Spring Once More

chapter 8

(Traditional Chinese cover scanned by Dairytea)

Chapter Eight

My second return to the mortal realm was just as noisy as the first. Just as my eyelids quiver and crack open, I hear this squeaky, androgynous voice that just about sends me back to the Bridge of Hopelessness.

“Quickly now! Deliver the news! His Seventh Highness has awoken!”

“Zhang-gonggong.”The melodious tone of a female voice nearly brings tears to my eyes. Finally, aG.o.dd.a.m.n woman around here! “Do not dare fool us now. Our son…has our son trulyawoken?”

I wiggle my fingers and openmy eyes to a beautiful woman in courtly attire bounding toward me. “O my son!”she bawls. “You’ve finally awoken. Do you know how worried I was?!”

Oh s.h.i.t, she’s the prince’sbirth mother, the empress dowager herself. I pretend to be weak as I pushmyself up in bed. “Empress Mother.”

Before I can finish, I findmyself drawn into her bosom and rubbed endearingly. “What were you trying todo, scaring me half to death like that?! You must know, I almost left thisworld along with you… O you hound! But you had some goodness left in you,enough to come back… Your brother, His Majesty, asked me to wait a few days forthe yin energy to disperse before I came to see you, but before I could…youwent and….”

Geez, do I feel awkward being strokedin her arms. At the end of the day, she’s the prince’s mother, not mine. Judgingfrom her looks, she must have been ‘a real knockout’ in her prime. If she weretwenty years younger, I’d run after her even if I lose both my shoes. Being sotightly embraced by such an elegant and charming lady feels really awkward,especially since I haven’t been around women for so long. But what can I do? Ijust have to start seeing her as my real mom.

I tighten my jaw as I try toenjoy the ma.s.sage. The empress dowager’s tears keep gushing out like the HuaiRiver when the w.a.n.gjiaba Damis opened.

“…I advised you before not tokeep those improper things in the manor. You can play around, but there’s alimit with everything, all right? If only you had heeded my words, these twoincidents would not have occurred. I have ordered the Ministry of Punishment tosend Pei Ruoshui to death row. That wicked w.a.n.g Rui is imprisoned there aswell, and I specifically ordered men to keep an eye on him so he cannot findsolace in a quick death. There he shall stay until you fully recover, afterwhich you may ask your brother for an imperial edict to kill him however youlike.”

I wriggle out from her embrace– it’s time for honour and virtue!

“Empress Mother, why don’t welet those two go?”

“What was that?” Herdelicately painted brows furrow as she pinches my cheeks. “Dear prince, isyour head still hurting? I shall call the imperial physician to examineyou.”

I brush her hand away and a.s.sumea solemn face and tone. “I am serious, Empress Mother. After two encounters withdeath, we realize our past mistakes. I committed many evils and well deserve todie. I have decided to change for the better and be a new, better man. Empress Mother, I think you will agree with me when I say that I am at fault with regards tothe tanhua. This time wasn’t Ruoshui’sfault, either. I hit my head with the pillow of my own accord.”

Her hand clutches at herchest. “But why, dear child…”

“It was the heavens’intentions.” I look up towards the sky with a sigh. “I committed too many sins,enough to be struck down by heavenly judgment, thrown into the pits of h.e.l.l.Fortunately, heaven gave me a chance to return and lead a new life. But if I wereto commit the same sins, I would hit myself for the smaller offences, and for aserious offence, I would actually be struck by lightning!”

Thrown into the pits of h.e.l.l…LOL!Well, it’s too d.a.m.n bad I never tried to bean actor or an insurance salesman!

Her hand tightens around hercollar.

“Empress Mother, please letthose two go for my sake so that I can begin a new life. Not to mention it was I who committed those hideous crimes. If we punished them, it would only smearthe good name of our house and damage the righteous image of my brother, HisMajesty.”

Her eyes begin to water andthen close. Out like a light. I roll out of bed as the throng of eunuchs andmaids rush to fan her and ma.s.sage her head. f.u.c.k me, but these maids are prettycute. A short while later, the empress dowager comes to and pulls me close bythe shoulders.

While beating on my torso, shecries, “O my prince! O poor me! O poor me! To think after fastingand praying to Buddha for so many years that we would see you change for thegood…”

I nod vigorously while holdinga grin. d.a.m.n, it’s not easy being a good person! Can’t you be a little gentler,mamadukes? You think you’re hitting your son, but I’m the one who’s hurting!

Gonggong was a suffixused for high-ranking eunuchs.

A dam on the Huai River, near the eponymous w.a.n.gjiaba Town in AnhuiProvince.

The Buddhist fast isseen as a cleansing ritual. Animal products and alcohol as well as the fivespices (onion, spring onion, garlic, green garlic and chives) are forbidden,and solid food is forbidden after early afternoon.

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Dairytea:

Chapter Nine

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