"How soon--do--you go away?" she asked, in a low voice.
"Almost immediately," he said, watching her. She had not shed a single tear, but there was a strange look on her face. "Nothing is to be said about it. I shall be supposed to have started on a travelling-expedition, that is all."
"And you go--forever?"
"Yes."
She rose.
"We shall see you yet before you go?"
"Natalie," he said, in despair, "I had come to try to say good-bye to you; but I cannot, my darling, I cannot! I must see you again."
"I do not understand why you should wish to see again one like me," she said, slowly, and the voice did not sound like her own voice. "I have given you over to death: and, more than that, to a death that is not honorable; and, yet I cannot even tell you that I am grieved. But there is pain here." She put her hand over her heart; she staggered back a little bit; he caught her.
"Natalie--Natalie!"
"It is a pain that kills," she said, wildly.
"Natalie, where is your courage? I give my life without question; you must bear your part too."
She still held her hand over her bosom.
"Yet," she said, as if she had not heard him, "that is what they say; it kills, this pain in the heart. Why not--if one does not wish to live?"
At this moment the door was opened, and the mother came into the room.
"Madame," said Brand, quickly, "come and speak to your daughter. I have had to tell her something that has upset her, perhaps, for a moment; but you will console her; she is brave."
"Child, how you tremble, and how cold your hands are!" the mother cried.
"It does not matter, mother. From every pain there is a release, is there not?"
"I do not understand you, Natalushka?"
"And I--and I, mother--"
She was on the point of breaking down, but she held firm. Then she released herself from her mother"s hold, and went forward and took her lover"s hand, and regarded him with the sad, fearless, beautiful eyes.
"I have been selfish," she said; "I have been thinking of myself, when that is needless. For me there will be a release--quickly enough: I shall pray for it. Now tell me what I must do: I will obey you."
"First, then," said he, speaking in a low voice, and in English, so that her mother should not understand, "you must make light of this affair, or you will distress your mother greatly, and she is not able to bear distress. Some day, if you think it right, you may tell her; you know nothing that could put the enterprise in peril; she will be as discreet and silent as yourself, Natalie. Then you must put it out of your mind, my darling, that you have any share in what has occurred. What have I to regret? My life was worthless to me; you made it beautiful for a time; perhaps, who knows, it may after all turn out to have been of some service, and then there can be no regret at all. They think so, and it is not for me to question."
"May I not tell my mother now?" she said, imploringly. "Dearest, how can I speak to her, and be thinking of you far away?"
"As you please, Natalie. The little I have told you or Evelyn can do no harm, so long as you keep it among yourselves."
"But I shall see again?" It was her heart that cried to him.
"Oh yes, Natalie," he said, gravely. "I may not have to leave England for a week or two. I will see you as often as I can until I go, my darling, though it may only be torture to you."
"Torture?" she said, sadly. "That will come after--until there is an end of the pain."
"Hush, you must not talk like that. You have now one with you whom it is your duty to support and console. She has not had a very happy life either, Natalie."
He was glad now that he was able to leave this terror-stricken girl in such tender hands. And as for himself, he found, when he had left, that somehow the strengthening of another had strengthened himself. He had less dread of the future; his face was firm; the time for vain regrets was over.
CHAPTER XLIII.
A QUARREL.
Meanwhile, almost immediately after George Brand had left the house in Lisle Street, Reitzei and Beratinsky left also. On shutting the street-door behind them, Beratinsky bade a curt good-night to his companion, and turned to go; but Reitzei, who seemed to be in very high spirits, stayed him.
"No, no, friend Beratinsky; after such a fine night"s work I say we must have a gla.s.s of wine together. We will walk up to the Culturverein."
"It is late," said the other, somewhat ungraciously.
"Never mind. An hour, three-quarters of an hour, half an hour, what matter? Come," said he, laying hold of his arm and taking him away unwillingly, "it is not polite of you to force me to invite myself. I do not suppose it is the cost of the wine you are thinking of. Mark my words: when I am elected a member, I shall not be stingy."
Beratinsky suffered himself to be led away, and together the two walked up toward Oxford Street. Beratinsky was silent, and even surly: Reitzei garrulous and self-satisfied.
"Yes, I repeat it; a good night"s work. For the thing had to be done; there were the Council"s orders; and who so appropriate as the Englishman? Had it been you or I, Beratinsky, or Lind, how could any one of us have been spared? No doubt the Englishman would have been glad to have Lind"s place, and Lind"s daughter, too: however, that is all settled now, and very well done. I say it was very well done on the part of Lind. And what did you think of my part, friend Beratinsky?"
"I think you made a fool of yourself, friend Reitzei," said the other, abruptly.
Reitzei was a vain young man, and he had been fishing for praise.
"I don"t know what you mean," he said, angrily.
"What I mean I say," replied the other, with something very like cool contempt. "I say you made a fool of yourself. When a man is drunk, he does his best to appear sober; you, being sober, tried to appear drunk, and made a fool of yourself."
"My friend Beratinsky," said the younger man, hotly, "you have a right to your own opinion--every man has that; but you should take care not to make an a.s.s of yourself by expressing it. Do not speak of things you know nothing about--that is my advice to you."
Beratinsky did not answer; and the two walked on in silence until they reached the _Verein_, and entered the long, resounding hall, which was nearly empty. But the few members who remained were making up for their paucity of numbers by their mirth and noise. As Beratinsky and his companion took their seats at the upper end of the table the chairman struck his hammer violently, and commanded silence.
"Silentium, meine Herren!" he thundered out. "I have a secret to communicate. A great honor has been done one of our members, and even his overwhelming modesty permits it to be known at last. Our good friend Josef Hempel has been appointed Hof-maler to the Grand-duke of ----. I call in you to drink his health and the Grand-duke"s too!"
Then there was a quick filling of gla.s.ses; a general uprising; cries of "Hempel! Hempel!" "The Duke!" followed by a resounding chorus--
"Hoch sollen sie leben!
Hoch sollen sie leben!
Dreimal hoch!"--
that echoed away down the empty hall. Then the tumult subsided; and the president, rising, said gravely,