Stalky and Co

Chapter 23

"Lots in the corner," Sefton replied. "Hurry up! Stop blubbin", you brute, Beetle. We"re goin" to have a giddy campaign. Losers have to sing for the winners--sing odes in honor of the conqueror. You call yourself a beastly poet, don"t you, Beetle? I"ll poet you."

He wriggled into position by Campbell"s side. Swiftly and scientifically the stumps were thrust through the natural crooks, and the wrists tied with well-stretched box-ropes to an accompaniment of insults from McTurk, bound, betrayed, and voluble behind the chair. Stalky set away Campbell and Sefton, and strode over to his allies, locking the door on the way.

"And that"s all right," said he in a changed voice.

"What the devil--?" Sefton began. Beetle"s false tears had ceased; McTurk, smiling, was on his feet. Together they bound the knees and ankles of the enemy even more straitly.

Stalky took the arm-chair and contemplated the scene with his blandest smile. A man trussed for c.o.c.k-fighting is, perhaps, the most helpless thing in the world.

""The bleatin" of the kid excites the tiger." Oh, you frabjous a.s.ses!"

He lay back and laughed till he could no more. The victims took in the situation but slowly. "We"ll give you the finest lickin" you ever had in your young lives when we get up!" thundered Sefton from the floor.

"You"ll laugh the other side of your mouth before you"ve done. What the deuce d"you mean by this?"

"You"ll see in two shakes," said McTurk. "Don"t swear like that. What we want to know is, why you two hulkin" swine have been bullyin" Clewer?"

"It"s none of your business."

"What did you bully Clewer for?" The question was repeated with maddening iteration by each in turn. They knew their work.

"Because we jolly well chose!" was the answer at last. "Let"s get up."

Even then they could not realize the game.

"Well, now we"re goin" to bully you because we jolly well choose. We"re goin" to be just as fair to you as you were to Clewer. He couldn"t do anything against you. You can"t do anything to us. Odd, ain"t it?"

"Can"t we? You wait an" see."

"Ah," said Beetle reflectively, "that shows you"ve never been properly jested with. A public lickin" ain"t in it with a gentle j.a.pe. Bet a bob you"ll weep an" promise anything."

"Look here, young Beetle, we"ll half kill you when we get up. I"ll promise you that, at any rate."

"You"re going to be half killed first, though. Did you give Clewer Head-knuckles?"

"Did you give Clewer Head-knuckles?" McTurk echoed. At the twentieth repet.i.tion--no boy can stand the torture of one unvarying query, which is the essence of bullying--came confession.

"We did, confound you!"

"Then you"ll be knuckled;" and knuckled they were, according to ancient experience. Head-knuckling is no trifle; "Molly" Fairburn of the old days could not have done better.

"Did you give Clewer Brush-drill?" This time the question was answered sooner, and Brush-drill was dealt out for the s.p.a.ce of five minutes by Stalky"s watch. They could not even writhe in their bonds. No brush is employed in Brush-drill.

"Did you give Clewer the Key?"

"No; we didn"t. I swear we didn"t!" from Campbell, rolling in agony.

"Then we"ll give it to you, so you can see what it would be like if you had."

The torture of the Key--which has no key at all--hurts excessively. They endured several minutes of it, and their language necessitated the gag.

"Did you give Clewer Corkscrews?"

"Yes. Oh, curse your silly souls! Let us alone, you cads."

They were corkscrewed, and the torture of the Corkscrew--this has nothing to do with corkscrews--is keener than the torture of the Key.

The method and silence of the attacks was breaking their nerves. Between each new torture came the pitiless, dazing rain of questions, and when they did not answer to the point, Isabella-colored handkerchiefs were thrust into their mouths.

"Now are those all the things you did to Clewer? Take out the gag, Turkey, and let "em answer."

"Yes, I swear that was all. Oh, you"re killing us, Stalky!" cried Campbell.

"Pre-cisely what Clewer said to you. I heard him. Now we"re goin" to show you what real bullyin" is. "What I don"t like about you, Sefton, is, you come to the Coll. with your stick-up collars an" patent-leather boots, an" you think you can teach us something about bullying. Do you think you can teach us anything about bullying? Take out the gag and let him answer."

"No!"--ferociously.

"He says no. Rock him to sleep. Campbell can watch."

It needs three boys and two boxing-gloves to rock a boy to sleep. Again the operation has nothing to do with its name. Sefton was "rocked" till his eyes set in his head and he gasped and crowed for breath, sick and dizzy.

"My Aunt!" said Campbell, appalled, from his corner, and turned white.

"Put him away," said Stalky. "Bring on Campbell. Now this _is_ bullyin".

Oh, I forgot! I say, Campbell, what did you bully Clewer for? Take out his gag and let him answer."

"I--I don"t know. Oh, let me off! I swear I"ll make it _pax_. Don"t "rock" me!"

""The bleatin" of the kid excites the tiger." He says he don"t know. Set him up, Beetle. Give me the glove an" put in the gag."

In silence Campbell was "rocked" sixty-four times.

"I believe I"m goin" to die!" he gasped. "He says he is goin" to die.

Put him away. Now, Sefton! Oh, I forgot! Sefton, what did you bully Clewer for?"

The answer is unprintable; but it brought not the faintest flush to Stalky"s downy cheek.

"Make him an Ag Ag, Turkey!"

And an Ag Ag was he made, forthwith. The hard-bought experience of nearly eighteen years was at his disposal, but he did not seem to appreciate it.

"He says we are sweeps. Put him away! Now, Campbell! Oh, I forgot! I say, Campbell, what did you bully Clewer for?"

Then came the tears--scalding tears; appeals for mercy and abject promises of peace. Let them cease the tortures and Campbell would never lift hand against them. The questions began again--to an accompaniment of small persuasions.

"You seem hurt, Campbell. Are you hurt?"

"Yes. Awfully!"

"He says he is hurt. Are you broke?"

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