"Still can"t," Lamb added, nuzzling her.
Vix didn"t have a clue what The B-School was but it didn"t matter. n.o.body noticed.
"I came to Boston after the divorce, after living my entire life in Chicago," Abby said. "I"d hoped Daniel would come, but you know how it is, he didn"t want to leave his friends or his school." She tried to tousle Daniel"s hair but he pulled away angrily. "So, for now, Daniel"s living with his dad."
Vix kept nodding, the way reporters do on TV when they"re conducting an interview, to prove they"re really listening.
"And when I get my MBA, next summer," Abby continued, "I"ll decide whether to go back to Chicago or look for a job in the East." She smiled at Lamb, a private kind of smile.
Vix wondered if she knew about Trisha.
Lamb SHE"S WONDERFUL, isn"t she? He can"t believe his luck, how she came into his life out of nowhere, when he least expected it. And this one"s a keeper. It"s not just the s.e.x. Everything about her makes him happy. She"s so bright, so sweet. The kids are going to be crazy about her. He can"t believe he"s thinking this way. Thinking about a future with this woman. But he is.
EVERY DAY LAMB SANG in the outdoor shower. "All You Need Is Love," "Come Together," "We Can Work It Out." He was happy. He was in love. The happier he was over Abby, the unhappier Caitlin grew. And he didn"t seem to notice.
One day Vix overheard Daniel telling Abby, "This place is a dump. They don"t even have a TV or a dishwasher."
You didn"t have to be a genius to see that Lamb had as hard a time making do as her parents. All you had to do was look around at the shabby furniture, the beat-up cars, the clothes they wore. They even ate poor. No meat, not even hamburgers.
"I"d like you to remember you"re a guest in this house," Abby told Daniel. "And I expect you to behave in a way that doesn"t embarra.s.s any of us."
"I don"t see why you had to drag me here," Daniel said. "This is supposed to be my vacation."
"You"ve been at camp all summer," Abby told him. "You"ve had plenty of vacation, but I"ve got just these two weeks."
"Dad says your whole life is a vacation."
"Don"t start, Daniel a"
"If you"d let Gus come I"d get off your back."
Abby sighed. "We"ve already been through this. Two weeks without a friend won"t kill you."
"It might," Daniel said.
Vix was embarra.s.sed for eavesdropping. She decided not to tell Caitlin what she"d overheard. It was too a personal.
That night they played mini golf. Daniel held his club like a pro, one hand over the other, thumbs locked. He checked his feet to make sure they were lined up properly. He took two practice swings on each shot. Caitlin and Vix hooted. Daniel told them to shut up. He was trying to concentrate. He took the game seriously. His father played. His father had an eight handicap, whatever that meant.
They"d played mini golf to celebrate Vix"s twelfth birthday, on the last day of July. Sharkey had shot a hole in one that night, winning them a free game. n.o.body won a free game this time.
After, over ice cream at Mad Martha"s, Daniel started in on Abby about inviting a friend. Abby said no as if she meant it, but Daniel didn"t give up. He campaigned all the way home. Finally, Lamb said, "It"s okay with me if he wants to invite somebody."
"All right," Abby said. "All right!" He"d finally broken her down. "You can call Gus when we get back."
Two days later Gus Kline arrived, s.h.a.ggy-haired, open-faced, loud, and slovenly. He walked in like he owned the place, checking out the fridge, helping himself to the leftovers from last night"s dinner. "Hey, Baumer a" he said, p.r.o.nouncing it bomber and doing a one-two punch. "How"s it going?"
"Since you got here," Daniel said, punching him back and smiling for the first time, "things are definitely looking up."
Abby SHE"LL BE d.a.m.nED if she"s going to let the kids spoil this. Never mind the hatred in Caitlin"s eyes. It was a mistake to walk into her life unannounced and unexpected. She should have known better. It might take some time but she"ll win her over. She"s always wanted a daughter and this one looks like she could use some mothering. Besides, in less than ten years the children will be grown. But why is she thinking this way? She and Lamb have known each other just four months.
Before they met she"d been thinking about having another child. She"s just thirty-seven. There"s still time. Yet now that it looks serious between her and Lamba"at least she hopes it"s seriousa"she"s less sure. Three surly teenagers seem like more than she"d bargained for. Of course, a baby would be something else. A baby could bind them together. But she knows from experience it can also drive a wedge between a couple. It was never the same between her and Marty after Daniel was born. She"d never expected him to be jealous of the baby, to compete with him for her affections, making demands she couldn"t possibly meet, but there it was.
In the year since she"s left him she"s grown stronger, more confident. She"s not afraid to put her foot down now and she"s sure she can see the respect in Daniel"s eyes.
Truth is, she hadn"t planned on falling in love so soon. Too soon, her friends say. But is she supposed to walk away from the best man she"s ever known because it"s too soon? How ironic, to meet him now, when she"s determined never to be dependent on a man again.
She tries not to think about the old hippie girlfriend on the boat, even when Caitlin drops hints. Trisha bakes the best m.u.f.fins, and she"s got incredible b.r.e.a.s.t.s. Imagine this twelve-year-old child talking to her about b.r.e.a.s.t.s! She"d had to bite her tongue.
They have s.e.x together a f.e.l.l.a.t.i.o and c.u.n.n.i.l.i.n.g.u.s. Ask Lamb if it"s not true.
She"d wanted to belt her that time. Instead, she"d said, This is not an appropriate subject.
Why not?
Because it isn"t. She"d walked away but could feel Caitlin"s pleasure.
She"d gone to Lamb in a jealous rage. This thing between you and Trisha a There hasn"t been a thing between Trisha and me for a long time.
Why does Caitlin think there is?
Caitlin"s twelve, Ab. What does she know?
But she told me a She"s just trying to ruffle your feathers.
She talked about f.e.l.l.a.t.i.o and c.u.n.n.i.l.i.n.g.u.s.
What?
My feelings exactly.
He started laughing. I told you it wouldn"t be easy with her.
I should have believed you.
6.
Summer 1978 VIX SUPPOSED a person who vowed never to be ordinary, never to be boring, would welcome changes, but when it came to the Vineyard Caitlin wanted things exactly as they"d always been and was furious that the house had been renovated without her knowledge, not to mention her permission.
"What the f.u.c.k?" Caitlin said, a look of total disbelief on her face when she took her first look at the new and improved Psycho House.
"We wanted to surprise you," Abby said.
"Surprise me?" Caitlin asked. "Surprise me!"
Abby and Lamb had been married over Easter. Caitlin had flown to Boston for the wedding. Vix pressed for details but Caitlin didn"t want to talk about it. It was too depressing. "At least Phoebe doesn"t marry her boyfriends."
Caitlin pushed past Abby and marched through the house without a word, her hands clenched, her mouth tight. Vix dutifully followed. When Caitlin stopped dead in the middle of the living room, Vix did, too. Personally, she thought the house looked fantastic. Skylights had been cut into the ceiling flooding it with light. Big windows and French doors had been added. The huge pine trees that blocked out the sun and cast weird shadows at night had been relocated to the woodsy side of the house, opening the view to the pond and to the Sound, beyond. You could see the ferries coming and going and the sailboats flying their spinnakers. The old furniture was dressed in crisp blue and white slipcovers. There were vases filled with zinnias and sisal rugs that felt p.r.i.c.kly underfoot.
Abby waited, a hopeful look in her eyes, but Caitlin raced up the stairs and flung open the door to her room. Nothing in there had been touched. It was exactly as they"d left it. Vix was disappointed but Caitlin said, "Thank G.o.d!"
Abby had followed and was standing in the doorway. "I thought you"d like to do your room yourself," she told Caitlin. "You know, choose your own colors and accessories."
Vix was thinking what a great time they"d have painting the drab wooden walls, organizing the collections, shopping in town. But Caitlin said, "I like it exactly the way it is, thank you!" and she slammed the bedroom door in Abby"s face.
If Abby thought she was going to win points with Caitlin by making changes, she was mistaken. Vix wished there was a way for her to let Abby know that trying to please was not the way to win Caitlin"s affection. People who tried too hard disgusted her.
A minute later Caitlin kicked off her shoes and smashed them against the wall. She beat her mildewed pillows against the books on her shelves until one of them opened, its feathers flying in all directions. She attacked her rock collection, sweeping it onto the floor. She hurled tennis racquets and swim fins across the room, then grabbed her desk chair and crashed it against the door of her closet. She cursed and cried as she destroyed everything in her path.
Vix was in shock. She"d never seen anyone behave that way. Once, in fourth grade, she"d come home from school crying hysterically because a boy in cla.s.s had called her a wh.o.r.e. She"d had no idea what the word meant. Neither did he but she didn"t know that at the time. Wh.o.r.e, wh.o.r.e, wh.o.r.e a the other boys in the cla.s.s chanted, taunting her for a week.
Tawny had shown no sympathy. "Save your tears for something important, Victoria. There"s no need to display your emotions in public. Do you want those boys to have power over you?"
"No."
"Then remember what I"m telling you. Keep your feelings to yourself. Don"t ever show anyone your disappointment."
That was the last time she"d let Tawny see her tears.
As she crouched between the twin beds, protecting her head with her hands, she thought about Tawny"s advice and felt proud for knowing how to keep her feelings to herself. Obviously no one had taught Caitlin to save her tears for something important.
Finally, Caitlin threw herself on her bed.
There was nothing Vix could say to comfort her. Instead, she handed Caitlin a box of tissues then sat beside her, rubbing her back.
Caitlin blew her nose. "You"re the only one in this house I don"t hate. You"re the only one who cares about me."
Caitlin didn"t even hate her when Vix got her period, though Caitlin wanted desperately to be first. "I guarantee I"ll be first with everything else!" she promised.
Maybe a maybe not, Vix thought. This was the first thing she"d had that Caitlin wanted and she liked the feeling.
They hiked the two miles to town without telling anyone, to buy pads for Vix, then Caitlin escorted her to the secret bathroom behind Patisserie Francaise on Main Street and helped her stick the pad inside her pants.
Outside, they ran into Trisha, who was delivering m.u.f.fins to the gourmet food shop. "Lordy a look who"s here!" Trisha set the tray on the hood of her truck and handed each of them a peach m.u.f.fin. She was wearing short shorts and an orange T-shirt. Vix thought of those gigantic b.r.e.a.s.t.s and warned hers not to grow that big.
"So how"s the bride and groom?" Trisha asked.
Caitlin made a retching sound.
Trisha nodded. "You think you know somebody really well and then they go and do something so outrageous a so totally off the wall a"
"He should have married you!" Caitlin said.
"Oh, honey a you"re not the only one who"s thinking that."
Only when Caitlin decided to hitch home did Vix balk. "I"m not allowed to hitch." Though the idea of walking back with the sun beating down on her when she was already feeling queasy, made her wish she could.
"This is the Vineyard, Vix. Everybody hitches."
"I can"t. It"s the one thing I"ve promised my parents I"ll never do, along with drugs and s.e.x before marriage."
"That"s three things."
"You know what I mean."
But moments later an old blue Camaro screeched to a halt. There were two guys in the car, both wearing baseball caps and wraparound gla.s.ses. And the driver was him, the National Treasure.
"Heading up island?" Von asked.
Caitlin turned to Vix. "You can walk if you want but I"m riding." The other one, Bru, let his seat fall forward so Caitlin could squeeze into the back of the car.
"You getting in or not?" Bru asked Vix. "Because we"re holding up traffic as you can see."
She followed Caitlin into the car, thinking there had to be exceptions to every promise. Besides, if they were going to be killed it would be better to be killed together, otherwise she"d have to explain to Lamb why Caitlin was murdered and she wasn"t.
Caitlin yanked Von"s ponytail.
He lowered his shades and looked at them through his rearview mirror. "I knew this was my lucky day," he said, turning on the charm. "Hey, Bru a get a look at what we caught."
"Uh-huh," Bru answered, about as excited as if they"d reeled in two sardines.
They were heading out of town, past the Italian Scallion vegetable stand, past mini golf, past the Tashmoo Overlook, to Lambert"s Cove Road where Caitlin told Von to take a right. "How far up?" he asked.
"I"ll let you know." When she did, Von slammed on the brakes making them fall forward against the front seats, which he found funny.
"Thanks for the ride," Caitlin said. "See you at the Flying Horses."
"Not this year," Von told her. "I"m working at the fish market this year."
"Which one?" Caitlin asked.
"That"s for me to know and you to find out," Von said.
"Yeah a well, save me a fish head," Caitlin said.
"I"ll save you something better than that," Von told her. "See me in about three years to collect."
"Don"t hold your breath," Caitlin sang, slamming the car door.
They could hear the boys laughing as they pulled back onto the road and floored it.