TARTUFFE, DORINE

TARTUFFE (speaking to his valet, off the stage, as soon as he sees Dorine is there) Lawrence, put up my hair-cloth shirt and scourge, And pray that Heaven may shed its light upon you.

If any come to see me, say I"m gone To share my alms among the prisoners.

DORINE (aside) What affectation and what showing off!

TARTUFFE What do you want with me?

DORINE To tell you ...

TARTUFFE (taking a handkerchief from his pocket) Ah!

Before you speak, pray take this handkerchief.

DORINE What?

TARTUFFE Cover up that bosom, which I can"t Endure to look on. Things like that offend Our souls, and fill our minds with sinful thoughts.

DORINE Are you so tender to temptation, then, And has the flesh such power upon your senses?

I don"t know how you get in such a heat; For my part, I am not so p.r.o.ne to l.u.s.t, And I could see you stripped from head to foot, And all your hide not tempt me in the least.

TARTUFFE Show in your speech some little modesty, Or I must instantly take leave of you.

DORINE No, no, I"ll leave you to yourself; I"ve only One thing to say: Madam will soon be down, And begs the favour of a word with you.

TARTUFFE Ah! Willingly.

DORINE (aside) How gentle all at once!

My faith, I still believe I"ve hit upon it.

TARTUFFE Will she come soon?

DORINE I think I hear her now.

Yes, here she is herself; I"ll leave you with her.

SCENE III

ELMIRE, TARTUFFE

TARTUFFE May Heaven"s overflowing kindness ever Give you good health of body and of soul, And bless your days according to the wishes And prayers of its most humble votary!

ELMIRE I"m very grateful for your pious wishes.

But let"s sit down, so we may talk at ease.

TARTUFFE (after sitting down) And how are you recovered from your illness?

ELMIRE (sitting down also) Quite well; the fever soon let go its hold.

TARTUFFE My prayers, I fear, have not sufficient merit To have drawn down this favour from on high; But each entreaty that I made to Heaven Had for its object your recovery.

ELMIRE You"re too solicitous on my behalf.

TARTUFFE We could not cherish your dear health too much; I would have given mine, to help restore it.

ELMIRE That"s pushing Christian charity too far; I owe you many thanks for so much kindness.

TARTUFFE I do far less for you than you deserve.

ELMIRE There is a matter that I wished to speak of In private; I am glad there"s no one here To listen.

TARTUFFE Madam, I am overjoyed.

"Tis sweet to find myself alone with you.

This is an opportunity I"ve asked Of Heaven, many a time; till now, in vain.

ELMIRE All that I wish, is just a word from you, Quite frank and open, hiding nothing from me.

(DAMIS, without their seeing him, opens the closet door halfway.)

TARTUFFE I too could wish, as Heaven"s especial favour, To lay my soul quite open to your eyes, And swear to you, the trouble that I made About those visits which your charms attract, Does not result from any hatred toward you, But rather from a pa.s.sionate devotion, And purest motives ...

ELMIRE That is how I take it, I think "tis my salvation that concerns you.

TARTUFFE (pressing her finger tips) Madam, "tis so; and such is my devotion ...

ELMIRE Ouch! but you squeeze too hard.

TARTUFFE Excess of zeal.

In no way could I ever mean to hurt you, And I"d as soon ...

(He puts his hand on her knee.)

ELMIRE What"s your hand doing there?

TARTUFFE Feeling your gown; the stuff is very soft.

ELMIRE Let be, I beg you; I am very ticklish.

(She moves her chair away, and Tartuffe brings his nearer.)

TARTUFFE (handling the lace yoke of Elmire"s dress) Dear me how wonderful in workmanship This lace is! They do marvels, nowadays; Things of all kinds were never better made.

ELMIRE Yes, very true. But let us come to business.

They say my husband means to break his word.

And marry Mariane to you. Is"t so?

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