"Hey." She pretended to be hurt. "I"m not sure that"s a compliment."
"It is." His eyes danced. "Believe me, it is."
"Okay, well, remember when we were at the beach that time, on the other side of the lake? We took a walk and you challenged me to a race."
"Me?" He stopped and pointed to himself. "That was you, missy. You"re the one who wanted to race."
"Anyway ..." She kept walking, undaunted. "I got about ten steps and I twisted my ankle. You had to practically carry me back to the picnic tables."
"That was the summer before I shipped out."
"Yeah, it was." She allowed her laughter to fade softly, mingling with the early summer breeze. They turned a corner and lost view of the campsite. The lake spread out before them, but still they walked on. Up ahead was a bench, and when they reached it, they sat together. Cody seemed careful to allow s.p.a.ce between them.
"So what happened? I thought you were going to be with your mom this weekend."
"She met some guy." He frowned. "I"m not sure how good he is for her. I was sort of hoping she"d meet someone at church, but she met this one at the health club."
"She made plans with him?"
"Yeah. She said she didn"t want me to miss a retreat on her account."
"That was nice."
"I guess." He breathed in slowly, deeply. "I still worry about her."
"I know. I can tell." She lifted her chin and filled her lungs with the sweet-smelling air. "I forget how great it feels to be out here, just us and G.o.d."
"That"s why I came. I need time with G.o.d. To really think about this coaching idea and whatever else my future holds."
Despite the cool bench beneath her Bailey felt her heart warm inside her. Cody, whose life might"ve turned out so different, was doing better than any of them had dreamed. His life was a living miracle, every aspect of it. "I"m glad. I still pray for you all the time."
His expression grew deeper, the connection between them as close as she shared with any of her brothers. "The way I still pray for you." He faced the water again. "Speaking of which, what happened to Tim? I thought he was taking this trip for sure."
"He got sick. Strep throat."
"Oooh." Cody frowned. "That"s too bad."
"Yeah. I told him I"d give him details when we get back on Monday."
Cody was quiet for a long moment. In the distance trilled the haunting sound of a blue heron, swooping low over the water. The sun had already set, and dusk was settling across the lake. "You and Tim," Cody said finally. "You"re still very serious, aren"t you?"
She sighed. He"d never quite understood that she had loved him first, that if he"d come back from Iraq and declared his love for her, she and Tim would"ve been nothing more than a pa.s.sing fling. But Cody didn"t have those feelings for her, and now she wished he wouldn"t ask questions about Tim.
"Sorry." Cody faced her. "You don"t have to answer."
"No, it"s fine." She folded her arms in front of her and pulled one foot up onto the bench. "Things are the same."
"Your dad said you and Tim are auditioning in New York next week."
"We are." She shrugged. "It"s something I"ve always wanted to do. But last time I was in the city it didn"t have the same appeal as before. I don"t know." She stared at the water, at the light reflecting across the center of the lake. "New York"s crazy. All sorts of noise and smells and cramped living. You have to look straight up on some streets just to see the sky."
Cody made a face. "Not my style."
"Definitely not." She gave him a sad smile. If she wound up in New York, that would be the end for her and Cody. Distance would have the final say. "My dad can"t stand it either."
The conversation flowed easily, without the walls she"d kept up around herself for so much of the last school year. It felt wonderful, being close to him again. "I guess I realized something this last time. When we go to New York, we stay at this nice hotel and see the top shows, sitting in the best seats. We stay three days and then we"re out of there. But that"s not how it would be if I lived there." She hugged her knee to her chest and looked at him. "I"d be commuting in on a bridge or a subway, walking fast and trying not to get accosted. I"d pay high rent to share a small apartment and have almost no fresh air."
The sky grew dusky, but in the dim light that remained an eagle floated in the distance and landed in a towering pine. A breeze brushed against her face and for a few seconds she closed her eyes. When she opened them, she smiled again. "No moments like this."
"What about Tim?" Cody seemed guarded when he talked about Tim. "How does he feel about the city?"
"He loves it. I think he could live there for the next five years and feel great about it. He really wants to perform."
"What about finding a church? Do they have anything like that in New York?"
"They do." She uttered a sad laugh. "But Broadway"s a long way from the Bible Belt."
They talked for a few minutes about a church she"d heard about not far from Times Square. "If I lived there, I guess I"d become a part of that."
Again Cody was quiet. Their hour was almost up, and they would need to get back soon. Neither of them had brought a flashlight. "So you really think it could happen, huh? You and Tim, performing on Broadway, living in New York City?" He smiled. "I guess that would be a dream come true for both of you."
"I guess." Everything about the possibility sounded right, like something she"d longed for since her early days with Christian Kids Theater. But right now, with the fresh lake air all around them and Cody by her side, her dreams were no longer as clear as they"d once been. "What about you?" She hadn"t asked for a long time, and now she wanted to know. Even if she was afraid of his answer. "You seeing anyone?"
"Me?" A quiet laugh rattled his chest. "Definitely not. G.o.d"s still making me into the guy I need to be. I want that before I want a girlfriend."
His answer made her feel starry eyed. "She"s a lucky girl, Cody."
"I"m saving my heart for her. Any sort of casual dating at this point in my life would only cheapen what I have to offer." He looked out at the water again. "Whoever she is."
For the craziest moment, Bailey wanted to tell him that he didn"t need to wonder, that no other girl would ever love him the way she could love him. But she stopped herself before she said something and sounded like a crazy person. She had a boyfriend, after all. She could hardly confess her love to the friend beside her when she had just finished talking about building a life with Tim in New York City.
"What are you thinking?" Again Cody seemed to read her mind.
"Nothing." Her smile was shyer than before. "Nothing I can tell you, anyway." She put both her feet down on the ground and kicked at his tennis shoe. "I"d say let"s race back, but I can"t afford another sprained ankle. Not with my audition next week."
Again he laughed. "That"s just one of the things I love about you, Bailey. You make me laugh."
"Same with you."
"Can I tell you something?" His knee brushed against hers, and just as quickly he eased back, keeping things between them appropriate and on the level.
"Yes. That"s the deal now. We"re friends." She tapped his foot again. "You can tell me anything."
"Okay, now, don"t weird out on me or think I"m trying to get between you and Tim or anything."
She giggled. "Go on. At this rate you"ll never spit it out." "The truth is I thank G.o.d every day for you, Bailey. For your family and your friendship. For the way we"ve found each other again."
"Ahhh." She tilted her head and let her eyes get lost in his. The last remainder of daylight shone on his face and she knew without a doubt she"d remember this moment as long as she lived. Without wondering whether it was right or wrong, she put her arms around his neck and hugged him. "That means the world, Cody." The hug was quick, nothing she wouldn"t give one of her brothers. "I"m glad you told me." She pulled back and felt her eyes start to dance. "Now it"s my turn."
"Go on."
"I thank G.o.d for you too. I was so mad at you back in the fall, when you wouldn"t talk to me." She made a face and wagged her fist at him. "I thought we"d never have a day like this again in all our lives."
"I was worried about it."
"But here we are." She held up her hands and let them fall lightly to her knees. "That"s why G.o.d"s so amazing. He knows how to fix things, even after we make a mess of them."
"Exactly." He stood and reached out his hand. "Come on, it"ll be pitch dark in a few minutes."
She took his hand and felt the thrill of his touch all the way to her toes. Once she was standing she drew her fingers from his and kept the conversation light. She could hardly hold hands with Cody. First, it would only confuse things. And second, holding hands with Tim never sent a chill through her. And she wasn"t ready to a.n.a.lyze what that meant or what it said about her relationship with Tim. Better to keep her distance where Cody was concerned. Besides, he was holding out body and soul for the girl of his dreams. She didn"t want to get in the way of that, even if a part of her desperately wished she were that girl.
On the way back, Cody told her about a bear sighting in the woods not far from the campsite.
"Great." She was about to tell him the story of her little brother BJ and a northern copperhead he"d nearly stepped on when her foot settled on something soft and slithery. She screamed and fell all at the same time, her ankle giving way beneath her as she dropped. She had no idea how Cody moved so fast or how in the dark he was able to catch her, but the next thing she knew she was in his arms, clinging to his neck. She pointed down at the ground. "There"s a snake, Cody! Be careful."
He set her down a few feet away and went back to the spot where she"d felt the snake. Using the toe of his shoe, he pressed around and came up with something long and bendable. "This, you mean?"
He brought it closer and she stifled another scream. "Don"t, Cody! It could be poisonous. Shawn says there"s copperheads all around this lake."
"Well ..." He held his hands out so she could see exactly what had frightened her. "This branch is definitely not part of the copperhead family, I can promise you that much."
Bailey straightened and stared at the thing Cody was holding. "A branch? You"ve gotta be kidding. I could feel it moving."
"It"s a young branch. A little more flexible than some." He tossed it off the path and grinned at her. "You probably scared it to death."
She tested her ankle, but it was fine, and suddenly she pictured herself stepping on the branch and practically jumping into Cody"s arms. She burst into laughter again and had to hold onto Cody"s waist as they walked. Otherwise she would"ve fallen to the ground, unable to breathe because she was giggling so hard.
The others already had flashlights out, and as they reached base camp, everyone wanted to know what was so funny. Bailey told her snake story, but when she reached the part about stepping on the branch, she cracked up once again. Cody had to finish the story.
It was like that throughout the weekend. She had hours of solitude with the Lord, times when she could pray about the direction G.o.d had for her life, and whether New York City was something she really wanted. Other hours she and the girls talked together, or she and Cody took long walks together. Always their time ended up in laughter, except for once - the last night of the retreat.
That night, with the moon little more than a thumbnail of light overhead, they sat by the fire until everyone else had turned in. They talked about Cody"s mother and Bailey"s wonderful family and Cody"s dream to help kids the way Bailey"s parents had helped him. They sat close together, neither of them seeming to mind when their knees touched a time or two.
Before they turned in, Cody held out his hands to her. "Pray with me, Bailey. Can you do that?"
She wasn"t sure how smart it was, but she didn"t hesitate. She slipped her fingers in his and together they bowed their heads. She started the prayer, the way she"d seen her mom and dad pray together so many times over the years. "Dear Lord, this time away has been so good for us, for the friendships that have grown stronger and for the way You feel closer than ever. Right now I want to thank You for Cody and his friendship. Please, Lord, keep him close to You always. And let him know how much he means to me."
It was Cody"s turn, and he gave her fingers a subtle squeeze as he started. "G.o.d, You know how I feel about Bailey." He hesitated for a moment, as if his feelings for her weren"t something he was willing to actually put into words. "I begged You for a second chance at her friendship, and now here we are. Copperhead snake branches and all." They both shared a couple seconds of quiet laughter, the sound of the fire crackling a few feet away. When he had control again, he finished. "Lord, I ask that You protect what we"ve found on the far side of Lake Monroe this weekend. I feel closer to Bailey than ever before, and I"m blessed for that fact.
"People could live all their lives and never have a friend like Bailey Flanigan. So thank You, Lord. And I pray for her audition coming up. If You want her to live in New York, to perform there and be part of a revival taking place in that city, then throw open the doors for her this next week. Let her stand out and let her get a role in a Broadway play." He paused, and there was no hiding the sadness that had crept into his voice. "But only if it"s Your will, Father. Otherwise, shut the door. Then she"ll know which way You"re leading her."
He took a steadying breath. "Be with Tim, too, dear G.o.d. If these two are meant to be together, make that clear. Life is too short to waste on half-hearted connections and meaningless runthroughs. So let them know whether what they have is something that will last." He paused once more. "Most of all, let Bailey know how much I love her. How much I"ve always loved her. In Jesus" name, amen."
Bailey didn"t want to let go of his hands, but slowly he let go first. She had lost her breath somewhere around the part about half-hearted connections and meaningless run-throughs, and when he asked G.o.d to let her know how much he loved her she felt her heart go into a rhythm she didn"t recognize. She swallowed hard, trying to find a way to right her world back on its axis. He didn"t mean the sort of love she"d always wanted from him. It"s only a friendship love, she told herself. Nothing more.
But still, as they stood and shared a long hug, and as he walked her to her cabin and they said good night, Bailey had to remember to exhale. She lay in her bed in her sleeping bag for a long time, looking out the window at a brilliant spread of stars and replaying every word of Cody"s prayer. He really did love her. That much was evident by the way he"d asked G.o.d to bless her audition, and in the way he"d prayed for her and Tim. When was the last time she and Tim had prayed like this, with such intensity about serious matters? She couldn"t remember the last time they"d prayed together about anything.
She fell asleep certain that the one thing she didn"t want was an existence of half-hearted connections and meaningless runthroughs. Never mind that Cody didn"t see her as the girl of his dreams, the girl he was saving his love for. They had this between them, a wonderful bond that some people could spend their whole lives seeking.
Before she was fully asleep, she made up her mind about something: she would rather be alone than have a love that was less intimate than what she still shared with Cody Coleman. They had found something special these past few days. A deep friendship-love that had come to life once more amidst the presence of northern copperhead snake branches and laughter and G.o.d.
Most of all, G.o.d.
Other Life-Changing Fictionby Karen Kingsbury.
9/11 Series.
One Tuesday Morning Beyond Tuesday Morning.
Every Now and Then Lost Love Series Even Now.
Ever After Every Now and Then.
Above the Line Series Above the Line: Take One.
Above the Line: Take Two Above the Line: Take Three (spring 2010).
Above the Line: Final Cut (summer 2010) Stand-Alone t.i.tles Oceans Apart Between Sundays.
This Side of Heaven When Joy Came to Stay On Every Side Divine.
Like Dandelion Dust Where Yesterday Lives.
Shades of Blue (fall 2009) Redemption Series Redemption Remember.
Return Rejoice Reunion.
Firstborn Series Fame Forgiven Found Family.
Forever Sunrise Series Sunrise Summer.
Someday Sunset Red Glove Series Gideon"s Gift Maggie"s Miracle Sarah"s Song.
Hannah"s Hope Forever Faithful Series Waiting for Morning Moment of Weakness.
Halfway to Forever Women of Faith Fiction Series A Time to Dance.
A Time to Embrace Cody Gunner Series.
A Thousand Tomorrows Just Beyond the Clouds Children"s t.i.tles.
Let Me Hold You Longer Let"s Go on a Mommy Date We Believe in Christmas.
Let"s Go Have a Daddy Day (spring 2009) Miracle Collections A Treasury of Christmas Miracles A Treasury of Miracles for Women.
A Treasury of Miracles for Teens A Treasury of Miracles for Friends A Treasury of Adoption Miracles.