"I will give it to Louisa," cried Miss Quincey with a touch of pa.s.sion.
"Tchee--tchee!" At that idea the Old Lady chuckled in supreme derision.
"Capers and nonsense! Louisa indeed! Much good it"ll do Louisa when you"ve been and nipped all the shape out of it to suit yourself. However you came to be so skimpy and flat-chested is a mystery to me. All the Quinceys were tall, your uncle Tollington was tall, your father, he was tall; and your sister, well; I will say this for Louisa, she"s as tall as any of "em, and she has a _bust_."
"Yes, I daresay it would have been very becoming to Louisa," said Miss Quincey humbly. "I--I thought it was lavender."
"Lavender or no lavender, I"m surprised at you--throwing money away on a thing like that."
"I can afford it," said Miss Quincey with the pathetic dignity of the turning worm.
Now it was not worm-like subtlety that suggested that reply. It was positive inspiration. By those simple words Juliana had done something to remove the slur she was always casting on a certain character. Tollington Moon had not managed his nieces" affairs so badly after all if one of them could afford herself extravagances of that sort. The blouse therefore might be taken as a sign and symbol of his innermost integrity.
So Mrs. Moon was content with but one more parting shot.
"I don"t say you can"t afford the money, I say you can"t afford the colour--not at your time of life."
Two tears that had gathered in Miss Quincey"s eyes now fell on the silk, deepening the mauve-pink to a hideous magenta.
"I was deceived in the colour," she said as she turned from her tormentor.
She toiled upstairs to the back bedroom and took it off. She could never wear it. It was waste--sheer waste; for no other woman could wear it either; certainly not Louisa; she had made it useless for Louisa by paring it down to her own ridiculous dimensions. Louisa was and always had been a head and shoulders taller than she was; and she had a bust.
So Miss Quincey came down meek and meagre in the old dress that she served her for so many seasons, and she looked for peace. But that terrible old lady had not done with her yet, and the worst was still to come.
No longer having any grievance against the blouse, Mrs. Moon was concentrating her attention on that more mysterious witness to Juliana"s foolishness--the Cake.
"And now," said she, pointing as she might have pointed to a monument, "will you kindly tell me the meaning of this?"
"I expect--perhaps--it is very likely--that Dr. Cautley will come in to tea this afternoon."
The Old Lady peered at Miss Quincey and her eyes were sharp as needles, needles that carried the thread of her thought pretty plainly too, but it was too fine a thread for Miss Quincey to see. Besides she was looking at the cake and almost regretting that she had bought it, lest he should think that it was eating too many of such things that had made her ill.
"And what put that notion into your head, I should like to know?"
"He has written to say so."
"Juliana--you don"t mean to tell me that he invited himself?"
"Well, no. That is--it was an answer to my invitation."
"_Your_ invitation? You were not content to have that man poking his nose in here at all hours of the day and night, but you must go out of your way to send him invitations?"
"Dr. Cautley has been most kind and attentive, and--I thought--it was time we paid him some little attention."
"Attention indeed! I should be very sorry to let any young man suppose that I paid any attention to him. I should have thought you"d have had a little more maidenly reserve. Besides, you know perfectly well that I don"t enjoy my tea unless we have it by ourselves."
Oh yes, she knew; they had been having it that way for five-and-twenty years.
"As for that cake," continued the Old Lady, "it"s ridiculous. Look at it.
Why, you might just as well have ordered wedding cake at once. I tell you what it is, Juliana, you"re getting quite flighty."
Flighty? No mind but a feminine one, grown up and trained under the shadow of St. Sidwell"s, could conceive the nature of Miss Quincey"s feelings on being told that she was flighty. She herself made no attempt to express them. She sat down and gasped, clutching her Browning to give herself a sense of moral support. All the rest was intelligible, she had understood and accepted it; but to be told that she, a teacher in St.
Sidwell"s, was flighty--the charge was simply confusing to the intellect, and it left her dumb.
Flighty? When Martha came in with the tea-tray and she had to order a knife for the cake and an extra cup for Dr. Cautley, she saw Mrs. Moon looking at Martha, and Martha looking at Mrs. Moon, and they seemed to be saying to each other, "How flighty Miss Juliana is getting."
Flighty? The idea afflicted her to such a degree that when Dr. Cautley came she had not a word to say to him.
For a whole week she had looked forward to this tea-drinking with tremors of joyous expectancy and palpitations of alarm. It was to have been one of those rare and solitary occasions that can only come once in a blue moon. The lump sum of pleasure that other people get spread for them more or less thickly over the surface of the years, she meant to take once for all, packed and pressed into one rapturous hour, one Sat.u.r.day afternoon from four-thirty to five-thirty, the memory of it to be stored up and economised so as to last her life-time, thus justifying the original expense. She knew that success was doubtful, because of the uncertainty of things in general and of the Old Lady"s temper in particular. And then she had to stake everything on his coming; and the chances, allowing for the inevitable claims on a doctor"s time, were a thousand to one against it. She had nothing to go upon but the delicate incalculable balance of events. And now, when the blue moon had risen, the impossible thing happened, and the man had come, he might just as well, in fact a great deal better, have stayed away. The whole thing was a waste and failure from beginning to end. The tea was a waste and a failure, for Martha would bring it in a quarter of an hour too soon; the cake was a waste and a failure, for n.o.body ate any of it; and she was a waste and a failure--she hardly knew why. She cut her cake with trembling fingers and offered it, blushing as the gash in its side revealed the thoroughly unwholesome nature of its interior. She felt ashamed of its sugary artifice, its treacherously festive air, and its embarra.s.sing affinity to bride"s-cake. No wonder that he had no appet.i.te for cake, and that Miss Quincey had no appet.i.te for conversation. He tried to tempt her with bits of Browning, but she refused them all. She had lost her interest in Browning.
He thought, "She is too tired to talk," and left half an hour sooner than he had intended.
She thought, "He is offended. Or else--he thinks me flighty."
And that was all.
CHAPTER VII
Under a Blue Moon
It was early on another Sat.u.r.day evening, a fortnight after that disastrous one, and Miss Quincey was taking the air in Primrose Hill Park. She was walking to keep herself warm, for the breeze was brisk and cool. There was a little stir and flutter in the trees and a little stir and flutter in her heart, for she had caught sight of Dr. Cautley in the distance. He was coming round the corner of one of the intersecting walks, coming at a frantic pace, with the tails of his frock-coat waving in the wind.
He pulled himself up as he neared her and held out a friendly hand.
"That"s right, Miss Quincey. I"m delighted to see you out. You really are getting strong again, aren"t you?"
"Yes, thank you--very well, very strong."
Was it her fancy, or did his manner imply that he wanted to sink that humiliating episode of the tea-party and begin again where they had left off? It might be so; his courtesy was so infinitely subtle. He had actually turned and was walking her way now.
"And how is _Sordello?_" he asked, the tone of his inquiry suggesting that there was something seriously the matter with _Sordello_.
"Getting on. Only fifty-six pages more."
"You _are_ advancing, Miss Quincey--gaining on him by leaps and bounds.
You"re not overdoing it, I hope?"
"Oh no, I read a little in the evenings--I have to keep up to the standard of the staff. Indeed," she added, turning with a sudden suicidal panic, "I ought to be at home and working now."
"What? On a half-holiday? It _is_ a half-holiday?"
"For some people--not for me."
His eyes--she could not be mistaken--were taking her in as they had done before.
"And why not for you? Do you know, you"re looking horribly tired. Suppose we sit down a bit."