the kiss, she slowly gave in to his insistence.
"Listen, Evie…" he murmured when their lips finally parted, as he lovingly pressed his forehead against hers while caressing her satiny cheeks with his thumbs. "Your pregnancy is making you very emotional and sensitive. So as much as possible, I don"t want you to be bombarded with so many things to think about all at once when your mind is already filled with disturbing thoughts. I know you"ve been troubled, my love. So troubled that I can"t take it any longer. This issue about the mating bond that you"re so worried about…" he breathed sharply, "please Evie, trust me… there is nothing for you to worry about. You –"
"Nothing to worry about?!" Evie blurted out, her voice shrill. The waves of pain and anger filling her eyes now. "How can I not worry? Huh? Gav? When any time now, your true mate might pop out of nowhere and take you away from me? I know! I know you love me. But I also know that the mating bond is very strong, an impossible thing for anyone to go against with. Once you see her, you"ll fall for her and want her without a doubt, whether you like it or not! How could you tell me to stop thinking about it? I can"t! I"ve been trying to ignore it. But I love you too much to bear even the possibility of your true mate appearing and then take you away from me any time now! More so that I am currently pregnant with your child!" Evie yelled, her tears falling from the corners of her eyes now. "I"ve been telling myself that I am your fated mate, that all I have to do is wait for it to spark, and that our time will definitely come in the future. But Gav…" her tears fell uncontrollably. "We spent one lifetime together before and despite all the things that had happened between us, the bond still didn"t spark! And this time too… we"ve already been through a lot… so much… so much, Gav… and yet… can you blame me for thinking this way? Is it so hard to understand my fears that it"s all because of there being no bond between us at all? I know it is a bad time for doing this. There are more important matters to deal with than this right now, I know that! But… I can"t help it. I hate this. I hate that I just become like this whenever it comes to you… being fragile, emotional, sensitive, irrational… I hate it. I hate it! I"m a queen, I shouldn"t be… like this…"
She then suddenly broke down sobbing and Gavriel held her so tightly in his arms, peppering to top of her head with kisses. "It"s okay, love. Just because you"re a queen doesn"t mean you"re not allowed to cry and have fears, Evie. You"re like this because you"re not a heartless queen. And don"t forget that you"re also pregnant. I"ve been told that some women get so emotional and sensitive during their pregnancy due to the changing hormones in their body. So please don"t hate yourself, love. It"s normal for you to be like this once in a while." He whispered to her lovingly as he kissed her tears away.
"And I understand you full well, Evie. If I was the one to be in your shoes, the thought that another man might suddenly appear and claim you as his mate would probably drive me so insane, I don"t think I would be able to take it as well." He caught her small face in his large palms and smiled at her with all the love in the world flashing across his steely grey eyes. "That"s why I am willing to do anything to solve this issue and relieve you from this mess. I wanted you to be at your best shape mentally and physically before any trouble breaks out."
Evie met his gaze, while still sniffling, wondering what he actually meant by those words.
"I"ve found a way to solve this matter about the mating bond, Evie." He the added and Evie"s eyes widened. But the hope that suddenly blazed in her eyes instantly died down the next second at the thought that came into her head.
"You"re not talking about the forced mating bond ritual, are you?" she asked and to her shocked surprise, he shook his head.
"No, love. I"m not talking about that. There is no way I"ll let you go through that ridiculous ritual. Not when there are so many negative impacts at risk."
"Then… what other way do you have?! T-tell me." her heartbeat was in her throat as she asked that, her hope-filled eyes seeking answers from those silvery grey orbs that were fixed intently on her. "What did you find out?"