Author: Su Youbing
Translator: chiangyushien, Renkun27
Proofreader: KainGuru
With regard to the process of a certain Xiao Bai [1] getting acquainted with a certain Great G.o.d, it mainly happened because of an urgent patch up after a beautiful mistake.
([1]「小白」"Xiao Bai" has two meanings: 1) a novice, and 2) the endearment for the MC since his name is Zeng Bai.)
In this regard, a formerly famous host, who played the role of a key matchmaker, but was not on set, said this: "In this case, I have fully embodied the responsibilities and obligations that must be a.s.sumed as a supporting role. Regrettably, the world has not given me the appreciation that I deserve."
With this sentence, the ma.s.s media also interviewed a director who had been working with the formerly famous host. He said this: “To be a man, you shouldn"t be too shameless, especially as a moderator, or else NCC will become CNN.”
This dialogue had caused a violent response on the internet. Some netizens started a poll on the moral quality of a certain formerly famous host in the most well-known forum in the country, which was the Boundless Sea and Sky Forum. The poll was divided into three options ABC, and they were:
A. A certain formerly famous host is shameless.
B. A certain formerly famous host is more shameless than CNN.
C. A certain formerly famous host is not as shameless as CNN.
The poll was valid for a week. After a week, the number of votes for A and C had been almost even, and the suspense lasted until the last second of the deadline!
In the end, option C with 5,199,856 votes defeated option A with a weak 526,528 votes.
The Boundless Sea and Sky Forum concluded with "CNN Invincible."
The aforementioned was just a small segment derived from the story of the two protagonists. Next, I wanted to talk about the main body of the story.
Anyhow, it was a warm sunny day with beautiful weather and vast clear skies.
Since "GO! GO! SU… SUPERSTAR" began broadcasting, the ratings have been averaging from twenty to nearly thirty percent. The stars who came to the show were all big names. The signboards were a little smaller and had to be held.
The hosts of the show, Luo Peijiao and Shi Daming, also took advantage on the situation to become the hosts of NCC TV. They even won the audience-voted ‘My Favorite Hosting Partners" for more than two consecutive years.
So before today, Director Chen Fei had lived comfortably. Needless to say, Shi Daming, the veteran host who previously had the original scripts in that place, every three sentences that he wrote would be able to produce a show highlight, and for the script, it would absolutely bring success. As for Luo Peijiao, that man was lazy. Fortunately, he was not stupid. He could follow the script and looked pretty good, and the viewers margin was excellent. If this continued, there would be no problem for at least another year.
However, that evaluation only lasted until today.
Well today——
“d.a.m.n it, Luo Peijiao! I’m going to kill you——” Chen Fei’s strong stream of anger was just like a typhoon that rapidly pa.s.sed through and killed the studio"s wilderness and trees.
The lighting engineer was trembling in fear. He looked up at the shaking light bulb. That was already the third one.
“The Great G.o.d [2] is coming.” The young a.s.sistant"s whispers caught the attention of a certain livid famous director.
([2] This is what the people call Yan Su"ang.)
Chen Fei’s expression immediately changed. He suddenly smiled brilliantly like a bunch of blooming roses and politely said to Yan Su’ang, who was surrounded by the studio staff: "Why did you come so early?”
Yan Su’ang forced a smile and said: “There’s still ten minutes to go.”
Chen Fei stopped smiling. “How time flies.” d.a.m.n it, Luo Peijiao! I’m going to kill you —— huhu. What will I do with today"s live broadcast?
His smile glistened under the lighting and arrogance was written all over his face.
“Luo Peijiao hasn’t arrived yet?” The Great G.o.d swept a glance at everyone.
“This,” Chen Fei was struggling inside. “He, he, he"s ill. It"s really serious. He can’t get up.”
The Great G.o.d"s gaze swept over, “Oh.”
Chen Fei"s heart calmed down.
“He actually went to Qingdao to recuperate.”
It was a bolt from the blue!
Chen Fei exaggeratedly widened his eyes. “How did you know that he went to Qingdao?”
The Great G.o.d raised his mobile phone, “He texted me.”
Chen Fei crouched in the corner and cried. He lied to the Great G.o.d, huhu, and shamefully got exposed in public!
"d.a.m.n Luo Peijiao! I’m going to kill you——"
The a.s.sistant apologized to the Great G.o.d: “The director had an intermittent breakdown.”
With a good understanding of others, the Great G.o.d nodded. “It looks very difficult to heal.”
Shi Daming, who was reading the script, swept his glance to this side. “Director Chen, there’s still seven minutes.”
Chen Fei stood up and his tears were quickly recovered. “Where’s the subst.i.tute?”
“He"s coming!”
The a.s.sistant pushed a trolley through the door, “They’re all here. Just pick them up. They"re all on discount."
More than a dozen people piled up together, like the dead fish in the food market. From this scene, it was easy to misunderstand that they were still in the slave era.
Chen Fei swept a glance, “Women, OUT!”
The a.s.sistant was dissatisfied. “This is gender discrimination!”
Chen Fei pointed to one direction, “Look.”
“Great G.o.d, your chest muscles are very strong.”
“Great G.o.d, your hair is so stylish.”
“Great G.o.d, your lips are so s.e.xy.”
“Great G.o.d, you have a nice b.u.t.ton on your clothes…”
The Great G.o.d’s figure was quickly drowned in the crowd of women.
The a.s.sistant wiped his cold sweat. “Never mind, there"re only three men. Number one!”
The first one stood out.
His long hair was like snow. It was like blue and white porcelain. Unless there was a time machine, he was about to become some remains of a person.
Chen Fei pointed to Shi Daming. “There"s already a father here. We don’t need a grandfather.”
Shi Daming bit the script in grievance.
The a.s.sistant’s voice trembled: “Number two.”
If the last one was about to become the remains of a person, then this one was already the remains of a person.
Chen Fei said with sympathy: “If the plastic surgery fails, you should sue them. Don"t hold back.”
The a.s.sistant did a facepalm, "Number three…”
It was only now that Chen Fei felt that a golden ray shined into his eyes.
A cute boy with big, watery eyes stood there innocently. Those others in the odd background served as a foil to him. He was as pure as an angel.
“It"s him!” Chen Fei made the final decision! There was also a general amongst the dwarves. He was taller than that boy. “How tall are you?”
The boy raised his head and blinked his lovely eyes. “—One meter and sixty-five.”
“Well, it"s not much different with Luo Peijiao.”
——Luo Peijiao was secretly grudging on the plane: I am one meter and seventy-eight huh… Seventy-eight.
Snap! A snapping sound was made by the fingers, and the women automatically separated on both sides. The Great G.o.d looked at him with a smile, "Not bad."
The atmosphere was suddenly rendered pink, and the peach blossoms bloomed, one after another in the studio.
Shi Daming looked left and right, then said in a very low voice: “Although I don’t want to say it, I have no choice but to say… It’s still two minutes before we start.”
“What"s your name?” Chen Fei pushed him in front of the camera.
"Zeng Bai."
"Well, Xiao Bai, what did you do before?"
"Selling pork."
Chen Fei puffed out, "Didn"t you graduate from a famous art university?"
Zeng Bai nodded and said: “Well.” The director felt a little relieved. Testing life out after graduating from an art university by selling pigs… was also possible. Zeng Bai added, "No."
What are you nodding your head for?! Was this not a waste of his feelings.
Chen Fei rapped his head.
The a.s.sistant on the side nervously said: "There"s still ten seconds."
"… Insert ads for me!"
"Ha!" Shi Daming was dumbfounded.
Did the director mean to insert ads at the very beginning?
Thereupon, the viewers waiting to watch "GO! GO! SU… SUPERSTAR" in front of their TV sets on that very day saw the following scenes——
“h.e.l.lo everyone. I"m your host, Shi Daming.” Shi Daming’s smile had not fully blossomed. The scene took a turn and there was a huge black hole on the screen. The bird man flew out from inside and held a bottle of milk in his hand, then valiantly and spiritedly said: "To choose the right brand, don"t fear the darkness."
Chen Fei threw a script at Zeng Bai"s face, "Study it. If you have a question, just give me a smile. If you don"t have a question, just give me a smile, too! The others are handed over to Daming." This was giving medicine to a dead horse [3]. He piously gazed up to the sky and prayed: Buddha, bless and protect me… Amen!
([3]「死马当活马医」to keep trying everything in a desperate situation)
The time got into the countdown.
The Great G.o.d sat on the glistening throne.
Shi Daming sorted out the clothes.
The make-up artist gave Xiao Bai a powder, as if her life depended on it.
"ACTION!"
The viewers in front of their TV sets were finally freed from the overwhelming advertis.e.m.e.nts.
This time, Shi Daming"s smile made them feel very touched.
“Hey, Luo Peijiao, why did you do plastic surgery to look like this?” Shi Daming uncouthly smiled at Xiao Bai sitting on the side.
Xiao Bai looked down at the script, then spoke out sternly from a sense of justice, "You didn’t write the dialogue above.”
Shi Daming"s tears flowed inside of him like a river, yet his expression was still very professional, "Don"t change the topic! The viewers wanted to know why after a week that they haven’t seen you, you"ve grown up like this."
Xiao Bai was sadly a head shorter than he was. He stammered as he said: "Even if they"ll see me every day, I"ll grow up like this."
Shi Daming gave him a look of admiration. He has no stage fright, would respond to words… not bad, there would be prospects for him. He jumped up in an exaggerated way, then he pointed at him as he said: "Don"t tell me you"re not Luo Peijiao?" At long last, this topic could be brought up.
"Yes, I"m Zeng Bai."
Shi Daming pointed at his face and laughed heartily as he said: "There"s no need to add some more. It"s already a plaster wall."
Xiao Bai was covered with thick powder. He stared blankly at the director, who held up a big sign. One word at a time, he read: "It"s better than your coal powder."
(Note: Pun intended. Zeng Bai「曾白」, if read as "Ceng Bai" would mean "already white" in English. Zeng Bai"s powder was already thick, that"s why when he said his name was Zeng Bai, Shi Daming said that there"s no need to add more. Lol)
Yan Su"ang and Chen Fei simultaneously looked at the sign ‘It"s better than your coal powder’ and did not say anything.
Shi Daming turned to the camera. “The viewers sitting in front of their TV sets must now be thinking about why it"s Zeng Bai, instead of Luo Peijiao, who"s sitting next to me. It was because…” He lengthened his p.r.o.nunciation and after holding on for ten seconds, he discovered that the new partner next to him did not get the message, so he had no choice but to continue his own sentence. “He ran away with another man.”
Bang! He slammed the script on the table, stood up angrily, and roared at the camera: “d.a.m.n you, Luo Peijiao. You"re capable of leaving, don’t come back! You even abandoned me. It makes me furious. Which part of me isn"t good? Which part isn"t comparable to his!?"
After he vented out, he turned around and looked at Xiao Bai, who was staring blankly at him. “What’s with your expression?”
Xiao Bai suddenly came to him and patted his head. “Don’t be sad.”
Shi Daming was petrified.
Chen Fei gestured below that this was not a personal performance, while the Great G.o.d was almost air-dried on the side! He was still waiting for this segment of the program to break through thirty percent with the help of the Great G.o.d’s popularity.
Shi Daming clapped, “Let"s welcome today’s guest, the superstar in the film industry, the superstar in the singing world, the dream lover of women, the natural love rival of men… Yan—Su—Ang.”
The camera suddenly turned.
Yan Su’ang leaned against the throne, with one hand propping up against his jaw and the corner of his mouth slightly hooked up a smile, just like a glorious king facing the world.