"Now I understand why even after we got married there were things you talked about only with Solus. Now I know that many things I thought you had invented because you loved me, like Tuner, the Camellia, and the stroller are just stuff you plagiarized from Earth.
"Deep inside of me, I always knew there was something wrong with you. Every time I read your personnel file, I found it incredible that someone so young could act in such a cold and controlled manner." Kamila"s anger and frustration grew with every word she spoke.
"I should have guessed the truth back when you came clear with me about being an Abomination. In hindsight, it makes perfect sense. Your brilliant ideas were just memories from another life just like it"s perfectly normal for a man of your age to be mature."
She took a long pause, averting her gaze from the Abomination"s face that still resembled Derek instead of Lith and staring at the floor until she managed to calm down again.
"So let me say it again, Derek McCoy. I"m sorry." She raised her head, looking him in the eyes with a steel gaze. "I"m sorry for all the s.h.i.+t life threw at you back on Earth. I"m sorry that you felt so bad about yourself that you had to punish yourself with a reincarnation curse.
"I"m sorry that you had to spend your whole life lying to everyone around you, no matter how much they loved you. Yet that"s your problem, not mine. I"m sorry, but I"m not Solus and I"m not going to spend my life coddling your feelings."
Lith"s stomach twisted into a notch as he clenched his hands so hard that even his energy knuckles popped.
"If you want me to stay with you, you need to grow up."
"Wait, what?" Her words both shocked and confused him.
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"You heard me. Grow. Up." She dragged the chair closer until her face was centimeters from Lith"s. "I don"t want to hear that bulls.h.i.+t about being unable to protect me and taking the burden of the whole world on your shoulders ever again.
"You are now 45 years old. After everything you went through, you should have realized by now that no matter how much you love someone, you can"t protect them from the rest of the world, nor they you.
"You didn"t fail Carl when he was run over just like I didn"t fail Zinya when Fallmug got his filthy hands on her for years. It"s not your fault if those b.a.s.t.a.r.ds from Verendi tried to kill me.
"People die every day on every G.o.dd.a.m.n planet and there"s not enough magic in the entire universe that can change that.
"You can"t wait to have crafted some perfect world free from harm and pain before allowing yourself to be happy. You must learn to appreciate every moment you spend with the people you love in the world as it is, or you"ll infect our daughter with your fear."
Kamila brought his hand to her womb as his eyes went wide in astonishment.
"Derek McCoy was very unlucky but also one of the bravest men that I"ve ever known. Yet despite all of his sacrifices, despite all he managed to achieve, he died as he lived. In hopeless misery.
"Lith Verhen is supposed to learn from Derek"s mistakes. To inherit his will but discard his obsessions. Otherwise your third life will end up just like the first. I"m not asking you to blindly accept your fate or disregard my safety.
"I"m just asking you to keep fighting, to do your best like you did all your three lives. You can turn down the Royals if you think it"s a losing mission, but don"t refuse it just for my sake.
"It"s dangerous, yes, but I"d rather risk losing you once and put an end to the war than spend the rest of my life away from you, raising our daughter alone while you are forced to fight against Thrud"s forces.
"I want our baby girl to grow up in a peaceful world as we did. To be surrounded by the love of her family as you did. She deserves a father no less than I deserve a husband, not to live in fear of a call from the frontlines announcing your death.
"Can you do it for her? For us?" Kamila leaned her forehead against his, closing her eyes as tears streamed from her eyes.
Asking the man she loved to risk his life was the hardest thing she had ever done, but she couldn"t afford to be egotistical anymore. She now had to fight for her yet-to-be-born child.
Lith remained dumbstruck until the word "daughter" hammered its way from his ears to his brain, forcing it to work again.
He knew for a month that he was going to be a father since, with three Guardians protecting the baby, it was more likely for the sun to disappear than for something to go wrong with the pregnancy.
Yet it had always been a vague concept.
A hazy figure he couldn"t picture clearly in his head. Now, however, it wasn"t a nondescript baby any longer. The word "daughter" changed everything, making the mental image of his child so real that Lith could almost see her.
"Yes, I can and I will." He took Kamila"s hands in his own and when she opened her eyes, he was glad to see that they were still as kind as he remembered them.
"Thank you." She gave him one of her dazzling smiles that made Lith feel like the luckiest man alive. Something that he had believed he wouldn"t see ever again after revealing the truth to her.
Yet the surprise he felt at such a sight was instantly dwarfed by a more astounding development.
Kamila"s hands had turned pitch-black and so did her face as darkness replaced her flesh. Lith could feel the resonance between his Abomination side and that of the child in Kamila"s womb as she used the baby girl"s abilities to shapes.h.i.+ft.
Only the darkness element could interact with itself, allowing what was left of the body of Derek McCoy to experience a real kiss after over twenty years. It made Lith feel loved, no matter what name or appearance he bore.
It also made the final argument between him and the Void disappear since they both agreed with Kamila about their responsibilities toward his daughter.
"Are you really okay with this?" Lith asked when Kamila pulled away to catch her breath. Unlike him, she still had lungs. "Do you really want to stay with an alien body s.n.a.t.c.her?"
"I saw your memories." She replied. "The baby was already dead so you s.n.a.t.c.hed no body. And yes, I"m okay with this. As I already said, Derek McCoy was, or better, is one of the bravest men I"ve ever known.
"I don"t agree with many things you did, but after seeing your life through your eyes, I understand that even the most despicable act you committed was due to necessity, not wanton cruelty.
"In my work as a Constable, I"ve seen enough to know which is which."
"I really thought that you would have dropped me like a bad habit." Lith sighed in relief.