*
“Platinum.”
“Yes, platinum.” He Luo rubbed the ring on her finger, showing the Pt950 carving inside. Tian Xin’s mouth formed an o-shape and, a couple days later, called her excitedly: “I read in the newspaper today that platinum is even more expensive than sterling silver! Did your family’s Zhang Yuan hit the lottery?”
He Luo grumbled, “Honestly, I don’t know what he’s busying about or how much energy he’s putting into his work. I don’t care if he buys me any expensive gifts, or spending how much energy to chat with me. I hope he can look that much more further into the future and plan for our future together.”
“Ah, why should we care about that between us?” He Luo said.
He Luo felt like there was a need to clear things up with Zhang Yuan for once and for all. She waited for Zhang Yuan at the bus terminal, under the dazzling July sunshine. It had not rained for a long while and the poplar trees had not welcomed any wind lately. Even the lush-green leaves were curling a little. Every time they approached summer, Zhang Yuan’s skin would turn a wheat colour. He had just cut his hair and was waving at her from across the street. His smile was bright and brilliant, revealing a row of neat, white teeth.
“There’s no cover at all. The sun is too bright for this.” Zhang Yuan glanced at He Luo. “Hey, do you want to have the same skin colour as mine?”
“Don’t hesitate any longer. I’ll just sell you two tickets for the price of one. Isn’t that good enough?” The staff further tempted them, “You’ll get a really clear view of the river.”
He Luo asked, “Are you still busy lately? I remember you once told me you had a very important thing going on. What was it?”
After going round and round, the Ferris wheel came to a full circle. The horizon went up and down.
He Luo opened the refrigerator, took out the ice tray, and knocked a few cubes into her light blue, dolphin-printed plastic cup. The second she poured c.o.ke into the cup, it fizzled and the bubbles threatened to splash out of the cup. Carrying the cup, she tiptoed back to her room. It was close to midnight. Unable to sleep, she stepped on the bedside table and climbed onto the windowsill to sit there. Past the lush greenery, she could see the small flying insects buzzing underneath the dim streetlights. In the corner of the street was the distant shine of the spotlights, dying the dark blue sky grey.
Yet, after the bubbles dissipated, the saccharin taste of artificial sweetness lingered, leaving no room for any good memories.
Fu Peng was a graduate student of a local prestigious university. Two years ago, he partic.i.p.ated in the building of the university’s intranet. He had even written operating management systems for a number of organisations. Before he had even graduated, he was already offered a job with the annual salary of 200,000 yuan. In Zhang Yuan’s own words, his software engineering talent was enough to shame a large number of Zhang Yuan’s professors.
This was the first time He Luo saw Zhang Yuan respected a person this much. His eyes even shone when he talked about Fu Peng. She felt relieved when she saw Zhang Yuan regained his former confident and determined self. He Luo liked the ambitious Zhang Yuan who had his dreams, yet she still hoped that he would work hard with his feet on the ground. She hoped he would realise a realistic, sensible dream. She worried that, as smart and proud as he was, he would want to achieve a quick success, exchanging his future for monetary gains.
“How far is reality from an ideal? I can’t tell.” A light green insect flew by her side, as she lowered her head to write. She stopped now and then to think over her words. “It’s just that, no matter how pretty a dream is, after coming face to face with reality it’ll inevitably turn into ash. Perhaps my thinking is old-fashioned and conservative. But whatever you’ve decided to do, I’ll wholeheartedly support you.”
She folded the letter and put it inside an envelope. Then she took it back out to add on an extra sentence at the end: “You must remember that I believe in you, the same way I believe in myself.”
Thus, as she lived isolated from the outside world in the Da Xing training facility, she kept speculating his response. In the middle of the night, she was on guard duty. She was a little dizzy from all the thinking she has done.
“Report!” His expression was serious, yet carried a hint of mischievousness. The corners of his lips lifted a few times but it was as if he was using all his concentration not to smile. Finally, with clear determination, he yelled, “Report! I’m a pig, I’m a pig, I’m a pig…”
“I know.” Shen Lie helplessly pointed at the boy’s camp. “Who told me to lose at poker.”
“We’ll be gathering in a moment anyway, didn’t you also join the National Day parade rehearsal?” Shen Lie said. “You have never visited Chang An’s night streets, have you? You can even walk right in the middle of the roads.”
“Okay, okay. I’ll go back now,” he said. “But you’re not thanking me? You haven’t laughed this hard in awhile.”
Perhaps she really had not laughed out loud in a long time. Every single day, she had to face a non-smiling, stern-faced instructor, had to train under the hot sun, had to run and roll across a muddy field, and had only two, three opportunities to wash up in the twenty-something days of their training. However, this kind of life was innocent and pure, so she was happy. After they ate dinner and cleaned up, the group of girls gathered and began chattering, discussing which instructor was cute or which was manly.
“What kind of sunscreen are you using? Recommend it to us,” Ye Zhi asked.
“A full man doesn’t understand the urgency of a hungry man,” Ye Zhi retorted. “Look all us sunburned girls here. When we stand guard at night, you can only see our uniform floating in the darkness.”
Ye Zhi said, “What are you laughing about? You’re the only one who thinks it’s a joke.” She mimicked the stern tone of their instructor, but after awhile, she herself laughed. “Hey, hey, let’s give our monitor a Western nickname, alright? Julia White [Zhu Li Ya Bai], that’s how he p.r.o.nounced it.”
Cai Man Xin said, “Guys, look. I came over to chat with He Luo but she totally ignored me and spent the whole time staring at the sky. No matter what we said, she couldn’t take it in at all.”
He Luo was indeed staring at the soft clouds gathered in the sky. She returned to her senses and said, “Who said I’m daydreaming? You’re all like a bunch of sparrows, I can’t even put a word in.”
The group of people yelled, “Not right, not right!”
*
He Luo asked, “What did your monitor said to leave such a deep impression?”
Laughing, He Luo nudged him. “You only know how to eat. If some day our faculty offers free watermelon, you’ll eat the thing whole. If a person eats two slices, you’ll eat three more.”
The moving electronic screens floated across, carrying a dizzying mix of colour and light. One vehicle followed another as they moved out of the intersection, pa.s.sing an awed crowd. A peng sound shook and a brilliant firework exploded in the night sky. The sound grew louder and louder as more fireworks lit the sky overhead. A magnanimous yellow, sapphire blue, burgundy, cherry red ―the colours were like delicate embroidery on dark satin.
Underneath the fireworks, everyone were happily cheering and looking up. It was as if a handful of stars were falling. Youth, along with the fireworks, dispersed in that short moment of glory. They can only blame the too-gentle, beautiful night sky, for tempting them in that moment to take up the commitment of a lifetime.
The young people who would exchange flirtatious glances in daytime, can hide their embarra.s.sment under the cover of such a romantic moment. He Luo didn’t know how many more young people has taken courage from this night but in that moment where she looked up, the hand she had let fall was being lightly held.
Silence. It was as if they were imprisoned in a transparent cage. The excitement of the crowd was surging yet it was like the two of them existed on a different plane, their breaths loud enough to be embarra.s.sing.
He was briefly stunned, his hand was still frozen in that moment, fingers curled up around what was formerly He Luo’s hand. And then he held onto He Luo’s arm, his voice excited as he said, “Hey, don’t just spend all day staring at the fireworks. Look to your front, there are even long-range missiles!” He let go, pointing here and there as he explained about the model of the missiles.
*
Tian Xin raised an eyebrow. “Oh, is it? Can you say for sure that Shen Lie has totally no other intentions? It’s just that his set of tricks are a bit old. When it comes to being [showing off] handsome or romantic, who can surpa.s.s Cla.s.smate Zhang? In the past, your family’s Zhang Yuan also did not lack these skills when it comes to you. He was so ambiguous, like a cat playing with a mouse, making it so your heart would itch and long for him.”
Tian Xin giggled. “I’m trying to help you see through the other person’s heart. Holding your hand this time is a kind of impulse, how about the next? Without even knowing it, you’ll end up getting trapped in complicated love games. When it comes to that, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Tian Xin didn’t refute, only loudly complaining, “Exactly. I’ve been sitting there writing so much my a.s.s is growing callousess.”
“You also have to update me. Even if I’m going home, I’m also keeping my eye on your progress in Beijing.” Tian Xin mysteriously said, “A certain someone came over during break last year and earned He Luo’s first kiss [in English]. What about this time? Are there any upgrades?” For instance, those kind… Where is he staying this time? Since he’s earning so much from his part-time job, it must at least be a three-star hotel.”
“You’re so cruel!” Tian Xin cried. “He Luo, oh He Luo, you’re not only killing Cla.s.smate Zhang’s fantasy, you’re also hurting Cla.s.smate Shen’s feelings!”
“While still holding your luggage?” He Luo laughed. “You’re not worried of being called a terrorist?”
“And then they’ll send you to Beijing mental hospital,” she giggled. “Don’t bring so many things this time, it’ll look strange.”
“Who said so? Of course there’ll be someone caring for you.” He Luo paused. “Your mom.”
Before the sun was even up, sleepy Chang An were awaken by the parade partic.i.p.ants running across the streets. Everyone was out of breath. A panting Shen Lie complained, “Is this an evacuation drill? Or an air defense demonstration?” None of them had even the energy to laugh.
“He did call…” Ye Zhi was hesitant. “He said he’s not coming.”
“I also wondered whether Tong Jia Ting this muddlehead heard wrongly.”
“Maybe he’s only joking and is trying to give He Luo a surprise,” Ye Zhi said. “Did he use a very serious or kidding tone? You can’t even tell.”
Zhang Yuan asked, “You’re back? I saw on TV that the students section are the most chaotic.”
“Home,” Zhang Yuan answered. “Earlier I’ve told your roommate that something urgent came up and I can’t leave.”
“I’m not playing around,” he said. “If you don’t believe me, you can call my house number. I’m really at home.”
“How would I know?” He Luo frowned. She didn’t have the patience to explain. Earlier she asked Zhang Yuan, “Why is it so sudden? Did something happen… is everything okay?”
“Why can’t it wait a few days? The entire country is on holiday now, what did he need help with that is so urgent?” He Luo complained. “Even if there’s a change to the plan, you should’ve told me earlier. What exactly is so urgent?”
“No need,” He Luo said coolly. “You won’t tell me everything from A to Z anyway. Every time you’d say it’s a long story.”
“Don’t I have to wait for the other person’s confirmation?” Shen Lie explained.
“It’s okay to release your pent-up feelings now,” he said. “When you go back, ask Zhang Yuan calmly. He cares for you so much. Maybe he has some kind of problem.”
Maybe he has some kind of problem. He Luo remembered Shen Lie’s words. Zhang Yuan’s face was gloomy. Since he didn’t say much, she didn’t dare to ask much. Her worry and concern were both leaping from her throat, threatening her words to spill. The city has just newly repaired a wooden church built in the last century, outside it were dancing Russian girls in their puffy skirts. The accordionist was playing cheerful Russian pokka.
“Forget it. I don’t like noisy places.” His tone was moody and tired.
Zhang Yuan didn’t want to go either. Under the dark trees, there was nowhere for him to hide from the topic he didn’t want to discuss. Lately he had been busy out of his mind. On the 30th when he was packing for his Beijing trip, he heard a rumour that Fu Peng was detained at the public safety bureau for creating trouble while drunk. He was detained, fined, and his university was informed. Not one punishment was missed. When Zhang Yuan asked further, it turned out that a company registered Fu Peng’s invention as their patent and even accused him of plagiarism. In a fit of anger, Fu Peng smashed the gla.s.s wall of the company’s office, even smashing the head of the project manager who had come to stop him. The manager suffered seven st.i.tches in his head.
“They’re all looking out for one another. I’m really disappointed,” Fu Peng said. “No, I’m disheartened. I’ve decided to study my doctorate in America. Kindness between humans, that’s the most Chinese quality, yet the only kindness growing here is nepotism.”
“Then just think of me as being as ostrich. I don’t want to fight with these people anymore. It just so happens that there’s a research centre in America that has just invited me to join them,” he said. “Little brother, I’ll convince them to let you join.”
But all this Zhang Yuan didn’t want to tell He Luo. Even if he told He Luo, it wouldn’t change anything. It would only worry her further. Can she not ask anything? He only wanted to sit beside He Luo, holding tightly onto her hand, as if he was holding onto the hope of an entire world.
They rented a two-seater bicycle, with He Luo helming. In just awhile, she complained it was difficult to control the bicycle and wanted to be lazy in the back. Zhang Yuan said, “You’re really someone who gives up easily, like a child.” When they made it down a low slope, they gently glided down where a gold avenue(?) has appeared at the end of the path.
“Dindal light phenomenon, what’s there to be surprised about.”
“Light path,” he said. “You’re really forgetful. We learned that in high school.”
“It’s a part of your education,” he said. “If you blindly absorb information, no matter how good your score is, you’ll still be naive as a person.”
“Yes. I want to work.” Zhang Yuan stopped the bicycle by the path, walked towards the gra.s.sy land near the river, and sat there. “But I want to go my own way, like what Fu Peng is doing. He has shared his experience and expertise with me, I can prevent a lot mishaps that way.”
He replied, “Yes. This is our country’s drawback. That’s why some people refuse to come back after going to America.”
He was quiet. He Luo, oh He Luo, you always looked at the world with such crystal clear eyes, yet why do you doubt my perception of my future and career? Don’t tell me all these. My thoughts and yours are no different.
Zhang Yuan glanced at her. “Oh, are you thirsty? Why don’t I buy you a bottle of water?”
“Aren’t you too tired from talking so much? Can we just sit here quietly for awhile?” Zhang Yuan said. “I’m just really tired. Really.” He closed his eyes and laid there, opening his arms and legs like a snow angel. The surrounding gra.s.s had already yellowed. The breeze swept the flowers by the river, and they went up and down, like golden waves.
She lifted her head. The wind had gotten stronger, even the clouds were flying past quickly. In autumn, the northern sky was so high up, so blue and so lonely. The two of them underneath such a sky was immeasurably small.
“En.” A mellow, tired sound.
“En. So sleepy.” He had not slept well the past two days. Beside her, he could finally relax.
Everything will naturally fall into their place, like the southern gra.s.sland and northern wind will always meet in the winter of each year.